He'd once entertained the idea that the stupidest thing he'd ever done was allow Hinamori Momo to keep a series of debilitating photos from his youth, and while he still considered that pretty damn stupid, it no longer hit the top of the list.
Sitting here, stuffed in between his vice-captain and a stack of suitcases and backpacks, listening to Kurosaki Isshin sing along with the radio with no regard whatsoever to the fact that he was completely off-key, Hitsugaya longed for sweet, merciful death.
He knew he should have stood by his decision to decline the invitation. The Annual Kurosaki Camping Trip™ (complete with trademark, as proven by the pamphlet Isshin had given him, with a completely straight face as if it were the most normal thing in the world) was not his idea of fun. Stuck in the middle of nowhere for who knew how long, sweltering in front of a fire while swatting away bugs and being coated in dirt was supposed to be entertaining?
Hitsugaya didn't get it.
He supposed it was Yuzu's fault for acting so excited about the whole thing. She'd invited him, and her eyes had been so full of hope that his initial emphatic "no" had caught in his throat.
And when Matsumoto had caught the fever, grinning and nodding and saying that she never got the chance to see the glory of nature and that this would be a lot fun, he'd slumped his shoulders and finally nodded.
It was a sad fact of life that Matsumoto could get just about anything out of him...and with Yuzu on her team, that was it. No contest.
"Oh, come on, Taichou!" Matsumoto said with a smile. "You don't get out often enough, anyway. This will be a chance for you to relax. Out with the trees, and the wild animals, sleeping under the stars, a nice warm fire at night...it'll be great!"
"Sorry, Matsumoto," Hitsugaya said with a scowl, "but I'm with Ichigo. This is a bad idea and I'd much rather be doing something else. Something more entertaining. Like peeling my skin off and bathing in salt. This is the last time I let you talk me into anything."
Yuzu, who had been talking animatedly with a mildly interested Karin (if only because her sister's chatter was at least less of a headache than Isshin's cacophony), turned and looked at him. "Don't worry, Hitsugaya-niichan! It'll be fun, you'll see! There's lots of stuff to do there. I'll show you."
Hitsugaya rolled his eyes. "...I'm not your 'niichan,' and it's not fair to use that against me..." he muttered under his breath.
And it wasn't fair. She called him that with such sincerity that his conscience wouldn't let him defy her whenever she used it. She honestly considered Hitsugaya a part of her family, for some reason or another, and that was a responsibility that he, as much as he'd have liked to, couldn't ignore.
When they finally reached the campsite two agonizing hours later, Hitsugaya immediately leapt out of the car and walked off to find a bathroom. Not because he needed to use it, but because Yuzu and Matsumoto couldn't follow him in there.
...Well, okay. He had his doubts about his vice-captain. She had no sense of modesty.
When he came back, he assisted in setting up camp (albeit with about as much enthusiasm as a dead crab). Ichigo gathered wood for the fire, Isshin picked out food from the ice chests for their dinner, and Matsumoto talked with the girls.
Rukia should be here, Hitsugaya thought with a scowl. She's a part of this psychological bear-trap too. Where the hell is she, anyway?
He was thrown out of his thoughts when Isshin and Ichigo began arguing about who should chop the wood. Ichigo maintained that he had gone out and found it; Isshin should do the chopping. Isshin argued that Ichigo had done next to nothing to prepare for the trip, and needed to contribute.
The argument soon came to blows, as it often did with those two, and Hitsugaya soon grew annoyed with it. He got up out of the lawn chair he had claimed as his own, grabbed the axe, and went over to the pile.
He lost himself in the task of chopping the logs into shape for the fire pit. He put all his pent-up frustration into it. It felt good. The physical exertion took his mind off the fact that he was going to hate the next few days. He supposed it wasn't so much the camping itself that was the problem...but the various activities listed out in the A.K.C.T. pamphlet that Isshin would no doubt force him into and that he wouldn't be able to back out of because The Evil Ones wouldn't let him.
He soon began working up a sweat (Ichigo had gathered enough wood to last them the entire trip, and it was tough to chop through), and decided to remove his coat and shirt so as not to get them any dirtier than they already were.
He didn't notice that Isshin and Ichigo had stopped arguing, or that Matsumoto was watching him rather intently. He didn't hear Karin comment on how muscular he was for his age, nor did he hear his vice-captain's decidedly pleased agreement on the point.
He just concentrated on his job.
To make it easier and more entertaining, he pretended that each log was Aizen's head, and each time the blade fell it made his sadistic side grin with pleasure. Sometimes he would change things up and substitute Aizen for Tousen or one of the arrancar.
By the time he finished, all the wood was chopped, his body was covered in a layer of sweat and dirt, and his hands ached. He groaned as he stretched, ran an arm over his forehead, and sat back down.
"Uh...thanks?" Isshin said, a confused expression on his face.
"Yeah, Hitsugaya...uh...thanks," Ichigo added. "You, uh...didn't have to do that, ya know."
Hitsugaya shrugged. "Figured I'd speed things along."
It was then that he noticed the other three pairs of eyes on him.
"...What?"
"Do you...work out or something?" Karin wondered.
Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "Something," he said. "Why?"
"I've never seen a kid with muscles like that," Yuzu said.
"You look good like that, Taichou," Matsumoto said with a wink. "Never realized you were so...developed."
Hitsugaya looked down at himself. "It's not exactly impressive, you know," he said. "It's not like I'm...buff or something."
"Works for me," Matsumoto said, grinning.
The boy captain's eyes widened slightly. "What...did you just...?"
Matsumoto didn't answer, but the grin stayed on her face.
"Ooooh..." Yuzu said, amusement sparkling in her eyes. "Uh-oh..."
Isshin, on the same wavelength as his daughter, chuckled and flashed Hitsugaya a thumbs-up.
Ichigo groaned and rolled his eyes. "You two just realized this?"
"Yeah," Karin added with a nod. "Took you guys long enough. It's pretty obvious."
"Hey!" Hitsugaya snapped. "Enough of the commentary on my love life, thank you!"
"Your...what, Taichou?"
His face turned red. "Uh...I...I mean, uh..."
He stood up and walked (too quickly) out into the trees.
"Where are you going, Shiro-chan?" Matsumoto called out with a laugh. "I wanna hear more about this love life of yours!"
"Shut up! I don't have one! You heard me wrong!"
Matsumoto's grin widened, and she glanced at the Kurosaki family. "...Thanks for inviting me, too, you guys. I think this trip is going to be a lot of fun."
The mischievous gleam in her gray eyes would have made Hitsugaya turn as white as a sheet.
/\
I just got back from a camping trip on the coast, and I think all of my various stories will have a camping and/or nature theme for a while. It's fresh in my mind. Hence, I figured I'd do this. I'm not sure what exactly the genre for this one would be, but I like it. Hope you do, too.