I do plan to write 'The Talk' soon, but since we just got through a doozy of a story (I mean, the last few chapters all tied in together) I decided to do a couple oners before returning to the plot. So, this one goes out to Morgana Pendragon who asked for Merlin getting cursed with bad luck. I realize you probably wanted it to be angsty and full of whump, but I decided on a funny thing.

So, thanks for reading. I don't own anyone. And thank you to everyone who reviewed, alerted, and favorited last chapter.

Drop me a comment if you can!

"Here, Merlin, take this ghastly thing and burn it," Arthur stated as he, his servant, Leon, and Gwaine rode back towards Camelot. He shoved a jester's hat at Merlin, a gag gift given to Arthur by a young knight.

"Isn't that a little harsh, Arthur?" Merlin questioned looking down at the hat. There was something a little off about the thing, nothing evil just strange, but the warlock couldn't figure out what that was exactly. "Sir Isaac put a lot of thought into this gift." Actually, it looked as if Sir Isaac bought the first thing he saw, but Merlin's mother had taught him never to take a gift for granted.

"Isaac and I give each other stupid things like that all the time," Arthur explained, in a tone that suggested he was talking to a two year old. "He's probably expecting me to burn it."

"Well, I like it," Gwaine stated taking the hat from Merlin. He then shoved it on the warlock's head, his face splitting into a grin.

"You know, Merlin, I might need a new Court Jester," Arthur commented smirking at Merlin's disgruntled look.

"Very funny," Merlin grumbled yanking the hat off his head. Surprisingly, the mysterious 'wrongness' had dissipated from the hat. Eyebrows scrunched up, Merlin shook his head. Perhaps he had been imagining the wrongness.

The quartet continued riding, Gwaine cheerfully telling them about a dream he had had where he was given an apple pie the size of his head. "And it tasted, I shite you not, like turkey. It was, by far, the most delicious pie I had ever had."

"Why is it that your dreams are either about coitus or apple pie tasting like meat?" Leon questioned curiously.

"Oh, that reminds me," Gwaine exclaimed, ignoring Leon's question, and launching into a rather inappropriate dream he had had about the new barmaid. He had just gotten to a particularly raunchy part, when suddenly something swooped down at Merlin's horse, spooking it. It jumped up on its hind legs, knocking the warlock off the back.

He hit the ground hard, the air knocked from his lungs. Gasping for breath, very much aware of his friends scrambling from their horses to come to his aid, Merlin watched as a bird swooped at his horse a second time before flying away.

"Are you okay, mate?" Gwaine asked worriedly hauling the warlock to his feet.

"Y-yeah," Merlin stammered nodding, uninjured but shaken. "I'm fine."

As Leon chased after Merlin's horse, Arthur stooped down to pick up the hat Merlin had dropped. He held it out for the warlock, a smirk on his face, and asked, "Are you sure you don't want to be Court Jester?"

"Ha ha," Merlin retorted sarcastically and pushed past Arthur, moving towards his newly caught horse, led by Leon. Instead of getting back on, he just took the reins and started walking back towards Camelot.

Merlin

The rest of the journey back was met with a few more mishaps, but the knights and Arthur brushed them off as Merlin's usual clumsiness. Merlin, on the other hand, was left with a sense of worry. He was clumsy, yes, but never this bad.

He left his horse with the stable boys, but as he walked away he tripped over his feet, skinning his knee on the cobblestone pathway as he landed on the ground. Hissing, he ignored Arthur's, "If I didn't know any better I'd say you were drunk."

As quickly as he could go without another incident, Merlin went back to Gaius' chambers, clutching tightly to his bag. He burst into the room, about to call for his uncle, but the words caught in his throat when he ran into the entryway.

"Ow," he muttered clutching his arm.

"Merlin?" Gaius called from above. "Is everything alright?"

"No," Merlin answered truthfully, dropping his bag onto the table. "I think I've been cursed."

"Not again," Gaius stated quickly climbing down the ladder. He rushed towards his nephew, already asking him what sort of creature they had run into, but Merlin held up his hand and said, "Not that type of cursed, Gaius."

"Then what?" The elderly man's eyebrows were raised in inquiry as he eyed the younger man cautiously.

"I can't stop tripping over things," Merlin whispered and Gaius' eyebrows furrowed.

"Merlin, you may not be as clumsy as Arthur depicts you, but I've seen…"

"No, you don't understand," the warlock continued quickly. "It started with my horse bucking me off. That one incident could have been a coincidence, since Winter has been sick and I've been riding Midnight, but after that I tripped over a root, stepped in something that may or may not been a dead animal, skinned my knee outside the castle, run into the doorway…"

"Merlin, those all could be coincidences," Gaius pointed out patiently.

"One or two maybe, but that's way too many incidents to be coincidences. Someone cursed me or, or that…" Merlin's eyes widened and he smacked himself in the forehead. "I knew there was something off about that hat," he whispered noticing the questioning look on his uncle's face. "Arthur was given a hat by Sir Isaac, and he told me they give each other gifts like that all the time, but it seems Isaac has resorted to witchcraft or…" Merlin trailed off, noting the small chuckle coming from Gaius. "What?"

"Isaac and Arthur have been friends for years, Merlin. They pull pranks like this all the time. Last time Arthur gave Isaac a pendant that turned Isaac's hair green."

"B-but sorcery…"

"It's not really sorcerer. At least, the sorcerers cannot be punished since they have long since died. They're mostly just traveler traps sold throughout the kingdoms."

"B-but I…" Merlin tried to wrap his head around this childish act, but it left him still very much confused. "He actually participates in things such as this? And Uther never berated him for it."

"Uther never knew," Gaius informed Merlin returning to his ladder. "It'll wear off by the end of the day, so just stay out of trouble until then."

"But…"

Gaius seemed to have dismissed Merlin. With a sigh, the warlock turned and headed back outside, carefully maneuvering around everything to avoid another injury. So, he was cursed but not really cursed, and he actually thought he knew everything about Arthur.

Merlin

Arthur spotted Merlin from his window, watching as the younger man tripped over his feet and knocked a maid to the floor. Usually, Arthur would roll his eyes at this, already used to Merlin's clumsy nature, but it had never been this bad. Once or twice in a week was one thing, but six different incidences, in the same day? Something was not right.

The king turned, his eyes settling on the ugly, jester hat sitting on his table. Eyebrows furrowed, he crossed the room, picking it up. He studied the hat for a few moments, finally finding a familiar stamp from a vendor he had frequented in his travels; particularly when he was about to visit Sir Isaac.

Partially amused, partially guilty, Arthur sat down to write a strongly worded letter to Isaac, asking him to refrain from doing anymore pranks. The last thing Arthur needed was Merlin getting hurt because of his stupid 'war' with Isaac.

I know, not exactly a big 'protecting Merlin' scene, but I tried.

Bye!