Beta by Wendwriter, without whom this story would make much less sense. So thank you Wendy :D
Thanks for the reviews guys - they're much appreciated!
Haldir and the twins headed for the stables after leaving the study. Faelwen, pleading the need for some peace and quiet, went to the library for sanctuary. She desperately needed a little time on her own to think, feeling somewhat emotionally drained after the experiences of that afternoon. She would have to talk to Feredir soon, and she was not sure what she was going to say to him.
She took one of her favourite books from the shelf; it was a large illustrated account of the story of Gondolin. Glorfindel had often read to them from it when she and the twins were elflings. She still loved to look at the beautiful pictures of the ancient elves and their glorious city.
She sat down at one the polished tables and opened the book, flicking through it in search of her favourite picture. It was a portrait of Ecthelion of the Fountain, one of the great captains of Gondolin, who had fallen to his death while battling Gothmog, Lord of the Balrogs. The portrait of the handsome elf had mesmerised her as an elfling and it continued to do so now.
"You still do not tire of that book, I see, young one," came an amused voice from behind her. Faelwen looked up to see Erestor at her shoulder.
"Do you mind if I join you?" he asked her.
"Of course not, Erestor," Faelwen replied, moving over and closing her book. She was very fond of the patient Noldor elf who had taught her to read and write. "I will never tire of this book. Everything in it is so beautiful! Especially that picture. Glorfindel has told me so many stories about him. I wish I could have met him! He was so brave!"
"Speaking of bravery, you made all of us very proud of you today, Faelwen," Erestor replied, sitting down beside her. "I do not think that any of us could have been so unselfish."
"I must confess, Erestor, my actions were not entirely selfless,"Faelwen admitted quietly. "I just wanted more than anything to be able to shut the door on the past once and for all. I did not want to worry any more. I want to think about the future; I want to marry Haldir and watch Estel come of age without having a shadow hanging over me."
"I think your Ada might think you are a bit young for marriage just yet, penneth!" Erestor warned her with a merry laugh. "There is plenty of time for such things when you are older. Speaking of Haldir, where is he? It is not often one sees the two of you apart when he is visiting."
"He is out on the training fields with Elladan and Elrohir," said Faelwen with a wry smile. "They are trying out some absurd new way of mounting a horse at full gallop; an invention of Legolas's, apparently. They wanted to practise while Glorfindel is training with the reserve patrol and is not there to catch them at it. I could not bear to watch! I swear, one of these days they will drive poor Glorfindel to distraction!"
"I take it you will have a few bruises to tend to soon!" said Erestor, shaking his head in amusement.
Faelwen nodded. "I would imagine so," she said. "But as long as they do not start breaking limbs, then I do not mind."The two elves shared a laugh.
"Have you spoken to your twin yet?" asked Erestor kindly, changing the subject.
Faelwen shook her head with a sigh. "Not yet, Erestor," she said. "He is still asleep and I am loath to wake him while he is healing. I just hope he believes the story of how I got here!"
They were interrupted suddenly by the arrival of Estel. The youth always tried to move soundlessly when in the huge library, but he always failed, no matter how much of an effort he made.
"Fae, are you very busy?" he asked quietly, a crease of worry showing on his brow.
"Not at all, Estel. Erestor and I were merely conversing. What is the matter?" asked Faelwen, moving the book from the table and inviting Estel to take a seat on the other side. To her surprise, he did not sit down, but instead hovered where he was, looking a little unsure of himself.
"Can I talk to you, Fae?" he asked, his brow still creased. "Outside? For I am too noisy for the library."
"Of course," Faelwen exchanged a quick, puzzled look with Erestor, before she took her leave of the chief advisor and followed her brother out into the gardens. Estel led the way, his long lean legs carrying him swiftly along as he strode along the path, and Faelwen quickened her pace in order to keep up. They walked in silence for a short while, Faelwen patiently waiting for Estel to get whatever was bothering him off his chest in his own time. Suddenly, the young man stopped and turned to face her with turmoil evident on his features.
"Fae, please do not go with them!" he burst out abruptly, his grey eyes pleading.
"Wait a moment, Estel," said Faelwen, confused. "Please do not go with who?"
"Them!" said Estel, still not making any sense. "You have forgiven them! Are you going to go with them back to Mirkwood?"
"Am I... oh, you silly boy!" said Faelwen affectionately. "Estel, after all this time, have you so little faith in my love for you?"
"It's not that, it's just... well they are your brothers," said Estel, starting to look a little sheepish. "Your blood brothers. I thought that perhaps..." he trailed off.
"Estel, I am very happy to see Feredir again and I will certainly want to keep in touch with him now," she explained, exasperated. "But I have no intention of leaving. Imladris is where I belong now. They might be my brothers by birth, but you, Elladan and Elrohir are my brothers in every way that matters!"
The affectionate embrace she drew him into was almost immediately interrupted by the arrival of Haldir, who had sprinted to there from the training fields.
"Faelwen, we need your help!" he exclaimed breathlessly. "Elladan took a fall... and I think he has dislocated his shoulder. Glorfindel will go absolutely berserk if he finds out what we were doing! Can you heal him before Glorfindel arrives?" Faelwen rolled her eyes in an extremely unladylike fashion and flashed a wry smile at the wide-eyed Estel.
"You see, Estel? I cannot possibly leave Imladris!" she told the young man as they hurried after Haldir. "Who would keep Glorfindel from killing the twins?"
Faelwen managed to get Elladan's shoulder back into place before Glorfindel arrived from his time with the guards, though she was certain that he knew they had been up to something! He certainly kept giving them suspicious glances throughout the evening meal glances which the twins returned with expressions of wide-eyed innocence.
With one more task to be faced before this trying day was over, Faelwen joined the sons of Calanon in the healing rooms to explain everything to her twin. As they had agreed earlier, Feredir was told the modified version of Faelwen's past. The twins had always told their foster sister that she was an abysmal liar, so she fervently prayed to all the Valar that he would believe what she was telling him.
Feredir listened tensely as he was told how his twin had come to be in the household of one of the wisest elves on Middle Earth. His eyes filled with tears as she told him how she had been found washed up on a river bank by Thranduil, unconscious and fevered from the spider bite; how he had brought to Imladris to be healed by Elrond; how she had no memory of who she was and where she had come from and finally, how the Lord and Lady of Imladris had opened their arms to her and welcomed her into their family. What distressed him most, though, was the changing of her name.
"But your name is Alassë!" he protested, greatly upset.
"Not anymore," Faelwen told him gently. "I have been called Faelwen for many years now. I will never be Alassë again."
"How can you say that?" Feredir began to lose his battle against his tears. "It is who you are. You are our sister! We mourned your loss for so long!"
"Feredir, calm down," said Raunien gently. "I know this is hard for you to hear, but it is harder for her to tell us about it."
"You can talk!" exclaimed Feredir angrily. "All you ever used to do was bully her!"
"Ai, let us not descend into an argument, please!" begged Faelwen uncomfortably, squeezing Feredir's hand to soothe him.
"I still cannot believe you are here beside me!" Feredir clutched her hand in return. "How did you discover that you had healing powers?"
"Ada was healing my wounds from the... spider bite,"ﾝ Faelwen said, remembering just in time to tell him the "right" story. "He noticed that any wound on me seemed to heal at twice the natural rate for an elf, so as soon as I was old enough, he started teaching me how to use whatever energy is inside me to help other people. I am glad I am able to do something useful with myself! And I have been taught by the greatest healer on Middle Earth."
"We are all thankful for that!" said Alyan fervently, looking at the bandages which still covered his youngest brother's torso.
"We are going to have to send word to Ada that we are delayed!" said Aradan suddenly. "He is expecting us back soon and he will worry."
"He will be so happy to see you again!" said Feredir, before a sudden worried look crossed his face. "You are coming back to Greenwood with us, are you not?" Faelwen felt her heart sink at these words. She had hoped he was not going to ask that tonight.
"Nay, brother," she told him slowly, "I am not."
"But it is where you belong!" cried Feredir tearfully.
"It is where I came from, brother,"Faelwen corrected him gently. "This is where I belong now. Feredir, I cannot even remember Mirkwood! I have lived here for over five centuries and I love my foster family dearly. Elrond is my father. He has taught me so much, and raised me with such kindness; I could not bear to leave him. And my heart would absolutely break if I was sundered from the twins or Estel!"
"What about your true family?" asked Feredir, sounding hurt.
Faelwen's eyes filled with tears as well. This was so much harder than she had expected it to be! "Please, Feredir, this is hard enough as it is!" she pleaded quietly. "I am delighted to see you again and I certainly do not want to lose touch with you but you cannot ask me to give up everything I love for a place I can barely remember!"
"Are you happy here?" asked Feredir, abruptly changing the direction of the conversation.
"Yes, very," said Faelwen honestly. "I enjoy working as a healer, and I am glad to make myself useful. I love Ada dearly. He is the kindest elf on Arda. I absolutely adore the twins and Estel they keep me smiling all the time. And I am hoping to become engaged to Haldir soon."
"That's all I want," said Feredir, tears running down his cheeks. "I just want to know that you are happy. If you cannot come back with us, at least I know you will be safe and well." On a sudden impulse, he pulled Faelwen into a fierce embrace and the two of them sobbed quietly in unison. It had truly been an emotional day for Elrond's foster daughter. Their five older brothers watched sadly as the two simply held each other.
"Promise me you will not disappear again! Promise me!" Feredir wept.
"I promise!" Faelwen said tremulously. "I will not lose contact with you. Not now. Not ever. You are still my twin, Feredir; that hasn't changed. I still love you. I want you to be a part of my life."
"I will be," Feredir promised. "I do not want to lose you again!"
"We will work things out," Faelwen whispered, stroking her twin's hair. "There is always a way. Always." It had been a monumental day for Faelwen, and she felt as though she had cried herself out. By the time Feredir had succumbed to sleep again and they left the healing rooms, she was exhausted.
She took her leave of her blood brothers and wearily made her way along to the
Hall of Fire, finding her foster family all gathered there.
"How did it go, young one?" Glorfindel asked, concerned, as she entered the room.
"It was harder than expected," confessed Faelwen wearily, sitting down on the floor and resting her head on Haldir's knee. "Feredir was a bit upset about my name, and very upset when I said I would not be coming with them back to Mirkwood. We talked a lot, though; there were a great many things to say."
"I would imagine there were," said Erestor sympathetically.
"I think everything will be all right, eventually," Faelwen murmured with a yawn, smiling softly at the feeling of Haldir's hands gently running through her hair. "They said that I might come to Mirkwood, just to visit. We can talk about that in the morning though." Almost immediately, she succumbed to slumber.
"Do you think everything truly will be all right, my lord?" asked Haldir worriedly.
Elrond smiled reassuringly. "I think they will be, young one," he answered. "I think they will be."
To be continued...