Chapter 12
Allegra couldn't believe she'd let herself be sucked in like this. Despite the frequent changes and skipping forward in time, she had settled in to playing out the scenes like a second take. In the beginning she had tried to change things, to walk away mid conversation, but nothing had worked. Now, she ignored the little voice telling her none of this was real and just played along like a good little puppet.
She was, however, finding it increasingly difficult to sleep. On this particular occasion Allegra had tried to settle until two-a.m., when the hot air in the dormitory became too much and she got out of bed. She suspected she could probably wonder the halls of the castle without much bother, seeing as doing anything out of character usually resulted in being ignored. She put on suitable clothing, just in case it turned out to be one of the times when the blue-tinted people did interact with her non-linear behaviour.
She walked aimlessly for half an hour and then found a balcony on the fourth floor to go out onto. The air was sharp, but almost warm for what Allegra thought was sometime between January and February. If she didn't ask for the date, she didn't often know. It also wasn't a particularly beautiful night; the sky was cloudy and a mist was sitting around the castle, but it beat watching the House Elves clean the common room. Allegra thought she could make out a light which she was sure was Hagrid's cabin. Nearby she could see the reflection of the castle on the lake and lights bouncing off greenhouse glass. She had tried to see Hogsmeade, but couldn't see a thing in that direction.
"You know, as a Prefect I ought to give you detention." Allegra swiveled on her heels and found Cedric standing behind her. She looked at him for a moment, trying to work out if this had really happened before or was something new, and then turned back around deciding it didn't matter.
"It's about two-thirty, you should give yourself detention."
"Touché." He walked up close behind her but didn't touch her. "You know that she's making it up - the things she's telling everyone."
"I'm sorry, but I don't know who you're talking about and I don't know what she's telling everyone."
"Come on, Allegra," he moaned, "despite what they say you are intelligent."
"What they say?" Allegra repeated, spinning to look at him. He smiled, pleased to finally have her full attention.
"Cho," he said in an it's-blatantly-obvious tone, "we've barely talked since the ball."
"Either have you and I." Allegra said simply, deliberately trying to be difficult.
"That's because you've told me not to get rid of her, because it would look bad if I ran off to you. I thought you hated her?"
Allegra shrugged, "I do, but I don't want to give everyone a reason to hate me, too." Cedric looked at her for longer than any friend would, and then sighed. He understood.
"I'm not enjoying this though."
"Well don't lead her on."
"I'm not!" he frowned, "I've been kissing you." Allegra smiled and turned her back to him. He stood for a moment and then moved to stand beside her. "So ... you don't want the whole relationship thing?"
"Do we need a label?" Allegra asked, "plus that would again ruin my letting Cho have you a while longer."
"So you do want to, at some point?"
"Of course," she smiled. He looked relieved. "We just have to time it right."
"And in the mean time?"
Allegra grinned, "we have fun."
Allegra pushed the door open angrily and walked into the room, glaring at the boy sat on one of the desks.
"Cedric?" she said, the door swinging closed behind her.
"Mhmm?"
"Why did you give me a detention?" she asked, her voice clear with warning.
"Because you were wandering the halls past curfew."
"And?"
"It's a good opportunity to be alone." He replied, a mischievous grin appearing as he edged towards her. She took a seat at one of the desks.
"Why an earth would I want that?"
"I think I have a pretty good idea." He flicked his wand and the door clicked.
Very little was said for the next forty minutes. And although Allegra didn't hate re-losing her virginity, she couldn't mute the alarm going off in the back of her head screaming that this was all going to be too much. Not because of what she was physically doing, because she thought that getting that close to him again as too good an opportunity to miss, but because she could feel it. All the pain and suffering that she had endured since June was being forgotten. She had fallen in love with the image in front of her. He felt, smelt, tasted and moved like Cedric. Nothing was out of place, nothing to remind her that this was not Cedric. Not really. Even if it was constructed from true memory, it was – not - him.
"Come on," he said once they were fully composed, "I told everyone it was only an hour long." He flicked his wand, took her hand and led her to the door.
"Hi Cedric!" Allegra heard the high-pitched squeal and knew the owner before she'd gotten out the door. Plus Cedric dropped her hand like it was hot. He was instead trying to keep his balance as Cho wrapped herself around his neck, her feet off the floor - the soles facing the ceiling."
"Hi, Cho." He managed to dislodge her.
"Some of the other Ravenclaws and I are having a party - what were you doing?"
"Detention," Cedric answered quickly. Cho nodded, clearly not surprised.
"Anyway, we're having a party and I wondered of you wanted to come?"
"Um, I think I have Prefect Du -" he caught Allegra's eye, "- Cho, I would love to go." He smiled at Allegra. Allegra rolled her eyes. Cho did not seem to notice the lack of eye contact and jumped him again.
"Great! I will meet you outside the Hufflepuff portrait in an hour!" She pranced off down the corridor. Cedric looked at Allegra and she raised an eyebrow at him.
"What? Jealous?"
"Not quite," Allegra smirked.
"Oh?"
"Well, first of all, you have to go to a party with Cho."
"Ah, we-"
"Second, that simply prolongs the time until we can be together in public."
"Ah," he had to pause again to say hello to a bunch of guys from his year who were walking past.
"And third," Allegra grinned once they were alone, "you have my lip gloss all over your face."
Cedric stood smiling for a moment before what she said registered and he began frantically wiping at his face with his sleeves.
"You know, you are so - so fucking lucky - none of them noticed." They looked at each other and laughed. "Do me a favour and never, never wear it again."
"I never have," she told him. He didn't hear her. "Well, have fun with Cho."
"Harry, I'm sure we can work it out, I know it's late but could you just recite it to me again?" Hermione asked Harry who was sat at a desk in the library, where he, Hermione, Ron and Allegra had been since dinner time. Three hours ago.
"Come see us where the voices sound, we cannot sing above the ground, and while you're searching ponder this: we've taken what you'll sorely miss, an hour long you'll have to look, and to recover what we took, but past an hour - the prospects black, too late, it's gone, it won't come back." Harry mumbled reluctantly, then banging his head against the table a few times for good measure. Hermione paced up and down thinking about what he could use to stay underwater for an hour.
"Gillyweed," Allegra told them for the hundredth time. Though of course, they didn't hear her. She and Ron were sat on the floor left of Harry's desk, their backs to the bookshelf. She was resting her head on Ron's shoulder, and he was resting his head on hers, both half asleep.
"Granger, Boone, Weasley. McGonagall has requested your presence in her office, now." Moody appeared and barked at them.
"But Harry needs -"
"Miss Granger, with the task no more than twelve hours away, I'm sure Mr Potter is more than ready for the second task, now go." Moody said, his fake eye looking at Harry who was still slumped on the table. "Longbottom!" He shouted, peering back around a bookcase, Allegra heard shuffling and footsteps and then a slightly worried looking Neville appeared.
"Yes, sir?"
"Help Harry put his books away," he said and Harry sat up, "Boone! Weasley!" Allegra jumped and realised Ron had fallen asleep. Moody started to growl.
"Ron, Ron, Ron!" She shook him and he eventually made a few spluttering noises and she managed to pull him up.
"Come on," Allegra said quietly, walking towards Hermione and off through the library.
"What's Harry going to do?" Hermione whispered, walking on Ron's other side and taking one of his arms to make sure he kept going.
"He'll work it out, Hermione."
"What d'you think McGonagall wants with us?" she asked.
"No idea," Ron said.
When they got to McGonagall's door they found Gabrielle Delacour who seemed to have arrived with no explanation as well.
"Shall we knock?" she asked.
"Yeah, we better," Hermione said, and pushed through to knock herself. The wooden door opened and McGonagall peered around.
"Ah, good you're all here. Everyone come in but Allegra, could you go and fetch Mr Diggory for me? Thank you." The other three students were ushered into the office and the door was closed, giving Allegra no advice on how to retrieve him, or from where. Luckily for Allegra, this was the second time she had done this, so she knew exactly where he was.
When she arrived at the Hufflepuff portrait Hannah Abbott was there about to say the password.
"Hannah?"
"What?" she snapped.
"Could you go and get Cedric Diggory for me, please?"
"Why?"
"Because Professor McGonagall would like to see him."
Hannah eyed her suspiciously for a moment, "fine." She went in through the portrait. Allegra leaned against the wall opposite and waited.
Ten minutes later he appeared.
"Allegra?"
"How long does it take for you to walk to the door?"
"I was in the shower."
"Of course you were," Allegra sighed. "Come on, McGonagall wants us."
"Us? Why would she want us?"
"No idea," Allegra said before she could help it, she really had every idea.
Once back at the office they knocked of the door and McGonagall opened the door. There was no sign of the others.
"Sorry it took so long," Allegra said, "it wasn't easy, not knowing where he was, and all."
"Come in," she smiled. They stood awkwardly in front of her desk. McGonagall took her seat.
"I am about to discuss something that you must not tell anyone. The second task is tomorrow, that I am sure you are ready for, Cedric, and within the test you must retrieve something you care about. That much I am sure you both will have gathered," they nodded.
"That something will be a person. I have been responsible for this, and I have used a spell to find out who the Champion cares about most from those on the Hogwarts grounds."
Allegra felt the greatest urge to look at Cedric, but resisted. McGonagall placed her elbows on the desk and laced her fingers together.
"There really weren't any surprises, Harry's was Ron, Fleur and Gabrielle are sisters, Hermione and Viktor - she was his date to the Yule Ball." She looked at them for a moment longer than comfortable. "With you Cedric, it wasn't so simple. Now, I have absolutely no right to pry into your private lives, but I don't want to pick the wrong person and embarrass anyone. As a teacher we hear a lot of gossip, and a popular topic has been Cedric and Cho, the girl he also took to the Yule Ball." McGonagall was beginning to look as uncomfortable as Allegra felt. "I expected Cho to be the name to appear, however, it was Allegra's." The room fell deathly quiet. When neither Allegra nor Cedric breathed, McGonagall sighed. "Would you like it to be Allegra or Cho?"
"Cho," Allegra and Cedric said.
"Right," McGonagall nodded, "Allegra, you are not to speak of what you know to anyone. Nor you, Cedric. You are both dismissed. Good luck for tomorrow, Cedric."
"Thank you, Professor," he said sheepishly, and pushed Allegra out through the door. They walked quickly towards the staircase.
"That was ... revealing," Allegra said with a pained expression.
"Awkward, embarrassing, bazaar." Cedric nodded. They stopped and looked at each other. Allegra grinned. "I'm number one."
Cedric smiled, "apparently so." They walked up to the fourth floor and stopped to say goodbye. The halls were deserted. "Good luck kiss?"
"I can manage that."
Three days. Three days and then he would be gone, again. Allegra was not ready, not prepared, and she was starting to panic.
"Hermione," Allegra said nervously. "There's something I have to tell you about."
"What is it?" Hermione was more concerned than Allegra had wanted, but she had to ignore it.
"I've been seeing someone."
"That's good, isn't it? Why do you seem upset?"
"Well, first because I haven't told you about it at it started at Christmas and second because, well, it's Cedric." Hermione's jaw dropped to the floor.
"I thought he was with Cho?"
"Well, sort of, but not really. He wants to end it but I told him to leave it for now."
"What? That doesn't sound like you." Hermione sat down next to Allegra on her bed.
"He's never really been that interested in her, but she was so into it and it was Christmas Eve when we first kissed. Imagine Hermione, one of the Champions dances with one girl and the next day some other girl has him on her arm leaving the first girl in the dust. The hate would be incredible."
Hermione nodded sympathetically, "at least you are avoiding that."
"So far," Allegra said, "only you and Professor McGonagall know, unless Ced has told someone."
"Professor -?"
"Long story," Allegra dismissed. They sat in silence for a moment.
"So ... do you really like him that much?"
"What do you mean, that much?"
"Well you've been sneaking around everyone for this guy, for six months. I can't imagine you'd make that much effort for someone you didn't really really like."
Allegra shrugged, "I haven't thought of it that way."
Allegra had had boyfriends before Cedric, but he was the first one who really made an effort and needed an effort in return. Allegra had always been very laid back about her relationships, and often didn't stick around long enough to have to get through any rough patches. It had never been worth it. But Cedric was different ... they had argued from the very beginning. She was complicated and he liked that. She had never met anyone who made her realise her complexities and love her for them, other than her friends, of course.
After Cedric ... well they hadn't made it to point where they would have been a couple in public. Hermione knew, and that was it. She helped her when she could but the rest of the time Allegra had to grieve in private. As far as everyone else knew, they had just been friends. Not much more than acquaintances.
There was nothing else for her to do than ride it out again. No way to hide or skip through. She would sit, watch, and work her way out of whatever hell this was.
"Allegra?" Hermione was at the dorm door and had opened it to a small blonde second year, who was blinking at her.
"Yes?"
"Cedric Diggory is outside, he says he needs to talk to you."
"Do you know why?"
"No," the girl looked sheepish, "but he said I have to hex you if you don't go... but I don't think I will." Hermione smiled her, thanked her for the message and closed the door.
"I thought you were keeping it private?"
"I did, too!" Allegra said, clearly irritated.
"He's not doing a very good job."
"He doesn't care, that's half the problem," Allegra almost growled, and marched her way downstairs and out of the door. He was peering over the bannister.
"You beckoned." The door swung shut behind her. Cedric turned around and looked up and down to check they were alone.
"Can we talk?"
"I don't know, I'm not sure you can break up with me when we're not actually together."
"Not that type of talk," he sighed.
"Will there be talking?"
"What? - oh - yes - I mean ... can we just -"
"Shall we go outside? To the lake?" Cedric smiled and they did just that.
"So you didn't just want to talk about the tournament, presumably." Allegra asked after letting Cedric talk himself out.
"No," he breathed, "I ... I like you."
"I would hope so."
"Allegra," he said, "please, let me -"
"Okay, I'll not be me for ten seconds." Cedric looked at her, that was not what he meant.
"I like you, and I don't want to hide it." Allegra stared out at the lake. "We are essentially together as it is, only we have to creep around and not tell anyone ... it's frustrating. I'm talking to someone and I will go to tell an anecdote, and have to stop myself because it involves you. My friends know that something is up, because they know I'm into someone and that person is definitely not Cho."
This time Allegra didn't say anything because she was too busy thinking.
"So," he continued, "I'm going to break up with her tomorrow, before the final task."
"No," she said quickly, "after the task."
He wasn't keen, that much was on his expression but he held it back, "okay, after the task. But then I'm doing it - not that I remember us ever having a formal conversation about us being in a relationship - and then I am coming for you."
"Menacing."
"I meant it to be." He grinned.
On the morning of the final task the reality of everything hit Allegra like a punch in the stomach, leaving her queasy and winded. It was just fourteen hours until Cedric died, or at least, this version of him. Allegra tried to consciously pick out any visuals that proved to her that this place was not real, but she was having a hard time. Apart from all the blue, which her eyes had almost adjusted to, everything was pretty spot on. Including Ron and Hermione's arguments. They were sitting opposite each other at the Gryffindor table, Harry sat to Ron's right and staring intently at his cereal bowl.
"You know, as hard as you stare, I'm not sure you can tell the future in milk, but you would have to check with Trelawney on that." Harry looked up, relief and thanks written all over his face.
"Allegra, honestly!" Hermione snapped, suddenly turning to her. Allegra jumped in fright, and Harry looked as though he would have fallen off the bench had she been talking to him.
"What?"
"You are honestly going to make yourself ill! You don't come to bed until after we've all gone to sleep, you wake up early and go for runs, it's making you ill!" Ron made a comment and they went back to arguing between themselves.
"That was odd," Allegra smiled at Harry.
"Four-hundred and sixty-seven," Allegra said to herself, happily, jumping on the spot.
"What?" someone chuckled.
"That's the number of floor tiles from the Gryffindor common room to here," she smiled innocently at Cedric.
"Shall we go, then?" he offered her his hand.
"Ced, no offense, but I don't think so." He looked offended. "You think it would be a good idea to hold hands with me before you've broken up with Cho?"
"... point taken." He dropped his hand and pushed them inside his sweats. They found a place behind the Champions tent that was well hidden to say good luck, or this time around: goodbye.
"This will have to be quick as we usually have a talk on tactics with Dumbledore but -" Allegra pulled him into a passionate kiss. "- right," he smiled breathlessly. "I just - well ... this will sound ridiculous considering - but this is dangerous - something may happen to me - basically, I love you."
"DIGGORY!" someone bellowed from inside the tent and they both looked towards the noise.
"I have to go," he kissed her quickly, "see you when I get back." His grip pulled out of hers before she could try to hold on, and then he was gone.
"Cedric!" Cho shrieked, "Good luck, babe!"
"Yeah, err, thanks," Allegra heard him reply. Allegra managed to drag herself to the bleachers to Ron and Hermione who were sitting and looking worried. Hermione gave Allegra's knee a comforting squeeze as she sat down.
The atmosphere was electric, just as it had been that day, but Allegra didn't get the feeling of excitement that she had had then. This time there was nothing but pain, she couldn't focus, her vision was blurry and her hearing muffled.
One - cheers erupted as Fleur arrived back, she shrugged as if to say she tried and went to sit with the other girls from Bauxbatons.
Fleur screamed, Hermione gasped and buried her head into Ron's shoulder and he made sure to obscure her view, then he reached for Allegra's hand and pulled her in close with them, but she stared.
Two - loud manly shouting exploded as Viktor appeared, also unsuccessful. He bowed and went to where the Durmstrang students were seated.
Harry sobbing was so raw that it wrenched at Allegra's gut, he clutched at Cedric's lifeless body.
It was late, people were murmuring. They should have been back by now.
Three - Allegra wouldn't look, she heard a thump, cheering, sobs and a scream. Allegra managed to find her feet this time, she vaulted out of her seat and through the stands. Tears streamed freely down her face and she landed next to his body, taking his lifeless hand in hers so full of warmth, and Harry latched onto her. Allegra felt something in Cedric's hand, she picked it out and looked down at a folded piece of paper. Tears froze on her face as she studied it, wondering what it was. She used that one hand to slowly open the note, but as she straightened out the first fold, she noticed a change. She paused and didn't move, simply listening.
It was quiet.
Silent, eerie and still. This was not how it had been. She looked across to where Cedric's father had been sobbing on his knees, but now all she could see was his old brown leather shoes and black trousers. She looked up to find him looking back down at her. She stood up and his eyes followed her up. His eyes were black and hollow, the whites had disappeared. As the two pairs of eyes met, black to green, the sky darkened. A cold wind picked up around her feet, throwing her hair around her face. A flash of dry lightning and a clap of thunder echoed through the quiet. Amos Diggory raised his arm and pointed at her.
"YOU KILLED HIM!" he boomed in a voice that was not his own. Allegra stumbled back a step and broke her gaze with him. She looked around the stadium and saw that everyone else looked like him. Black eyes, stony faces, pale angry complexions.
"YOU KILLED HIM!" he shouted again, dropping his hand into his pocket. Allegra didn't have to think about it, a shield flashed into appearance around her, meeting the oncoming spells with deafening booms. Her left hand wrapped tightly around the note and the wind whipped violently at it as though trying to take it back.
Her next reaction which came just in time, was to run. She turned on her heels and ran as fast as she could out of the stadium, around the edge and down the hill. She slipped and skidded down the side of the hill with one leg out in front of her, but managed to stay upright. She leapt daringly off the side of the hill and landed awkwardly, but didn't stop for a damage check. She carried on, running out and away from Hogwarts.
She guessed that, quite obviously, the memories period of this hell was over, she was faced with a decision. What the hell to do now?
Ahead, she spotted a particularly rocky area of mountain that didn't look impossible to reach. It would offer shelter, a vantage point in which to see anything coming for her, and a moment to read the note. She climbed up carefully picking her way, aware that although no one had come after her it didn't mean that they wouldn't. She found an area where the rocks had created a bowl with half a roof. She arranged herself under the stone ledge and with one eye on what she was doing and one on her surroundings, she straightened out the paper. As she read the scrawled words her mouth dropped open and her other hand covered it in shock. She read it over again.
From behind the veil you came
Your love for me burned like a flame
So here I am, to help you out
Because obviously I cannot shout.
A similar place you must go
Somewhere buried far below.
I miss those lips that made me fly,
I just had to have my final goodbye.
I love you, remember that,
You will find your way back.
Again and again Allegra read those words. She didn't know if it was real, how he knew, how he wrote it, or how any of it was at all possible, but she was going to sit under that rock until she knew where he was talking about. But that he had known, was all that mattered.