I apologise - I have been utterly abysmal at updating this story. Thanks for all the reviews that have come in while it's been in the doldrums - I'm always thrilled to see that people are still enjoying what I've written.
Listening to Billy Boyd's 'Last Goodbye' and watching all the special features on the Desolation of Smaug kickstarted my inspiration to get another chapter up and take another step towards the end of this tale. I'm not ready to say goodbye to Middle Earth yet - I don't think I'm emotionally prepared to see this final film!
I hope the following is at least partly worth the wait!
May, Two years later...
Slowly, under the leadership of its new king and queen, Gondor began to recover and to prosper. Buildings were remade, new crops were sewn and provisions were made for the numerous widows and fatherless children the War of the Ring had left in its wake. Across Middle Earth, the stories were the same; Rohan and Mirkwood and the hobbits' beloved Shire were gradually returned to their former glories, made all the stronger by the ties of friendship and loyalty which now bound the Free Peoples of Arda together. As one, the kingdoms of all races looked to the future with hope.
There were still the occasional dark moments here and there, of course – not all of the foul creatures of the enemy had been vanquished and from time to time a pack of orc raiders would appear on the outskirts of the Gondor, or a rogue spider would again try to make a nest in the Woodland Realm. These disturbances were always swiftly dealt with though and gradually they became fewer and fewer.
Faelwen, Haldir, Elladan and Elrohir had remained behind in Minas Tirith when the rest of their kin had returned to their homes in Imladris and Lothlorien. They were anxious to be of use to Arwen and Aragorn in any way possible as they took up their new roles as King and Queen, and also desired – mindful of the mortality that now both their siblings were subject to – to spend as much time in their company as was possible. Legolas, who had travelled extensively with his great friend Gimli after Aragorn's coronation, was now founding an Elvish colony in Ithillien and it was expected that the four elves would remove to colony by the year's end and take up permanent residence there.
As Faelwen walked out towards the white tree early one summer afternoon, she couldn't help but look forward to that removal eagerly. Ithilien was close enough that they would still be near Aragorn and Arwen and see much of them, but would it would be a more open and natural dwelling place. Despite residing here now close to two years, she still found the vast stone expanse of Minas Tirith to be a little oppressive, especially with so few trees close by. The white tree on the top level of the Citadel had rapidly become her favourite place in the city; the only place where she did not feel closed in.
As she strolled along the pathway, past the guards and towards the tree, she was surprised to note that the tall, dark haired figures of Elladan and Elrohir were already strolling there in silence. This was a place she rarely saw them; they had not her wood-elf's love of trees and preferred the hustle and bustle of the court to the quiet peacefulness Faelwen found here.
"You two look uncommonly serious," Faelwen remarked lightly, falling into step between them and threading an arm through each of theirs.
"With good reason, sister," said Elrohir gravely, patting her arm affectionately. "We spoke with Ada this morning and have been given much to think about."
"What is the matter?" Faelwen pressed, a little bewildered at their solemn countenances. They had as delighted as she to see their father again when Elrond arrived to visit the city a few days before.
"Come, let's find somewhere to sit and we will tell you," said Elladan. "Though mayhap you should find your husband, Faelwen. This will concern him too."
Truly unnerved now, Faelwen duly hurried off towards the library, knowing she would find Haldir there. When they had first arrived in Minas Tirith, he had devoted his time to assisting with repairing the damage done to the city buildings but the renovations almost complete and requiring much less of his time, Haldir had developed a keen interest in the lore of men, and had taken to spending much time in the library, poring through scroll after scroll. He greeted his wife with a smile and a kiss and, upon discovering her errand, followed her back to the White Tree filled with curiosity.
Elladan and Elrohir had taken up residence on a bench nearby, both still looking more thoughtful than Faelwen had seen them in years. "All right," she said firmly, as she and Haldir sat down nearby them. "Here we are – what has Ada said that has got you two looking grimmer than Eomer of Rohan?"
"Ada let something slip this morning accidentally," Elrohir began quietly, Faelwen's joke failing to raise a smile. "I do not think he intended on telling us until you were there too Faelwen, but when he talked of parting we pressed him for answers. He told us that with peace so firmly established now and the time of Men beginning, Ada's thoughts are turning ever more to our mother, and to Valinor."
"Valinor? You mean...?" Haldir blinked in astonishment.
"Yes," Elladan nodded briefly. "He told us that he intends to sail before the end of the year."
"The end of the year?" Faelwen repeated in horror. "But Elladan, it is May already – that is so soon! It is no time at all!"
"I know. My reaction was as yours," Elladan replied. "But the more I think on the matter...Ada been parted from Nana for so long. And he confessed that he could not endure staying to see Arwen wither and die as a mortal. You forget, he already had to witness his own brother make that same choice, not to mention all the other losses he has suffered throughout the ages. I cannot begrudge him his choice; he has known too much of loss."
"He will not be going alone," Elrohir continued, looking distressed. "I believe most of the household of Imladris mean to go too – Lindir and Glorfindel and Erestor have certainly all agreed already. And Haldir, he mentioned that Daerada and Daernaneth had talked of making the journey West as well."
Haldir gave an exclamation of stunned surprise and the small group of elves fell into a pensive silence as the full meaning of this discussion sank in.
"So, I suppose the crux of the matter really is..." Elrohir said eventually. "Whether or not we go with them?"
Faelwen looked askance at her husband and her brothers and saw that they all looked just as stricken as she felt. It was a dreadfully unpleasant choice either way...to be parted from their parents for years on end, or to be parted from those loved ones destined to live on Arda until their time ran out.
Suddenly, Faelwen was beset with the memory of the tiny baby she had been so unwilling to hold at first but who had, inch by inch, completely stolen her heart. She had promised to always be there for him. And although he was a man grown now – a warrior and a king in his own right who did not require a doting sister to look after him – she could not sail away and leave him behind. Not now. Not after everything that had happened. Not while he still drew breath.
"I...I would like to stay, I think, for now," she said quietly, looking at Haldir as she spoke and hoping desperately that he would be of a like mind. "Estel and Arwen's years will dwindle and end all too soon and then we shall be parted forever. I could not bear to stand on Valinor and think that I had turned away from the chance to share that time with them."
"I agree," Haldir nodded, squeezing her hand. "I do not think I am ready to leave yet. We have all fought so hard...sacrificed so much...for peace on Arda – I say let us stay and see the results of that peace before we move on. We have many friends here who cannot join us on the white shores; I would prefer to spend what time they have left here with them."
"What say you, my brothers?" Faelwen asked.
"I am inclined to agree," Elladan said, while Elrohir looked torn. "I do not think I could cope with leaving them behind so soon. Elrohir?"
"I cannot lie," Elrohir said sadly. "My heart longs to see our mother again. We have been apart from her for far too long and if we chose to stay then we must part with Ada too for who knows how long. And yet...the thought of leaving Estel and Arwen, never to see them again, is more than I can stand. Both choices mean heartache!"
"We may delay sailing," Elladan reasoned. "And though we part with Ada, we will be with him again in time. However, if we leave now there is no chance to ever see Estel and Arwen again. The parting will be permanent and that I am not ready for. I will stay with Faelwen and Haldir."
"Then I will stay with you," Elrohir concluded. "I could not leave without you. I think we need to tell this to Ada. He will likely be in his chambers, come."
Solemnly, like elflings in trouble, the quartet trooped back indoors and made their way to the guest quarters that had been kept for Elrond's use. Elladan knocked at the door, and when the answer came to enter, they filed one by one into the room to stand in a line together.
"This is quite the deputation," Elrond said, raising his eyebrows in surprise, before gesturing to them to sit down near to where he sat at the window, a large leather tome open on the table before him. "What is amiss?"
"Ada, we explained to Faelwen and Haldir what you told us this morning," Elrohir explained, as they sat down beside his father.
"I had hoped to tell your sister myself!" Elrond reproved mildly, frowning at the younger twin.
"I was the one who pressed for details, Ada, when I saw how grave they looked earlier," Faelwen defended her brothers. "They told me that you mean to sail for Valinor before the year's end."
"That is so, iel-nin," Elrond nodded. "The time of the Eldar is ending here. There will be many from Imladris making that journey."
Seeing the question about to form on Elrond's lips, Elladan - ever the spokesman when the children of Elrond were all together – said quietly. "Ada, we have discussed much together this afternoon and we have decided not to come with you."
Elrond's face went so violently pale that for a moment Faelwen genuinely feared he might faint. He closed his eyes with an expression of immense. Suddenly, she realised he had completely misunderstood – he took their refusal to sail as a permanent one!
"No, no, Ada!" she cried anxiously, leaping to her feet and hurrying forward to take his face gently between both of her hands. "You misunderstand us! We do not mean to stay behind forever!"
"Elberth, no!" Elladan exclaimed, catching on and hurriedly rushing over to reassure his stricken father. "Ada, we merely mean to stay on Arda some years longer. It is our wish to dwell here until Estel and Arwen reach the end of their days and then make the journey to Valinor once their time has passed."
"We could not leave them now," Faelwen continued imploringly, taking her father's shaking hand in her own. "We've had so few years with Estel. I knew when you took him in that he was mortal...that I would have to part with him one day. But I can't leave him while he still has years to live. I would regret it forever."
Wordlessly, Elrond simply gathered Faelwen and Elladan in his arms and held them against his chest, not trusting his voice in his abject relief. For that briefest of moments, the thought of losing his children, all five of them, had almost overwhelmed him. Estel and Arwen he knew he must part with, but the possibility of losing Elladan, Elrohir and Faelwen also was more than he thought he could survive.
"I give you my blessing to stay," he said thickly. "If you swear that you will come to me when the time comes for your brother and sister to give up this life."
"We swear," the four younger elves replied in unison, and Elrond knew he would have to be content with that.
The date of the departure was eventually fixed upon as September and Faelwen was not alone in regarding the month with trepidation. It was confirmed soon after their discussion with Elrond that the Lord and Lady of Lorien would also be leaving these shores, causing Haldir much sorrow and turmoil. How swiftly the dreaded month seemed to arrive, bringing with it many sorrowful partings.
Orophin and Rumil, deciding that they had seen enough death and sorrow in the last few years, and not wishing to remain and witness more, had decided to sail with their parents. And so, assembled on the borders of Ithilien on a cold day in early September, Haldir, Faelwen and the twins made their farewells to Haldir's brothers, as well as to Elrond, Celeborn, Galadriel, Glorfindel, Erestor and many other beloved old friends.
Tears were shed on all sides as last embraces and endearments were exchanged. Though the departing elves, who had already taken their leave of Aragorn and Arwen, knew that this parting was not intended to be a permanent one, no one could be certain that the four they left behind would never encounter danger or hardship or sorrow.
"You swear to me that the three of you will follow!" Glorfindel demanded in a fierce whisper, gripping Elladan's chin so that the younger elf met his eyes. "Your father will not survive the loss otherwise! Promise me, Elladan!"
"I promise!" Elladan replied, just as intensely. "I will see to it that Elrohir and Faelwen make the last journey with me. You have my word."
"Good," Glorfindel said, smiling with a hint of his usual humour and bestowing a paternal kiss on Elladan's forehead. "While I am sure I shall enjoy the peace of being free of you and your brother, I will look forward to seeing you again soon."
"It has been a privilege to watch you all grown into sensible, kind young elves," Erestor told Elrohir fondly. "See to it that you use that sense to stay out of danger and rejoin us as soon as you can."
"We shall look after one another Erestor," Elrohir replied a little shakily as the older elf embraced him. "You may depend on that. We shall all be together again ere too long has passed."
"Goodbye, Ada," Faelwen said sadly, throwing her arms about Elrond's neck; Elvish dignity be damned. "Please do not fear, we will follow in time...I swear we will. I will miss you." She squeezed her eyes shut against the threat of tears and she breathed in the smell of Elrond's robes as her father embraced her. She wanted to commit every detail of him to memory. Her throat tightened further as the realisation slammed into her with jarring force: this wonderful elf who had been there with unfaltering love and wisdom every single day since first she had been brought to Imladris by Thranduil, was not going to be there anymore; not for a long time.
"I will be waiting for you and your brothers from the minute I arrive on the white shore," Elrond spoke against the crown of his daughter's head. Faelwen's eyes spilled over as she felt the deep, overwhelming sadness in him. "I will miss you too, iel-nin. More than you can imagine."
"No children!" Orophin declared with a watery laugh, jabbing Haldir in the chest. "You are not allowed to have children until Rumil and I are there to spoil them!"
Haldir smiled sadly and embraced his brother. "Take care of yourself, brother. And look after Rumil," he said, his voice strained. This parting was hardest for Haldir; while his wife would at least have her brothers remaining with her, the Marchwarden was parting from his entire family. He had looked after his brothers ever since they had been orphaned in their youth, it would be hard to let them go now.
"I am not an elfling, Haldir," Rumil said lightly, but tears showed in his eyes. "And should not you be the one 'taking care'? As I recall, Orophin and I have yet to be sliced almost in half, unlike you!"
"Just be safe and be happy!" Haldir said, pulling Rumil into a hug.
"We will miss you brother, more than you know," Orophin said despondently, joining in the embrace. "Do not stay away too long. We will be there to greet you when your day comes to sail."
The departing party mounted their horses and one final set of sad goodbyes were said. All felt the pain of this parting keenly and Haldir, Faelwen and the twins were made to repeat their vow to join them in Valinor so many times that they lost count.
At last though, the inevitable could not longer be delayed and the four young elves stood watching tearfully as their loved ones rode away, never to return.
"We are doing the right thing," Elrohir said shakily, gripping Elladan's elbow rather harder than necessary. "I know we are." The others nodded in agreement. They knew it was true, but – watching parents, grandparents, siblings and friends fade into the distance – it was difficult to be comforted.
It was a long time before their tears ceased to fall.