Hi all! As always, thanks for being patient with me! I'm going to try my hardest to speed up my writing, but I'm not sure that's going to happen in the next couple of weeks.
Today, I came up with a lot of ideas that I am really very excited for with this story! I honestly love these kids so much, and I cannot wait until you guys see what's in store for them!
The next chapter should be the last chapter in this story. Then, I'm going to start the next story in this series which will be the longer story that has a lot more in it than this does (like a new villain specifically made for the kids...and much, much more)!
I hope you all love this as much as I do! Please let me know what your thoughts on this story are! I would love, love, love to hear from you all about this story!
Hope to see you all soon!
The absolute last thing James wanted to do was to go home, but that's exactly what he felt like he was being forced to do. He followed Uncle Alec back into the Institute, completely silent and cold to his uncle in a way he wasn't sure he'd ever been. He knew that his family was trying to help, but that didn't seem to make a difference at the moment. When Uncle Alec had all but ordered him to come home, James had sincerely fought with his uncle for the first time in his life. He'd known that he wouldn't win, but that hadn't kept him from trying anyway. James couldn't even remember the last time he'd so much as been angry with his uncle, but at the moment, he couldn't even so much as look at Uncle Alec.
The worst part of it all was that James knew his uncle was right. But James also knew that if it had been Aunt Isabelle that Uncle Alec wouldn't have left her side for anything in the world. Charlie had been in surgery for several hours before they'd left, and James knew that she'd likely be in surgery for several more. At the moment, the surgery was being watched over by Aunt Catarina, the only person who would be able to magically hide the fact that Charlie's blood was any different from that of mundanes. They'd pulled James away, telling him that there was nothing he could do for Charlie at the moment.
So James pushed past his uncle and headed straight for his room, refusing to look back even when Alec called to him. For the first time in his life, James ignored Max as well, pushing past everyone, determined to be alone no matter what that took. He shouldn't have been surprised when Max followed him into his room. This time, however, James didn't stop to try to get Max to leave, he simply laid down on his bed and ignored the other boy. The only thing he wanted to do at the moment was to go to sleep, but he knew that he would never be able to, that he wouldn't be able to stop thinking about Charlie long enough to do so.
James was terribly relieved when Max simply sat down in the chair next to his bed without saying a word. It was almost as though Max understood that James needed someone with him but that James didn't want to be bothered by anything at the moment. It was almost as though Max understood this better than James understood it himself. For the first time all day, James finally relaxed into the silence around him. He hadn't realized just how loud the hospital was until he was surrounded by silence once more. Without meaning to, James found himself slipping into sleep, which he knew was a terrible idea. His dreams were bound to be much worse than any of the thoughts he was currently having.
As a last resort, James got out of bed and motioned for Max to follow him, still unable to find his voice. He was very lucky, however, to know that Max would pick up on absolutely every little thought of his. That meant that he didn't need to voice his thoughts for Max to figure out that he wanted to go work off all of his stress in the training room. That meant that he didn't have to voice all of his fears for Max to know exactly what he was worried about or even for Max to know exactly what to do to help him work through those feelings.
"Let's spar," James said as soon as they had walked through the door of the training room. Sparring with Max was always the most difficult for him because Max would fight with a combination of hand-to-hand and with the use of his magic. Having to dodge Max's magic generally took much more from James than sparring with any of the others, and right now, he wanted to focus all of his attention on something other than his sister. Max seemed to sense this because he simply set up to spar without saying a word, somehow understanding James almost better than James understood himself.
At first, the spar was a huge relief to James, forcing his mind to focus on the movements he was making rather than what might be happening to Charlie at the moment. James let the action of sparring take him away from the reality of everything else that was going on around him. He let himself think that nothing was wrong, that he and Max were simply training like normal; he knew his father would call it a delusion, but at the moment, that was the only thing keeping him halfway sane. Yet James paused in a mixture of surprise and fear when something completely out of the ordinary happened. Max had never once actually allowed his magic to hit anyone while sparring. It was simply supposed to be a training measure and not something that could actually wound anyone.
But James couldn't help but stop when Max's magic hit his shoulder. It was just a spell to stun, nothing that actually hurt him, but the force of the spell surprised James so much that he had no idea what to do. He looked at Max in pure confusion, but before he could do anything at all, sparks were flying toward him once more, and he had to dodge the spell before he could be hit again. "Max! What's going on?" James asked, knowing that his voice was frantic but knowing that he was unable to change that fact at the moment. Not when there were even more sparks headed toward him yet again.
Between the sudden bursts of magic that James had to dodge, he got the chance to really look at Max. What terrified James the most was the fact that everything about Max seemed to have changed from the kind and gentle person Max normally was. Usually when sparring, the sparks only covered Max's fingertips, but right now, it seemed to James as though the sparks were slowly making their way up Max's arms, something he'd only ever seen from Uncle Magnus, and even that was something he'd only seen when Uncle Magnus had been fighting a demon. Yet even though James was terrified, he could very easily see just how scared Max was as well. This was something that only confused James even more. From the way Max was frantically looking at him, it seemed as if Max was out of control, as though his magic had a mind of its own at the moment, something that had never happened to Max before.
James was so focused on Max's fear that he didn't realize that there were more sparks headed toward him, and this time, it was much more than a slight graze on his shoulder. Max's spell caught him square in the chest far before he had time to react, and suddenly James found himself flying toward the wall at a speed much faster than he would have thought possible, at least when it was coming from Max. As James shook off the effect of the impact, he saw Max coming toward him, and at first he was slightly worried. But then he realized that Max seemed to have snapped out of whatever had been going on, that he was coming to see if James was hurt, that he was absolutely horrified by what had just happened.
Max helped him up, but before either of them were able to say anything at all, James jumped as his father walked through the door. His first thought was that something horrible had happened to Charlie, that his father was there to deliver the bad news, and suddenly James couldn't take it anymore. Between his confusion and worry over whatever was going on with Max and the terror he'd been feeling over Charlie all day, James couldn't imagine anything worse happening. "Could you give us a minute, Max?" Jace asked. James was unable to gather absolutely anything from his father's voice, so all he was left to do was speculate.
James watched as Max left the room, his heart rate increasing with every second. When Jace finally spoke again, James resisted the urge to close his eyes, as though that would somehow help him take the news a bit better. "Charlie's fine, James. She just got out of surgery and Catarina says that she's going to be fine. The wires on her pacemaker came loose while she was training. Catarina secretly added a spell to make sure that it wouldn't happen again. The pacemaker wasn't built for the extreme training that Shadowhunters go through." Jace paused and took a deep breath, almost as if he had to collect himself for a moment. "But that's not what I want to talk to you about right now, son."
Reluctantly, James moved to sit with his father on the one bench that the training room had, automatically staring at his feet as soon as he sat down, unable to look at his father in any way. Naturally, he was terribly relieved that Charlie was going to be okay; that was the best thing his father had told him in quite a while. But James had the sinking feeling that the conversation with his father was far from over. "Your Uncle Alec and I had a talk yesterday," Jace said, but before he could continue, James cut him off. James was fairly certain that this was the first time in his life that he'd ever done so, his respect for his father far outweighing any anger he'd felt before now. But now, James couldn't keep himself from responding in the way he so desperately needed to.
"Dad, please don't. I know what's coming, and I'm not ready to hear it, not today at least." James tried to soften his voice, but he was very aware of the fact that his tone was cold to say the least. "I know I suck at fighting, you don't have to tell me that. I just want to go see Charlie now." James tried to stand up, tried to indicate that he simply just wanted to leave and be with his sister, but surprisingly, his father held up a hand and all but ordered him to stop.
"Sit back down, James," Jace said, his voice forceful but not cold in any way, and James automatically wondered why that was. "We need to have this talk right now, and then I swear to you I'll take you to see Charlie. But I refuse to leave this alone. There's so much tension between us right now, and I cannot let that go unchecked. I simply can't, James." For a moment, James began to wonder if he'd done the wrong thing by talking to Uncle Alec, but he knew that Uncle Alec had only talked to his father because he cared. "Talk to me, son. Tell me what's going on. You don't have to go to Uncle Alec; you know that, James. Just talk to me."
James hesitated, refusing to lift his eyes from the ground, unable to figure out the best way to continue. He knew that his father was right, and that was the most frustrating part of it all. "You know exactly what I want to say," James replied, knowing that he was being a bit childish. "I'm the worst Shadowhunter this family has ever seen. That's a very simple fact. And trust me when I say that I know how disappointed you are in me. Naturally the son of one of the best Shadowhunters ever is more likely to fall on his own seraph blade than to actually be killed by a demon." James paused, taking a deep breath and trying to gather exactly where he'd been going with the conversation.
This pause seemed to be just the thing that Jace had been looking for because he began speaking again, his voice far more controlled than James had expected it to be. "Disappointed?" Jace asked, no clear accusation in his voice. "Son, I have never been disappointed in you for a single moment in your entire life. Sure, you're not the best warrior in the world. So what?" It was clear that Jace was going to continue, but James didn't give him the chance to. He was far too worked up to keep himself quiet at the moment.
"So what?" he asked his father, finally looking up from the ground, finally getting the courage he needed to meet Jace's eyes. "Fighting is literally the only thing in the world that Shadowhunters are meant to do. And it just so happens to be the one thing that I am absolutely horrible at. I'm absolutely horrible at the one thing that makes us who we are. I don't know about you, but if I was the great Jace Herondale, I would definitely be disappointed to have me for a son." James watched as his father's eyes softened at that. James looked back down at his feet, suddenly unable to meet his father's eyes again. He had no idea where any of this was coming from, but he did know that this was the last thing his father had expected when he'd asked to talk.
"James," Jace began, his voice slow and careful. "This isn't about me. There are always going to be people around you who are much better than you at fighting. I've never once thought to compare you to myself because, you know what? You're not meant to be me, James. In fact, I often think that it's a very good thing that you are nothing like me. The world may compare you to me, but I honestly do not care in the slightest about what anyone else thinks. You're my son, and that's enough for me." James stood up, this time dodging his father when Jace tried to get him to sit back down.
"If that's good enough for you, then why I have I never once felt like that?" James asked, knowing that he was being entirely unfair with his father. He could see his father flinch, but at the moment, all he really cared about was getting to Charlie and forgetting about what was going on with his father. "I'll never be good enough, and I've accepted that, Dad. Now can we please go see Charlie?" There was a very long pause, but Jace finally stood up as well. Jace simply nodded, obviously too stunned to say anything else.
As they headed toward the door, James began to wonder whether or not he'd done the right thing. He knew that his father always expected honesty from them, that Jace wouldn't have wanted him to say anything other than the truth. But at the moment, all James could see was the pain that he had caused his father, and for a moment, he considered stopping his father and taking everything back. But before he could, Jace paused at the door, his voice soft as he opened the door for James. "This conversation isn't over," Jace said, motioning for James to lead the way to Charlie.
Finally getting to hug Charlie once again was the biggest relief that James had ever felt. Suddenly, James didn't care that his father was there or that the tension between them hadn't diminished in any way. All that mattered was that Charlie was fine, that she would be going home in just a few days. "You're gonna get out just in time to go to the ball," James said when their parents had finally left them alone for a bit. Every year, the Clave held a ball in celebration of the victories in the Mortal and Dark Wars. Every year, the entire family packed up and went to Idris for a week, spending some time in the countryside after the ball.
The Clave always made a huge deal out of recognizing their parents, aunt, and uncles. Not that they would actually go to any great lengths to do anything for them, seeing as they still hadn't granted Uncles Magnus and Alec the right to marry in a Shadowhunter ceremony, something they'd been fighting for all of James's life. The whole thing seemed greatly hypocritical to James, but he'd always enjoyed the time spent in Idris nonetheless. "Not sure I'm gonna feel up to it this year," Charlie replied, her voice soft in a way James hadn't heard it in a very long time. "So much brownnosing with the Clave and what do they give us in return?"
It was very obvious to James that Charlie was referring to Uncles Magnus and Alec's fight with the Clave, and he couldn't help but agree. "Yeah," James said, trying to keep the mischief out of his voice. "But you and I both know how many cute girls always show up." James smiled when Charlie chuckled, unable to laugh like she normally would because of the pain from her chest. The entire time, James had refused to look at the scar on Charlie's chest. Charlie had always had the scar; she'd had heart surgery when she was little, so this was nothing new to James. But the difference now was that the scar was fresh, that he knew she was in pain because of it now.
Charlie moved closer to James, resting her head on his shoulder. "Will you stay with me tonight, James?" she asked, her voice even softer than before. James could tell that she was extremely tired, that she was falling asleep, and he couldn't blame her for that, not when so many pain meds were running through her body at the moment. Instead of responding, James simply wrapped his arm around her, refusing to look up as his father entered the room once more. James wanted to tell Charlie that he was going to protect her from now on, that he was going to start being the brother he was supposed to be, but instead he simply kissed the top of her head as she closed her eyes, terribly thankful that Charlie was no longer in pain.