Kailor: And I'm back! Goodness, it's been busy here. And cold. But I do love the cold. I am sooooooo super sorry it's taken so long. The rumors of my demise are false I assure you. Hope you enjoy, folks!

Emma grabbed her tool belt from the car while she waited for Leroy to get his men together. She glanced at her watch. She had time to at least help get started before she ran home and changed for her date.

Date.

It had been ages since her last actual date. But she shook that thought away as Archie's little car screeched to a halt across the street. He rushed out of the vehicle, calling to Leroy.

Emma pulled out her phone and quickly texted Henry. "Hey, we're breaking up the road across from the gym. Pongo got stuck in the drainage. The Mayor is so gonna stomp Archie like a bug for how much this is gonna cost. But tell MM you two need to take the long way home."

A few moments later her phone dinged. She frowned, prepared to tell him to stop texting in class. But when she saw his message, she snorted.

"All I saw in the message preview was 'Hey, we're breaking up' and I was like BUT WE'RE SO GOOD TOGETHER! lol."

She shook her head. The kid was too much like her. She replied, "Nope, you won't get rid of me that easy. Til my death do we part."

His reply was quick. "Til MY death do we part, woman."

She frowned and sent back three consecutive texts before he could answer. "No fucking way."

"Don't even say that."

"I punch you in mouth."

Just the thought of Henry going before her made her heart clench painfully. But her sweet boy texted back a moment later, easing the tightness in her chest.

"Mom, I'm supposed to die last. That's why it's til MY death. So it'll last longer."

Emma glanced up at the men across the street, making sure they weren't looking as she swiped a hand beneath her eyes and sniffed, clearing her throat gruffly. "Yeah, I better be long gone when you die. Or I kill you."

"MM said stop distracting me. God, Mom. I'm in class."

The blonde rolled her eyes and put her phone away. Her little brat was so going to get it later.

XXXXXXX

Regina toyed with her phone, dragging her nail along the case's edge. She was seriously considering postponing her date with a certain blonde sheriff. Not only did she feel the woman deserved a breather between visiting a dead ex and dating a new person, but she needed time to process what she'd learned. She'd dated a woman before who had lost an ex. Regina spent half the relationship wondering if she was being compared to the deceased lover and the other half knowing she was. It wasn't a relationship path she wanted to follow again.

So she had tried to wait up the night before to talk to Emma when the blonde got off patrol. But she had fallen asleep around two, glasses still on, book lying open on her chest. And when she woke up, her book was on the bedside table, bookmark in place, her glasses folded neatly on top, and Emma's side of the bed was rapidly losing its warmth. The woman had beaten her up again.

Over breakfast, Cora told her their house had been cleared and by lunch time she was back in her old bedroom, holding her phone, and biting her lip.

It was strange how quiet the house seemed. It had sounded the same way her first eleven years of life, her boarding schools had been very strict about keeping the noise to a minimum, and her apartment in New York had rarely been anything but silent.

But now, after just a few days in the Swan household, she suddenly missed the constant bustle. She missed the clinking of dishes as Ruby moved around the kitchen, the stomping footsteps on the stairs as Henry raced around getting ready for school, Emma's singing while she worked on her car. She missed the loud bickering and laughter. Even when the three of them had been out of the house, she'd never found herself alone long. People were always coming and going, as if they lived there too. Granny would bring by food. Tink spent a great deal of time helping herself to the T.V. since she didn't have satellite. Belle would suddenly appear from Emma's office, arms loaded with books or papers. Occasionally a man named August would be in the garage, tinkering with Emma's Bug. Mulan spent every other afternoon in the yard, working out with the sheriff's equipment.

She'd never seen anyone as trusting as the Swans were with their friends. It seemed everone she ran into had a key to the house.

But she pushed those thoughts from her head, focusing again on her phone. She pulled up Emma's number, or tried to. The contact Emma Swan was gone. She frowned, wondering if she had accidentally deleted it at some point. Then she remembered something Emma had said the day she'd dropped Henry off at work. Her eyes narrowed and she scrolled down. Sure enough, she had a contact named Snuggle Bunny.

She glared at the contact for a moment, then moved her finger to hit Call.

"SHUT UP AND SLEEP WITH ME. C'MON, WHY WON'T YOU SLEEP WITH ME-"

Regina nearly threw the singing phone across the room. That was definitely NOT her ringtone. Someone named Tits Hemmingway was calling her. She jabbed the answer button and snapped, "Kathryn!"

"Awww, how'd you know?"

"What have you done to my phone?"

"I just changed some tones and few contacts."

"YOU made Miss Swan, 'Snuggle Bunny'?"

Kathryn's laugh echoed through the phone. "Yeah, she mentioned it to me and I couldn't resist. Wait 'til you figure out who Giddy God's Pajamas is."

"Kathryn!"

"Anywho, I got a dog so I need you-"

Regina held up a hand, as if Kathryn could see her. "I'm sorry, you got a what?"

"A dog. It's a type of animal-"

"Kathryn, I swear I'm going to delete you from my life. I know what a dog is. Why do you have one? You hate dogs."

Kathryn's indignant gasp was far too loud to be real. "I do not hate dogs. I love them. I'm going to take wonderful care of Percy!"

Regina groaned. "You named the poor thing 'Percy'?"

"He likes it."

"Only because he doesn't speak English."

"Whatever. Meet me at the grocery store in twenty, woman. We need to shop for Percy."

"I-" But Kathryn had already hung up. Regina growled at the phone, irritated beyond belief now. Her friend sure knew how to push her buttons and she hadn't quite forgiven her yet for the trip to the cemetary. She understood it was a hard subject to broach, but any hint would have been nice. She snatched her keys from the desk and slipped her heels back on. Calling Emma to postpone was completely forgotten.

XXXXXXX

Ruby paused on her way to Granny's, pulling her phone from her pocket. "Heartbreak Hotel," she answered when she saw Emma's name.

"Aunt Ruby!"

"Henry? Aren't you at school?"

"I just got out."

"Also, there's me," a new voice said.

"Emma?"

"We have you on three-way," the Swans chorused, freaking Ruby out a little.

Emma chuckled breathily. She sounded like she'd been working out. "We're due for another hint. Give it up, Lucas-Swan."

"Yeah," Henry added. "And it better be better than the last one."

Ruby laughed. Up ahead, she saw the very person they were asking about turning into Granny's. "Okay." She waited a few moments. The Swans must have been holding their breath, because they were completely silent. "They're shorter than me."

Both Swans immediately groaned. "Aunt Ruby! You're one of the tallest people around!"

"Yeah," Emma huffed, sounding just as petulant as her son. "That cuts out like...me, Jefferson, August, and Hook."

"Well, there you go. Closer already! Bye, Swans!" And she hung up, hurrying to the diner.

XXXXXXX

Regina and Kathryn stopped at the diner, still arguing about the dog food they'd bought. "Henry told me that the first ingredient should be a meat. He said-"

"Yeah, yeah. But those foods cost more than what I pay for MY food. I refuse to go bankrupt so a pug can eat better than I do."

Kathryn swept away to sit at the counter, leaving Regina at the door where she was hanging up her coat. Regina rolled her eyes, but followed. She returned the wave Belle sent her from the back booth over her book. Kathryn settled beside Tink.

Tink stabbed a fry with her fork, eyeing the other blonde. "Shouldn't you be at work?"

"I'm sorry," Kathryn said, pressing a dainty hand to her chest. "Aren't you my employee?"

"Yes, and I'm your only employee. And I'm here. So who's running the business?"

Kathryn shrugged. "Nobody, I guess. I think the town will survive."

Ruby pushed through the swinging door to the kitchen, grinning when she saw them. "Hey. The usual?"

Kathryn and Regina nodded and Ruby scribbled the order down and reached back into the kitchen to drop it off. She returned, leaning a hip against the counter, to chat.

"I thought that red-headed boy was working tonight." Kathryn snagged a fry from Tink, barely avoiding being stabbed.

Ruby shrugged. "No, I took his shift. SOMEBODY wanted the house empty tonight because they have a date or something." The brunette winked at Regina, her grin widening.

Regina fought her blush, ignoring all three of the women now looking at her.

"Speaking of which," Kathryn said. "Do you know where you're going?"

"No," Regina said. "She texted me a little while ago and told me to meet my mother outside the diner at six."

"Strange beginning to a date."

Ruby snorted. "Sounds like Emma." She raised an eyebrow at Tink and the little blonde nodded in agreement.

XXXXXXX

At six sharp, Regina was standing outside the diner. She had debated on what to wear for an hour before finally taking Ruby's advice and wearing a pair of jeans and a casual blue button down. Folded over her arm was an old black leather coat she hadn't worn in years. Ruby's exact words had been, "Probably safe to go with something you don't mind getting destroyed. Dresses are for second dates."

Her mother's car pulled up to the curb and Regina got in, pulling down the visor to check her hair and make-up.

"You look wonderful, dear." Cora smoothed down a single hair caught on Regina's collar.

Regina chuckled. "Thank you, Mother. What's it been since you dropped me off on a date? Twenty-something years?"

"Before you went to boarding school," Cora grinned as she drove. "You were just as beautiful then."

The younger brunette scoffed. "I'm pretty sure I thought pigtails were a thing back then."

Cora just laughed, turning left at the intersection. They fell into a companionable silence as they rode. The houses became fewer, the trees thicker. After a few minutes, Regina realized they were driving up hill, their little road now winding through dense forest. Then the trees parted, giving way to rolling hills with long grass and the occasional group of cows. Cora steered them off the road and down a bumpy little driveway, stopping before a squat little farmhouse with an even smaller barn out back. Her mother parked before the barn, turning an expectant smile on her.

Regina raised an eyebrow at the rickety building. She half expected it to keel over at any moment. "Have you brought me out here to murder me, Mother?"

"Not today, darling. Emma's waiting for you. Go on."

"Here?" Regina said, frowning again at the barn. "I seriously question this woman's taste in 'dates'!"

"You won't for long. Get out. Get. Out." Cora punctuated each word with a jab of her manicured nail until Regina finally opened her side of the car and climbed out. "Enjoy yourselves, darling! Don't come home too early! Or at all! That a girl!"

"Mother!" Regina admonished her, slamming the door on Cora's enthusiastic suggestions for the night. She watched the car turn around in the grass then head back off toward town. She pulled on her coat, turning to the barn.

No one was inside. Both sets of doors at either end were thrown open and Regina could see more grassy fields beyond the barn. The stalls were all empty except for the one at the far end on the left. A single mare pawed the ground as she neared, its large brown and white head reaching over the stall door to huff at the brunette. It was already tacked up, like someone had been riding it. Regina let the horse sniff at her for a moment before lifting her hand to the mare's nose. The horse butted lightly against her palm, then blew sharply through its nose, warming her hand. As the animal stepped closer, touching her palm again, Regina smiled.

"I see you've met Rocinante."

Regina barely stopped herself from jumping, not wanting to startle the horse. She turned, blinking as another horse trotted into the barn. The rust-colored mare stopped before her, tossing its head. There was an impatient bounce in its step, a wild feel to the toss of its mane. It reminded Regina very strongly of the woman settled on its back.

Emma Swan wore her normal jeans and boots, a dark green t-shirt, and a blue leather jacket. But the look was somehow different on horseback than on solid ground-more rustic. Her blonde hair was wind-tossed and unruly, falling freely around her shoulders. But that crooked grin was just the same. "Hi."

"No," Regina said, shaking her head. "You can't ride horses too. It's just not fair."

Emma laughed. "Why not? Your father gave me lessons."

Regina just continued to shake her head. "You're not real. I'm pretty sure you don't exist."

The blonde snorted, swinging out of the saddle and landing heavily in the dust. "Funny. I feel the same way about you." Before Regina could reply, Emma unlocked Rocinante's stall and opened it. "You coming?"

"Where?"

"On our date, of course."

Regina mouthed wordlessly as Emma brought Rocinante to her. Like her father and the riding instructor had done so many times when she was small, Emma offered a hand to boost her up. Regina lifted her chin at the gesture, choosing to use the stirrup. It had been many years since she had ridden, but she swung into the saddle with ease, settling perfectly. She watched as the blonde's long legs carried her back to her own horse and onto its back, barely touching the stirrup. Neither of them spoke until they had led their horses from the barn and Emma brought her horse up beside Regina's.

"Like riding a bike?"

Regina laughed. "It's like riding a horse, dear. But yes, I seem to remember everything fairly well."

"Good," Emma grinned. "I thought maybe we'd skip the burning buildings for this date."

"Excellent choice. Perhaps next time." She turned to find Emma's eyebrows cocked up, her lips pursed to hide her smile. "What?"

"You said next time. We've barely started this date."

Regina rolled her eyes at the cocky look on the blonde's face. "I admit, this one has, so far, been adequate."

Emma clutched her heart, grimacing playfully. "You wound me."

They laughed, falling quiet for a few minutes. Emma's horse pranced sideways a few times before returning to walk with Rocinante. Regina could tell the rust coated mare was eager to be let loose. "Your horse is very impatient."

The sheriff chuckled. "My kinda horse. Her name's Peri." She patted the horse's thick neck, smiling. "I thought Rocinante would be a good fit for you. She's well-trained, calm, and powerful."

Regina chuckled. "You say that like you know me so well."

"Your parents have told me quite a bit," Emma shrugged. "Recently you've been all they talked about."

The brunette stroked Rocinante's mane. "I find myself at a disadvantage, Miss Swan. I don't know your entire life story."

Emma spread her arms, holding on only with her flexed thighs. Regina did her best not to stare at them. The jeans really left nothing to the imagination. "I'm on a date with you. Ask me anything." Emma led them over the hill and down toward a small pond before Regina spoke.

"Why were you laughing during the movie the other night?"

Snorting, Emma folded her hands over the saddle horn. "Good starter question. Well." The blonde grinned. "I was terrified of horror movies when I was younger. In one of my foster homes there was a baby sitter that made me watch Candyman and it just messed me up."

"Candyman?"

Emma's eyebrows rose. "You've never seen Candyman? Oh, we have to watch that next movie night."

"I thought you were scared of it," Regina said, swaying with Rocinante as the horse rounded the pond beside Peri.

"Was," Emma corrected. "Well anyways, I was scared of horror movies after that. When I moved in with Granny and Ruby, I was worried because scary movies during storms was their tradition. I barely made it through the first night without losing it and Granny later found me sobbing in my room." The blonde's ears turned slightly red. Then she shifted in her saddle, facing Regina. "Did you ever see Tales From the Crypt?"

Regina thought for a moment, frowning. "The T.V. show? I believe my father used to watch it. There was the creepy skeleton narrator, yes?"

"Right!" Emma grinned. "The Crypt Keeper. Well, he used to do this weird cackle. And Granny made me sit down and watch it every week and whenever he cackled, she'd bust out laughing like it was the funniest thing. I laughed more at her than the show. But every time it got scary, she would laugh at it and I would laugh at her and eventually I was over my fear. As Henry grew up, we did the same for him. Now we all love horror movies."

Peri halted at the crest of a hill, right at the edge of the forest. Regina pulled Rocinante to a stop, a smile spreading across her face when she saw the picnic blanket laid out at the base of the trees and the large wicker backet in its center. Emma slid from Peri's back, tied his lead to a low branch, and hurried to help Regina dismount. This time, the brunette allowed the blonde to help, grasping her shoulders as Emma's hands found her waist. She was very aware of their bodies brushing as Emma lowered her to the ground. She glanced up at green eyes, but if the close proximity affected the blonde, she didn't show it beyond a light reddening of her ears. She grabbed Rocinante's reins and hurried to tie her up, leaving Regina beside the blanket.

"Miss Swan, I admit it." Regina crossed her arms, grinning. "I did not expect you to be so classic. Dinner and a picnic?"

"Dinner?" Emma said, frowning. She glanced at the basket. "Oh. No. Dinner will be at Granny's after this. This is for our game."

One thin eyebrow lifted. "Game?"

The sheriff shrugged out of her jacket, then lifted her t-shirt over her head. Regina's eyes widened and her mouth opened, ready to protest, but Emma stopped when she was in her plain wife-beater. Then she bent and opened the basket. What she pulled out made Regina's eyes widen even more.

"Water balloons? How old are you, Miss Swan?"

Emma chuckled. "Sure, let's go with that. And I'm young enough to remember how to have fun. How old are you?"

Regina moved away, debating if she could make it to Rocinante before the sheriff could peg her with a balloon. "Too old for such childish games."

"Oh, come on. We play this game all the time. It's a trivia kind of thing. If you get the answer right, you get to hit me. If you get it wrong, I get you. Then we switch asking and answering." Emma hefted the balloon in her hand. She side-stepped, putting herself between Regina and the horses, as if she knew the brunette's plan.

"And what makes you think I would be any good at trivia?"

"I don't." Emma's crooked grin distracted her momentarily from the possible danger of being soaked. "An educated girl like yourself? Please. And with that in mind, I changed the game a bit. The questions will be about each other. We can learn a bit."

She frowned at the balloon again, putting a little more space between herself and Emma. "And the balloons?"

"These are just to make things interesting. Between questions, we try to hit each other. Whoever gets the first hit, gets the next question. The blanket and horses are safe zones." Emma smiled. "Or we can head back to town now and forget this date ever happened."

Regina narrowed her eyes at the sheriff.

The blonde hooked one thumb in her back pocket, cocking out a hip. "Come on, Regina. You've already referenced our second date. Don't chicken out on me now."

That got her attention. Regina rolled her eyes and started unbuttoning her shirt. She smirked as she noticed the sheriff's eyes following her hands. "Give me a balloon."

Those green eyes flickered back up to her own and Emma grinned wide. "Yes, Your Majesty."

Regina folded her shirt neatly, placing it on the blanket. Emma handed over the balloon in her hand and grabbed another, dancing away quickly. Regina moved away from the blanket, sighing internally. Normally her dates consisted of dinner at a fancy restaurant or wine tastings. This was so far out of the norm that she was certain she was actually dreaming.

"Alright," Emma said, bouncing on the balls of her feet like a bouncer preparing for a match. "It starts when I say go!"

Regina gasped as a rubbery projectile smacked into her stomach, coating her white undershirt not in water, as she had expected, but in bright green paint. She stared down as it settled into her undershirt, her mouth still open and her hands held out to her sides in shock.

"Jeez," Emma said, her crooked smile in place. "I never thought I'd have to say, 'Your mother is better at this' on the first date."

"Miss Swan!" Regina finally choked out. "I thought these were water balloons!"

The blonde blinked at her innocently. "I don't remember saying that."

"You-!"

"So I get the first question!" Emma hurried back to the blanket, snatching another balloon as she passed the basket. "What..."

Regina was still glaring down at the paint on her shirt. She glanced up at the other woman.

"Is your favorite color?"

The paint stuck to her fingers as she pulled the shirt away from her skin, grimacing at the cold breeze hitting her abdomen. "Purple." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Emma step off the blanket, straightening her tanktop. "You will regret this, dear."

Emma snorted. "Come on. You're like a kitten."

"I believe you said cats are evil."

"You look like you don't have an evil bone in your body."

Regina waited until Emma had taken a few more steps away from the blanket, then struck. She caught the sheriff in the shoulder and red splattered across the blonde's chest, face, and hair. Emma gave a yelp, jerking away, but it was too late. She swiped at her face, smearing the paint from her temple down to her chin. "Good shot, Mills," she said, chuckling. She looked up to find Regina had moved in, passing the blanket to stand before her. The woman was gorgeous, even with a light flush to her cheeks and green paint staining her shirt. But Emma wasn't prepared for the dark look that flashed across her eyes. When Regina smiled, the sheriff's gaze was pulled down to the light scar on her lip.

"Evil doesn't always look evil," Regina said, well aware of where the blonde's eyes had moved. "Sometimes it's staring right at us and we don't even realize it."

Emma never saw the balloon coming.