A/N: Let me be the first to bitch here. I hate, hate, hate this new filtering system on . I didn't always like the old one, but I did have a good chance of getting a story that featured the characters I wanted. If I want to filter Finn and Kurt, I don't want 200 other stories that might have the two of them share a line or two. It makes it really hard to find what I actually want.

Ok, rant over, enjoy the story and a little Kurt abuse for a change of pace

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your High School class is running the world

Kurt Vonnegut

"Finn, it will be ok. I've been going to school for 12 years now, and this is my third one at McKinley. You don't need to worry about me."

He snorted. "It's the fact that you're going back to McKinley that worries me. I know how those assholes are, and there won't be anyone to protect you."

It was sweet that he was worried, but it was decidedly misplaced. I had survived my freshman and most of my sophomore year with no one to protect me. "I have the rest of the Glee club. It's only a few hours, and I'll be home."

The worried look didn't fade, but he had to recognize that there was nothing he could do about it now. I was going to school and he wasn't, period. "Besides, Glee starts back up next week and you'll be there for that."

Mentioning Glee always perked him up, and a smile touched the corners of his mouth. "I know. I already have my song ready. Mr. Shue and I finished it the other day."

Ah, yes, the mysterious song. Finn refused to give me any hints, but I was hoping that it was for me. If it wasn't, why hide it? I had even gone as far as to snoop in his things, looking for clues, but there was nothing. Apparently he's moved beyond using his sock drawer. By the way? He should thank me for getting rid of those disgusting pornographic magazines before Carole found them. He should be thankful for a lot of things I did for him while he was….away.

"You look really good today." Finn's voice drew me out of my thoughts.

"Thank you. Are you planning on getting dressed at all?" It was a fair question. The garage was closed today, and if I wasn't around to drag him out of the house, he probably wouldn't leave.

"Yep. I have therapy at 11. But probably not until then." For the most part, Finn's delightfully honest.

"Are you coming up for breakfast?" Choosing my first day of school outfit had taken longer then anticipated, so I was running a little late.

"Uh-uh." He rolled over and snuggled back into the pillows. "I'm going back to sleep."

I wished I could snuggle with him one more time, but I just couldn't. I did, however, lean over the side of our bed. I don't even know why we keep his, since he never uses it any more, and it's become the graveyard of my unwanted outfits. "Can I at least have a good-bye kiss?"

That he was happy to give me, which lifted my mood. "Bye, I'll see you in a few hours."

"Love you." Even though he had yet to say it back, I always told him that. There's no one in this world that has been injured by having more people to love them.

His lips quirked up. "I'll see you in a little bit."

He was breathing deeply again before I was all the way up the stairs. Lucky bastard. I grabbed some toast and coffee, taking a deep breath to steady my nerves. Despite my brave words, I was a little afraid of going to school today. It would not only be the usual start of the school year chaos, but the first time I had seen almost then entire school since Finn had come back. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried.

With the exception of the six or seven school days that I had taken Finn to school with me when he and Carole first moved in with us, I had never given anyone a ride to school. Normally, I like that. It gives me a chance to prepare myself for the day ahead, and get ready for any dumpster tosses that might be headed my way.

But that was forever ago. For almost two months now, I've had a constant companion in Finn. He sat in the passenger seat, making little comments and changing the radio station to something atrocious. The car felt empty without him. Could I be having Finn withdrawal in less then an hour?

Once I made it to school, I parked in my usual place and texted Mercedes to come out and meet me. No one would dare touch her. First of all, she could probably kick their asses. Second, no one wants to bully just her and risk being labeled a bigot. Being a homophobe is fine, but no one wants to be a racist.

She appeared like magic, a vision in dark blue as she strode across the parking lot. Thank Prada she was wearing the outfit I had helped her choose instead of that zebra striped monstrosity that she had wanted. When I started to open the door, though, she pushed it back shut and climbed in the passenger side. "Boy, its a little crazy in there. You are suddenly the most popular boy in school."

I had to ask, even though I already knew the answer. "Because of Finn." I couldn't even fake my way into it sounding like a question.

"Because of Finn. What happened with him and Puck is the biggest thing to hit Lima in probably ever, and everyone wants the inside scoop. Right now, Baby Boy, you're the closest thing they have to asking Finn himself."

I could only imagine the sort of questions they wanted to ask Finn, and the offensive ways the questions would probably be coached. Though I had initially been against the idea of keeping him home, I supposed it did save him the horror of being asked what exactly Puck had looked like after being shot in the head.

I leaned my head back against the seat. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Tell them to fuck off. You don't owe anyone anything. If Finn wants to talk to anyone, he can do it himself when he comes back to school."

It sounded so easy when she said it, but there was no way I would be able to tell a member of the hockey team (or anyone else, for that matter) to fuck off. Being rude and sarcastic was in my nature, but only when it was me. For some reason, I had a miserable time trying to come up with something to say. "This is going to be Hell, isn't it?"

Her hand found mine and squeezed. "Yep. But we can do it. We owe both Finn and Puck that."

Even a year ago, the thought of me owing Noah Puckerman anything would have made me laugh hysterically. Now it was just sad.

Sure enough, people I had never met were in my face and asking questions before I even got in the door. Where was Finn? How was Finn? Was it true that he had been raped? Mutilated? Left brain damaged? Tried to commit suicide? Was that why he wasn't with me? Was Finn going to jail? Was I going to the trial? The questions came faster and faster, until I couldn't tell one from the other. My chest tightened and it became hard to breathe. Mercedes was holding my arm so tightly that I knew it would be bruised by this afternoon, but I welcomed the pain. It was the only thing holding me to reality.

"As much as I enjoy a freak show, this is pathetic even by the standards of this school. Move on or I'll have all of you out there running laps." I had never been so grateful to hear Coach Sylvester's megaphone.

Curiosity is a powerful thing, but fear is even more so, and the crowds quickly dispersed. But it didn't mean much. I wouldn't have protection all over this school, and it only took a few seconds to ask something.

I was raised to be polite to adults, though, so I walked up to her. "Thank you for that."

Her look was pitying. "Look, Porcelain. I'll do what I can, but you're going to need to toughen up. I know that you can't help looking like a ten year old, but you have to stop acting like one. It's time to grow up and take this like a man."

"That's not fair." Mercedes has never feared Coach Sylvester the way most people did.

"You know what else isn't fair? Life. I'm sure Lurch could tell you all about it, if you can pry him out of whatever attic he seems to be being kept in." Her words were harsh, but they were exactly what I needed to hear. This might get better, but it was far more likely to get worse instead.

That was when I noticed the woman standing next to Coach Sylvester. How I had missed her in the first place was a mystery, because she was huge. At least 6 feet tall and built bigger then Finn was. I smiled timidly at her. "Hi, I'm Kurt Hummel."

"Shannon Bieste. I'm Coach Tanaka's replacement." She was trying to act like she, and probably every teacher in this school, hadn't been briefed on what had happened, and carefully instructed in how to act towards me and eventually Finn when he chose to make an appearance. Not that Figgins cared one way or the other, but Carole had made it very clear that she had no issues with a lawsuit if she felt that either one of our needs weren't being properly met. "You tell your brother that if he wants to come back, I'll have a place for him on my teams."

Finn had already been clear that he didn't want to go back to football, but it was a kind offer. "Thank you. I'm pretty sure he doesn't want to play football this year, but he hasn't said anything about baseball or basketball."

"Tell him that he's welcome to try out, even if he's still on homebound. I'll be glad to have him." Her voice was gruff, but compassionate.

Unfortunately, I had been right about the rest of the day. Coach Sylvester had been right. Finn was officially Lima's Freak Show, and I was the man out front taking the money. I'm pretty sure 95% of the words I uttered were some variation of 'he's fine', 'I don't know', 'no', and 'he'll be back in school soon'. Ok, the last one was probably more wishful thinking on my part, but still.

The teachers did their best to corral everyone in, but it wasn't easy. There isn't much to do on the first day of school other then gossip about what you did all summer, and what was I supposed to say to everyone? 'I spent the first half fending for myself while my father and stepmother looked frantically for my kidnapped brother. To break up the monotony, we had regular police visits, where I learned the joys of seeing pictures of dead kids that looked a little like Finn. The second half of the summer was much better, because Finn came home, but I can't share any of the dirty details because I actually respect his privacy. But it hasn't exactly been the summer of my life.'

By noon, I had actually given myself a stomachache and was debated whether or not to call home and beg someone to sign me out of school so I could leave. The only problem was that it was a cop-out, and I knew it. If I got to go home today, I would want to do it tomorrow, and the next day, and pretty soon Finn and I would both be getting tutored at home. No, I had to stick with it. Only three more hours, and I would be free.

I still planned on skipping lunch, though. Maybe some fresh air would help me relax. Mercedes who had told me that the bleachers were a good place to be alone and think. Maybe I could even give Finn a call to check up on him?

I never got the chance, though. I was still in the hallway by the science labs when I found myself shoved into a set of lockers. One of the combination locks dug sharply into my back, and I knew there was going to be a mark there. "What the hell!"

My voice faded when I realized that my assailant was actually five football players, and not one of them was smiling. I juked to the left, but they had already penned me in. "Not so fast, fag."

These boys had been my teammates last year, but that didn't seem to mean anything now. I scanned their faces, looking for one that I remembered and who might help. Donny, Adam, Sean, none of them would do anything. They had all enjoyed rounds of 'toss the fag' both before and after I had joined the team. I didn't even recognize the other two. Either they were new this year or I just hadn't bothered learning their names.

"What are you guys doing?" If I tried not to show them any fear. If I panicked now, I would only make things worse.

No one spoke. Either they hadn't designated a spokesperson, or none of them were evolved enough to form words with more then one syllable. Looking from one to the other, I thought that it could go either way.

While I w as having that debate, Donny grabbed me, one hand clamped over my mouth. "Get him in the room before someone sees us."

No! If they managed to trap me in an empty classroom, they could do whatever they wanted to me. I jerked from side to side, but he was much stronger then I was. The five of them had no trouble forcing me into the room.

Once we were in there, though, they seemed to be unsure of what exactly they wanted to do to me. Sean glared. "You know that this whole thing with Hudson and Puckerman was your fault, right?"

Oh, dear Prada, were we going back to this again? It wasn't my fault. Finn didn't blame me, and that was what counted. If Puck blamed me (and I didn't think he would. He might have been a jerk, but he did seem to have a pretty good handle on fair and unfair), he hadn't come by to haunt me and tell me about it, so I'm alright with it. Yes, I still blamed myself a little, but I was working on that.

"Hey, Dude?" It was one of the mystery players. "He can't tell you anything if you don't let go of his mouth."

Ooh, one of them had some brains! Donny leaned closer to my ear. "If you scream, I'll rip your fucking dick off. It's not like you're going to using it, anyway."

I would probably get to use mine far before he got to use his, considering his repugnant personality. I nodded, though. Screaming now would serve no purpose. Everyone was in class or at lunch, and no one would be able to hear me. If I could hold out for 15 minutes or so, there was a much better change of being heard.

His hand came off, and I sucked in a few breaths of fresh air. Would it kill the guy to wash his hands once a while? "So, what does the littlest fag have to say for himself?"

"I wasn't aware that I had been asked a question." I kept my voice level and calm, as if I was trying to placate a rabid dog.

"You weren't. But since you need it all spelled out for you, how's this: how does it feel to know that you converted Finn over to your disgusting gay side?"

They knew. But how? I certainly hadn't told, and I couldn't believe that either Mercedes or Tina had. Finn wasn't even in the picture, and our parents would go to their graves before they would tell our secrets. "What are you talking about?"

"We all know that Hudson takes it up the ass now. It's all over the fucking news. He was normal until he moved in with you. Now Puckerman's dead, and Hudson's a fucking fairy."

So Finn was to blame for his own rape. Even though I had known that people would feel that way, it was still shocking to hear someone express it so forcefully. I wanted to refute them, but what was I supposed to say? I refused to confirm the sexual assaults, even though everyone who had a television knew what had happened. "Finn's the same person he's always been. None of what happened to him was his fault."

"We're not blaming him, you queer. We're blaming you." Before I could think of anything, much less an appropriate reply, his fist collided with my stomach. The breath rushed from my lungs, and I struggled to take another. A second punch hit me in the chest, and I swear that my heart stopped for a second.

"Hey!" Adam's voice sounded frightened. "Be careful! You don't want to fucking kill him."

They may well want to kill me. I was not a kidnapper, a murderer, or a child molester, but that didn't matter. My sexuality made me different, and thus the enemy. And because I was a clear enemy, I was guilty in their eyes. I was everything that had gone wrong in Lima, and that was frightening to them.

"Maybe I do. Maybe the scales need to be balanced again." His fist rose again, and I cringed.

Then I was yanked to the side, out of the way of the blow. "No. If you really hurt him, we're going to be in trouble, and off the team. You can't do that."

Due to my new position, I was no longer completely hemmed in. Adam also wasn't holding me as tightly as Donny had been. If I timed it just right….without warning I broke for the door. I knew that I could run faster then they could, and if I could make it to the hallway, I would be safe.

The adrenaline pumping through my body briefly overrode the pain shooting through my stomach and chest. But it wasn't going to last. I had to be quick, and I had to be smart.

I knew that they would think I was headed for Figgins, or a teacher that could help me, so I went in the opposite direction, shooting out the side door of a school and bolting for my car. I could lock the doors behind me and be safe.

I was able to get there and slam the door behind me. Ok, what did I do now? Wincing, I pulled my shirt up to see the bruises already forming on my chest and stomach. Once you added them to the marks on my arm from Mercedes earlier, I was starting to look a little abused. How was I going to get through the rest of the day?

Someone tapped on the window, and I couldn't help but give a quick shriek. What if they broke a window or tried to tip the car? I jerked sideways and found myself face to face with Mr. Shuester. While he wasn't my favorite person, at least he wasn't going to hurt me. I hastily pulled my shirt back down and slid out of the car. "Hi, Mr. Shue."

My voice sounded incredibly fake to me, but it was enough to fool him. "Artie said he saw you go tearing by the window, and called me to come after you. Was someone chasing you?"

No, I was doing it for fun. Of course someone was chasing me. If I said that, though, he would insist on knowing who it had been and why. Then he would make me report it to Figgins. Which would do a grand total of nothing, because nobody cared. The football players in this school were untouchable. The only thing that it would accomplish would be labeling me as a snitch.

"I was just giving Finn a call. I promised him I would do it at noon and I was late." Hopefully that would put him off. At the very least, it would give me some protection until I had arrived at my next class.

"How is Finn? He seemed pretty happy about something the last time I spoke to him."

I would like to think that I was the source of Finn's happiness, but it could have been anything. Last week he was thrilled because Carole made cheesecake to go along with dinner, and two days ago he was delighted because the Wooly Worm caterpillars had hatched and he counted well over a hundred in the backyard. So it could have been anything. "He's doing well. He's been helping Dad at the garage some days and is actually keeping up with his schoolwork. He passed the 10th grade with no problems."

Now that we were on the subject of his favorite student, Mr. Shuester easily forgot about my earlier behavior. "That sounds like it would be right up his alley. Glee starts next Wednesday; can we expect him to be there?"

"Yes. He's looking forward to it." He only talked about it five or six times a day.

"That's wonderful to hear. Let me know if there's anything I can do for either one of you."

Since poisoning the entire football team was probably a little out of his capabilities, I settled for a weak nod. "I'll let you know."

Now that I had to keep an eye out for homicidal football players, I found the rude questions of the rest of the school a little less distressing. At least they weren't likely to add to my bruises. By the last period of the day, I had perfected my icy glare. Really, that was the only response required.

Still, I was drained by the end of the day. Rachel wanted to get the Glee club together, even though no extracurricular started until next week (with the exception of the Cheerios, who never disbanded), but I ignored her text. I just wasn't up to dealing with her drama today, especially since I was sure that Finn was at home having drama of his own.

By the time I made it home, my chest and stomach were hurting miserably. I just wanted to lie down for a while. There were no broken ribs, and no internal damage, but it still hurt.

Finn was sprawled out on the basement floor, working on some schoolwork with his ear buds in. His head bobbed with the beat and there was as smile lurking on his lips. He jumped when I patted his back, and the smile grew into a full on grin. "Kurt! How are you how was school did you learn anything did anyone ask about me when does Glee start how's Rachel do you want to do something guess what we're having sumo chicken for dinner and I already made the salad so you wouldn't have to and your Dad went to the garage for a while but he'll be back for dinner and Mom's at the doctor but she'll be back really soon." He had to pause for a breath there, and just stopped, looking at me expectantly.

Remind me again why I was so desperate for him to start talking again? He had been moving so fast that the only things I got from him were that he was curious about how my day had been and we were having sumo chicken for dinner. "My day went fine. What are you up to?"

He sighed heavily. "Math. Why do they have to put letters in it? The numbers are bad enough."

I knelt down so I could pat his back. "I'll help you after dinner."

"Cool." He sat up and gave me a hug. It was sweet. Or at least it would have been sweet if he didn't hug right on my bruises. I was unable to keep myself from giving a grunt of pain. "Ow."

Finn's eyes narrowed. "Ow what?"

Before I could think of a plausible lie, he pulled me to my feet. "Take your shirt off."

If he saw those bruises, he was gong to freak out. "Finn."

There was no moving him. "Kurt, either take it off or I'll take it off for you. And I'm pretty sure you don't want me trying to undo those buttons."

No, I didn't want that. This shirt cost well over three hundred dollars, and Finn's version of undoing the buttons usually involved tearing the fabric. "I'll do it."

He didn't make a sound as he turned my body, though he was practically vibrating with rage. When he had finally inspected me all over, he pulled my chin up so we were face to face. "So I count one bruise on your stomach, one bruise on your chest, and one in the middle of your back. Plus what looks like finger bruises on your arm. Do you want to tell me how that happened?"

Not really. I thought fast. "Mercedes grabbed my arm too hard. You know that skin like mine bruises very easily."

"Did she hit you, too? Because she doesn't really seem like an abusive woman to me. Who really did it?"

There was no point in lying. "Some of the football players. Adam, Sean, Donny, and two guys I didn't recognize. They shoved me into a locker and hit me."

"Tell me what the two you didn't recognize looked like." The hand stroking the side of my neck was gentle, but his voice was flinty.

This was a bad idea, but I liked the thought of tattling to my big strong boyfriend. It was kind of a thrill to know that he would do whatever it took to protect me. "Tall with red hair and green eyes. Bad skin. The other guy was really short, but solid. He had glasses and dark hair with blue eyes. Cute in a stupid sort of way."

"Greyton and Junior. Ok, I'll take care of it."

He didn't say how he planned on doing so, but at least someone was willing to do something. I hugged him back. "Thank you, Finn."

He nodded vaguely. "Go take a hot shower to loosen up. I have some muscle stuff to put on those bruises. I'm going to guess that you don't want to tell Mom and Burt about it?"

Not if my life depended on it. "I would rather not."

Lucky for me, Finn understands keeping secrets these days. "I won't tell anyone."

Maybe it wasn't the best way to handle things, or the healthiest, but it was the way things were. There were still a few things that Finn had told me but no one else, and I kept those. He would keep mine.

I ran a bath and tossed some Epsom salts in. I probably still had some arnica somewhere, which would help reduce the bruising. "Hey, Finn? I'm going to take a bath instead, so if you need to pee, do it now." Because there was no way he was coming in to do it while I was actually bathing. Yes, I know that the toilet and the tub have pipes that never touch each other, but it's still disgusting.

"No, thank you." There was a shuffling as he scooted over to the door. "I'll come and sit here, though. Maybe you can give me the answers through the door."

Nice try. I wasn't going to just give him the answers period, and he knew it. "Not going to happen, Cowboy. How about we work on English instead."

The evil Les Miserable's was over for him, and we were now on to To Kill a Mockingbird. Fortunately, Finn found this one much more palatable then the last, and was actually making pretty good headway on it. He still asked me how to pronounce a word or what one meant every five minutes, but at least he was doing it and not bitching.

"Kurt? What does fettle-is-ic mean?"

I can usually decode Finn's mangled pronunciations, but this one eluded me. "Come again?"

"Fettle-eyes-ic" He tried another pronunciation, but I was still confused.

"Can you spell it for me?" Almost before I got the words out, he was rattling off a string of letters that seemed to have very little to do with the pronunciation he had tried out. "I have no idea. Can you bring the book in here to show me?"

"Ummm…ok." He didn't sound completely sure, but I heard him getting up. He crept in, his eyes anywhere but my body and held out the book. "Left page, in the middle."

I looked over it, keeping one eye on Finn while I did so. As soon as he thought he wasn't being watched, his eyes raked over my body in a way that made my cross my legs in the tub. So he was interested after all. I tried to keep myself under control while scanning down the page. "The word is fatalistic, Finn. It means that someone things that everything happens by fate and we have no free will and choices."

"Oh. That's not very fun." He sat down across from the tub, his back against the wall.

"W-what are you doing?" I was shocked that he was being so calm with me naked just a few feet away and no door between us.

"Sitting down. There's probably going to be a lot of words that I don't get, and it's easier to just show you. Why? Is it weird?"

A little. "I guess not. I'm just surprised that you're comfortable."

"I'm a lot better then I was, you know. I've been working with Samantha a lot and I'm going to get over what he did to me." His tone was reproachful.

"I know." I would have liked to talk about this a little more, but Finn clearly didn't. Expressing himself in words isn't exactly one of his talents, so I would just have to wait until he was ready to do it with actions.

You and me both.

I soaked for another half hour and four additional questions from Finn, before I was ready to get out. I hurt less, and the water was getting cold. "If you're going to sit in here, can you at least hand me my towel?"

Again, he averted his eyes, but he did give me the towel. "Just put on some pants, so I can put the cream on those bruises."

I complied, letting him tend to me although I could have easily done the marks on my front and arm myself. Finn likes being in the caretaker role, and it's a good one for him to fill every once in a while. When he was done he patted my back. "It will feel better soon."

Those words made my eyes sting, because it was the mantra we had been living by for so long. It will be better soon. Finn will be better soon. He won't be like this forever. But when was soon? And what was 'better'? The word itself implied that there was still something more, a 'best' that would never be achieved. Bruises would fade, Finn would talk again, but things would never be exactly the way they had before. Better, not best.

Finn tossed me one of his T-shirts. "Here. That stuff stinks and it stains. I don't care if this shirt gets ruined."

It did stink, but the painful areas were already going blissfully numb. I slipped the shirt on, even though it slipped on one shoulder. "Thank you, Finn."

He had already gone back to the bathroom to wash his hands. "You're welcome. What else happened at school today?"

"Same old same old. Mr. Shue asked about you and Rachel tried to get us to practice on the first day. Like anyone but the Cheerios practice on the first day of school, anyway."

He laughed a little. "Yeah, that sounds right. How come you're not at Cheerios practice?"

Trust him to pick up on that, when I was sure that no one else would. "I'm not going to be joining the Cheerios this year."

"Why? You were good at it, and Mom showed me the award you guys won at Nationals. They couldn't have done that without you."

It was nice to get a compliment, and I felt my face flushing. "That's kind of you to say. I did like being on the Cheerios last year, but this year I want to try something different."

That was the kind way of putting it. The truth was that I had intended to join the Cheerios this year, but there was no way I could manage it with harder school work, the upcoming trial, and Finn and his needs.

"Like what?"

"Like….I don't know, having a boyfriend? Would you really want me to be in practice 7 days a week until 8 or 9 at night? That wouldn't leave a lot of time for you and me."

"That would kind of suck." The quirked eyebrow told me that I wasn't fooling him, but he would let this one go. "But it's cool to think that you want to spend time with me so much."

"You're my boyfriend. There's no one I would rather spend with." No matter how many times I said it, it still felt strange on my lips. It probably felt strange for Finn to hear as well.

"Cool." He gave me another hug. "So are you going to give me my math answers now?"

If the answer was no, the first time, it was likely going to be no this time, too, but I had to admire his persistence. "No. But I will help you. Move your stuff up on the bed."

We lay down side by side, touching at the shoulders, hips and legs. While I read over the lesson, Finn laid one arm across my body, pulling me even closer. He didn't say anything about it, but it still made my heart jump a little. Even if my first day of school had been terrible, I could still come home to this. Before I started, I leaned over and kissed the side of his head.

"Ok, Finn, this is a basic solve for y….."