I don't know about this one, but a few people wanted to see a Freya reveal chapter. And I... well I tried, I really did. Please excuse this one.
So, thanks for reading, thank you for the comments, alerts, and/or favs. And, really, I am sorry for this.
I don't own 'em and bye!
It was Arthur who brought up the subject. The knights and Merlin were sitting around the fire, passing the wineskin Gwaine bought, getting ready to bunk down for the night, when the blond said, "Who was your first love?" He hadn't asked anyone in general, but it got the rest of the men to think about the people in their lives. For Merlin, his mind went to a dark-haired, blue-eyed girl in a maroon dress.
"You won't like it, sire," Leon finally said glancing over at Arthur.
"Who?"
"Gwen," Leon muttered looking down at his hands, clearly afraid Arthur was going to yell at him, but the king surprised the blond knight by bursting out laughing.
Leon looked up, confused, and Arthur said, "I know you two shared your first kiss, Leon. She told me. You were twelve, she was ten. I'm not mad."
"Oh, thank the gods." Leon turned to Elyan, handing him the wineskin, and asked, "What about you?"
"Her name was Melinda…"
"Horse face, Melinda?" Arthur exclaimed giving Elyan an aghast look.
"She doesn't have a horse face," Elyan argued shaking his head, throwing an acorn at the blond. "And she's really nice, we still talk on occasion." Elyan gave the wineskin to Percival and said, "What about you?"
"I haven't found them yet," Percival answered taking a swig from the wineskin, "but when I do, I'll know."
"Sap," Gwaine muttered snatching the wineskin from the bigger man. He took a long pull on it before saying, "Alright gents, I'm going to tell you about my first…"
"I said love, Gwaine, not the first maiden you bedded," Arthur interrupted reaching over to take the wineskin from the knight. "We don't need to harm Merlin's virginal ears." He grinned at Merlin's small glare, taking a sip from the wineskin. He then held it out to the warlock and asked, "What about you?"
"I'm pretty tired," Merlin answered quickly, ignoring the wineskin. He laid down, putting his back to the knights, and didn't make any attempts to answer their probing questions. Eventually the knights stopped asking and left him alone.
He stayed awake long after the others dropped off, waiting until he was sure they were all asleep before sitting up. He grabbed a nearby stick, poking at the fire, staring into the dying flames. He was not aware anyone else was awake until Percival softly asked, "You alright, Merlin?"
Merlin jumped, turning his attention to the tallest knight. He was sitting against a tree, using his dirk to whittle a small figurine. At first, Merlin almost lied, almost told Percival that he was fine, but instead he shrugged.
"You want to talk about it?"
"Not really." Merlin dragged himself to his feet, crossing the small space so he could sit next to Percival. "What are you making?"
"Trying to make a horse," Percival answered digging his knife into the wood. "Probably going to turn into another dog. That's the only thing I seem to be able to make."
Merlin watched the knight work for a long while, neither man saying a word, but finally Percival said, "I'll listen, if you want to talk."
"I know," Merlin answered looking down at his hands, picking at his nails. "I just…" he trailed off, biting his lip.
"What was her name?" Percival asked curiously, his eyes still on his task. The gentle giant might not talk much, but he was one of the most observant people Merlin had ever met.
"Freya," the warlock whispered clenching his hands into fists. "She, um…" he squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head back and forth. He sniffed, opening his eyes, and turned his head towards Percival, giving the knight a sad smile. "Even after all these years, I still miss her."
"How'd she die?"
"She'd, uh…" A lump formed in his throat, his vision blurring slightly, but he still managed to choke out, "She'd been cursed, couldn't control what was happening to her, and she was killed for it." He forced himself not to look at Arthur; the blond must never know he'd had a hand in killing an innocent girl. "She's not gone, not really, but I can't be with her."
"Why not?"
"She lives in the lake, which I know sounds crazy, but…"
"I believe you." Merlin looked up and Percival gave him a kind smile. "My mother used to tell me stories, about people who lived in the lake. Those who haven't quite moved onto the next world, who offer their help whenever it's needed; she said they were just stories, but I never quite believed her."
"She's in a place called Avalon," Merlin explained softly, using his fingers to doodle in the dirt. "The lady of the lake."
"You'll see her one day," Percival said working on his horse's (dog's?) ear. "Hopefully not for a long while. I like having you around." The bigger man offered Merlin another smile, and the warlock returned it, albeit a smaller one. "Tell me about her."
"Freya?" When Percival nodded, Merlin asked, "What do you want to know?"
"Whatever you wish to tell me."
So, Merlin told Percival about Freya, everything he could remember, from their first meeting to her last breath, and the other man listened carefully, never saying a word, continuing his whittling. Eventually, Merlin talked himself into exhaustion and he fell asleep leaning against the other man.
He awoke the next morning wrapped in a cloak, a small dog sitting next to his feet, and he couldn't help smiling. Percival caught his eyes as they were packing up camp and winked, but something else flickered across his face, something that told Merlin the knight would keep the warlock's secret until the smaller man decided to share it. And for that, Merlin was grateful.
He missed Freya every day, still wished he could touch her, hold her, have her there with him, solid and real, and Percival was right, one day Merlin would see her again.
"Merlin, hurry up or we're leaving without you," Arthur called, and Merlin shook his head, clearing away his melancholy. He grabbed his knapsack, quickly chasing after the other knights, his friends, and despite wanting to be with Freya again he knew that he could wait a while longer.
"Coming Arthur." His friends needed him right now, so he knew Freya would understand.