He knew she had arrived. If it wasn't the tires pulling up to their - his - house on the dirt road, it was the familiar sound of her heels clicking on the steps up to the door. Normally, that sound made him smile, this time, it made him nervous. There was another set of footsteps to follow, heavier, unfamiliar.
"He wants to come, he thinks it will be good if we all have dinner together." She had told him. Instant hesitation rising, he didn't know this person, as much as he wanted to, for Scully.
While Mulder's life was slipping away during the believed alien invasion, Scully created a bond with someone else. He didn't blame her, never, but the jealousy rising in him was something he tried to control. His life was washing away in more ways than one. The incessant noise of knocking broke him from his reverie. Taking a deep breath, and plastering on a smile, he opened the door to her.
"Hey, sorry we're a little late." She smiled sheepishly at him. He nodded, with a comforting smile, moving to the side to allow them entrance. They sat around the table, him playing a good host and retrieving drinks for both of them. Scully felt like a stranger in the house, in the home they had originally built together. That thought tugged at her heart, looking at the guy sitting next to her, just as uncomfortable as Mulder. She let out a heavy sigh, all her best efforts were going into today.
"It was a nice drive today, beautiful outside." She was the only one really carrying the conversation.
"We can eat outside if you want, I bought a new table."
"That sounds perfect. You've done some other work on the house, from what I've noticed."
"I did. It keeps me busy." He flashed her a tight-lipped smile, the guy sitting next to her keeping quiet. This was already a disaster, and Mulder needed to amend it, for Scully.
"Do you like being in DC?" He asked, trying to keep the pleasantries civil.
"Yeah, it's definitely different than where I'm from. It's been nice, to be around Dana." He shrugged, turning to Scully to give her a smile. She smiled back at him, running her hand through his hair in a comforting gesture. Mulder's heart sank at the sight, that motion used to be reserved for him. The pure love and bliss on her face when she looked at him, that's something Mulder thought he could never give her.
The rest of the dinner conversation took place outside, Scully admiring Mulder's handiwork. She missed this house, this home. Since they found a cure for him to recover from his imminent death, things had shifted between them. Scully had unintentionally drifted away from him, his efforts minimized to fix that. He saw how happy she was, and couldn't take that away from her again. He never really felt it was his place to intervene.
After dinner, Scully insisted that she would clean up, leaving the two boys to talk amongst themselves. She leaned into Mulder's ear on her way in, the move catching him off guard.
"Talk to him, please." She placed a small kiss on that spot on his neck, just below his ear. She knew what that did to him, she wasn't playing a fair game. He internally groaned at the gesture, glaring at her as she made her way inside with the dishes, the smirk appearing on her lips.
"So, how long are you here for?" Mulder asked, taking a swig of his beer, not knowing where to begin.
"I'll be here all summer. I'm staying with Dana, but she said we could probably spend some time out here, too."
Mulder nodded, this was, after all, still technically her house as well. They had married, during their years on the run, and never discussed it when she left. They had this unspoken life bond, that could never be broken, even with death knocking at his door just a few short months ago. They had made it out alive of that as well, together. Always together. Though this time, they acquired a new person to their two-man band.
"You're both always more than welcome."
"Were you two ever married?" He blurted out. Mulder paused, mid drink, not sure how to answer this line of questioning. He still wore the ring, she didn't. "I'm sorry, I just - you're wearing a ring. I've asked her, about you, and her answers are always vague. Or she just says I can ask you myself, and walks away."
Mulder chuckled, that was Scully. Avoid anything that she didn't really need to talk about. Especially with Mulder just a few miles away, she would pawn it off on him to have this heart to heart conversation.
"Technically, we still are. The papers have been signed, but never filed. Legally separated is the politically correct term, I believe." He tried to suppress the emotion in his words, they were never easy to say. Every time one or the other had possession of the fully signed documents, they found an excuse to 'wait for a better time.' There was never going to be a good time for it, but neither could be the person to officially cut all ties.
"She still loves you, I can tell by the way she talks about you." He said in a hushed voice, almost as if he were afraid to say the words. They caught each other's gaze, a silent understanding passing between them.
"Well if that were true, the feeling would be mutual." And he left it at that. This wasn't exactly the conversation he was anticipating to have. Maybe talk about sports. Was he even into sports, or was he more the silent, nerdy type? Mulder wouldn't know, because he never asked.
"When I was younger, I used to have these intense feelings." He began. Mulder set his beer down with a shaky hand, this was definitely not where he thought the conversation was going. "They weren't my feelings, I think they were yours."
Mulder's breath caught in his throat, biting back the emotions that came washing over him. Since they had found him again, and he had been the sole provider for the cure to Mulder's life, he had kept his distance. Scully had an instant connection with him, she had cared for him as an infant, and slipped right back into that role. He had only spent a total of a few days with him before they came crashing into his life again. He never thought he could compete with the way those two bonded, but here he was, telling him otherwise.
"How did you know, that they weren't yours?"
"It didn't make a lot of sense to me. I've had the same sensation my whole life. I knew you must have been someone important though."
Mulder nodded, not knowing what to say. He withdrew, despite Scully's protests, from getting to know him more, because he felt it wasn't his place. He desperately wanted to fall right into this perfect family model, but something was holding him back. Not something, guilt, he felt it every day. Guilt for leaving Scully to have to make that decision in the first place, to give him up so long ago. Guilt for never being able to fulfill her happiness, knowing what she had lost because of him. This was his chance to amend that for her, by staying far away, the loner in the big house that they had built together.
"I've had the same experiences before. After -" He paused. He didn't have to say it, they both knew. "In my mind, I told myself it was you. That these foreign sensations were yours. I think it's the one thing that kept me connected to you."
"I know you feel responsible, but you shouldn't. She doesn't blame you."
"Do you know that, or do you have the same...thing, with her?"
"It's there, not as strong though. I think it's because she tries to hide her emotions." There was a smirk on his face, matching Mulder's. They both knew just how emotionally stubborn Scully could be.
Mulder just nodded, finally relaxing around his son. Their son. He wanted desperately to not disappoint the boy sitting next to him. He wanted to teach him about everything, well, maybe not everything. He wanted to be a better father than his own was, but instead, he had become detached, distant. It was never his intention, it's just how it played out. Not knowing where he stood with Scully, with William. Seeing them together, it warmed his heart, breaking it at the same time, thinking he could never have that.
"I -" He paused, breaking the silence. "I want to get to know you. I'm sorry if I haven't been around as much as Sc- Dana."
"You've been cautious, it's okay. I know you want to...I do, too."
"Can you read minds, or is it just -?"
"No, it's just...feelings. It's not with everyone, just you guys."
"So you said something about spending some time out here?"
"She offered it, but I think she was nervous about me actually saying yes. That's why I suggested dinner first, ease her into the idea."
Mulder smiled, it didn't take long for him to figure out Scully. There were few people who actually ever could.
"You could stay here as long as you'd like."
"Thanks." He said in a small voice, feeling the truth in Mulder's words. They were both getting to know each other, becoming acquainted with the roles they would be playing in each other's lives.
Scully finally composed herself, wiping away the escaped tears that landed on her cheek. She was listening through the window the entire time, listening to her boys. They were the only family she had now, the only one she's ever really wanted. Seeing Mulder today was difficult for her, considering he's been keeping himself isolated in this house. She now knew it's because he felt immense guilt, not because he didn't want to be there.
"How's everything going out here?" She stepped onto the porch gingerly, letting her hand rest on William's head. It was more a comforting gesture for her than him. He could sense her worry, and excused himself to go inside, giving them time to talk. He knew they both needed it.
"He's a good kid." Mulder said quietly. They weren't responsible for that, and yet, in some strange way, they were.
"He is. He's brilliant, questions everything. I like to think that's a genetic trait." The smirk growing on her lips, eyebrow arching at him suggestively. He chuckled, nodding in agreement.
"He - uh, he mentioned something about spending some time here."
"I may have introduced the idea to him...if that's okay. I can bring him by on weekends, or during the week for dinner."
"Or, you could both come and just stay here. I know you took some time off work while he's visiting." Her breath caught in her throat, she didn't know if she was ready to go down that road with him again. If she allowed herself to admit it, it's the only road she's ever taken that never gave her reason for a second thought.
"Is that something you want?" Her voice was a whisper, heartbeat thudding loudly in her ears.
"Yes. It is still your house, too, after all."
His words had more meaning than he intended. It highlighted the fact that they had built this home, together. Now they would be able to share that with their son. It meant that they were still connected, legally, as well as spiritually. It meant that he had never given up on them, like she had briefly allowed herself to do when she walked away.
She reached out, grasping on his left hand, running her thumb gently over the ring he still wore. The ring she had placed there that made him hers in every way.
"It's our house."