DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN CAMP ROCK OR ITS ORIGINAL CHARACTERS, NOR DO I OWN ANY SONGS OR QUOTES THAT MAY APPEAR IN THIS FIC!
Chapter 11:
Nate's P.O.V.:
Bobby's shop:
"So stupid!" I yelled to myself, as I walked back into Bobby's shop and plopped down on the floor.
"Hey, what's going on?" Bobby asked, coming from behind the counter.
"I messed up."
"Messed what up?"
"Everything! Everything was fine and I stupidly decided to kiss her and now everything is messed up! I messed up our friendship. Things are going to be weird and she's not going to talk to me!" I was on the verge of a freak-out and didn't even completely understand why. Yes you do dummy, you screwed everything up!
"Alright dude just calm down. You're working yourself up before you know what happening," Bobby said calmly. You can always count on him to have the level head. "Just wait for a few minutes and see if she comes back. If not, try calling her and make sure she's alright. Don't go chasing after her right now 'cause that'll only make it worse especially if she just needed a minute to think. Just wait." With that, he got up and headed back towards the counter.
Just wait! I should have gone with her... I should have never kissed her like that. What the hell was I thinking?!
Just then the door to the shop opened and in walked Mitchie.
"Hey," she greeted with a small timid smile.
"Hey," I said quietly, as though trying not to scare her.
"Can we talk?" she asked pointing to the door. I felt like I could puke, but I manned up and nodded anyways.
"Bye guys," Bobby said from the counter. He gave me a reassuring nod as I opened the door for Mitchie.
I could hear Mitchie take a deep breath as I walked side by side with her. It's now or never.
"I'm sorry Mitchie," came out of my mouth at the same time as her apology to me.
"What are you apologizing for?" We asked the other in confusion.
"I should have never kissed you like that. It freaked you out and I don't even know if you like me that way and-," I said firing off into the longest apology of my life.
"What? Nate no, you didn't freak me out. I freaked myself out. I over thought things and... There was nothing wrong with you kissing me it's just... I thought something that I shouldn't have and I got scared... and I shouldn't have run out that way..."
"Mitch," I said grabbing her hand to stop her. The contact shocked both of us for a second and we stood in silence for a moment before I continued. "Mitch, it's alright. You had every right to leave. I should have gone about that in a different way and I didn't mean to scare you or anything it's just... I like you. Ever since we met at the end of camp, I feel like we've clicked and I just thought you felt the same way but I guess... Anyway, I'm sorry." I ended lamely not wanting to make things worse though it seems I already did from the way she wasn't saying anything.
"Mitch? You still in there?" I asked after a minute of her still not saying anything. You've officially fucked it up! "I can take you home now if you want."
"You like me?" I could just barely make out her words, they were so quiet.
"What?" I was confused.
"You like me?" she asked again a little louder.
"Of course I like you Mitch. There's nothing not to like. You're smart, talented, kind, caring, beautiful... You're you."
"Are you sick?" she asked reaching to feel my forehead.
"What? No Mitch," I laughed. "I'm fine. I know what's going on, I know what I said and I mean it," I said looking at her, trying my hardest to convey my sincerity.
"This makes no sense...The guys had something to do with this!" she muttered to herself, getting that cute crinkle in her nose that she usually got when she got upset.
"This makes perfect sense to me. No one but me and you had anything to do with my liking you. I like you because you're you," he said simply.
"I said that out loud?" She asked her cheeks flaming red. "But I... We don't match Nate," she said shaking her head, the crinkle in her nose becoming more defined as she stared at the ground.
"Hey, talk to me. You're not saying something," I tried to get her to explain what was wrong. A tear fell down her cheek. What did I do?!
"Mitchie?"
"I like you too, but we don't work," she finally looked at me and I could feel my heart begin to hurt seeing the pain and sadness on her face.
"What do you mean?"
"Look at us! You're Nate Gray; you can have any girl you want! The only guy I've ever gotten to look at me with any type of interest is a creep! I have a three year old daughter! Think about how that would make you look! God knows I have issues that I can't even begin to address personally, let alone try to deal with in a relationship. You don't deserve that! We wouldn't work and I don't want to wait until I get attached, for you to realize it and leave," she said quietly sniffling, as she finally looked at me. I could see the sincerity and the hurt in her eyes.
"I would never do that to anyone, especially not to you. If I felt that we wouldn't work, for any reason, I wouldn't have opened my mouth. Look Mitch, the only one who can decide what you want is you. I like you, I really like you. I think we could go somewhere with our relationship, but if you don't think you want to go to that level, that's fine. I'll take just being friends, just don't shut me out," I pleaded wiping the tears from her cheeks. I wanted to talk more about this but I could see she was upset so I just let it go. I'll convince her somehow.
"I need to think. I really do like you I just can't... not right now," she pleaded with her eyes for me to understand.
"I get it. I'm always going to be here for you for whatever. If you decide you want to try we can. I can wait until then," I promised. I'll always wait for you. "Come on, let's head back inside. It's getting late; we should both probably head home."
We grabbed our things, said bye to Bobby, and I drove Mitchie home in silence.
Mitchie's P.O.V.:
The entire ride home I kept trying to think of ways to tell him that I didn't mean what I'd said and accept moving on to the next level with him, but I couldn't find the right words. I know I can trust him, I just can't trust myself enough to trust him.
"Thanks for the ride... and today," I said getting out of the car.
"You're welcome. Thanks for coming. I'll talk to you later," he said with a small wave.
"Yeah," I agreed dejectedly as I shut the door and went inside.
"Stupid," I grumbled as I kicked my shoes at the door.
"If you hate it that much, we'll replace it. There's no need for the abuse," dad said laughing as he walked passed me into the living room.
"It's not the door, I had a bad day is all...I don't really want to talk about it," I said, going for the stairs.
"Mitchie!" Dad called before I could make it.
"Yes?"
"Are you okay?" I knew he could tell I was upset, but by the tone of his voice I knew he meant something else.
"I'm fine dad. I'm just mad at myself. I did something stupid and don't know how to fix it."
"Do you need my help?"
"No, it's personal thing,"
"I'm here if you want to talk. Your mom's upstairs playing with Sarah if you'd rather talk with her."
"Thanks dad." I called as I walked down the hall to Sarah's room to see both her and mom asleep in a pile of Sarah's teddy bears with her favorite book, "James and the giant peach", in their arms. I couldn't help but take a picture and the flash woke mom up.
"Hey sweetheart. How'd everything go?" She asked as she sat up trying to keep from waking Sarah.
"Here," I offered as I picked Sarah up and carried her to her bed. We both walked from the room and silently shut the door.
"It was okay. We got the song for the duet done. We just have to present it and start recording."
"Oh really? That was fast. I really am proud of you and how far you've come with your music. You're so in your element, I can't wait to see what happens," mom said as she sat on my bed next to me.
"I guess so," I said with a sigh.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
"Things with Nate..."
"What thing with Nate? I didn't know there was a thing," mom said confused.
"There's not really a thing, it's just that we're really close already and we hung out this afternoon and we wrote the duet together. Everything was fine until..." I tried to explain but wasn't able to finish.
"Oh Mitchie, what's wrong?" Mom asked as she leaned over to pull me into her arms. I didn't realize it had started, but I was crying again!
"He's changing everything and doesn't know it. We work great together and... We just click, but I can't... I don't want to be hurt," I finished weakly, sinking further into her arms.
"Okay, Mitchie start from the beginning okay? We'll figure this out."
So, I told her everything that happened from the time she left to me getting home.
"Everything was perfect and I just couldn't... I messed up!" I cried.
"No you didn't Mitchie. I'm sure Nate understands and with how close you guys are I'm sure he feels just as upset right now. I think you're both looking at this from the wrong angle," she said as she turned so we were looking directly at each other. "You're scared of him being on a different level than you and leaving you behind, he might be scared of you thinking that very thing and not knowing how to show you he cares." She paused and looked as though she was trying to find the right words. "I've noticed you've lived behind these walls ever since everything happened with Mica and I think now that there's a chance of someone taking those walls down, you're scared to find out what's on the outside and if it's safe. That's the scariest part about love, honey, but you will never figure it out unless you let him in. You don't have to break the walls completely, just build a doorway for him to get in. Once you do that, you can decide if you think he's worth the risk," she said giving me one last hug as she got up and went for the door. "Just think about it."
After mom left, I sat in my bed for I don't know how long, thinking about everything; every conversation, every joke, every song, every laugh... everything. The biggest con would have to be all of the attention. I'm judged on a daily basis by the whole school, can I handle the whole world's scrutiny? Can our relationship stand up to all of it? The pros would have to be I would be happy, I'd have someone outside of my little group to talk to and understand.
I sighed as I got up from my bed still thinking whether it'd be worth the risk. I don't know. I hadn't realized how late it was until I looked over at my clock to see 1:45 glaring at me.
I missed dinner. I thought as I got up and plopped on my keyboard bench, plugged my headphones in, and began to toy with the keys.
I can't sleep tonight
Wide awake and so confused
Everything's in line
But I am bruised
I need a voice to echo
I need a light to take me home
I kinda need a hero
Is it you?
I never see the forest for the trees
I could really use your melody
Baby I'm a little blind
I think it's time for you to find me
Can you be my nightingale?
Sing to me
I know you're there
You could be my sanity
Bring me peace
Sing me to sleep
Say you'll be my nightingale
...
Once I could no longer hear the final note resonating through the headphones, I put them down with a sigh. We need to fix this. I decided as I grabbed my phone from my bed and dialed Nate's number before I could talk myself out of it.
I got more scared by the second ring and was about to hang up when I heard a groggy, out of breath Nate on the other end.
"Hello?"
Nate's P.O.V.:
The ride home was the most frustrating ride of my life. Mitchie and I said absolutely nothing on the way to her house and I wanted so badly to try to get her to talk to me again, but I just couldn't find the words. The entire drive home I thought about the day we'd had and kicked myself again for being a dumb ass and kissing her. I also celebrated at the fact she liked me too. Maybe not everything is ruined just yet. I just have to tread very carefully and try to get her to realize I'm not going to hurt her.
Jase and Shane were out somewhere when I got home so I just decided to sit in my room and mope. How am I supposed to fix this?
I plopped on my bed and looked around my room as though that would provide me an answer. My eyes landed on my guitar sitting in its stand by my bed. Why not? I thought as I grabbed it and began to pluck at the strings. I thought about all of the time Mitchie and I had spent together and how I felt. We know each other well enough already... maybe we just need to show a little more. I thought as the words began to run through my head and I began to sing.
...
You might think that I'm a fool
For falling over you
So tell me what I can do to prove to you
That it's not so hard to do?
Give love a try, one more time
'Cause you know that I'm on your side
Give love a try, one more time
I had no clue what else to do. I wanted to call Mitchie, but I didn't think it would be a good idea and I didn't feel like leaving the apartment again so I just put my guitar back in its stand and grabbed my iPod off of my dresser. I fell asleep sometime after and was awakened by my phone ringing. MGK's "Invincible" blared through the speaker; Mitchie's ring tone. I gracefully flopped off of my bed trying to reach my phone and answered on the third ring.
"Hello," I answered trying to catch my breath.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"Oh yeah, I just fell off my bed. What's up?"
"I know it's a little late..." I looked at the clock at this. It read 2:20.
"Is something wrong?"
"No, not really... I've been thinking and really need to talk to you."
"Uh, s-sure we can do that. When?" I asked shocked. I could dance right about now.
"Is 11 tomorrow- well, later today good for you?" She asked and I could hear the nerves and smile in her voice and that made me smile in her voice.
"Yeah, I'll see you then."
"Great, see you then. Have a good night Nate."
"Good night Mitch."
I couldn't help but let out a small cheer of happiness as I hung up the phone. I can fix this or at least make it better!
Mitchie's P.O.V.:
Three days later (Thursday):
Things wound up having to be moved due to conflict of schedule for Nate, so I hadn't spoken to him since the last phone call very early Tuesday morning. He texted the day before to let me know he was finally free today and I couldn't be happier to finally have the chance to fix things. I was so wired; I got up five minutes before my alarm and ran for the shower. Hopefully we can fix this somehow, someway.
Once again I didn't need to worry about what to wear. After I hung up with Nate, I had nothing to do so I decided to organize my clothes and found that I had a bunch of clothes from birthdays and such that I didn't wear for some odd reason. I decided to wear something different so, after blow drying my hair, I put on the thin long sleeved peach colored shirt I got from my cousin and the light blue jeans that Sierra bought me last year because "they made my butt look good", with some black flats. I can still feel the blush in my cheeks from Michael's agreeing with her. I got Sarah up and dressed with little difficulty and we headed downstairs for breakfast.
Dad had to head into work early so he took Sarah with him to drop off at school. It was just us.
"Are you alright?" Mom asked as I helped her clean the dishes.
"I'm good. I'm a little nervous; I'm going to go meet up with Nate" I told her as I dried the dishes she passed off.
"Okay... so, did you get a chance to think about things yesterday?" She asked trying to sound sly by slipping the question in.
"Yes mom," I answered laughing a little.
"And?" She asked impatiently.
"And, I decided to try to talk to him and just let things come as they may."
"Oh sweetheart, that's great! He really does seem like a nice boy and he makes you happy," she said with a smile.
"Yeah, he does. Thanks for the breakfast."
I dried the last plate, and headed back upstairs to organize Sarah's room, though I knew that it'd go straight to waste once she got home. It didn't take long, so I headed back downstairs to stare at the T.V. until it was time to go.
The doorbell rang a few hours later, and mom and I both rose from the couch.
"I'll get it. You go get your things," mom directed, already headed for the door.
I ran up the stairs two at a time to get my bag, double checking to be sure I had my phone. I looked toward the song and thought better of it last second before heading back downstairs. When I got back, Nate and my mom were sitting on the couch talking.
"Hey," I greeted Nate as I entered.
"Hey," he replied, standing.
"Well, I'll see you kids later," mom said as she got up and headed towards the stairs. "Good luck," she said giving me a look as she waved goodbye.
"Bye mom," I said laughing.
"Bye Mrs. Torres," Nate called.
"Connie!" She yelled back. We both laughed.
"She is crazy," I laughed as Nate opened the door for me.
"Nah, she's just different."
"Sure, we'll go with that. "
"You ready to go?" He asked buckling in.
"Absolutely."
Though we both wanted to talk, the whole ride was spent in silence. We even walked in silence as we entered Bobby's shop. Bobby wasn't there and I stopped confused.
"Shop's closed; Bobby's headed out of town for an emergency. He let me have the spare for now. Come on," Nate said grabbing a hold of my hand leading me towards his and the boys room.
"Everything alright?" I asked as he motioned for me to take a seat as we entered.
"Yeah. His sister's having a baby," he answered and we both sat in silence unsure of how to start the real topic of conversation for a minute before we both started at once.
"I wanted to talk about yesterday... " I motioned for him to go first. "We said we would take time to think about things and I did..." he trailed off. "I think you're right."
I have no clue why but when he said that, my heart began to hurt. I knew he would realize it eventually, but I was kind of still hoping he would give it try, give us a try.
"I understand," I said quietly as I rose to leave. I could feel the sting of tears at the back of my eyes and I wasn't about to cry in front of him, not again, not because of this.
"Hey Mitch," he said gently grabbing a hold of my hand. That little shock of electricity from yesterday happened again and I pulled away.
"No, Nate it's alright. I get it."
"No Mitch. That's not what I mean," he said grabbing a hold again, pulling me back toward the chair.
"I mean that you were right, we are different, in a lot of ways... but that's just another reason we get along so well. I mean, who wants to spend all day with someone who's just like them? You might as well spend the day alone talking to yourself and I'm rambling," he stopped and took a deep breath.
"Look, what I'm trying to say is, I get your point in feeling the way you do. I don't agree with the way you see yourself but that's just something we'll have to work on... anyway, I get why you don't want to move into a relationship yet. To be honest I'm kind of scared of the way I feel, too. We work so well with our friendship. I like the harmony we have, I don't want that to be ruined if something were to go wrong."
"It's just that...you're you, you know? I may not see you that way, but the reality is you're Nate Gray, international superstar, one third of one of the greatest bands to ever exist in music, a guy who has hundreds of girls literally throwing themselves at you with offers of marriage for God's sake. Outside of my friends no one's ever shown that they care about me as much as you have. It's always been just us and suddenly we go to camp and you show up and it's like this fairy tale dream where suddenly everything is going right for me. Nothing in my life has ever been completely right even before Sarah and now it's like all of my dreams are coming true. I just... I can't help feeling like this comes with strings attached and I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop." I finally admitted.
"Well I can tell you now, there are no strings, but if you really feel that strongly about it, we can just remain friends." He said with a smile giving my hand, which I'd forgotten he was still holding, a squeeze.
"I'd like that. We can keep the perfect harmony going." I smiled up at him. He got that look he got when he had an idea.
"What?" I inquired.
"That'd be a good song."
"It would wouldn't it?" I agreed after thinking about it.
"Come on," he said as he pulled me up towards the piano. He hummed a melody the whole time and began to tap the keys as we sat. We played around with the keys and made jokes as we came up with lines and a few hours-longer-than-necessary later we had the song complete.
When I first saw you didn't know what to think
But something about you is so interesting
I could see me and you being best friends
The kind of friends that finish each other's sentences
When I can't think of the right words to say
I just sing oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Come on and harmonize with my melody
And we'll sing oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Ain't it a perfect harmony
I would have never thought I'd be here with you
To start a friendship that is so brand new
It's so amazing I have to say
Never met someone that had so much in common with me
Now I can look into your eyes all day
And just say oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
I wanna harmonize with your melody
And we'll sing oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Ain't it a perfect harmony
Sometimes in your lifetime you
look and you search for someone just to care
Look around and it was there
And we didn't need to go no where
When I can't think of the right words to say (right words to say)
I just sing oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Come on and harmonize with my melody
And we'll sing oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Ain't it a perfect harmony
You got me (I got you)
I got you (You got me)
Yeah you got me (I got you)
A perfect harmony
"That is great!" I cheered. Just before he could say anything, my stomach growled loudly.
"Yes it was, but your stomach thinks otherwise. Come on, we can go grab some lunch." Nate helped me up and I grabbed the sheet music.
We ate out from the restaurant I'd run into the other day. Danni wasn't there. I laughed as we walked back to the car and started to tell him about it when my phone rang. I looked at it to see that it was Michael. Nate nodded at me to go ahead and answer.
"Hey Mikey," I greeted.
"Hey. We're on our way to the movies, you wanna come?"
"Sure why not?" I agreed laughing. "Nate and I were just headed back to my house, so I'll meet you guys there and we can head out."
"Nate huh? Ooohh!" He taunted. I could hear the others join in in the background, Jared being the loudest.
"Stop it! You're being loud and obnoxious," I hissed, trying to keep Nate from hearing. I failed; he was laughing away as he started the car.
"Oh come on! Let us have our fun," Jared complained. "Tell Nate boy we say hi."
"Hi guys," Nate called to them.
"Guy's we gotta go," I said trying to get them off the phone.
"Go where? Alone with a boy; I think not young lady!" Sierra said in a snooty voice that belonged on an old rickety woman from the 16th century. The others laughed.
"Bye guys!" Nate called as he hit end on my phone. "You call your mom crazy compared to them?"
"Hmm... tough question," I joked. We laughed and talked the whole way back to my house.
"That was fun," I said as we pulled into the drive.
"Yeah it was. Thanks for talking with me," he said smiling at me.
"Thanks for listening and understanding. I'll see you later." He waved as I went inside and I could hear him pulling out of the driveway.
There are 4,157 words in this chapter excluding the author's notes and little "markers" (P.O.V.'s, location, days, etc.). The songs used in this chapter are "Nightingale" by Demi Lovato, "Introducing me" b Nate Gray (played by Nick Jonas) from "Camp Rock 2: Final Jam", and "Perfect Harmony" by my (I wish) husband, Max Schneider (Charlie Prince) and Keke Palmer (Kadee Worth) from the great Nickelodeon movie "Rags". We're getting into the suspenseful aspect of relationship in the story now and things are a little rocky for me on this. This chapter was something completely different from what it is now and when it was first written so I apologize if anything is confusing to you or doesn't make sense. Feel free to point it out to me. I also apologize for getting a little song happy. I create a soundtrack for every story or idea I have. I am very music oriented and felt like I should have some of those songs in my fics. Other P.O.V.'S will be incorporated in the next chapter and I'll try to edit this and see how everything flows before next week. Remember to review! I can't improve if I don't know what to fix.