Chapter 18: Conversations

******Still in Asgard******

Angel and Spike escorted Buffy to her assigned quarters. She had tried to insist she would stay with her sister, but her request seemed to fall on polite but deaf ears. Xander was in the room next to her with Willow on the other side. Angel and Spike were sharing the room across from her. Neither was happy about the number of Asgardian guards everywhere. Buffy tried to tell them it wasn't anything to worry about. However, both men knew her too well.

"I don't like this," Angel said with a grim face. He and Spike stood in front of the opened door to her room. He eye-balled the guard at the end of the hall. "We are out-numbered and out-gunned."

"Speak for yourself. I can handle these men in tights," Spike said with a sneer.

"Guys, we can't display any hostility. We don't want to upset Dawn more than she already is. It's too much for me to take in. Image how difficult this is for her," Buffy said.

"She embraced that lunatic who let aliens into our world!" Spike reminded her. "Who cares how difficult it is for her? You need to talk some sense into her!"

"Like she ever listens to me," Buffy grumbled. "She didn't even tell me she was involved with Xander. Did you know that?"

Both Angel and Spike sneered. Neither was fans of Xander. "Her crush wouldn't have been allowed to develop if you didn't insist on hanging out with that cradle robber!" Spike said with a disdainful curl of his lip.

"Like you have the right to call anyone a cradle robber!" Buffy said laughingly. "Xander is wonderful. I don't mind that they're together. I mind that it went on for six months and neither thought it was something I should know!"

Angel gave her a sympathetic wince. "Yeah, I can see why you'd be miffed," he said.

Buffy sighed. "Now that seems like the least important thing. My sister has literally changed right before my eyes. This entire day is insane!" Buffy said.

"Well, you weren't offered to be freed from your vampirism like I was," Spike said with a cocky grin.

"Yes, I don't get why you didn't tell him yes? Don't you miss the sunlight? Being human?" Buffy asked.

Spike gave her a pained look. For some reason, he hadn't given her a thought or how things could've been different if he were but a man again. "I...I just thought about how weak I was as William. A girl like you would never have looked twice at me," he said glumly.

Buffy reached out and squeezed his hand. "I can be very stupid," she said, giving him an affectionate look.

Angel frowned, never liking to be reminded of Spike's relationship with Buffy. However, it didn't sting like it used to. "You don't know that whatever Thor's father was going to do would've made you weak. Maybe he would've made you like Thor. Ever consider that?" Angel said with a smirk.

Spike's mouth fell open slightly. It hadn't occurred to him. "Bloody hell!" he exclaimed, now thoroughly disgusted with himself.

Buffy laughed. "I've missed you guys," she said. "Will you sit by me at dinner?"

"We got your back, don't worry," Spike told her.

She stepped forward to hug them both. When she pulled back, she saw Clint and Steve at the end of the hall. She gave both men a wave before she went into her room.

Clint was frowning as he watched Buffy with the two vampires. "What's with her and those creatures?" he wondered aloud to Steve.

"She cares for them," Steve observed.

Clint looked at them with distaste. Buffy waved at him and Steve and went into her room. The two vampires turned to go into the room across the hall. The blonde one flashed Clint a smug look as if he knew exactly what Clint was thinking. "They're vampires! How could she? Isn't that, like, against the natural order of things? She's a vampire slayer!" he observed.

Steve shrugged. "I know next to nothing about such things. However, we've begun to know Buffy. If she cares for them, they must be worthy," he said. Then he turned and walked in the direction of his room.

Giving Buffy's room one last disgruntled look, Clint followed after him.

In Willow's room, Illyria was pacing restlessly. She didn't like that the Asgard's king had so much more power than she. It made her very unsettled. She eyed the human talking to Willow, not sure she liked the new woman. Willow was the only human that she felt real affection for. She was almost as powerful as Illyria. In the shell she existed in now, the witch was even more powerful than she was. Her power earned her Illyria's respect. However, her affection for the human witch was not because of her strength. It was because when she looked at Illyria she did not see a monster or a freak. She did not even blink at the blue aura. She did not call her Smurfette or resent her for not being Fred. However, when Natasha affectionately caressed Willow's cheek, she decided that she did not like the woman in black leather.

"Are you okay?" Natasha asked Willow, putting her hand on her cheek.

Willow nodded. "I feel pretty drained. But I'm okay. I'm glad we probably won't be throwing down anymore tonight!" she said with a grin.

Natasha laughed. "Well, I'm glad things calmed down. I don't really want to fight Thor," she said.

"I'll take away his hammer and let Illyria slap him around some," Willow said with a wink at Illyria.

Human humor still escaped the former Old One. "I will be most happy to slap him around," she said with relish.

Willow sighed. "Probably not a good idea. I don't think we should test Dawn's loyalties so soon," she said. "I mean, she's Dawn but she's not. She spent who knows how many centuries as this Atali person. Now she barely looks like herself."

"Well, I don't think she'll forget her bond with you and her sister so soon. Going to battle with someone binds them together. You spent years together on a hellmouth," Natasha reminded her. She doubted there would ever be anything that could sever the bond she had with Clint.

"Very true," Willow said brightening. She yawned. "I'm so tired. Don't let me use the wrong fork at dinner, okay?"

Natasha gave her a fond smile. "I'll keep an eye on you," she said. Then she winked. "Both of them."

Illyria frowned at the woman.

"I guess I'll go check out the room they put me in. See you in a bit," Natasha said. She leaned in and gave Willow a light kiss on the lips. Waving at Illyria, she left the room.

"Is she your lover?" Illyria asked Willow.

"Not yet," Willow said. "But things are progressing nicely." She gave Illyria a satisfied smile.

"I'm not sure I like you with her," Illyria said with a haughty sniff.

"What's wrong?" Willow asked.

Illyria sighed. "I'm infected with humanity," she grumbled, clearly unhappy with her human emotions.

Willow gave her a considering look. Was she jealous? "Illyria, do you have, like, a sex drive? I mean, do you like men?" she wondered.

"I have a mating cycle. Sex is used for procreation," she said with a shrug.

"But you're in a human shell, right? You could have sex if you wanted, right?" Willow inquired.

"Of course. But I am not a human. I do not have the same human urges except when my cycle is here," Illyria shared. "But I have Fred's memories. She liked sex a lot. Sex with Charles. Sex with Wesley. She lusted after Angel, too."

Willow snickered. "It's hard to think of Wesley having sex," she said.

"I find myself feeling a strong dislike for your friend Natasha," Illyria said. "Why do you suppose that is?"

"Are you jealous?" Willow asked with a grin.

Illyria gave her a considering look. "I never have been before. I guess I don't like to share," she admitted. She supposed Angel and Spike were her friends. However, Willow treated her much differently than they. Illyria realized that Willow's warmth and easy affection were very appealing.

Willow threw her arm around her. "Well, there's plenty of me to go around. Don't worry," she teased, winking at her. "How about we go join everyone at dinner and you try not to kill anyone unless Buffy attacks someone first?"

"You know I do not require food," Illyria informed.

"Well, good. You can spy on our new friends while I eat!" Willow said, grinning.

Next door Xander was with Dawn, trying to take in the change in her appearance. She was more beautiful than ever, and he didn't like it. He was leaning against the closed door watching her go through the dresses in the closet. This wasn't her former room. Her aunt had put her with Xander, trying to make her happy. Their rooms weren't that close to the royal family's. His frown deepened. She was royalty. Even though she was an adopted daughter, she was related to the king by blood.

Dawn/Atali glanced up at Xander and saw his frown. "Are you okay?" she asked. She put down the dress she selected onto the bed.

He shrugged and walked toward her. "I don't know. Are you?" he inquired, looking at her closely.

Her eyes clouded over, and she shrugged. "I guess. As well as can be expected. A part of me is freaked. This is a lot to take in. My head is still spinning," she said as she walked up to him and put her head on his chest, seeking comfort. It was a move she'd done a hundred times before. Both before and after they'd become lovers.

Unfortunately, for Xander, it didn't feel the same even though he hugged her close. It felt like her. However, this was not the woman he fell in love with. He'd been surrounded by powerful women for what seemed like always. Although he loved Willow and Buffy, it was not fun always being the weak link. Nor did he relish how often they felt the need to protect him. One of his favorite things about Dawn was that she was like him. She understood what he felt like. Now, however, she was a super-freak like Thor. Or he assumed. He actually didn't know.

Xander pulled back and looked down at her. "So are you like Thor now? Are you immortal?" he asked.

Dawn pulled back and looked at him. She blinked, thinking about his question. Then she nodded. "I guess so. I was born an Asgard. I remember my life. My very long life. I used to think Angel and Spike were so ancient. But they're babes compared to me," she said with a grimace. "Yet I remember all those fake years the monks put in me, too, like they really happened. It's really disconcerting."

Xander nodded. He knew it wasn't easy for her. He just wasn't sure if he would fit into her new world or even if he wanted to. But he loved her. More than he thought he ever would. He had loved Anya so much, yet in the end, he'd left her broken. Her love for him had eventually led to her death. It had never occurred to him that Dawn could end up hurting him the same way.

He realized she was waiting for him to respond. "Yeah, I can imagine," he said lamely. "So what's going to happen Dawn? To you? To us?"

"What do you mean?" she asked. "My family would never hurt us."

He grimaced, already hating the ease in which she referred to Thor and company as her family. "I meant what are you going to do? Pick back up your life here as Atali, the ambassador to the Nine Realms? Because you know, there's no way I'm staying on this planet surrounded by all these perfect people. It's bad enough having Will and Buffy as my best friends. Do I need to be reminded of how much I lack every waking second?" Just thinking about it made him angry and his voice rose. At the end, he was almost yelling.

Dawn stared him down, not looking much at all like the Dawn he knew. Xander had a sinking feeling that this was Atali. "You will not talk to me like that! You will not belittle our relationship like this or make out like I've ever given you any indication that I didn't love you," she said, fire in her eyes. She put her hand on her hip and glared at him. "I want to build a life with you, Xander. The question is, do you still want one with me? Because I'm not just Dawn Summers anymore. I can't be exactly who I was ever again. It's going to take time for you to get used to Atali. She's who I am, too. But Dawn is still here. I still love you. Even knowing all that I know as Atali, my love for you hasn't diminished."

Xander realized that even in declaring her love for him she was different. He didn't think Dawn had ever used the word "diminished" in her life. Yet it rolled so easily off of her tongue now. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Then he put his hand on her shoulder. "I can't promise you anything, Dawn. It's going to take some time, but I want to be with you. I just don't know how I can fit into your world here."

"Let's not focus on that. Let's focus on me getting used to my new memories, and you getting used to the changes they've brought in me," she said with a rueful smile.

"That I can do," he said. "A simple plan always work for me!"

She laughed. This would work out. She knew it.

A short time later, Buffy walked out of her room to get them for the dinner. She could tell by looking at Xander that he wasn't quite comfortable with the new Dawn. However, Dawn seemed happy. She smiled warmly at Buffy.

"You're going to love my family, Buffy. I promise!" she said excitedly. "And they're going to love you!"

They ran into Thor, who smiled in delight at Dawn, hugging her.

"I still cannot believe it is you," he said, marveling at her. "Fate is a funny thing. Just as I fall in love with a human, you are returned to us as one!"

"I can't wait to meet your girlfriend!" Dawn told him.

"She's so amazing! You will love her," he said as they entered the hall. Before they walked further, he stopped and turned to Buffy. "Buffy, I wanted to apologize for my actions. I know that it was wrong of me to take your sister from you without explaining. I don't mean to be rash, but sometimes I still am. Patience is not one of my virtues." He flashed her a sheepish smile. "However, I want you to know that as Atali is my sister, and she is yours, you will be by extension a member of our family. I would count you as sister." He opened up his arms to embrace her.

Buffy flashed Xander and Dawn a panicked look. Dawn just snickered as Thor embraced Buffy. She didn't so much as hug him back as let him hug her. He pulled back and grinned down at her. "You're so tiny! Yet so formidable. A worthy sister!" he said proudly, as if he was personally responsible for her skills. Buffy wasn't sure how this was going to work.

"I don't know that I ever wanted a brother, but I guess there's worse things," she said, smiling at him. He was so intense and magnetic; it was hard to stay angry at him.

"Ah, here she is!" Odin announced, standing at the head of the very long table. He beamed down at Dawn and held out his hand toward her.

Buffy looked out at the many strangers who now stared at her. She knew they were mostly looking at Dawn; however, she felt a bit overwhelmed at the sudden scrutiny.

Xander felt ill as he gazed at the many faces staring at him. He could feel them judging him and finding him wanting. How would this ever work?

******To Be Continued******

A much different chapter than the few before, but I hope you enjoyed it! I love and appreciate your reviews. Thanks for reading!