"I guess what scares me the most now is the thought that I won't be able to protect you"
― Julia Hoban, Willow

I just sat there and stared at Carole, my mouth gaping open. Fire was spreading all over my body, and I cursed the fact that my pale skin revealed my every emotion. "Excuse me?"

Her skin was as red as mine, which provided marginal comfort. "You heard me. Because it's too soon for him to be thinking about sex, and I know he'll do if he thinks it will make you happy."

She was right. One of Finn's greatest faults and more charming traits was that he desperately wanted to please everyone, all the time. I could see him sleeping with me just because he was so afraid that I would leave him if he didn't. "I wouldn't ask him if I didn't think he was ready. I've only kissed him one time, so it's too early for me to think about it, too."

"I wish I didn't have to worry about this, but I do. You understand, right? This isn't more then just being safe and sure. It's about respecting both his body and yours, and, unfortunately, the majority of that is going to fall on you. Finn might know what he wants, but I'm not sure that he has any idea what to do now that he has it." A slight smile tugged at her lips. "Actually, I'm not sure that he's ever known what to do once he has it."

"I love him." The words came out soft, but sure. "I know that he doesn't love me back, at least not yet, but I do love him. I want him to be happy."

That wasn't the right thing to say. It as true, but it was just wrong. But that was what always happened when I tried to verbalize my feelings for Finn. There was something between us that I couldn't quite get my finger on, even in my own mind, which made it impossible for me to explain it to anyone else.

If there was one thing I respected about Carole, it was that she didn't try to offer me false comfort. Maybe there was a time when she would have, but after this summer, she knew that any member of our strange, broken, little family would see right through to the lie.

So instead of telling me that of course Finn loved me, or even that he would definitely grow to love me in time, she nodded. "Love is like that."

"Were you happy with Finn's dad?" The question blurted out before it was fully formed in my brain, something that almost never happened. "I mean…you know, that was rude. You don't have to answer it."

She was quiet for so long that I was suddenly sure that she going to accept my out and ignore the question. Then she turned to study me with eyes that were nothing like her son's, except for the guarded quality lurking in their depths. "Are you asking me if I was happier with Christopher then I am with your father, or are you just asking out of curiosity?"

Until she asked, I hadn't been aware of it, but, yes, what I was really asking was whether or not she was happier with my father or some other man. I loved her, but not like I loved Dad, and I didn't want him to have to live in some other mans shadow.

You should know what that feels like. You're already living in Puck's shadow, and you'll be there for a very, very, long time, if not forever.

There was nothing to say to that, because it was the truth. Finn was coping, and he was healing, but until he figured out a way to accept his loss completely, Puck would always be there, an invisible presence. Not that I thought there had been anything sexual between them, but Puck was still haunting us.

I squirmed, suddenly wishing that I had told Finn that I didn't want to come today. "The first one, I guess."

"Then the answer is no. What I had with Chris was passionate and wonderful, but not exactly the sort of love that lasts forever. I was just too young and blind to see it at the time."

There was more to this story then she was telling me, but I guessed I had already heard the important part. "Do you still miss him, even after all this time?" A little less then 16 years, if my calculations were correct.

"I've missed Chris for longer then he's been dead. Had things not turned out the way they did, it would have ended up as ugly as one of the celebrity divorces you like reading about in the magazines. Screaming, lawyers, dirty laundry being flung all over the place." She was talking more to herself them me now, and I was hanging on her every word. To hear Finn tell it, his parents marriage had been storybook perfect, but that wasn't the story I was hearing right now.

I don't know why that surprises you. You remember your parents marriage the same way. Daddy worked at the garage, Mommy stayed home and baked cookies and read stories when you were little. Then you went to school and Mommy was always ready with a snack and to help you with your homework. At 6 on the dot, Daddy came home, smelling like oil, and the three of you ate dinner together every single night. Daddy always greeted Mommy with a kiss, and they never, ever fought. Is that really how it was?

Yes. No. If I was being completely honest with myself, I wasn't sure. Not only did I not have solid memories of my parents interacting, my memories of my mother at all were fading year by year. Where it had been so easy to picture her face even two years ago, I now had to resort to looking at photographs. The only memories I had left were vauge and blurry, just snippets of her voice, or the way her perfume had smelled.

Next to me, Carole abruptly sat up, startling me out of my reflections. "But that doesn't matter now. Even if that had happened, he gave me Finn, and I could forgive him anything in the world as long as I have my boy."

"Finn is special." It was all I could think to say, but it seemed like the most important thing in the world.

"Yes, he is. So, to answer your question, I was happy with Chris, and I loved him, but loving someone isn't always going to be enough. Sometimes that love stays, sometimes it goes. That's why I want you to be careful with both Finn's heart and your own. Because everyone both of our families have had enough loss to fill a lifetime."

I hated myself for what I was about to ask, but I couldn't help it. "Are you going to leave?"

Again, she didn't lie. She knew as well as I did how quickly someone could disappear, willing or not. "I hope not."

A silence settled then, but not an awkward one. It was just a quiet that said we didn't need to say anything to each other, because it had already been said. I took a magazine out of my satchel (man-purse, whatever.) and flipped through it, catching myself up on the latest trends.

Suddenly Carole looked at her watch. "Kurt, did you eat this morning?"

I was deep into an interview with Zac Efron, so I just nodded reflexively. "Mm-hmm."

"Kurt, are you lying to me?" She was using that Mommy-tone, the one that told me she already knew the answer.

I gave her a guilty look. "Yes. But we're having lunch really soon, so it will be fine." Ever since Coach Sylvester had told me that I had hips like a pear, I didn't mind skipping a meal every now and then.

Or every day.

I didn't skip meals every day! Especially now that Finn was back and willing to take over some of the cooking responsibilities. Who would have actually thought that Finn Hudson would be able to cook something that not only didn't give anyone food poisoning, but was actually edible?

"No, it won't be fine. You don't eat enough, Kurt, and it worries me. Besides, lunch is at least four hours away, and you haven't had anything since last night." She pulled me to my feet. "Let's go."

There was no arguing with a woman, especially a mother, when she thought that she was right. But I had to at least try, for my own pride if no other reason. "But Finn…"

"Will be in there for the next three hours at least. And if he gets out and we're not sitting right here, he knows to go find Mr. Shuester and wait for us. We had to make sure that there were at least two escape plans for him."

Damn she was good. "I can't eat a full meal now and a full meal in just a few hours. I'm not Finn; my stomach just doesn't hold that much." Even as I spoke, I was letting her drag me down the hallway.

"Then you don't have to eat that much. I'll take you for a coffee and a muffin, how does that sound?"

See, now she was doing that thing where it sounded like she was asking me for my opinion, but she really wasn't. If I said what I wanted to, which was 'too fattening and full of the bad sort of calories', she would counter by taking me somewhere where I would end up at a diner eating eggs and toast, which were far worse in the calorie department. Not to mention the only coffee choices would be black and black. So I gave her my best and least fake smile. "It sounds good."

Which was how I found myself sitting in a coffee shop 15 minutes from the school, nibbling on a bran muffin and trying to explain to Carole exactly why I needed her to convince Dad to give me an extra $300 to redecorate the basement. She wasn't exactly buying my arguments, not matter how cute I made myself look. "Didn't you get $300 from your father to decorate the night Finn and I moved in?"

"That was for Finn. I'm trying to get some money for me, so I can do some painting, or possibly wallpaper it this time."

She wasn't fooled for a second. "If I recall correctly, you ended up with that money, since you claimed that Finn wouldn't know what to do with it. Since I haven't seen any renovations going on down there, I'm going to assume that you still have it. Or are you trying to tell me that you need an additional $300, for a total of $600?"

"I don't have that money any more." And please, please, let her not ask where that money had gone. The truth was way too embarrassing.

Like a humiliation-seeking missile, she zeroed in on me. "That was earmarked for renovations. If you decided that there was something more important then fixing up the basement, then you have a problem. And, since you're so interested in sharing, you probably owe Finn $150."

I picked at my muffin. "I guess." I cursed the fact that tears were threatening again. I had always been a bit of an easy crier, which was part of the reason that I had been the target of bullies since before I had any idea what gay meant. "I can get it for him, I promise."

Just like her son, Carole could never stand to see someone upset. "Are you in trouble? Is that where the money is?"

I shook my head, watching in a detached way as I crumbled the muffin into a mess of ruined dust. Of course I was in trouble, just not the sort she meant. I was in trouble because I was in love with a boy who wasn't the boy I had fallen in love with at all, but an alternate version of himself. I was in trouble because I was going to be a junior in a school that hadn't changed at all, even though I wasn't the same person that I had been the last time I stood in its halls. I was in trouble because…well, because I was Kurt Hummel, and trouble had followed me since I was a little kid. "The money's gone."

Something about the way she looked at me told me that I could tell her the rest. "Can you promise not to tell Dad?" At her nod, I whispered the rest. "I couldn't keep the money. You were right, it was Finn's money, and I took it, and every time I looked at it, or the walls, I felt guilty. So I split it in half and put half in the box at the church, and the other half in the box at Puck's synagogue. I mean, if there is a God, and I'm not saying that I believe there is, because I don't, maybe he'd give Finn two chances instead of one." There it was, the most humiliating and least rational thing I had done since I had let Mercedes talk me into wearing her neon zebra stripes out in public. I blamed grief and guilt for both of those extremely out of character actions.

"It worked." Her voice was quiet, but I still couldn't look her in the eyes.

"No it didn't. Finn got out of there on blind luck, not because some mystical cloud Daddy decided to let him live." Now that that moment was over, I refused to revisit it again. Ever.

"Well, in this particular instance, I suppose I could make the case to your father that charitable contributions tend to be tax-deductable, and you were giving the money to charity. I'm not making any guarantees, but I can try my best."

There were times when it was nice to have more then two people in the house, so we could try and pull the old two against one on Dad. "That would be very nice of you."

She nodded tightly, and I wondered what she was actually thinking. "Are you going to eat the rest of that muffin, or just crumble it into sand?"

"I'm too nervous to eat. If Finn doesn't pass, it's going to crush him."

"Finn will pass. He's passed every year so far, and that's without your helping him. Thank you again for that, by the way. I try, but he takes it so much better when it's coming from you."

Deep down, I was pleased that she had noticed. "It's no trouble."

"We both know that that isn't true, but I'll let it go for now." She consulted her watch and phone, trying to determine how much time we had left. "Do you mind tagging along on a few errands?"

I had a sense that Carole, despite her brave words, was as nervous as I was. "Ok."

I had never run errands with Carole before, and, as it turned out, shopping with Carole was very different then shopping with Dad. When he ran errands, he meandered from store to store, never having a list, and forgetting half of what he needed. Then I would be forced to put skim milk in my coffee instead of the nonfat flavored creamer I really wanted.

Carole shopped like a woman on a mission. Lists were consulted, prices compared, and the creamer with a slight taste of mint was put in the cart. Once the groceries were bought, we stopped by the post office, then the bank. I made sure to pick up two lollipops for Finn out of the dish by the tellers station. Green, always green. I thought for a second and snatched a hard candy as well. The teller glared, and I gave her my best bitch glare back.

My phone vibrated in my pocket, telling me I had a text. I flipped it open, reading Finn's note.

Ware r u? Im done.

"Carole, Finn's finished." While I spoke, I was texting Finn back.

Bank. We'll be back in 15 minutes or so.

I was working on Finn using some proper grammar when he texted, though I was starting to suspect it was a lost cause.

Get me a lolipop?

His spelling could use a little work as well, but there was plenty of time to worry about that later. If Finn was asking for a treat, he must be feeling pretty good about his performance.

Already done. Two green lollipops and a butterscotch candy. Acceptable?

U Rock.

I smiled at the phone, even though I knew that he couldn't see it. I did rock, didn't I? 'Carole? Did you hear me?"

"Almost done. He'll be fine for a few minutes" She was fussing with the checkbook and not looking in my direction.

It sounded a little harsh, but it was a necessary thing. If Carole babied Finn by rushing to him the minute he asked for her, she would only hamper him in the long run. She had to show a little faith in him.

I, meanwhile, was about to have some sort of nervous event. What if Finn needed something, and choked up with his talking? Or, worse, what if Coach Sylvester got a hold of him?

By the time we made it back to the school, I was all but having a full on panic attack. Carole nudged me quickly. "I have paperwork to finish with so he's all set up for the tutor. You go find Finn and meet me back here in a little bit"

Considering that the school was deserted and Finn was supposed to find Mr. Shue, I wasn't terribly concerned about being able to locate him. At least I wasn't until I searched around and found both the choir room and the auditorium empty. Where else could they be? I fired off a quick text, asking where he was.

Teachers Longe

Sure enough, there he was, nibbling on a bag of Doritos while he went over a sheet of music with Mr. Shue. I stomped a foot. "Finn Hudson! We are going to eat in less then a half hour, do you really need to be porking bags and bags of Technicolor sawdust right before?"

Finn bounded to his feet, racing over to give me an enthusiastic hug. He acted like he hadn't even heard my rant, which was par for the course with Finn. "You were right, the test was really easy."

I raced a hand up his side, hitting the ticklish spots and making him twist away. "I'm glad. What are the two of you up to?"

Like a marionette with its strings cut, Finn collapsed over the table, hiding whatever he was doing. "Nothing much. Just some stuff that we'll maybe do in Glee."

Aw, Finn has a little crush! Haven't you waited years for some boy to get caught doing a special little project for you? To stutter and stammer and be embarrassed because he loves you so much he wants you to wait until it's perfect for you to see it?

I absolutely had. I also understood what it was like to have a project interrupted before it was finished, when it still looked like nothing but a huge mess. So I backed up up a little, giving Finn a chance to slide what he was working on over to Mr. Shue. "We need one more person, probably a guy, right?"

Both Mr. Shue and I were too surprised to reply immediately, causing Finn to look from one face to the other, confused. "Right? Now that Puck is dead, we need one more guy." He started ticking off on his fingers. "Me, Kurt, Artie, Mike, Matt, Santana, Rachel, Mercedes, Tina, Brit, Quinn. That's 11 and we need twelve."

"Y-yes, Finn, that's right." Mr. Shuester was trying to regain his equilibrium.

"How come you're looking at me like that? It's not hard to count to 11." Then realization dawned. "Oh. You know, we don't always have to not talk about Puck. I know he's dead, and it makes me sad, but it's ok. It's not like I'm going to have meltdown if I hear his name."

"That's good to know. Did you have someone else in mind for joining Glee?" Mr. Shue was watching Finn, his expression gentle.

"Not really." He squinted. "The whole club is kind of a piranha thing. No one really wants to join. No offense." He started gathering up his stuff.

Mr. Shue and I exchanged looks over his head. He mouthed 'piranha?' at me, and I shrugged. It was hard to tell sometimes if Finn had no idea what he was talking about or if he was just misusing a word. "Finn? What sort of club is this?"

"Piranha. You know, no one wants to go anywhere near it? I guess it's because they bite." Now he looked confused as well.

"Pariah." Mr. Shue snapped his fingers. "I think you mean, pariah, Finn. Though piranha might work here as well."

Finn perked up instantly. "Piranha, pariah, same thing. But maybe someone will transfer in from a school where Glee is actually cool. Or from, like, Siberia or something. Do they sing in Siberia?"

Fortunately, Mr. Shuester was saved from having to reply by Carole poking her head in the room. "Boys? Are you in here?"

"Yep!" Finn jumped up to lay his head on her shoulder. "I finished really early, so Mr. Shue said I could come in here and help him. Did you know they have a coke machine in here? I knew that they were hiding all the good stuff where the kids can't get it."

"Honey, teachers require something in return for putting up with students all day long. Did you double check all of your answers?" She waved to Mr. Shue.

"Uh-uh. Kurt said not to."

Carole shot me a look, which I countered with a shrug. "He does better when he doesn't second guess himself. If I let him go back when we study together, he gets convinced that he got it wrong the first time, then he changes his correct answer to the wrong one. He knows this stuff; he just gets confused and over thinks it."

"If you think so…" Her tone suggested that she didn't believe me, but what was done was done, whether or not she agreed with me.

"I do." Finn reads slowly, and his comprehension leaves a bit to be desired, but he usually gets there in the end. His issue was that he knew his comprehension was poor, so he doubted not only his answer, but that he had even read the problem correctly in the first place. And don't even get me started on his math. There were days when I wasn't completely sure Finn knew what all of his numbers looked like, much less what to do with them when he got them figured out. There were some days when he had me so confused that I started to think Finn was normal and I was the one with the learning problem.

"Mr. Shue? Can we finish this up later?" Finn was puppy-hopeful. "We're going to lunch."

Mr. Shue waved him off amiably. "Go on, Finn. I'll see you in two weeks, unless you want to come over before."

"I have to, so we can finish our..." He stole a quick glance over at me, clearly trying to figure out what to say. "You know, thing."

Subtlety, do not meet Finn Hudson. Still, it was cute as could be and I found myself smiling a little. "Where do you want to eat, Cowboy?"

"The deli!" Finn jumped up, cheerful as ever. "I can get a club and you can get whatever that salad-y thing is."

"It's just a regular Caesar salad, Finn, not a salad-y thing." I couldn't keep the affection out of my voice. He was so cute.

"Salad, salad-y, whatever." He rolled his eyes, and, for a second, he looked so much like the old Finn that my heart gave a quiet lurch. "It's still shrubbery."

I wanted to kiss him, but this was neither the time nor the place for that. "Well, Finn, when they remove 47 pounds of impacted meat from your colon surgically, you'll wish that you'd eaten a little more 'shrubbery' yourself."

He turned to Carole and Mr. Shue, both of whom were watching us with bemused expressions. "Is that true? Can that really happen?"

"I heard that that happened to John Wayne, but that might have just been a rumor." Mr. Shue gave me a quick wink, one that made me smile. He was actually pretty cool, at least some of the time.

"Oh. Maybe I'll eat some shrubbery, too." He sounded a little nervous.

I let him stew in his own nerves for a few more seconds, but finally had to chuckle. "It's ok, Finn, that won't really happen. It's a total urban legend."

He seemed to accept that, his dark eyes becoming less nervous. "Oh, good." His voice faded to a soft grumble while he groped around for his things. "Food, food, food, food. Hey, where's my backpack?"

I was starting to suspect that there was nothing in this world that would improve Finn's organizational skills. Mr. Shue rested his forehead in his hand. "You didn't come in with a backpack, Finn. Did you leave it in the classroom you tested in?"

"Probably." Finn shrugged like it was no big deal. "I'll go get it." Then he was gone, his sneakers echoing down the empty hallway.

Carole gestured at the hall. "Kurt?"

I got it; go follow Finn so the grown-ups can talk. I gave her a quick nod and stepped out into the hallway, pulling the door most of the way closed behind me. Then I stopped, my ear pressed to the gap.

Mr. Shue spoke first. "He's doing a lot better."

It was nice to hear someone else confirm what I had already suspected. Finn was better. Not perfect, maybe not even great, but better. Mr. Shue kept going. "He's still wanting to be very close to me, and he didn't really like it when Emma came in to chat, but he held his ground. We might just get him back into school by January."

No one thought we could do it for the beginning of the year. Not Dad, not Carole, not Mr. Shue. And, if I was going to be honest here, I didn't either. If Finn wasn't ready, then he wasn't ready.

"I almost don't want him back in school." Carole's voice was much softer then his. "There are days when I don't even want to leave him with Kurt or Burt, even though I knew either one of them would lay their life down for him, no questions asked. But the three of us weren't enough last time, so how can we be enough to keep him safe now? He's the safest at home, but if I let him know that, I'll never get him out the door again."

"He'll be safe here. He'll have 10 pairs of eyes looking out for him, in addition to mine. When he's ready, we'll take good care of him. But I understand that-"

"Are we listening in on them?" Finn's mouth was suddenly right at my ear as he whispered, and I had to clamp a hand over my mouth to keep from screaming.

I pushed him gently and whispered back. "You about gave me a heart attack!"

"Sorry." Since he was so close anyway, he gave me a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"Finn, we can't do that in public." Even if it was a fight not to shiver.

"No one can see. What are they talking about?"

I wasn't sure if I wanted him to hear what was being discussed. "Stuff."

He nodded. "Me, huh?"

Did any of us ever talk about anything else these days? "Yep."

"Good stuff or bad?" He leaned his ear against the door. "They aren't saying anything now."

As it turned out, the reason that they had stopped speaking was that Carole was on the look out for both of us. Before I knew what was happening, she tossed the door back open, revealing both Finn and I standing there. Her eyes went narrow, and I suddenly remembered another part of having a mother again: the fact that they didn't put up with bullshit.

Finn gave her a weak smile. "Hi, Mom. I, uh….I found my backpack."

"I helped!" I couldn't believe how eager my voice sounded. Like she was going to buy that. Like she would buy any of this.

She didn't. She just grabbed Finn by his shoulder and me by mine and spun us both around. "Eavesdropping is disrespectful and wrong."

The wise thing would have been to drop it there, but Finn has never exactly been known for doing the wise thing. "But you were talking about me! Don't I have a right to know what you're saying about me?"

"No, you don't. Have you ever heard that eavesdroppers never hear anything good about themselves?"

"No." A slight smile lurked at the corners of his mouth. "If I didn't eavesdrop on you on the phone, how would I know that Grandma Hudson was sending me a Nintendo for Christmas one year?"

Wrong thing to say. Carole's lips compressed into an even tighter line. "Do not even get me started on your father's parents. But, no, it's not alright, ever. Now tell Mr. Shuester goodbye and let's get going for lunch."

"Bye, ! I love you!" He gave the man an enthusiastic wave and bounced out the door.

We all stared after him in amazement. Was love always this casual to Finn? No, not casual, that was the wrong word. Maybe the word I was looking for was free. Despite everything that had happened to Finn, he still had a better idea of how life and love worked then I did. Maybe he had that idea because of what had happened to him.

They could have fought and hated each other and even been unbelievable cruel to at times, but Finn and Puck loved each other, too. Not in a sexual way (though I would have given up every tiara in my collection, as well as my car, to get a good look at that peep show), but in a way that came from proximity if nothing else. Had he ever told Puck that? Maybe, if copious amounts of booze were involved. But never seriously. Boys just didn't do that. And now they were out of chances.

Was he worried that the same thing would happen with Mr. Shue? That he wouldn't get a chance to tell the man how much he loved him before it was too late? Or maybe, having not heard the words himself for four months, he had realized just how important it was to be able to hear them.

Sure enough, Mr. Shue had a strange look on his face, almost as if he had swallowed a bug. I suddenly remembered that, he too, had lost a baby he thought was his. His child wouldn't have been talking yet (at least I didn't think so, but what did I know about babies? Maybe Quinn's could already do a perfect cartwheel), but I'm pretty sure every parent dreams of the first time their child tells them that they love him. Finn's father might have died a long time ago, but the boy certainly wasn't lacking in paternal love.

"Sorry about that." Carole shook her head. "I think he gets a little confused because his father died so early. He used to tell random men in public that he loved them, too."

Mr. Shue gave a funny little smile. "Honestly? I don't really mind. I had always kind of hoped…." He trailed off there, and I knew he wanted to say that he had always hoped that he would have a son like Finn. But there was still plenty of time for that, right? He was a young man, and there was plenty of time for him to find a wife who wasn't a complete nutcase. Especially if he let me do something about that hair. "You know, it doesn't matter. But you may want to remind him that he can't say that in front of other people. Especially a certain cheerleading coach."

Just because Coach Sylvester was being kinder to me, that didn't give Finn any extra protection. "I'll make sure he knows to keep it on the down low." It shouldn't be too difficult. After all, I had managed to hide the fact that I loved Finn for almost two years.

Yeah, you did such a bang-up job of that, Sweetie. Not a single person suspected that you might have a major crush on Finn Hudson.

Speaking of Finn Hudson, why hadn't he come back in to demand to know why we weren't going to lunch? "I'll go get Finn."

I stepped out into the hall, scanning for my missing….boyfriend? Was Finn my boyfriend? Should I just stick with brother?

Yeah, because 'the brother I kiss with tongue' sounds sooooo much better then 'my boyfriend'. Why do you have to call him anything? Just stick with Finn for now.

If she had waited as long for a boyfriend as I had, she would be little pickier about her terms as well. Then I turned the corner and my breath stopped. Sue had Finn trapped in the doorway, somehow seeming to loom over him despite his greater height.

I froze, still a little afraid of her, no matter how kind she had been. Sue Sylvester could turn on you without a second thought, and I wasn't delusional enough to think I was immune to that. I pressed back so they couldn't see me.

Plus, Finn seemed to be holding his own. His arms were crossed across his chest, his brow furrowed and his jaw clenched. His shoulders were squared back, not at all cringing or deferential. I couldn't hear what Coach Sylvester was threatening him with, but I had no trouble hearing his reply.

"I'm not afraid of you." His voice was flat and strong.

She smirked. "Wrong thing to say, Pork Chop. But then, you never were the brightest cookie on the sheet, were you? I suspect it might have to do with brain damage from all the second hand hairspray fumes you've inhaled from being around William Shuester."

"Why should I be afraid of you?" He wasn't backing down. "You can't do anything to me. I'm not afraid that you're going to kill me. You can threaten all you want, but I've already looked right at someone who really was going to kill me. You don't fool me. You won't hurt me either. You can push me, and you can get in my face like you're doing right now, but you won't actually hurt me. Look, I know what it feels like to be chained to a radiator for a week in 100 degree heat. Unless you can top that, I'm not afraid you'll hurt me either." Now he was the one who looked much bigger. " Anything you can say to me now is just a threat, and I'm not scared of those any more."

Just like that, Finn had figured it all out. He wasn't in physical danger. He wasn't in sexual danger. After what Joseph and Lily had put him through, he understood who was serious about hurting him and who wasn't. And once he determined that Coach Sylvester ruled by fear far more then she ruled by actions, it was a simple thing to brush her off.

Simple for Finn, that is. I was still pretty much terrified of her.

But Finn's like that. Even Before, his bravery and fears had been somewhat disproportionate to the situations at hand. Raise a baby at 16 with a girl who treated him like shit? He was afraid, but the bravery won out. Actually, I think he was the only one of the three of them who could have made a halfway decent parent. Date Rachel Berry? No fear at all. Stick up for the Glee club, even when we wouldn't stick up for ourselves? Done. Trip to the dentist? Three Valium, minimum. Centipede on the floor? I had no idea that Finn could either jump that high or scream that loud. Only centipedes, though. Something about all the wiggly little legs made him semi-hysterical. And don't even get me started on storms. What sort of teenager is still afraid of thunder?

Now Finn's life was, in large parts, ruled by his fears. I could finally shut the bathroom door all the way when I was in there, but he wouldn't do it when he was. The closet door had to be wide open, or he wouldn't go near it. Dad was able to touch him, but Finn would stiffen and squeeze his eyes shut like he expected a blow at any second. Which was strange, because he had made it very clear that Joseph and never once struck him. Don't grab Finn from behind, don't push him to talk about Puck, don't ever, ever, leave the house without being very clear about where you're going and when you'll be back.

But he did let Dad touch him. He was doing his best to ensure family harmony. He didn't insist that we stay home with him, or that anyone accompany him into the walk in closet. He had even agreed to go shopping with me tomorrow, out in the world where anything could happen to him. He was facing each fear as best he could, which, in my opinion, was as brave as could be.

Coach Sylvester interrupted my musings with a snort. "Well, well, well, someone's suddenly become the big man on campus. Good for you, Frankenteen. You've figured out that the big bad wolf is mostly huff and puff. You're right, I can't hurt you. I won't kill you; I won't even lay a hand on you. I could still devastate you emotionally with out even trying, but why bother? You've fallen beneath my notice."

Finn nodded. "Then we agree."

I genuinely don't think he was trying to be sassy. Knowing Finn, he was probably pleased to be beneath Coach Sylvester's notice, just like he was pleased to be beneath the notice of most every other adult.

But it wasn't going to sound that way to her. What she was going to hear was that Finn considered her beneath his own notice, and if there was one thing that Sue Sylvester couldn't stand, it was not being noticed. "Really? Well, I'll just have to make sure that I keep on your sights, now won't I? Now fly little bird, fly away. Just take care that you don't fly right into any windshields."

I could have told her that that threat was going to fly right over Finn's head and, oh Prada, I had just continued on with the stupid bird metaphor. Someone just put me out of my misery. Sure enough, Finn just shrugged. "Ok."

Now was probably the time to get Finn out of there. I stepped forward and into Finn's line of sight. "Finn? Come on, Cowboy, we're leaving."

Sue had already turned away, as if to reinforce that only she could end a conversation and nothing he said from here on out was of even the slightest importance. I held out a hand, and Finn took it, giving me that smile that only raised one corner of his mouth.

"By the way, Lady-Face, don't think I didn't see you standing there. I'm sure your brother could have used your back-up a few minutes ago. Or is that not how it is in your family? Lord, the decay of our good moral values."

I jolted at the sound of her voice, and my suddenly clammy hand squeezed Finn's so tightly that he gave little yelp and glared at me. I dropped my voice so only he could hear me. "Sorry." Then I raised it to reply to Coach Sylvester. "There's nothing wrong my family! It's a great family! A good enough family that I was taught that interrupting someone else's conversation was rude, at any rate. Besides, from where I was standing, it looked like Fin was holding his own." My voice was doing that breathy squeak thing, and I wished I could make it stronger. Even Finn had been able to stand up for himself, why couldn't I do it?

She spun and stormed back over her eyes snapping at me. I flinched back a little, causing Finn to drop my hand and put his arm around my shoulders instead. I pressed back and he pulled me close, his chin dropping on top of my head. There was no mistaking the possessiveness of the gesture, which meant my only hope was that Coach Sylvester mistook it for brotherly possessiveness, rather then what it actually was.

She didn't. I could tell by the sudden, feral, glint in her eyes. "Oh, my, what is this? Just what have the two of you been up to all summer? Why Frankenteen, are you the reason my little flier can't show up for Cheerio's practice 7 days a week? Or at all? Has he been doing his push-ups elsewhere? In your bed, perhaps?"

Finn didn't make a sound, which would have led me to believe that he didn't understand what she meant if I couldn't feel his heart suddenly start to pound against my back. He knew what she was implying, and the thought frightened him. But on the outside, he looked as disconnected and puzzled as ever.

He might not be the brightest crayon in the box, but Finn isn't as stupid as he seems, either. A lot of the time he plays dumb just to be left alone, like a possum curling into a ball. Eventually people assume he's too thick to get it at all, and stop asking.

It wasn't much of a defense, but it did work for Finn. His teachers passed him less because he could do the work, and more because he was likeable and not a discipline problem. Carole was still doing his laundry and making his bed for him, despite the fact that he was more then capable of both tasks. Even Joseph and Lily had mistaken his steady silence and blank expression for complete submission, when it was just the mark of someone who was too tired to keep fighting, but knew enough to bide his time.

The dumb face worked this time, too. Coach Sylvester threw up her hands. "And this is why kids in India are killing us with their test scores. Because every moron in this country is required to go to school and waste our teachers valuable time and resources. The world needs ditch diggers, too."

"Finn's not stupid! He passed all of his exams today, which is better then half of the Cheerios did!" Since Finn had gone quiet, I stepped up to defend him.

"Oh, yes, I'm sure he's become quite proficient at studying the male anatomy. Isn't that right, Pork Chop?" Finn sucked in a quick breath behind me, the small shudder betraying how badly her words had made him want to cry.

To her credit, I think Coach Sylvester realized she had pushed it just a bit too far. Her eyes softened a bit when she looked over Finn, and I knew in that heartbeat that she understood exactly what he had gone through. "But then again, there might be hope for you yet. After all, you managed to make it home, when I wouldn't have thought you could make it around the school without having to stop and ask for directions."

We were at an impasse now, neither side being willing to back down. Finn was still, one arm still holding my body possessively against his. Sue stood watching, a dark look in her eyes. I stared at her, unable to make myself look away.

In the end, it was Carole who broke the staring contest. "Boys? Where are you?"

"Here, Mom!" For as tough as he had been, Finn was clearly delighted to have this escape.

She came and sussed the situation in an instant, gathering both Finn and I to her. "I don't believe we've met. I'm Carole Hudson, the boy's mother."

"Really." Coach Sylvester's tone didn't suggest she was particularly impressed, which was a bad move on her part. Since she herself was entirely devoid of maternal (or even human) feelings, she had no frame of reference for what a mother would go through to protect her cubs, or even a cub that was hers by default rather then biology. I wasn't aware that Kurt here had a mother."

Carole's eyes narrowed. Here was someone who she could actually fight against. Not two people who were in jail and thus safe from her wrath, not the police who had done everything but find Finn for her, not even Puck, who had put Finn in harms way, even though he hadn't meant to and had ended up paying the ultimate price. The fact that Coach Sylvester had height, power, and sheer meanness on her side meant absolutely nothing. "A lot of things have changed." Her tone was acid.

"So I see. Well, it's nice to…how should I put this?" She rested a finger on her chin as she fake thought. "Oh, I know. It's nice to keep it all in the family, isn't it? I love to see a little good old fashioned closeness between two brothers. Sharing secrets, giggling together under the covers. It's all very charming. Lower middle class meets Brokeback Mountain."

"Oh I see." Carole's voice was exaggeratedly bright. "You're implying that my boys are sexual partners. Because, really? Is that the best you can come up with? That one or both of them might be gay? Are you really that unenlightened?"

Her jaw dropped. My jaw dropped. From the sudden pressure on top of my head, I thought that Finn's might have as well. Had she really just stood up to the evil Sylvester breast? Carole, perhaps sensing that her victory might be short lived, grabbed my by my shoulder and Finn by his and pushed us forward. "You two, to the car, right this second."

We both followed numbly, allowing her to pull us down the hall. Once we were in the car, she turned to look at us in the rearview mirror. "I don't want either one of you to thing that I've forgotten your eavesdropping, or that you'll escape being punished for it."

With Dad, this was the part where I smoothly talked my way out of trouble. I opened my mouth to try, but Finn beat me to it. He rested one hand over mine and pressed his lips to my ear. "Don't. The more you fight, the madder she gets and the worse it ends up being."

The soft rush of air over my ears was doing all kinds of good things for me, but I forced that thought down so I could whisper back. "Fine, but you're taking the brunt of the punishment. She's your mother."

He grinned. "I know, isn't she great?"

I leaned back into the seat and made myself look as cute as possible. Slightly dropped head, big blue eyes, folded hands. I had Disney written all over me. Surely Carole couldn't punish someone so sweet and innocent?

"Kurt, don't even try it. You're in trouble and that isn't going to get you out."

Damn.