Ch.11

He was beginning to think that she was never going to come in, that he had terrified her to the point she resented him and didn't dare be in the same space as him. But just as Daryl was about to go outside and make sure she was even there, he heard the sliding doors clang shut, and he let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. He listened to her light footsteps walking from the bedroom out to the hallway, noting the lack of gasping breaths, which Daryl assumed meant she had quit crying.

He watched as she entered the dining room, pausing a few feet from him. Her eyes were red and watery; she looked as if she was going to fall apart any minute. Her eyes flashed to him for a fleeting second, and then without saying a word, she grabbed the clothes he had set out for her and retreated back into the bedroom. He remained sitting at the table until he heard the door open again. He went and grabbed his crossbow and the bag he would take with him to put supplies in.

"Daryl?" His back was turned to her, and her voice sounded fragile. "I-I started my period." It was hardly a whisper, and Daryl had almost missed it.

He could practically hear her embarrassment in her voice, but Daryl felt a rush of relief. Ever since they had found the cabin and he had had time to think, he had been worrying about Beth and whether she could get pregnant. He had wondered whether those men had had enough courtesy to use protection, but he couldn't bring himself to ask Beth.

"We're heading into town, we'll get ya' what you need."

There was a moment of silence, and then Daryl heard Beth speak again. "I'm sorry," her voice was brittle, like she was going to break down any moment.

Daryl turned to her, taking in how her head was looking down, eyes staring at the floor, her arms crossed over her chest, hugging herself tightly as if she were trying to hold herself together. "Don't be; ain't nothin' you can do about it." He made sure to make his voice soft, reassuring; he didn't want her to feel embarrassed over something she had absolutely no control over.

The drive into town was quiet, the only noise coming from the sound of the car. Beth had her head leaned up against the window, eyes staring straight ahead. Daryl made a point to glance over to her every few minutes to make sure she was still breathing; he had never known someone could be that silent.

After a half hour of driving they entered the town. It wasn't big, but it wasn't small either. He wasn't sure where the grocery store was, so he drove up and down the streets until he found it. He was amazed with how few walkers he saw. It was almost as if a dome had been placed over the neighborhood they were staying in and the adjacent town they were now visiting. He pulled the car into the parking lot and put it in park, turning it off.

When he got out of the car he paused for a moment, looking at Beth who hadn't seemed to notice they had stopped. She must have felt his staring eyes because she opened her car door and got out, following him up to the store. As was usual, he took his elbow and gave a few loud knocks on the glass doors. One walker came to the front, and Daryl easily took it down with one stab to the skull. He waited a few more moments before heading inside, motioning for Beth to follow.

He did a thorough, but fast sweep of the place. There had been two more walkers lingering towards the back of the store, but that was all. He wasn't surprised to see that the majority of the shelves had been ransacked, but there was still plenty for them to take with them.

"You get what you need, I'll get us some food and other supplies."

He knew she wouldn't want him to tag along as she went to the aisle she needed, and he was confident that he had taken all of the walkers in the place. She went to turn but Daryl stopped her by clearing his throat. He remembered that she didn't have a weapon, and even if he knew there weren't any walkers, he didn't want to risk a walker making its way in from outside and attacking Beth when she was defenseless. His hand came to meet hers and he wrapped her fingers around the handle of his knife.

"Just in case," he said.

He watched Beth and her faltering steps as she looked down the aisles, trying to find the one she needed. When he saw her disappear down one, he went off in search of whatever they may need. After a few minutes he made his way towards the aisle Beth had vanished down. He nearly ran straight into her as she rounded the corner. He heard the clank as the knife he had given her hit the floor; he was thankful she had dropped it and hadn't perceived him as a threat instead. He looked down to her hands and saw her holding a little box; he quickly turned away.

"I don't know where the bathroom is." Her face was turning red and her voice wavered when she spoke.

Daryl leaned down and picked up the knife. "Come one, it's this way."

Beth followed him as he led the way to the bathroom. He checked for walkers again before allowing her to go in. He stayed just outside the entrance until she came out.

Before leaving they gathered a few more items, splitting up to cover more ground faster. Daryl went down the aisle Beth had been down, knowing that she would eventually need more of what she had grabbed. He didn't really know what he was looking at. There were so many different brands and he didn't know whether she preferred pads or tampons. He absent-mindedly threw a few boxes into the bag and went to a different aisle. When he met up with Beth again he saw that she hadn't grabbed much, just a single box of granola bars and a few boxes of oatmeal. Thankfully Daryl had stuffed his bag full of all kinds of food.

By the time they got back to the house they were both exhausted. Daryl thought about eating something, but decided against it after he got out of the shower and realized how tired he actually was. Beth had already gone off to her room, having taken a shower just minutes before Daryl. Daryl paused outside of her room, listening to see if she was still awake, but he didn't hear anything, so he sauntered off to his room. His eyes were just beginning to close as he drifted off to sleep when he heard his door open and saw a small, shadowy figure standing in the doorway.

"Daryl?" It was a whisper said under her breath, but Daryl heard it.

"Yeah."

"Can I sleep in here tonight?" He could hear the pleading in her voice.

"Yeah."

Beth made her way over to the bed and Daryl slid over to make room for her, pulling the blankets back for her to get under. She was wearing the t-shirt that he had put her in their first night here. She nuzzled close against him, surprising him that she was so willing to be that close to another human, let alone a man. He could feel her spine through the shirt, and her hipbones were prominently sticking out. He knew she hadn't had anything to eat or drink since the day they were attacked by the group, only now did he realize the toll her starvation was taking on her body. He would need to get her to eat something tomorrow.

He was so consumed in his thoughts that he almost missed Beth talking. Her voice started in hushed tones, coming out slow, but as she continued talking the tears started flowing and her voice became ragged. Her body convulsed with the sobs and Daryl pulled her closer to him, not caring that he hadn't thought what his touch might do to her.

"I was so scared. I tried to fight back, but they were too strong. I tried to crawl away, but they were dragging me from you, and I couldn't stop them. And then he was on top of me, and I couldn't get out from underneath him. I tried to scream, but nobody could hear me, nobody could help me. And I felt him tear off my clothes, and I didn't know what to do. His hands were grabbing me and touching me and I couldn't push him away. It hurt so bad, and I just wanted it to stop, I prayed for it to stop, but it just kept going on. And then I saw a flower and focused on it, I tried to block it all out, but no matter what I did, no matter what I thought about, I could still feel him, I could still hear him. I wanted it all to stop, I wanted it to end."

He had thought about what had actually happened before, but hearing it from Beth, hearing her tell him what she had gone through, made everything seem so much worse, and he knew that that was because it was worse than anything he could have imagined. He hated himself for not being there for her when she needed him. He hated himself for not being able to keep his promise to Hershel. And he hated what those men had made Beth become; she was broken, the pieces scattered about, and he wasn't sure if she would ever be able to put those pieces back to together.

There was a moment where Beth stopped to catch her breath, her crying slowing but not stopping, and then she broke the silence again. "I should have fought harder. I should have done something different, I should have tried running. I should have been stronger." She paused again. "It's all my fault."

"No, no, it's not your fault. You can't think like that, Beth. There was nothing you could have done. You didn't deserve what happened to you. You fought hard, I know it. I'm proud of you. I promise that I will never let anyone hurt you again."

They remained like that; Beth curled into Daryl, Daryl holding her tight, until they fell asleep.

Author's Note: Thank the freezing cold temperatures for the update. I wasn't planning on posting anything today, but because the wind chill is -30 degrees classes got cancelled. giving me time to revise this chapter and start the next one!

So, I'm not sure if any of you were wondering, but we found out that Beth isn't pregnant. I wasn't going to address that issue in the story, but I figured that that would be a very real problem. And, Beth opened up to Daryl about what happened. Beth blames herself and Daryl hates himself, especially for breaking his promise to Hershel (or at least he thinks he broke it?). I thought the end of the chapter was pretty emotional.

Tell me what you think. And, if you are anywhere where the temperature is as cold as it is here, stay warm!