Chapter 16: Mental Issues
Bruce's POV
"Master Bruce. You can have Master Dick train Miss Christine again. Master Damian and Master Timothy can track down Phoenix. Your injuries still haven't fully healed."
"I'm fine Alfred."
"I believe that you are not. You were stabbed in the stomach and in the shoulder. You mustn't strain your body."
"I need to find her, I need to stop her."
"What you need is rest Master Bruce." Then my two youngest sons and my daughter walks in the room.
"Yeah dad, don't worry, we'll take care of everything." Chris says putting her hands on her hips. "It's a good thing we weren't as injured as last time."
I look at the bandages around Damian's hands. "I swear when I find her-" I clench my fists.
"Master Bruce, that is enough." Alfred scolds.
"Yeah dad, listen to Alfred." Tim agrees.
"Where is Dick? I still need to talk to him about...two nights ago."
"He's at the hospital, covering his shift." Tim answers. I sigh and rub my face.
"Don't worry Father, I'll find Phoenix." Damian says sounding determined.
Chris puts her hand on Damian's shoulder. "We all will."
Damian turns to his sister and nods.
"But how? You already planted a tracker on her but it lead to a dead end!" Tim says sounding hopeless.
"Oh yeah, that's right. We followed the tracer but we found it in an alley. She didn't have any intentions of setting a trap."
"Give me a repost on her." I order.
"Well, after sometime, Phoenix came back. As in, she's on the move again. Trafficking is back up in The East Side, but crime is down." Damian reports.
"She's handling The Hood's drug ring again, and she's been sighted around The East Side lately." Chris continues.
"When are you planning on going after her?"
"We're not sure yet...her actions are somewhat unpredictable, and we were thinking we should let our wounds heal a little more."
"Okay. How about-"
I'm interrupted by my phone buzzing on my bedside table. I reach over and grab the phone. Dick's calling. I answer his call and press the phone to my ear.
"Yes, Dick?"
"Jason's gone."
My eyes widen.
****Break****
Dick's POV
I had been sitting in Jason's room, just staring at his unmoving face when suddenly his face twitched. His eyes had opened slightly, revealing his teal green eyes.
"Jason!"
"D...Dick?"
Oh my God! I had run out of the room and yelled for someone to get the doctor. No one had listened, though. Stupid public hospitals. I looked back at Jason. I guess it was okay to leave him. It's not like he could do much.
I ran out of the room to get the doctor. When I came back into the room with the doctor trailing behind me, Jason was gone. All of the medical equipment was on the hospital bed, but it's patient had disappeared. The doctor shouted to the nurses that there was a missing patient while I called Bruce.
"What do you mean he's gone?" Bruce's angry voice booms in my ear.
"I went to get the doctor because he had woken up, and when I came back he was gone!"
"Why did you leave him alone in the first place?!"
Bruce has been a lot harsher towards me lately...probably because of what happened two nights ago. For some reason, he still hasn't confronted me about it.
"I yelled for the doctor and no one did anything! What else was I supposed to do?"
I hear Bruce sigh over the phone. "Okay...we'll be there in a few minutes." And with that Bruce hangs up the phone.
Looks I'd better go looking for my brother.
Most of the doctors and nurses are probably looking for Jason on this floor, so I'd better look on the floor below us.
I'm running around, trying to find the staircase, and after two minutes I finally find it.
I rush down the stairs and find myself on a less frantic floor. I push past all of the people in the hallways mourning for their loved ones as my eyes dart across the hallway. I'm probably running around in circles, but I can't give up on finding Jason.
I've been searching for three minutes, and I still can't find him. Did he already leave the hospital? I'm sure people would've noticed a patient walking through the doors of the hospital. Then where is he?
I'm still running around the 2nd floor when something catches my eye. Near the fire escape, there's a girl wearing a black jacket that's way too big for her and denim jeans. She has hard teal green eyes, dark black hair, and pale skin. She's leaning out of the door and whispering something. It looks like she's talking to someone, but I don't know who. She turns her head and her eyes land on me. She lets out a small gasp, but she quickly turns and goes through the door.
She seems...familiar...
Autumn's POV
I was just about to visit Jason in the hospital when, on my way up the stairs, he came stumbling down the stairs looking like the zombie he is!
I'm just trying to get him out through the fire escape. There's no use in turning back now since Richard is standing in the stairway.
I try to carry Jason out, but damn...he's heavy. I really wish he wasn't so tall and big compared to me. Maybe, carrying him out would've been easier.
I stumble down the fire escape with Jason on my back. Why did he have to go and try to leave the hospital! Why didn't he just stay there? Gah!
"C'mon Jase! Help me out here! At least try to make yourself lighter!" I grunt, but he doesn't say anything. He only breathes lightly as he stares at my rubber shoes.
Finally, we get out of the hospital. All I need to do now is carry him through the streets of Gotham and back home.
Which will be easy cause, it's quite early in the morning and he'll just pass out as a drunkie seeking help from a kid to bring him home. The only problem is, he's wearing hospital clothes.
I take his arm and turn around. At least he's kinda standing...I take off my jacket and put it over him to avoid suspicions. Well, this isn't really my jacket, it's his. It's a good thing I thought of wearing his black jacket instead of my own.
I gently put his arm around my shoulders and I walk. His shoes rub against the sidewalk as I lug him around. I know this isn't the most comfortable position, but what choice do I have? I don't have my motorcycle, or a car, because the hospital isn't too far from the house.
I walk down the streets with him on my back.
"This is a job for Supergirl." I mutter.
Jason's only half awake, he's kinda walking as I help him...he really is like a drunk guy.
We stumble towards the clinic of Jason's friend. I hold onto Jason's arm. He seems like he's about to slip any second. I knock on the door. Please be home, please be home, please be home.
The door swings open and a woman holds the door as she stares at me.
"Oh my God! What happened?" She starts to take Jason, and together we help him to one of the beds in the small clinic.
"Sorry to bother you Eliza, but I was about to visit him in the hospital when I found him stumbling down the stairs. I would've brought him back, but it was too late. I was already spotted by his big brother." I explain as she checks up on him.
She nods. I walk towards the waiting area just by the main door.
I sit down and watch as Eliza stitches the wounds Jason pulled. I sigh, and a girl with short hair and hazel eyes about half my size sits beside me.
"Hey Autumn." She says.
"Hi Chloe." I say not looking at her.
"Mommy told me all about Jason. She said he is in pretty bad shape."
I nod. "Well she wasn't lying."
"Are you scared?"
I look at her. "Of what?"
"Of losing your brother?" She says looking down at her toy and fiddling with it in her hands.
I sigh and turn my head back, the curtains are now covering Jason's bed. "Yeah, I am." I admit.
"Mommy says that you shouldn't be scared. Jason is strong." Chloe says still not looking at me.
I look back at her. "I guess that's true."
After minutes of silence, Chloe's mom emerges from the curtains.
"Most of his injuries have healed. His stay at the hospital did him good but he's been dosed with a large amount of drugs so he will go in and out of consciousness for about two to three days. But other than that, it's nothing he won't heal from. I suggest that you won't let him go out yet for at least a week." She puts a hand on my shoulder. "Although, his mental issues have worsen." She says softly and I swallow and nod.
"Okay."
"I'll help you take him home." She says.
****Break****
I throw Jason his pants as he sits on the bed still looking like a zombie.
"Wear pants at least." I say and I turn around as he puts on his pants and a white shirt that I gave him.
I turn around and watch him lie back down. I sigh and take the hospital clothing and the black jacket.
I move out of his room and throw the jacket into the hamper and I burn the hospital clothes in my hands.
I move to the tech room just to find out what's going on over at the East Side or if I missed something. Nothing.
Suddenly, everything starts to turn red and black. My surroundings are just a shadow. My eyes widen as I float around the dark.
Then the scene changes. It's all hell...fire everywhere, the air is black, and it feels like it's stinging my lungs. Like I'm breathing burning fire instead of air. Ghouls walk around the black and crumbling ground.
The only light I see is coming from the lava, and the only sounds I hear are the screams of the souls.
I see people, white ghosts...bathing in fire and screaming to me for help, but they don't burn.
Then a girl, about eleven years old, emerges from behind me and passes right through me as if I'm not there at all.
I don't see the girl's face as she walks away. She doesn't look like any of the other ghosts, she looks more alive than dead. She's wearing a tattered red shirt and black jeans, and white rubber shoes as she walks.
Her dark hair is tied as she walks. She suddenly stops and turns her head and I take a good look at her. She's me.
When I was eleven. Her face is covered in dirt, mud, and wounds.
It's all a memory or a dream.
I didn't show any fear, but I was scared…
The eleven year old turns forward and continued walking. The ghosts pull at her leg and her arms. She has no weapon, no way to fight back. But she doesn't want to fight.
She just continues walking as the ghosts pull at her clothes and as they add more wounds to her face and arms.
I know she feels the stinging pain of the wounds, because with every cut, she tenses, but she doesn't care. She just keeps walking.
My eyes widen. "STOP!" I don't wanna remember this! I fall on my knees and pull my hair.
NOOOO, I DON'T WANT TO REMEMBER!
I listen the screams of the ghosts, and then I hear the fast footsteps of the girl.
I know she's running...from something big, something huge, something she can hardly imagine.
I open my eyes and turn around. I find myself standing in front of a giant. A disgusting giant.
It has huge arms and pale white skin. It has a mouth that's filled with blood, and sharp teeth as it smiles. He has no eyes and holes on his face for a nose.
He has six repulsive toes on both of his feet. He is very thin but very tall.
"Where are you, child?" The booming voice of the monster makes the eleven year old tense.
She stays still as the giant moves around looking for her. Soon, he comes face to face with the girl as he bends down to her height.
She nearly winces as he sniffs her and grins, blood dripping down his abhorrent teeth.
"I found you." He says, letting her smell his foul breath and she turns and runs towards the large pit of green liquid, ghouls try to make their way out of the pit but they can't.
The giant runs after her as they head towards the pit of ghouls.
"NOOOO!" I scream, yelling at the girl and holding onto my head.
But the girl doesn't listen and she continues to run.
Suddenly, she stops in between the giant and the pit.
The giant laughs. "Come to me, child." She shakes her head as tears start to form in her eyes.
"Come now." The giant gestures to himself.
But she shakes her head. "Why should I? You ate all my friends!" She yells.
"COME!" The giant yells, blood and saliva flies and hits the girl on her cheek.
She doesn't wipe it out. "I want...revenge." She clenches her fists as her face darkens. "I don't care what I have to do to get it!" She screams.
"YOU WANT ME? COME AND GET ME!" She jumps in the pit.
"NOOO!" And the giant follows.
The ghouls grab the girl's arm as she gets flushed into the pit of nothingness.
I collapse and cry as darkness surrounds me again. I wipe my tears and I stand up.
The loud fast beeping of a heart monitor starts the dream of the memory.
The same girl, covered in wounds and blood lies on a table connected to a machine. Many people surround her and watch her as she struggles.
"She's been asleep for three days." One of the women says.
"She's going to die."
"THAT'S WHY WE PULL HER OUT!" A boy says as he starts moving towards the wires but most of the men hold him back.
"No. That would be stupid. You can't just pull her out of the simulation. She'll die. We already tried that with the others." One of the men says, shaking his head.
Then the girl opens her eyes and sits up with wide eyes.
All of the men, women, and children's eyes widen.
The boy runs towards the eleven year old as she starts to cry. "It...it was just a dream!" She sobs into his shoulder as he hugs her.
They stay like that for a short moment until she lets go.
One of the counselors step closer. "No, it wasn't just a dream. Do you not remember? We wanted to test this new simulation, you and a few others volunteered. It went smooth at first...you were only supposed to find your way out and work as a team. But, something went wrong...a virus...entered the system...the giant in your dream. None of you were supposed to die. But the giant started to kill you all."
The girl's eyes widen. "The others! What happened to them?!" The counselor shakes his head.
"They died. Once the virus, or the giant, gets to you and kills you in the simulation...you die in real life. The machine is connected to your minds. Once you die in the simulation, you're supposed to wake up. But since the giant suddenly appeared, death became real to all of you."
"Why didn't you just take us out?"
"The virus...it corrupted the system. If we took you out then you would have died. I'm sorry, Cross. You were the only one that made it out. You all knew that it wasn't real at first, so you weren't scared. But when the virus entered...the fear, the pain, the wounds became real. Some of them died of the injuries that wasn't supposed to be real, and some died of fear, while some had their minds destroyed by the virus." The girl looks down at the wounds on her arms.
She cries again. "It's my fault...it's my fault...my fault…"
I look to my left and see a girl with pale skin, dark and short hair, walking out of the room with a smirk on her face. Ella.
The memory turns into nothingness again. I cry.
I blink my eyes into reality. I look around me and I'm back in the tech room. My arms and legs feel sore from sitting here, but how can that be? I've only been sitting here for a few minutes...right?
What's going on?
Did I just...black out? In the middle of working? I was just suddenly pulled into a dream...why is that?
I look at the window and see that the moon is up. How long have I been sitting here?
****Break****
Chris' POV
Why the hell would Jason even leave the hospital? Does he not want to heal? I guess I shouldn't be questioning his actions that much...he is crazy.
But really, how was he able to leave the hospital unnoticed? I know the people of Gotham can be stupid, but I didn't think that they would be so stupid as to not notice a zombie leaving the hospital. Maybe he got some help...
Things would be so much easier if Jason still had his tracker. Obviously, he doesn't. He was trained by Batman. The first thing he probably did after coming back to his senses is rip the tracker out of his arm (or wherever it was). Still...that's gross.
I don't know why Bruce won't report him to the GCPD. I guess it's partly because cops get in the way of his "work." But wouldn't having other people out looking for him make things easier? They might even find Autumn..well now that I think about it, more people could get hurt than necessary.
It's too late now. The hospital probably already reported Jason.
Earlier today, we all split up to go looking for Jason. We limited our search to a 4-mile radius because there's no way he could've gotten far. There were no reports of any cars leaving the area near the hospital. Yet, we still couldn't find him. It's so frustrating!
We've been looking for leads the entire day...well, more like they have. I've been relaxing and watching a Sherlock marathon all day.
The sun is going down and the sky is becoming darker...looks like it's time for patrol. I head down to the BatCave and find Tim and Damian already suited up. Damian has Tim in a chokehold. They are in the training area, but I've lived with them long enough to know that they aren't sparring.
"Drake, you're such an imbecile! There's no way that girl kissed you! You were just hallucinating."
"I was not! Why do you even have me in a chokehold? It's not like I stole something from you!"
"Yes you did! Autumn is mine! She was my friend first!"
"What?! You like her too? Well too bad! She kissed me, not you!"
"No, you dummy, but if I was there, she would have kissed me instead of you. I do not understand why any girl would want to show any affection towards you."
What the hell? Autumn kissed Tim? When did this happen?! Damian is jealous? Of Tim? This can't be right...
"WHAT?" I am so confused right now...
Tim and Damian look at me, and Damian releases Tim from the choke hold.
"SOMEONE KISSED YOU? AUTUMN KISSED YOU?"
"She didn't kiss Drake. He claims that she simply brushed his cheek with her lips. That's not a real kiss." Damian crosses his arms as he says this.
"Damian! She's not supposed to know!" Tim yells.
"Well it's too late for that now isn't it?" Damian glares at Tim.
Those two might end up fighting again... but I still can't believe someone kissed Tim! Damian's right...it doesn't exactly count, but this is huge for Tim!
"HOLY CRAP A GIRL KISSED YOU! CONGRATULATIONS!" I can't help myself. I run at him and give him a big hug.
I'm sorry, but I'm a hopeless romantic.
"Umm...thanks. Wait, did you just say holy crap?"
"Yes." I don't care at this point. "Tim! I thought you had a thing for blonds! That's why I set you up with Tiffany in your class! You should've told me you were into black-haired chicks!"
I also love matchmaking. I should try matching Damian up with someone... I'd better not tell him though.
"Well, not really, but I guess Autumn's pretty... Could you let go of me now?"
"Oh yea, sorry." I release him from my grip.
"Tt, so what if some girl kissed him. It's not like she will end up marrying Drake. Why would anyone?"
"Damian..." I glare at him. I believe that everyone has a soulmate out there in this great wide world.
Yea, I really am a hopeless romantic...
"Where's Bruce and Dick?" Why is Tim trying to change the subject? Oh well...might as well let him. I don't want to overwhelm him.
"Dunno. Still upstairs. I can go get them." I rush back up the stairs and enter the house. I go up one more flight of stairs and open the door to dad's room. Empty.
I walk a few more steps and I'm about to open the door when I hear voices.
"Dick, we need to talk."
A short silence.
"About what?"
"You and I both know…"
I lean my ear closer against the door.
"Look, dad...I...I'm sorry...I don't know what happened. I just…"
"No...it's my fault. You didn't fail Dick, you never failed. I did. As a mentor, as a father...it's my fault."
"But...I did! My parents...my sister, you! What if...what if I fail everyone I care about too?!"
Poor Dick...
"That won't happen, son. You didn't fail. None of you did. I was the only one that failed. I failed you, Tim, Jason, Damian, and Chris. I'm not…"
Poor Dad... Everyone around me is breaking down.
"No, dad! I failed! Autumn was right!"
"No. You can't allow yourself to believe her, because once you start believing her...you're letting her win."
At least Dad is becoming stronger against her mental manipulation.
"But…"
"She's blind, Dick. Don't be as blind as she is."
"But, dad...I…"
"It's okay. Just listen to me. You didn't fail, you're my son, you're strong. And I'm...I'm proud of you, Dick."
I wonder how hard it is for him to say that phrase...I'm proud of you...I've only heard him say it to me once in my entire life.
"I'm sorry."
Silence. They're probably hugging or something... I can't wait out here much longer. Should I tell them I overheard the conversation, or should I just pretend that I just got here? They're having a father-son moment. I should just pretend I happened to walk in at this time.
I open the door. "Dick, you in here?"
I find my big brother in a tight embrace with my father. My brother is starting to tear up. When I come in, they turn their heads in my direction and start to loosen their grips on each other.
"Hey! Group hug!" I run towards them with a foolish grin on my face and hug them both. I guess my plan to create a slightly happier atmosphere worked, because Dick let out a small laugh when I embrace them. I look up at Bruce and he's gently smiling at me.
My family would be depressing without me.
****Break****
Jason's POV
I blink myself into consciousness. The world is still turning and everything is still blurry, I can hardly feel my fingers, but I know where I am.
I'm at the house. It's not really home cause, I didn't grow up here. It also has that certain cold feeling as if a ghost is always watching.
I sit up on the soft bed and moan as the world spins.
I stand up and start stumbling towards the open doorway. I don't know how I even got here...all I remember is seeing Dick's face, then a dark stairway and, the rest is all blurry and muffled noises.
I stumble down the clean and neat hall down to the tech room. I open the door and find Autumn sitting on the swivel chair in front of the computer screens...deep in thought.
She turns around and I lean on the door.
"Wow, you up already?" She looks at me from head to toe. "You look like shit." She says and I roll my eyes.
"No kidding."
"You should go back to bed. Why'd you get out in the first place?" She starts moving towards me.
"I want to know what the hell happened." My voice is hoarse and my throat is dry.
"You don't remember?" I furrow my eyebrows trying to remember...then in an instant, I regret trying to remember.
Flashes of a mad man laughing in my face start to block my vision. There's red everywhere, and a crowbar, then an explosion.
The world tilts sideways and my head moves closer to the ground. My sister catches my collapsed body. "No, it couldn't have happened again...no...no...NO!" We fall on the floor.
"NO! NO! NO! NO!" I start to struggle as Autumn holds me with her smaller arms.
"Jason! Jason!" Her voice starts to become distant as I continue to yell.
"No!"
I start to punch the ground as Autumn is forced to let go. She just kneels on the floor in front of me, watching me lash out.
The memory repeats over and over again in my head. Some memories are when I was still 15, some memories were just about...a few weeks ago…
"NO! NO!" I don't know why I'm yelling. But the memory hurts...and having to relive it...it hurts more.
"I DIED! I DIED AGAIN! NOOO! I CAN'T! I COULDN'T HAVE! NO! I DIED!" I continue to punch the ground.
I put my hand on the wall that's next to me as I stare at the ground.
"Jason!" I haven't noticed that she stood up, but she puts her hand on my shoulder.
"Jason! Stop!" But I just yell the same thing.
"I DIED!" My knuckles start to hurt as they turn purple and black.
Suddenly, I push Autumn away, and she falls backwards to the ground. I know because I hear a loud thud and a crash.
I only continue to punch the floor. "I DIED! NO! NO! NO!" I yell the same thing over and over again.
Suddenly I feel smaller, warm arms wrap around me as my vision starts to become red. She just hugs me, and I can feel myself calming down. I stop punching the floor with my bruised knuckles.
"I died again…" I mutter as Autumn buries her face in my shoulder and hugs me tightly as I stare into nothing with wide eyes.
"No, you didn't die, not again. I couldn't let you big bro." She says.
Suddenly, I remember warm and gentle small arms help me out of the cold place.
"I...I'm...alone…sis" I mutter, remembering how cold I felt five years ago.
"No... I won't leave you alone Jase. I promise." I can hear her swallow a cry.
She hugs me tighter as if she's afraid to let go. "But...but...you have to promise...that you won't leave either, okay?" She says, choking in her own sob.
I slowly nod as I pull myself back into reality and I hug my little sister as well. "I promise." She sighs.
****Break****
I'm dreaming.
I'm in a house, it is only a one story house.
First is a living room, then I walk up the stairs and there is some kind of arch way. There is a white clean couch and a large TV in front of it, a glass door is next to the TV leading to the swimming area. Then after is a modern kitchen.
Just before the kitchen and after the couch is a huge hallway with multiple rooms.
It's the house.
I walk down the hallway and open one of the doors. I see a little girl training with a man. He seems to be forcing her to do push ups. I close the door and move on to the next one.
I see an older girl sparring with a boy her age, they seem to be sparring on top of a mountain. "Come on Dami! You can do better than that!" I close the door.
I go to the next door and find the same girl driving a large ship with her older allies yelling some things. I shut the door.
I go to another door and I open it. I find the same girl reading a book to a young boy. I close the door.
I open another one, and the same girl is holding her necklace as she talks to a woman. I close the door.
Then I'm pulled by gravity into a door that is color red at the end of the hallway.
The door opens on its own and I just fly in.
I'm in a different house, well it looks more like an apartment.
It's dark and cold, and crappy. It reminds me of my old home when I still lived with Catherine Todd.
I hear a woman crying in one of the rooms, I walk towards the wide open doorway and I peek.
There is a woman crying on her bed. Her world has seemed to change.
"WHY?" She yells.
She's asking God why…
"He's dead!"
Why her son has died.
I know because I can feel the whispers in my ear.
I get out of the room.
And move to the one next to it.
I open the shut door and go inside.
I can see the woman's only daughter crying. She can't sleep tonight.
I get out and close the door, and I leave the apartment and go back to the house.
The walls start to collapse, and everything falls.
The world becomes red and the face of the clown pops out of no where, laughing at my face.
I clench my teeth, and take the bomb that suddenly appears on the ground. I jump up and throw it in the clown's mouth. His face blows up and he disappears.
But...as I land on my two feet, I land on dead bodies. Dead bodies of my family. I can see, Dick, Tim, Christine, Damian, Barbara, Autumn, Alfred, and even Bruce's body on the ground.
'NO! NO!" The clown's laughter echoes around me.
"You did this! You did all of this!" I look around the fiery world, but I don't find him. "You did this!" He keeps on whispering.
Until I collapse and close my eyes.
And when I open them, I'm at a garden wearing my old Robin uniform. It's not tattered, broken, or bloody. It looks the same...my cape flying behind me. My mask still on, that R emblazoned on my chest. It looks all the same. With my black cape, and red suit, my long sleeves and my pants.
I look at my hands, and I'm back to being that twelve year old still learning how to do a flip. Then I look up and see Batman's face, smiling at me.
Then my clothes change. I'm wearing that large white dirty shirt and ragged pants. I drop the tire iron that just appeared in my hand and stare back up at Batman as we both stand in a dark alley.
He puts his hand on my shoulder. "It's time to come back home. For good." He says, and I look up at him and frown.
Then he disappears. I look to my left and see a nineteen year old me holding The Joker by his neck and throwing Batman a gun.
I can hear Bruce say. "I can't, I'm sorry, I just can't."
I look down. Then I open my eyes.