A/N:

I am the worst person EVER. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I feel so guilty for not updating, especially after all the reviews and messages I've been getting.

So, here's the update! Don't shoot D: It's lonnnng!

((btw. if one Aurelie Bones is still reading this story: I miss you soooo much sweetie, when are you coming back to me on HR?))

Chapter 47

Emmeline, Marlene & Lily

Emmeline Vance

I pull my legs tighter to my chest, the floor is cold and hard, but I don't mind, the wall is cold as well, and hurting my back, but I don't mind that either.

My tears on the photo in my hand, makes it look like it's raining over her face, like she's crying as well.

But she never cried, she was always happy, pink lips forming a smile, blue eyes sparkling and auburn coloured hair dancing in the wind, as she danced around the yard.

Claire had always been the happier sibling, but around her I had been happy too.

"I miss you, sister." I whisper out, just in time to hear footsteps. Lessons must be over and it's time for lunch, but I'm never hungry anymore.

Instead of joining the crowd, I move myself closer into the darkness of the corner, in hope I wont be noticed by the students hurrying from lessons into the great hall, as I clutch the picture to my chest.

Distantly I hear voices, that I recognize.

James, Peter, Remus and Sirius.

My chest tightens and so do the fingers around the picture.

He'll pay.

One day I'll make him pay.

Marlene McKinnon

"Marlene! Marlene! Lene! Marley! Lene! Marlene!"

I sigh, slowing down at first, until I stop myself completely so the out-of-breath brunette can catch up to my fast pace.

"You walk-like-you-are... about to die-" Alice clutches her sides as she finally reaches me.

"I'm sorry, I'm hungry."

"Me too," Alice agrees, still a bit out of breath.

"Mary and Lily have probably already started eating, and I forgot to eat before Quidditch practice."

Alice grins, she's happy that I'm back in the team, I guess.

I guess I am happy too.

It's been a bit awkward though, showing up for practice and just waiting to see if Sirius will kick me off again.

... Sirius ...

I start sighing every time I think about him, nowadays. So I've been avoiding him, as much as I can.

Alice takes a seat next to Lily and I take my seat on the otherside next to Mary.

Mary's doing better now, after the accident, she basically acts like nothing happened and honestly, that's better for me.

I have barely seen Vance for days now, which in all honesty, is great.

She's been in few lessons, but I've had the easiest time ignoring her. She also doesn't sleep in our dorm anymore. Where she spends the night I dont know. Nor do I care.

Her staying away from us, is exactly what we need, so I dont snap her head in two.

"Hey Lene." Mary greets me, poking at her lunch, like usually, but I don't make a comment about it.

"How was Herbology?"

I'm so happy I ditched that subject, it's never been my strong side to take care of plants.

"Boring, but you know…" Mary lowers her voice, tilting her head in my direction. "Avery was there."

"Aha." I respond, my eyebrows raising as I stuff a forkful of food into my mouth, and glance at my now strawberry-blonde friend, she dyed it (again) yesterday.

"Has he talked to you?"

"Not since I talked to Vandever." I respond, trying to sound normal, and ignoring the fact that my heart starts beating faster in my chest at the thought of him.

"He's going to claim his.. part of the deal, sooner or later Marlene." Mary's still whispering and her words make me shiver, but I try my best to ignore it.

"What will come will come." I respond, trying to sound normal and albeit cheery like I don't care, or that I'm not frightened.

"That's what I'm afraid of." Mary agrees, biting into her toast

My eyes flutter to the Slytherin table, as I grab my pumpkin juice.

Avery's eyes meet mine.

He smirks.

He holds his own cup up in my direction, his mouth moves.

Cheers.

Lily Evans

Of all the days I could forget my wand, I pick the day we have a wand-lesson in Charms.

Oh great job Lily.

"Alice, please, please,tell Professor Flitwick I had to deal with some Head Girl business!"

"Oooh, hardcore, she's lying now." Marlene comments, grinning at me.

Mary giggles from her seat. "She's such a badass now."

I give them both glares, before I turn around and walk out from the room, once out I start running as fast as my legs will allow up to the Gryffindor tower.

I cant believe I could be that stupid to forget my wand! I'll be late to class, and of all people Head Girl is not supposed to be late, for anything!

I splutter out the password quickly before I enter the almost empty common room, except for James, and then run up the -

Wait what? - James!?

I stop in my step, in the middle of the stair and turn around, placing my hands on my hips.

"James Potter, why are you not in charms?"

James looks up, from his parchment ane right at me, grinning.

"It's called skipping, Lily."

"But-" I stare at him, blinking a couple of times. "You're head boy, Potter! You can't just skive class!"

James leans back in the chair, looking rather amused. "Have you ever skived?"

I blink, staring at him. "I-No. I'm Head Girl-"

"You haven't been Head Girl for so long."

"Well, skiving is just stupid."

James rolls his eyes. "Whatever, weren't you looking for something? Or are you skiving as well?" he waggles his eyebrows at me.

"No! My wand, I forgot it-"

James grins. "Go and get it then, Head Girl."

I grimace, "Don't call me that."

"Why not? That is your title."

"Just how you say it, it's annoying, Potter."

"Would you rather I called you 'Evans'?"

"Well, the name is Lily."

"You call me 'Potter'."

"I can call you... James."

"Okay, Lily. Go get your wand, and hurry to class."

"You make it sound like I'm just a goodie goodie."

"You are."

"I am not!" I pout, leaning against the wall and giving him a glare.

He shrugs, grinning still and holds up his hands. "I'm just telling it like it is. Have you ever told a lie?"

"I have!" I cry out, resisting the urge to throw something at him, but I can't reach anything anyway.

"You've hardly ever lied, never skipped-"

"OKAY I WILL SKIP WITH YOU."

".. What?"

I slap a hand over my mouth.

"Did Lily Evans just say she would skip with me?" James looks around the room, at a fake crowd, before he stands up. "Ladies and gentlemen! Take pictures!" and then he bows.

"I-" My voice falters.

"Hold your breath, has the lady changed her mind?" James gives me a knowing look.

I can't back down now, not with that look on his face.

"I-Uh. No."

James grins again, walking towards me he offers me his hand. "Let's go then, m'lady. I think outside is the perfect place to skip Charms, on such a sunny day."

Hesitantly I take his hand. What the hell was I agreeing to this for?

Marlene McKinnon

After Charms I decided I needed to clear my head, for just a few moments. Or maybe many.

Honestly, I have no idea what is going on.

Why hasn't Avery come to claim what he wants?

Why hasn't he even talked to me?

Just shared eyecontact with me during lunch?

I shiver again, pointing my broom towards the ground, so I can land.

Clearing my head by flying didn't work, and I'm pretty sure if I dont get down on the ground I'll faint soon from the stress.

As soon as my legs touch the grass I let out a long breath of relief.

The pitch is completely empty, so I have it all for myself, but still I cant focus.

I wipe the sweat from my forehead and then off my hand and onto my shirt.

Get your shit together, McKinnon. The voice inside my head scolds me and I grimace at myself, before I walk fast steps towards the changing room.

I'm sure all I need is a hot shower, I tell myself, turning on the water and letting it drip on my body for a while.

It doesn't help, the thoughts and images fill my head again.

Emmeline.

Blaire.

Avery.

Mulciber.

Mary, screaming.

Sirius.

"Do you love me?"

His question dances around in my head, repeating itself again and again, as I see images of him and me together.

I turn the water off, grabbing the towel and stroll out of the shower room and towards my clothes.

Just get dressed, just get dressed. I continue to talk to myself, trying to soothe myself, because honestly, there's no one left who can do it for me.

I get my skirt on and zip it shut, then the shirt and finally the tie, that I keep lose.

I kneel down on the floor to look for my shoes, that I'm pretty sure I kicked under a bench somewhere, but a noise causes me to freeze.

I look to the side, noticing the door closing again, and two feet infront of me, I look up the persons body, quickly realizing who it is.

"You're not supposed to be in here, it's the girl's locker room." I stand up, not bothering to look for my shoes anymore, and give Sirius a look, trying to keep my voice normal.

He just smirks slightly, like always. "Need help?"

"Help with what?" My voice is a bit snappier than I intended, but then again he's probably used to my snappy tone towards him.

"You were looking for something, on the floor."

Probably my sanity. I say to myself, before I shrug at him and wiggle my toes. "Just my shoes."

He looks around, and it only takes him a second to spot them.

I grimace; of course it would've taken me many minutes but him only seconds, but I wipe the grimace off and replace it with somewhat a smile when he hands each shoe to me.

I let them fall on the floor, before I slip my feet into each one. "Thanks."

He shrugs, and I realize just how close he is to me.

I'm pretty sure we havent been this close to each other since that day when Mary was still in the coma.

Do you love me? My mind screams at me, in his voice.

"What are you here for anyway-" I start to ask him, but he cuts me off.

"Shhh," he whispers out, bringing his hand to my face.

"Si-"

"Shhh," he says again, leaning towards me.

I stand still, mouth shut and silent staring at the dark haired boy - man - infront of me, waiting to see what he'll do.

"I'll never quite understand." He mutters, but before he lets me speak again his lips crash to mine.

I'm surprised, too surprised to do anything for what is probably a whole minute, before I finally relax and let my lips move with his.

But Sirius isn't really the relaxing type, and his arms wrap around my waist and pull me towards his body, groaning as I slam into him, his hands roam up my shirt.

It's so familiar, while so different, it's been so long since we've done this, it's like a wave of electricity going through me as I kiss him back and let my own hands roam over his body.

I know almost every visible scar on his arms, and the scars the shirt hides away from me. I've always liked them; the scars. There's osmething so sexy about them.

I know his face like it's my own, his cheek bones are so familiar to my fingers that I cant resist the urge to let them play with his face, and run into his hair.

Oh, his hair. So dark, so soft.

His eyes are closed, as are mine, but I can still picture them, his perfectly rounded eyeballs, the lovely grey colour that turns dark when he's angry.

His hands go under my arms, as he tugs up, my legs wrap around his waist.

He turns around and staggers with me in his arms towards a wall and leans my back against it.

My fingers are still tangled in his hair, when his fingers trail up my thigh.

But before I can engourage him to just go on with a moan, he's pulling away. Way too early.

"What-" he cuts me off again, by putting a finger over my lips.

He then brings his hand back to my legs and squeezes. "Marlene."

"Sirius." I figure is the best reply and this time he actually lets me reply.

"Do," he leans towards my neck "You." he kisses it once. "Want." again "Me." again "To." he bites down. "Continue?" he finishes his setence by flicking his tongue over the part where he bit down.

"Y-Yes," I reply, twisting his hair around my fingers.

"Then, tell me how you feel."

I freeze up.

"Three words."

No, not again! My mind is screaming again and I feel dizzy.

"Do you-"

"Don't say it!" I scream at him, pulling my fingers from his hair, rougly.

He doesn't flinch, but looks straight at my face, "- love me?"

He's doing again. My mind is spinning as my legs unwrap themselves and he lets me down.

"Answer me." he grabs hold of my arm before I can run away.

I shake myself loose, and his hands drop to his sides.

I stare right back at him, not flinching at his eyes.

Stop playing with me. My mind pleads him, but I wont flinch and beg him for anything.

He cracks first and blinks, I take that as my chance to leave.

I hate you.

I can't force even a single word out, so I just grab my stuff and make a hasty exit out the door.

Ignoring the fact that the whole world seems to be spinning, fast, until it'll crash down and break me with it.

Lily Evans

James decided we would spend our 'skipping time' like he has started to call this stupid thing we're doing, by the lake.

"We're going to enjoy the sunshine!" he claims, pulling me forward.

I'm just busy looking around to see if there's anyone who can spot us and realize we're actually skipping.

"You don't realize the trouble we'd be in if we get caught do you?"

"I've gotten caught loads of times, Lilykins."

"I said you could call me 'Lily' not 'Lilykins'" I remind him, scowling. "Besides, it's worse when we're Head Boy and Head Girl, we're supposed to be punishing those that are-"

"Shhhh, you're ruining the moment. Sit down, enjoy the view, and by that I mean the Lake, even though I know you would have loads of fun oogling at my body."

"I would-"

"Shhh! Evans-Lily-shh!"

"Don't shh-"

"SHHH!"

Again I have to resist the urge to throw something at him, because frankly I have nothing to throw at him but my shoe.

"If you don't stop-"

"Shhh!"

"-Shh-ing-"

"Shhh!"

"-me I will-"

"SHHH"

"-Throw my-"

"Shhh-"

"-shoe at-"

"Shut up!"

"MAKE ME!"

My shoe flies to his head and for a moment he stares at me and then James Potter's lips are on top of mine.

I'm taken by so much shock that I have no bloody idea what to do, I don't bloody know what to do, and before I can try to figure out what exactly to do, he pulls away.

"Sorry," he mutters out, looking from me and running a hand through his hair. "I didn't mean to kiss you - You just said 'make me' and I-"

"That is so cheesy Potter!"

"What is?"

"Me going 'Make me' and you .. you KISSING me!"

"Well you said-"

"You kept shooshing me!"

"You wouldn't shut up!"

"Well your making me didn't work!"

"Well I'm sorry-"

"I FORGIVE YOU!"

"STOP SCREAMING EVANS!"

"STOP TELLING ME TO STOP SCREAMING POTTER!"

"YOu CLEARNLY HAVENT FORGIVEN ME!"

"I SAID I FORGAVE YOU!"

"THEN WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING?"

"SO YOU WILL MAKE ME STOP!"

That strikes him silent, but his mouth still hangs open.

"What.. what.. How .. What do you mean by that?" he finally manages out, staring at me, with wide eyes and a half open mouth.

"Like this, Potter, like this." and this time it's not a shoe that I'm throwing at him, but myself and my lips on his.

A/N: Obviously the word 'Shhh' is a word to describe this chapter.

Here is my ramble apologizing AN:

I've been very busy, and I'm a MEAN PERSOn. I'm sorry D:

I've recently joined and acting club, and we're putting up Romeo and Juliet, and yours truly is playing both Mercuti and Paris! I must be one manly girl. … God I hope not.

And that my dears, is a LOOOOOT of work. But but but I'll still try to update, i have break days and yadiyadiyadi and then it's easter soon and yadiyadiyadi but THEN it's test week and I'll die. But you know fun stuff.

I still have a bit of writers block, probably because I haven't written in a while, so forgive me if the chapter sucked.

I know what sucked: THE WAIT.

And I suck.

So I'm sorry. you guys are beautiful.