NO REST for the WICKED

CHAPTER XVI: PIECES

"Thought you were beside me, but I reached and you were gone."

HYMN of the MISSING, RED.

XXX

She's never really liked the rain much at all.

She always associated it with pain. Everytime it rained her life changed in some drastic fashion. It rained the day her mother left her on the doorstep of a stranger without a single word. There was no goodbye, no declaration of love or a promise to return for her. Saeko hadn't even the decency to look her daughter in the eye when she broke Natsuki's fragile little heart.

It rained the day Riku was diagnosed with severe glaucoma, and was forced to give up her dream of being a boxer forever. It rained the day the doctors discovered lumps in Julia Zhang's breasts. It always rained on the eve of her grandfather's death.

And the first storm of winter brought with it yet another heartbreak. The only difference now was that she didn't have her father to bear the storm with her anymore. There would be no more sneaking into the Windbloom forest after hours to fish in the lake. No more friendly banter between father and daughter. No more private jokes or working on their bikes side-by-side until it got so late their eyes felt like they'd melted out of their sockets.

No more wiping grease stains on each other's faces and shirts when neither one of them were expecting it. No more anything.

"Fuck!" Natsuki's agonized scream cut over the roar of the bike and the brewing storm above. She weaved her way through traffic going fast enough to compete with a plane ready to take-off. Her heart beat uselessly in her chest. The only thing it seemed capable of doing was keeping her alive and breathing.

Barely breathing. It felt like there was a thick, impenetrable lump lodged in her throat. If it weren't for the adrenaline she was certain she wouldn't even be breathing. She just couldn't wrap her mind around it.

Her father was dead.

"There has to be some mistake…" Natsuki mumbled, briefly squeezing her eyes shut only to snap them open a few seconds later after almost running off the edge of the road. "She was alive this morning… Shizuru saw her this morning… and now she's… gone?"

It was unfathomable.

Gone. Just like that! It took her nine months to get into this world, but it only took a single day, a single fucking second to take her out of it? It was cruel, and so fucking unfair.

If she'd known those texts would be the last conversation she had with her dad, she'd have said so much more. So much more…

She could see the smoke from the explosion at the factory in the distance. Black as night, the ashes mixed into the clouds until the sky looked like the remanence of a nuclear war. Was it wrong for her to wish it was anyone other than her father who perished only one hundred-ninety minutes ago?

Perhaps it-

Bang!

"Ah!" Natsuki screamed as the hood of an oncoming car, courtesy of another reckless driver, came in contact with the side of her motorcycle, nearly crushing her left leg as it slammed into the bike's flank, sending pieces of metal and parts spiralling into the air.

The teenager was thrown off of her vehicle, roughly bouncing and skidding across the pavement like a ragdoll. In an effort to protect her helmetless head, she'd thrown her arms around it, leaving her body virtually unprotected as she crashed into the slick asphalt.

She watched the smoke rise from the new graveyard through blurry, agonized eyes. She could vaguely hear voices screaming for help in the background. Tons of unfamiliar faces so close to her own, asking her if she was alright.

"I'm so sorry!"

A heavy thud near her left ear. That voice, it must belong to the other driver. "I didn't see you!" It was a man's voice. He sounded young. She was looking right at him, but somehow she couldn't see him.

"Call an ambulance." Another man hollered as a Natsuki's eyes began to droop.

"Already done. They're on the way." A woman answered this time. Her voice was gentle as she pulled Natsuki's head into her lap, her brows furrowing in concern when she spotted the subtle flecks of crimson nestled among the midnight locks. "You'll be okay, sweetheart, just stay with me now, okay?" She urged softly.

Her dark eyes sparkled with reassurance. She was an older woman with salt and pepper brown hair, wrinkles everywhere, and a kind smile. She had a distinctive warmth about her that soothed Natsuki's troubled mind.

A mother, Natsuki mused as her eyes finally fell shut. Her kids were probably all grown and searching for their rightful places in the world. They no longer needed their mother to guide and nurture them anymore.

After Saeko's disappearance, Natsuki convinced herself that she didn't need her anymore. She'd been willing to take that thought to the grave, but now she wasn't so sure. There was a time where she used to sit up in bed at night, praying to a god she didn't believe in for her parents to somehow reunite and fall in love again so they could be one big happy family.

But that wish would never be granted now because her father was dead and her mother was still nowhere to be found.

She'd never felt so alone.

XXX

Namiko shook uncontrollably in Riku's arms as her frail little body was mercilessly assaulted by gut-wrenching sobs. She couldn't believe it either. She'd literally just saw her daughter the other day, laughing and joking and smiling like she always did.

She thought her life ended when Ren died, but it was Reagan who gave her the strength and the will to survive when all seemed lost. Her daughter, her only daughter, was her only anchor to the living world.

And now that anchor was gone.

She hadn't cried so much since the day that battleworn marine came to her door all those years ago with his head bowed and his eyes sad as he handed Namiko her beloved's dog tags and wedding ring, both black around the edges from where the metal and diamond were exposed to the hellish inferno of the explosion that had claimed Ren's life.

Weeks went by and Namiko's health and mental state rapidly declined until she was forced to submit to a hospital and Reagan was taken away from her by a worried social worker who feared Namiko would let her grief and sorrow prevent her from taking care of her only child.

She remembered placing her hand on the glass separating her from her daughter when she came to visit her mother at the mental institute, how she promised over and over again to get better so they could be together again.

"Mother," Reagan had said that same day, her brilliant viridian orbs sad yet determined as she gazed at the broken shell of the once strong, exuberant woman before her, "It's okay. I'll take care of you from now on." She'd puffed out her little chest like proud little warrior she was.

"It's what daddy would've wanted," Her daughter continued, "Daddy isn't here to protect us anymore, but I'll do it from now on, I promise."

She'd kept her promise too. Namiko was released a few weeks later. Reagan took care of her while she slowly grew re-accustomed to life on the outside again. She brushed her long, dark hair after she showered, which was a tumultuous task by itself because her hair was so long and so thick.

She'd took on almost all of the household chores which included cooking, cleaning, tending to the garden in the backyard, shopping, and many other things an eleven year-old shouldn't have been doing. Eleven… she'd missed her daughter's eleventh birthday while she was still admitted at the institute.

When Reagan was at school one day, she'd dragged herself out of the house for the first time in months and went down to the market, ignoring the pitying, awed looks its customers gave her as they watched the princess who'd fallen from grace stalk through the marketplace with her chin up and her gaze unwavering.

She hadn't trusted herself to cook so she purchased a single cupcake from a local vendor, then she made the isolated journey back home where she lit a single candle and waited for her daughter to return.

She remembered the tired little girl practically tumbling through the door that evening she was so exhausted. Her darkened eyes had regarded her mother and the cupcake curiously. Namiko had beckoned her over and kissed the child on top of her dark head, whispering a long overdue 'happy birthday' and countless 'I love you's' to the stunned youth.

She'd only managed to eat half the cupcake before she fell asleep in her mother's arms. It was then, when the maiden gazed down at her only child, so utterly precious in slumber, that she truly dedicated herself to getting better.

"Tell me it isn't so," The middle-aged woman moaned out painfully, latching onto Riku's firm biceps in a desperate attempt to steady herself, "I have lost everything."

Riku sniffled as her own tears forced their way out of her sightless eyes. She'd never heard her grandmother sound so broken. Cruelly fortunate, she was, to not be able to witness the look of utter devastation on the woman's face.

Namiko lost a daughter today, Natsuki a father, and Riku, her best and only friend. The younger woman bit her lip as thoughts of her cousin's lone offspring filled her troubled mind. "Obaa-san," Riku choked out, "You mustn't say that."

"I only speak the truth," Namiko mourned, "My daughter was the sole reason I lived to see this day, this dark, dark day, and now she is gone. How am I supposed to survive this, this, nightmare!?"

"You must think of Natsuki." Riku said. "She's all alone."

Green eyes flashed with realization, and Namiko berated herself for such an act of selfishness. How could she say such things when there was a young girl out there just as broken as she was, or possibly worse?

"Riku, we must find Natsuki." Namiko said, and Riku nodded furiously, although she wasn't sure how much held she would be.

Namiko's eyes felt like two heavy weights and her knees were faring no better, but she forced herself on two feet. Her concern for her granddaughter rivaled all else, even the agony of losing her child. She'd have time to break later once she found Natsuki.

The door swung open before either of them could even blink and Nao, Nina, and Shizuru burst in, soaking wet from the rain. Namiko hoped she'd see her granddaughter trailing behind them. She didn't.

"Dad!" Nina cried, throwing herself in Riku's arms and burying her face into her shoulder, assuming a position none to different from Namiko's earlier one. Riku whispered sweet nothings into her ear and stroked her hair while Namiko hurriedly approached the other two.

"Juliet, where is Natsuki?" Namiko inquired fearfully.

Nao couldn't find the strength to complain about Namiko's usage of her much hated first name. She ran a hand through her mess of red hair. "She didn't come here!?"

Namiko shook her head. Judging by Nao's word choice, she could conclude that Natsuki had indeed ran off. It was something she did often as a child when she was stuck in her feelings, a habit that unfortunately was never broken.

"We must find her," Namiko urged, "She's hurt and alone. In her current state she could be a danger to herself and others. Where on earth could she have gone?"

"We swung by the house on the way here," Nao said, "She wasn't there. We were hoping she came here, but obviously she had other ideas."

"Would she go to her mother?" Shizuru suggested desperately, her crimson eyes shimmering with terrified tears.

"No, no one knows where Saeko is." Namiko replied softly. "She left Natsuki with her father…" The woman sucked in a pained breath tried not burst in tears. "...Years ago. Natsuki hasn't seen nor spoken with or of her mother in almost a decade."

Shizuru cupped a hand over her mouth as a particularly loud roar of thunder sliced through the air, causing all of them to jump slightly.

"Natsuki…" Shizuru whispered, "Where are you?"

"Wait." All eyes turned to Riku as the blind woman's words demanded it. "Natsuki ran off as soon as she heard, right?"

"Yeah, we tried to catch her but she was too quick." Nao spat, furious at herself for not being able to do more. "Stupid mutt, not only did the weather decide to take a shit on us, but she's out there on that bike with no freakin' helmet!"

Namiko didn't think her life could get any worse than it already had, but now she was hearing that her granddaughter was out in that storm, on that deathtrap, with no helmet? Oh no. She couldn't lose Natsuki. She couldn't lose her granddaughter and her daughter in one day.

"She must be going to the scene of the accident…" Riku said, her sightless eyes fixed on the ground.

"Makes sense," Nao replied, "Of course she'd want to see it with her own eyes… but damn, those roads are bad enough in general, but with weather like this, their fucking deathtraps."

"Quickly, we must find her before…"

Namiko trailed off as the house phone began to ring. Green eyes, red eyes, amber eyes, and pale blue ones locked onto it instantly. Namiko's anxiety increased tenfold and she swallowed down the bile rising in her throat.

Please, she pleaded as she made her way over to the erratic device, Heavenly Deity Amaterasu, watch over my granddaughter. I beg of you. Let this not be a call informing me of another loss.

"Hello?" Namiko answered curtly.

All of the others listened intently.

"This is Namiko Kruger… yes, I am her grandmother… Oh goddess, is she alright? Of course… I'll be there immediately… thank you…" Namiko hung up the phone, not caring that it wasn't completely on the hook.

"Obaa-san…" Riku murmured.

Namiko's face was grim. "That was the hospital. Natsuki's at Fuuka General. She was badly injured in an accident."

No! Natsuki… Shizuru screamed internally.

"We must leave at once." Namiko pressed.

"We'll take my car." Nao said, referring to the old black Honda Civic her mother had given her when it was apparent that she'd have no use for it any longer. Nina ran upstairs and grabbed her dad's leather jacket and an umbrella while Namiko and Shizuru locked up the house.

Duran whined loudly and latched onto the back of his mistress's kimono, momentarily preventing her from leaving with the others. She looked down at him. His icy blue eyes were sad. She kneeled down beside him.

He was a gift in both the senses of being given to her and being a beloved companion. Reagan had bought him for Natsuki as a gift for her eleventh birthday, and though Natsuki loved him dearly, she thought it best to give him to her grandmother because Namiko had lived in isolation before she took Riku in.

"I'm sorry," Namiko said softly, stroking his delicate ears, "But I'm afraid you can't go with me this time."

Duran whined again and licked her nose, his eyes practically saying, "Please, I'll be good, I promise."

Namiko kissed him on top of his fluffy dark head and turned to the door, ignoring the scratching of his nails on the wood floors as he desperately tried to go after her. He raised himself up on the door as it was before he could get out, howling and barking and crying like an abandoned puppy.

XXX

"Man, what a day." An exasperated voice ground out tiredly as its owner leaned hazardously on the edge of a lab table where one of his colleagues was working diligently on one of her latest experiments. "Who knew rats were so fast?"

She looked up and laughed. He was referring to the little incident that happened earlier. One of the newer biotechnicians had mistakenly released all of their furry little test subjects by pressing a button he had no business even looking at.

"It could've been worse." She said.

He nodded and winced slightly. "Yeah, a few escaped rats are nothing compared to what happened down at Marguerite Industries."

The woman froze. "What happened at Marguerite Industries?"

"You mean you haven't heard?" He inquired, surprised. "It's practically international news by now!"

"I've been in the lab all day." She whispered.

"I believe you," He said, "But there was this massive explosion!" He made wild gestures with his hands, rather inappropriately if you asked her. "The flash could be seen from Hiroshima!"

"Daiuske!" She snapped before he could go off course with his exaggerations. He was famous for those.

He smiled apologetically. "Sorry, but yeah, the explosion was pretty big. They say it was caused by a fuel leakage from one of the stealth jets or something. Casualties are relatively low despite the sheer size of that thing."

Saeko Searrs gripped the edge of the table as a wave of anxiety washed over her.

No, she squeezed her eyes shut. She's fine. She's okay. Stop assuming the worst.

Unaware of his colleagues internal struggle, Daiuske said, "Sucks for the company and the families who lost their loved ones today. I mean it really sucks. Reagan Kruger was by far the best Aerospace Engineer of our time. Now that she's gone, Japan's fucked if another war breaks out, especially if it comes down to dog fights." He blew out an exasperated breath, which quickly turned into a squeal of alarm when Saeko suddenly collapsed, her wobbly knees no longer able to support her.

"Woah, Saeko!" Daiuske cried, kneeling beside her and resting his hand on her shoulder. Her entire visage turned an unhealthy shade of white, her breaths coming out in short bursts of ragged, agonized pants. "YO!" Daiuske roared to no one in particular. "I need help in here!"

She felt as though her world was crashing down around her. The father of her first child, her former best friend, girlfriend, and her first love, was dead. And she hadn't even had the chance to tell her how sorry she was for what she'd done.

To top it all off, she had a daughter somewhere out there, alone and shaken by the sudden loss of her father. And she didn't even know where she was or if Natsuki even remembered her. She probably thought she was an orphan now.

She might as well be, Saeko thought mournfully as the effects of her panic attack caused her to slip over the edge of unconsciousness.

XXX

"Hello, how can I help you?"

The receptionist at the hospital desk was young and earnest. The black glasses he wore slipped down his nose every now and then, and his huge brown eyes radiated his eagerness to please. Namiko would've found it cute if the situation were different.

"I'm looking for my granddaughter," Namiko said hurriedly, her eyes wet and shiny. "She was admitted earlier because of an accident."

"What's her name?" He leaned forward, his fingers hovering over the keyboard anxiously.

"Kruger Natsuki."

He was typing even before the last syllable of Natsuki's name was uttered. He swept back a curtain of floppy, untamed brown hair as he leaned forward until his nose was almost pressed up against the screen. "Ah, found her! Kruger Natsuki was admitted forty nine minutes ago due to an accident that occurred on the Imperial Highway, suffering from mild head trauma, a fractured clavicle, and bruised ribs."

Shizuru bit her lip as Namiko's shoulders slumped even further. She felt nauseous, but she was certain it had nothing to do with her pregnancy. Nina saw the pained uneasy look on her face and grabbed her hand with the one that wasn't settled in her dad's jacket pocket.

Riku's eyes, as always, were trained on the floor; although her chin was raised slightly, indicating that she was listening intently to the receptionist's words.

"Can I see her?" Namiko inquired, her tone desperate.

He nodded. "Yes, since you're immediate family, but I can only allow two at a time. Hospital rules, I'm sorry." He added apologetically.

Nao and Nina exchanged glances. "Shizuru, you should go with Obaa-san." Nina said, and Nao and Riku nodded in agreement.

"Yeah," Nao said, "All of that immediate family is bullshit. Your her girlfriend, which makes you family by default."

Shizuru dipped her head gratefully. "Thank you, thank you so much."

"No big deal." Nao shrugged. "Just make sure she's okay, okay?"

"I promise." Shizuru whispered.

Namiko flashed a tiny smile in the trio's direction before grabbing Shizuru's hand. "Room 232!" The receptionist cried.

The tips of Namiko's damp hair tracked water all through the sterile white halls. Her calves were also damp from where her long hair ended and stuck to the fine fabric of her midnight black Kimono.

When they entered the room, they saw that Natsuki was not alone. She was sitting on the bed with her head bowed, her dark hair a curtain shielding her beautiful, possibly tear-stained face from view. She was wearing one of those flimsy, revealing hospital gowns, exposing her torso that was wrapped tightly in thick white gauze. Her left shoulder was heavily bandaged as well.

Her arm was in a splint cradled tightly to her chest. There was also a small bandage on her cheek and temple. She had a nasty case of road rash that covered almost the entire expanse of her right arm. They'd been sterilized and left for the air to heal.

A blonde woman was kneeled in front of her, clad in Tokyo Police Department uniform and trying to gently coax Natsuki into a conversation. "Why were you in such a hurry, sweetheart?" She was saying. "You know how dangerous those cliffs are, especially in weather like this."

Natsuki didn't reply, only stared silently and vacantly at the floor, appearing almost as blind as Riku.

"Natsuki." Namiko stepped forward, completely ignoring the stranger for she held no significance to her whatsoever. For the first time since she arrived, Natsuki's glittering eyes left the floor and rose to meet a familiar pair.

"Dad?" Natsuki breathed, hopefully. The first thing she saw was dark hair and green eyes, mistaking her grandmother for the father she'd just lost.

Namiko's resolve cracked yet again. "No, sweetheart. It's Namiko."

Natsuki blew out a shaky breath, for once hating the striking resemblance her father and grandmother shared. The female officer stepped politely left the room, but Namiko was certain she wouldn't be very far.

The older woman cupped her granddaughter's clammy cheek and pressed their foreheads together. "Oh Natsuki," She whispered. "I'm so sorry."

With a strangled sob, the teenager buried her face into her grandmother's shoulder. Her fingers fisted in Namiko's kimono tightly, almost as if she feared that she too would disappear out of her life.

Shizuru stroked Natsuki's hair, unable to form words or even to comfort her in the way she so desperately wanted. She'd never seen Natsuki cry before. The sheer amount of pain nestled in each and every broken sob shook her to the very core, and before she could even attempt to steel herself her own tears broke through.

It just wasn't fair how someone as loving and caring as Natsuki could suddenly be exposed to such heartbreak. She wasn't too young in age, but she was too young to be without her dad… and her mom.

If Shizuru could trade her father's life for Reagan's she'd do it in a heartbeat. But it didn't work like that. Life wasn't that fair. She felt helpless because all she could do was rub Natsuki's back while she cried herself ill and tell her that everything was going to be okay.

She didn't trust herself to do the last part because she'd said that before… and now look what happened. But she did make a promise to Reagan… practically on her deathbed to always take care of Natsuki.

And that's what she'll do for the eternity she planned to spend at Natsuki's side.

XXX

Chapter Preview:

To Namikaze Shinobu, loss is nothing but an opportunity to gain. She hopes to use Natsuki's devastation as leverage in her attempts to recruit her…

Natsuki tries to find the strength to continue after the death of her father. Luckily, she's got her loving girlfriend by her side. Shizuru reveals her pregnancy to the Kruger Matriarch, and a broken woman searches for summer in the midst of winter.