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-Kyoto University Hospital, Sakyo Ward, Kyoto Prefecture-
The black haired boy stares at the door in front of him, he is at the hospital, visiting his mother. "Room 1015, Julianne Manalo." he reads before entering the room. There, he saw a woman in her 40's, she's too thin and pale for a for his liking. Multiple of tubes and IV fluids stuck in her frail body. The boy closes the door and walks to the bedside, carefully taking the woman's right hand and checks her wrist, slowly mapping it with his index and middle fingers. He remembered there's a keloidal scar on this particular wrist. He always use it to differentiate her from other people since it's hard for him to recognize someone's face even if they were familiar. He can't recognize his own face as well.
There are a few methods to recognize the familiar people, their voice, their hairstyles, feeling how their face felt in his hands (if they allow him to touch it), expecting to see them, the way they walk and their scent. Anything that is easy to remember and that is distinguishable to the said person. He can't really relay on their voices without his hearing aids so he usually go with context of meeting the said person or looking at their picture first before actually meeting them. On regular basis when he bump into his older siblings, he tells himself that one is male and the other is female.
It doesn't usually works when he bump on someone he know all of a sudden, he's fine offending them by asking who are they but they would look at him as if they had too much salt in their mouth. Well, he apologize that he's been like this ever since he can remember. Doctors said something is wrong with his brain even though it's functioning well—He don't really understand it, he's an idiot when it comes to science, math, he can't read nihongo that much and bad at computer codes. He can read and understand English and finished his academics, not in flying colors though.
Alkie smiles at his mother, he wish she wake up. A miracle always happen, right?
The boy let himself slipped into his first language as he told his mother on how his day were, he spoke softly his tone is filled with warmth, holding his mother's thin hand delicately caressing her knuckles. He loves his mother, unconditionally. She may not be the best but she still gave birth to him.
After the bad things she'd done to him. The young male still loves his mother. That's right, he let himself believe that her mother cares for him. His mother actually never care for him, she would either hit him with a broomstick or with a fly-swatter. She let him starved for days, it makes him wonder how he survived starvation. His mother is suicidal too, if she's out of his sight he'll be scurrying around their house to find her. He's relief that everytime she attempted to kill herself, she never succeed. He wondered why she wants to die that badly.
Why can't she make me her will to live, Am I not good enough...? his child self thought, whilst tending her mother at that moment.
The boy learned that his father was the sole reason why his mother end up like that. He broke her heart. Is that why she calls her own son a mistake? It stings but nonetheless, he still loves her. Mr. Yamato would probably call him a fool. He don't understand him, probably due to time... He wonders.
The younger male leans down and places a kiss on her forehead and say. "Nanay, aalis na po ako... Bibisitahin ko po ulit kayo bukas..." ("Mother, I'll be going now... I'll visit again tomorrow...") he pause and pursed his lips in a tight line, he cannot really let himself cry. "Nanay...gumising na po kayo..." ("Mother...please wake up...") he mumbled before saying his farewell to his mother.
Alkie knew the fact that she's not going to wake up. Those apparatuses and tubes stuck in her body is the only thing that kept her alive for a decade now. She's suffering because of him yet...
Asking for a wistful miracle won't hurt.
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