Chapter Ninety Eight

Peter

Well we missed all the boring bits of the wedding planning although Charlotte would have been happy talking dresses and fucking flowers with the rest of them. I never saw the attraction of fancy weddings they were just a waste of time and energy.

"I suppose they'll have The Major dressed up like a fucking waiter."

"Peter you have no heart."

"Heart? More like I have a brain that says dressing up like a demented fucking penguin isn't necessary in order to get married."

Charlotte

"I wonder how Darius and Sara are getting on?"

I would try anything to stop Peter getting on his soap box, that just went on and on and on!

"They'll be fine, why shouldn't they be? We did our fairy godmother bit, now it's down to them. I'll bet it'll cause a few raised eyebrows when he turns up at the wedding with her."

"That's if they come. They might want some time to themselves, to readjust."

"You mean have wild steamy vampire sex."

I groaned, my mate was incorrigible!

"Let's just leave it at getting to know each other shall we?"

We drove back to the others and I became involved in the wedding preparations just as Peter had known I would but I kept a weather eye on him and could see he and Emmett were up to no good. It wasn't worth trying to talk Peter out of whatever madcap scheme he had thought up, nor was it worth trying to threaten him. I just hoped The Major and Jay were prepared for a rough ride. The Major at least should be, he knew Peter well enough by now! Their little plotting sessions didn't go unnoticed by the others either.

"What are they planning Charlotte?"

"I have no idea Esme but nothing good I suspect."

"Why can't Peter just enjoy himself instead of formulating chaos?"

"They are one and the same thing to him Esme and I gave up trying to control my husband years ago when I realized complaining just made him ten times worse. I think the best we can hope for is that both grooms survive to say their vows."

She looked at me to see if I were kidding and decided probably not.

"Should I ask Carlisle to speak to them?"

"I wouldn't, unless you want things to get far far worse. I'd look the other way and pray."

The Major and Bella were now calm again and spent most of their time together planning their new home, they were looking for a ranch in North Dakota although Peter was working on them to change the destination to Colorado. I wasn't sure having those two so close was a good idea but Peter was determined so I left him to it.

Alice and Jay were going to remain with Carlisle and Esme much to the delight of those two and Emmett and Rosalie. However they planned a world cruise for their honeymoon. It was something Alice had always wanted to do but obviously it was impossible on a cruise ship full of humans so Carlisle and Esme had arranged for an ocean going yacht to take them as a wedding present. Jay was finding out his fiancee had very strong views and ideas and was going with the flow, at least for now but I had an idea he might put his foot down sooner or later. On the other hand they were so besotted with each other maybe not.

Jasper

I knew Peter was up to something along with Emmett and I had warned them that it had better not interrupt or spoil the wedding ceremony itself. Although they swore to me they had no evil intentions I didn't believe them for a second, there was just too much excitement in the air to accept that! Carlisle's friend William was going to conduct the service on board Hunter's boat so there wouldn't be room for any of Peter's more theatrical tricks.

I remembered another friend Simon who foolishly left the reception in Peters "capable" hands and lived to regret it. His wife was a country girl from Oklahoma and Peter staged a singer on horseback to perform Oh What a Beautiful Mornin' which would have been quite romantic had not the horse been a pantomime one! And as if that weren't enough he then went on to change the lyrics of another song to the original more earthy lyrics and finished up with "I Can't Say No" also from the musical but we were all pretty sure the song had little in common with the original! Hence he was not involved in this wedding. Unfortunately it had been impossible to keep him out of the stag night arrangements but I would do my best to rein him in.

Esme

I knew Emmett and Peter were up to something and with things the way they were I didn't want any problems with the wedding so I asked Carlisle to have a quiet word. Bella was calm enough but she was still a newborn and I liked to think Peter had learned his lesson after what happened to him earlier but somehow I didn't think so. There was also Jazz and Jay to think of, they wanted the best for their mates and I didn't think either would be happy if Peter tried one of his stunts.

"I'm not sure Peter will take any notice of me Esme but I'll try if it makes you feel better."

Carlisle

I found Emmett and Peter together in one of the empty boat houses and as soon as they heard me coming they tried to look innocent, not altogether convincingly I have to say.

"Carlisle, you looking for someone?"

"Yes Peter as a matter of fact two someones and I've found them."

"Right, so what can we do for you? Something wrong?"

"Now why should there be anything wrong? We're getting ready for a wedding."

"Yep, I kinda figured that one out for myself."

"A wedding we would very much like to go off without a hitch."

"Ah well you see, I can't guarantee that."

I looked at them with sudden suspicion,

"Oh why?"

"Well Emmett here and I aren't involved so I'm afraid you're talking to the wrong people."

"Oh I don't think so. I just wanted to make sure there wasn't anything untoward planned….for the wedding that is."

They looked at each other so innocently I got a very bad feeling.

"Well we haven't heard anything and as I said we aren't involved in the wedding preparations but if we hear anything we'll be sure to let you know right away."

"Yeah Carlisle, anything at all we'll let you know."

Emmett appeared innocent faced and he wasn't a very good liar so maybe Esme and I were mistaken. I'd done all I could in any case, without coming out and actually accusing them.

Leaving them to whatever it was they were up to I went back to the boat and tried to reassure Esme.

"I really don't think they have any plans to ruin the wedding."

"Are you sure?"

"Honestly? Not one hundred percent but I get the feeling they might be up to something not connected with the wedding ceremony."

"Well if they mess things up I will personally murder the pair of them."

She stomped off but I saw her talking animatedly to Charlotte and Rose soon after. Obviously she hadn't been convinced by my words and was bringing the big guns to bear. I sincerely doubted that either Emmett or Peter would risk the wrath of their mates by doing anything to spoil the special day but I had the distinct feeling they were up to something which left the honeymoon or the bachelor party and I would be there for that and hopefully I could keep things within the bounds that the girls would be happy with.