I own nothing but a lemony mind and a laptop.
Let me know if you spot an error.
Jared Cameron
The thudding metronome of sneakers on asphalt flooded over my body and I let the rhythm tune itself with my entire being, mingling with my heartbeat and leading my pulse. My breathing slowly escalated as I made yet another lap and realised I'd have to stop soon.
Homeroom, I haven't been in the last three years. I used to have homeroom with her but they pulled me out on formal request of my mom. I think that's the only thing she's ever done that upset me. I have ADHD; attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder. My mum got so fed up of the letters home - Jared cannot be controlled, Jared refuses to cooperate, Jared is a general fuck up - that she wrote to tell them all about my "condition" and ever since then every morning, instead of homeroom I have the track all to myself, to run away all my bad behaviour… apparently. I don't need it anymore, I'm not the immature little boy I was back then, but I still enjoy it.
I sat through math and let my mind wander, my thoughts immediately on her. I pulled out my notepad and flipped to the back.
1: She swears, constantly.
2: She has an attached bodyguard.
3: Paul wants more than anything, to throw her a bone.
4: She always smells like cinna-
My last point was cut off by a book slamming down on the desk. I looked up into the eyes of Mr. Lucas and slowly covered my latest list with my forearm. Probably for the best; if I'm being honest I didn't have many more points for that list.
I hate Kim Connweller. I hate her with a passionate burning. But I am a 17 year old boy. Sometimes my nether regions confuse my hatred for attraction and I find myself making a different kind of list. The kind I had made yesterday. The kind I knew I would ball up and throw in the trash the next time she irritated me.
1: Her bottom lip sits just slightly off center.
Next was History, I picked up my bag, keeping my notepad open and slowly wandering down the hall.
2: Her eyelashes are so, insanely long.
"Here, kid." I picked up the scattered papers and books of a small boy in front of me and grinned at him, he looked at me like I was about to pummel his head with my feet, but saw my face and let a tentative smile slip as he mumbled words of thanks and tottered off to what was probably one of his first lessons here. When I straightened up and tried to proceed she was stood directly in front of me, grinning like that fucking cat from Cheshire, wherever that is.
3: Her teeth are perfectly straight and white, except her left canine, which chipped when we were 8 and she fell off a swing.
What do I do? She's just smiling like some sort of demented Barbie right in front of me and she's so gorgeous I just want to pick her up and wrap her around me and kiss the smile right off her face.
4: Her voice is deep and husky, but perfectly clear, and always so quiet.
I huffed and side stepped around her, when I glanced back she still had her back to me and I watched her just long enough to see her shoulders fall and her hair jolt forwards slightly as her head fell about an inch, some strange instinct in me wanted to go back and apologise and hug her until she forgot why she was sad and just clung to me.
5: Her hair is wavy. And swings right past her elbows.
I sat in my seat in History and she came to sit next to me, her smell enveloped me and I inhaled butterscotch and cinnamon all through the 45 minutes we were in close proximity, trying to get her under my skin, to keep her with me as some permanent fixture forever.
6: She smells absolutely fucking delicious.
I closed my eyes and remembered back to 6-year-old me, trying to banish teenage, hormonal Jared so that I could concentrate on class.
"My favourite thing! By Jared Cameron."
I heard some people laughing but Mrs. Hillard glared at them like my mum does when I tell her friends that we hate their cooking.
"My favourite thing has big brown eyes.
My favourite thing always wears nice clothes.
My favourite thing never mixes up the crayons.
My favourite thing is very good at drawing elmaphants.
My fav-"
"At drawing what, Jared?" Mrs. Hillard asked me.
"Elmaphants! With the hoses!"
She smiled at me. "Of course, sorry, carry on."
I sighed at her and went back to my paper
"My favourite thing is very little.
My favourite thing eats butterscotch pudding.
My favourite thing is-" I was interrupted again.
But this time it was by crying, loud, shrieking cries. And everyone in the room laughing, the whole room laughing at my presentation and pointing. I was so humiliated. Kimberley was crying at my presentation that I wrote especially for her and everyone else was pointing and laughing at me.
Stuff like that sticks with a kid! I never lived it down. I went home that night and made my mom help me write a new list: My WORST THING! By Jared Cameron.
The bell rang and I leapt from my seat and darted down the hall to the cafeteria. Joe and Paul were already there, their heads together, probably planning some scheme to get them laid.
"Hey, what's going on?"
Joe looked up, then looked back to Paul "Jared hasn't hosted for a while!"
"What? Yes I have! I hosted for, uhm, well we did Easter at my mom's!"
Both guys stared at me for what felt like ages, both completely straightfaced.
"Dude it's hallowe'en." Joe said.
"You're hosting." Agreed Paul. Fuck. Hallowe'en was the worst night to have to host! The party always got TP'ed and no one ever stuck around to help clean up like they promised they would. I sighed.
"Fine. Nothing huge. What's this year's theme?" We threw a lot of parties. Paul's dad worked on the oil rigs so he was never home and, now that I thought about it, probably didn't even know we frequently destroyed his house. Joe's mum was… well, let's just say she was absent for 80% of the week, and Kim lived with her brother and her grandma, so she hosted the least, and we all let her off the hook since she doesn't drink so whenever the cops bust a party she's our getaway vehicle.
"Hey guys, yeah Halloween's coming up. What're the plans coz last year was fucking awesome but this year I think you need to be giving people incentive." She said enthusiastically as she dropped her tray to the table.
"Hey Kim." I said, smiling. Everyone stopped what they were doing and slowly turned to look at me.
She beamed at me, looking slightly confused "hey Jared." She replied softly. I realised what I'd done and dropped my smile instantly, shoving practically an entire apple in my mouth, she chuckled quietly, shook her head to herself and turned back to the boys.
"Singles party." She said.
Kimberley Connweller
He was in my homeroom for the first two years of school but after that he disappeared, of course it didn't take long for everyone to find out where he went; we're teenagers.
The whole idea of it thrilled me, the thought that he was this untameable beast of a boy that had to run lap after lap of the track just so that the adults of this place could handle him throughout the day.
I fantasised about being able to tame him, about being the one other person in the world he could relate to, that we could be unique together, the ultimate oxymoronic relationship. I already know how odd I am, that I don't look like any of the other girls around here, that the guys only see my chest. But he'd see me. If I let him I bet he'd catch on to me in an instant, if I could let my guard down for just a second.
But I can't. I won't. I tried once, didn't go down well, not happening again.
I shuddered as I remembered the past occasions of rejection from Jared, back when I vowed I would stop moping about being overweight and just get on with losing weight, that I would stop settling for second best, and start pushing through the queue so I could have first pick of whatever I wanted in my life.
So I did, I lost the weight and I got the attention, I always had the personality but now it shone through. I just never quite managed to get the boy.
I walked down the hall with Lily after first period and noticed a small boy drop all of his things on the floor near History, I was closer to the door than the boy but I rushed over there to help him out, he looked young, new. Before I could get there, he did. He picked up the boys things and helped him gather them up, grinning all the while and murmuring encouraging things to the poor child, who was so stunned to be helped so nicely by the gigantic form in front of him he just smiled and practically ran off. I couldn't pull my lips down from the grin they'd settled themselves into.
He looked up and straight at me. The grin on his face faded.
Stop leering at him like you're Hannibal Lecter after lent, and just say "hey, that was really nice of you" then maybe he'll stop assuming you're a complete and utter fuckwit and you'll be able to get somewhere with your blatantly fail-tastic plan of winning him over…
No?
Maybe tomorrow then, for now, just stand there and grin at him like the lovesick little girl you are until he assumes you're completely loose in the head and walks away.
He huffed in front of me and walked past.
There. Now regain stable mental processes…
Good Girl.
I squeezed my eyes shut after he'd gone past, feeling the despair, humiliation and embarrassment wash over me as my shoulders slumped and I inwardly groaned.
History was the same as always. You'd think being my only class with him that maybe, just maybe, I might get some quality 'stare at the gorgeous hunk beside you' time but no! He takes it all! He sits through my entire 45 minutes glaring at my left temple and trying to laser me to death with his pupils.
He ran out of there as fast as his legs could move and headed for lunch, I noticed he'd left his beloved, tatty reporter's notepad on the desk so I picked it up for him, slipped it in my bag and followed the slowly filing students out of the room. There was only one seat left at our table in the cafeteria and it was next to him. Oh well.
"Hey guys, yeah Hallowe'en's coming up. What're the plans coz last year was fucking awesome but this year I think you need to be giving people incentive." I said as I sat down, just to make sure my mouth wasn't free to do what it wanted to, which was just lick the back of Jared's ne-
"Hey Kim." I stopped moving the food on my tray, even my brain stopped. I slowly turned to look at him. It was the first time that I could remember him ever saying my name, or speaking to me directly.
"Hey Jared." I think I said. I hoped that's what I said. I could practically hear Joe's eyes rolling behind me. Jared seemed to realise his mistake and looked away from me, stuffing an apple in his mouth. I giggled euphorically and turned back to Joe to hide the enormous grin on my face.
"Singles Party." I said, before tucking into my lunch, that was my contribution over and done with and I sat there while the boys discussed plans for hallowe'en between them and I fixed my eyes on Jared's face as he spoke, watching the way his tongue flicked his teeth and the little dimples in his cheeks when he grinned. The boy is a walking wet dream.
I didn't even hear the plans they made or Joe's final vote. It's okay, he's used to me zoning out in the presence of him, he'll just fill me in later anyway.
When the rest of the cafeteria refocused I listened to his voice as it filtered through my mind and every nerve in my body buzzed with the depth of his voice.
"Well then," Jared turned his body toward me, resting his hand on the bench so his thumb was pressing into my ass, his face close enough that I could feel his breath on my cheek. I stared unabashedly at his lips "give me a list of names and two hats and let's do some damn good matchmaking!" he said excitedly. And then he winked straight at me, inches from my face.
He winked…
Shit.