A/N: Y'all good? [pats myself on the back] Whew! That was funny! I had y'all in stitches! Y'all probably was like, "no she didn't". I must say when I thought of that yesterday morning I was laughing my ass off. Those kids?! Mini freaks in the making! They made me do it! Stevie's has woken up! Late post! Hopefully y'all enjoy this read. (: It's PACKED!

Sam's POV

My mother is really outside trying to get her a stick from my tree this is just too much. Meanwhile Kurt and Blaine have took Ian upstairs to have a talk to, Santana and Brittany are doing the same with Gabby and so is Rachel with Logan, and where is my son, TJ slipped somewhere the only thing that got me out of my thoughts was the ringing of the phone.

"I got it babe. Hello Evans Residence, the lady of the house speaking. WAIT! WHAT?! HE'S! OKAY! OKAY!"

"What's going on?"

"Stevie is awake …."

"Well, he picked a damn good time to come out of his coma. Everyone is after his ass and he doesn't even know."

"Sammy."

"I'm glad it's just that. We have 4 little kids here who know about it, organism, and playing dirty not to even mention my mother is out back trying to get a stick with the help of Stacey and Artie and my dad are watching."

"I know but we need to talk to that son of ours. I got a feeling that he's the cause for most of this. Speaking of which, where is he?"

"I don't know."

"THADDEUS JOSHUA EVANS! DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

TJ's POV

I thought since my cousins were getting yelled at by their parents I'd come up here to mommy and daddy room and see if everything is okay and in place.

"THADDEUS JOSHUA EVANS! DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!" Geez every time I set foot in here someone calls me. Yesterday it was Uncle Puck now its mommy."

"Yes." I left their room closing the door behind me and went to the top of the steps and mommy was looking up from the bottom with her hand on her hip and that look on her face well. You'll see y'all know the look from ODNT yeah, that look when she stood in front of Sam and Artie.

"Come here."

"I gotta get…"

"No, you not getting anything bring your behind down here now." I slowly took my time coming down the stairs. "If I were you I'd put some pep in my step." I finally made it down the stairs and my cousins were nowhere to be found.

"In the dining room."

"Mom…" I said sitting down and she just cocked her head to the side.

"Did I say you could speak? What happened at the playground yesterday?"

"We played."

"No, you didn't play. Playing doesn't involve learning about poo poos and organisms. Who told you those things?"

I sat there quiet I wasn't going to tell on my friends I didn't want them to get in trouble.

"No one."

"TJ, stop lying to me. Someone told you because before then you didn't know what an organism or poo poo was until you starting going to that playground. Tell mommy his or her name."

"But…"

"This isn't up for discussion. I want their name or names so I can call their parents and tell them what they've been teaching my 5 year old son. What are their names?"

"TJ, mommy asked you a question. Tell her. Now."

"But…"

"No buts TJ. You got your cousins in trouble and you are in even bigger trouble. Aunt Santana already told me that Gabby, you, Logan, and Ian sneaked into our room last night."

"They snuck in our room? Why did y'all sneak in our room?"

"Here…" I heard Aunt Quinn say as she gave the paper to daddy he took the paper and opened it up and handed it off to mommy without taking her eyes off me.

"What is this?"

"One of the kids that TJ was talking to yesterday invited him over for a sleepover that's his mother phone number. It was in his pants pocket I checked them before I was about to start on the laundry." I wish that phone number would have gotten washed. I wouldn't be in trouble now.

"Thank you."

"Is this one of the kid's numbers?" He asked me I just nodded my head.

"I'm going to call them now Sam, hand me the house phone."

"Mommy no don't call Simon's mommy."

"You don't tell me what to do I tell you what to do." Dad placed the phone in her hand and he read off the numbers as she dialed.

"Hello."

"Hello this is Mrs. Evans, TJ's mother your son and my son met on the playground. Yeah…um he's having a sleepover. Well, I don't think my son will able to attend. Its come to my attention that your son has been teaching my son about sex."

"What?! Simon down here now! What has he told your son and how old is he?"

"He told my son about an organism that, that's what people do when they scream at the end of it and how it is people jumping up and down on each other, not to mention whatever else he taught my niece and nephews. My son is 5 years old."

"Well my son is 8. Simon you taught someone about an organism? What do you know about an organism?"

"It's what you do when you be screaming dad's name."

"Mrs. Evans no worries I'm going to deal with my son and that sleepover he was going to have he won't be having. Sorry about all of this. Thank you for calling me."

"It's fine. You have a good day."

"You too."

She hung up the phone and placed it on the table and balled up the paper with TJ's number on it. "That's handled. I don't want you playing with TJ no more. That boy is 3 years older than you. Baby I thought this park had 2 sides."

"It does. It's a bridge that connects the big kid side to the little kid side. What side you play on TJ?"

"The big kid side the little kid side is boring all they talk about is little kid stuff the big kids talk about big kids' stuff."

"TJ, I don't care little kid side or big kid side if you ever get the chance to go to that park again to play you'll be on the little kids side because daddy and I will be the only ones taking you there. Uncle Stevie will not be taking you to any park any more until he sits down with your father and me to discuss how to watch you on the park. Now, I'm all for in you having fun and making friends but the fun stops when 5 year olds and 6 year olds are learning about sex. You are too young to know about sex. Daddy and I will discuss that with you at some time later in the week because you have been given the wrong information and I better not hear organism, it, or we play dirty come out your mouth because if I do it's not going to be pretty Thaddeus. You are excused but this talk isn't over we'll finish this later."

"Yes, ma'am."

I got up, put the chair back under the table and went upstairs where Ian, Gabby, and Logan were just sitting quiet. Fun's over. Now what can I get myself into? Hmmm…..

JJ's POV

Visiting my parents' house to tell them that we're visiting California, to see Mercedes and see my nephew. I let myself inside because I got a key and mom is in the kitchen wearing her TJ apron. Told y'all they went overboard with this.

"Mom, we're going to California. Pack a bag?"

"No, hi mom. How are you? You just come in and tell me we're going to California."

"Yeah we decided."

"Who are we?" She asked me as I caught Chew out the corner of my eye walking by with a t-shirt on that had TJ on it.

"Mom, the dog too!"

"Yes, got him a shirt made yesterday he's an uncle."

""Uncle? We as in Uncle Julius, J3, and myself."

"So, y'all decided without us that we're going to California."

"Yes. She already reached out to you and dad so why not? I mean she sent you pictures." I picked up my mother's phone and flipped it over and there was TJ's face. "And you and dad seem to have gone overboard with putting everything that can have a face on it with TJ's face."

"I know have you seen the toilet paper."

"Yeah…um…do y'all wipe y'all behinds with it?"

"No, we just use it to wipe up dust. Why?"

"Oh…well I needed some toilet paper so I took a roll of TJs home with me. I mean I don't wipe my ass with it or nothing just…anyway. Are you and dad down for this trip?"

"Yeah. I should call her."

"No, let's just surprise her at Sam's house. I'm sure she'll be happy."

"I agree. So when are we leaving?"

"Tonight."

"Tonight?! Tonight is bible study and I have to show the pastor TJ picture and see if he can christen TJ if Mercedes ever comes back here to Lima for a visit."

"Mom, I'm sure that 'Cedes had TJ christen. Just pack some clothes enough for a few weeks."

"Okay."

"One more thing, mom."

"Yes, baby."

"When we arrive at the airport please you and daddy don't be showing TJ's picture to everyone you see and meet last time you did that you held up the 10 items or less line.

"I wanted to show off my grandson."

"Mom and you only had 1 item I'll be back in 3 hours."

"Okay."

Sam's POV

Artie and my dad are outside watching my mother and sister, get a stick off my tree to beat Stevie with if she only knew the stick Santana was talking about wasn't an actual stick. I heard the refrigerator door open and knew it was Puck. He's the only that hasn't ate.

"What's up Puck?"

"Nothing much. Sammy what did I miss? All of the kids are in TJ's room quiet. Unusual for them, especially when they were, talking about it and how people jump up and down and scream last night. I thought they were talking about leap frog but the more I thought of it I thought of sex."

"You would be right. Seems some kid on that playground was telling TJ about sex and yesterday he told Gabby, Ian and Logan. Not to mention last night they watched 'Cedes and I have sex."

Puck started coughing. "S-She finally did it? With you?! Long time coming! How was it? How was it?" He kept nudging me. "Was it everything you'd thought it would be?"

"Yeah it was everything I thought and more."

"But I thought that she wasn't going to have sex until she was married." He took another sip of his drink. "Y'all married?"

"No, Mercedes and I aren't married we're just in a committed relationship and she and I decided that we'd include sex."

"So, what's up with the ring on your left hand because it looks like a wedding band, did y'all elope because when y'all left here a couple of days ago you weren't sporting that?" He leaned over to look at it.

"Puck no, we're not married no eloping or nothing this is just a commitment ring I'm to her and she's to me that's it."

"Okay. Just making sure because when y'all do tie the knot, back that up when you do get married, back that up, when you get engaged I want to be there. That's one engagement I got to see so enough about your relationship. Any update on Stevie?"

"There is. I'm just waiting for my mother to come in from getting her stick."

"Why is she outside getting a stick?"

"Well my brother didn't really watch TJ on that park. TJ was learning about sex some kid taught him every little thing, orgasm was organism, heard he called a dildo a dlong or a dingdong some other stuff things too so yeah. 'Cedes and I will be talking to TJ later. To answer your stick question, she's getting one to beat Stevie with for the playground."

"Can I get in on this? I mean he did run out of here and didn't answer our calls."

"Well there's a line you got to take a number."

"Damn. Who is first?"

"Mercedes, then Santana, Kurt and Blaine, Rachel, Brittany, my mom, my dad, my sister, Mercedes again because she's going to whip him for me, myself and then it's you."

"Not Artie or Quinn?"

"Oh, I'm going to get him to film it so he'll know the next time not to do that shit again and Quinn can take pictures for the memory book make sure we all get copies."

"Finally got the stick!" My mother announced pulling off the leaves into the trashcan. "Where is everyone else?" She looked around.

"The ladies are in the game room. TJ and the kids are in his room."

"Y'all got TJ back in line?"

"Mercedes handled that mom, Stacey get dad Puck some privacy, please."

"Sure also can you tell 'Cedes to come in here."

"Cedes!" He yelled walking into the game room and she came out.

"Babe we're going to tell them now?

Yeah just waiting for Stacey to get dad."

"I got dad." She announced closing the door behind Artie as he rolled into the game room.

"What do you have to tell us? We need to get change and head over to the hospital to see Stevie." Dad said taking a seat and eyeing mom's stick.

"That's what we need to talk about?"

"While all of that confusion was going on we got a call from the hospital about Stevie."

"Is it good news or bad news?"

I took Mercedes hand in mine. "It's good news. He's out of his coma." Mom gasps. "Yeah, so we're going to be heading over there in a little bit."

"Yes! I can't wait to see Stevie and love on him and once that's done I'm going to beat him with my stick about that damn park then I'm going to beat him again with my stick to find out why he was over there."

"That's great but honey. Leave the stick down here."

"He is really awake?"

"Yes Stacey. Stevie is up!"

"Great!" Stacey got up and was heading back outside.

"Where are you going?" Mercedes asked her.

"To get me a damn stick too I'm not going to be the only one stick less!"

"I'm not even going to ask. Shall we tell our family?"

"Yeah, New Directions Family! Got some news! Good news!" I yelled and they all came from their respective places.

"What is it?"

"It's about my brother…..he's woke!"

Everyone has happy and hugging and hi-fiving each other. Then Santana ran towards the stairs. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to get my stick!"

"She bought it with her?!" Puck asked.

"Well of course!" Brittany answered.

"Okay, everyone get dressed we'll be heading out to visit my brother! Make sure your beat down weapon of choice is small!"

We all took showers and got dressed and after Stacey got TJ dressed we told her to send him to our room.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Sure."

"Is this about me sneaking in here? I just wanted to see how sex looked because it said sex on my birth certificate and I thought I had it." Here he goes again. "No, sex on your birth certificate just means if you're a boy or a girl."

"Oh. Whew! 'Cause I was trying to figure out if I bounced up and down on someone when I was a baby."

"TJ, Babe, you're about done TJ is in here and we need to tell him this news." The door opened and she came out sat beside me and whispered in my ear. "I have something to tell you later".

"Okay. TJ, mommy and I want to talk to you about Uncle Stevie?"

"Uh-huh."

"Uncle Stevie is up!"

"Yay!"

"But you can't see him."

"Why not? He's my Uncle Stevie."

"I know munch but he's in the ICU and they don't allow kids back there for safety reasons."

"That sucks."

"It does but we're going to Facetime him from his room to the waiting room where you'll be that's as close as you're going to get to him for a while."

"Okay… can we go now?"

"Sure."

Tank's POV

My mother had went home and I was left here with Vito, Vito is a friend of the family no he wasn't hired. Just a friend to help us out when we need something taken care of.

"Who is Sam Evans?" Vito asked swiping through the pictures we took of Stevie Evans mail. "I'll look him up. Oh…wow."

"What?"

"Sam Evans OC for the Chargers, man got money."

"Whatever?"

"Who is Mercedes Jones dating?"

"It better say me?!"

"It has you and two other dudes a Sean Lewis and a Sam Evans. Didn't you tell me that when she was on tour with Bey she invited someone from high school to see her open?"

"Yeah, I was there he came to her dressing room."

FLASHBACK….

I heard a knock on the door and I didn't feel like getting up from my comfortable position so I just yelled for them to come in.

"Come in!" The door opened and I wasn't expecting to see this person.

"Uh...Mercedes' here? I was expecting to see her."

"Who are you?"

"Oh, I'm Sam." He said extending his hand and I just looked at it and smacked it down.

"Look, I don't want to shake your hand. What are you doing back here?"

"I was asked to be here. You're Tank?"

"Damn right. That still don't answer my question. Why are you back here?"

"Mercedes said that there would be backstage pass waiting for me when I arrived here so here I am. I'm just here to support my friend."

"Yeah, right. I know you still be texting her."

"Okay. Yeah what's the problem with that?"

"Don't you have a girlfriend?"

"What does my relationship have to do with you and Mercedes?"

"A hell of a lot! She's my girl now. Not yours. Stop the text messages or better yet text on special occasions."

The door opened and in walks Mercedes…

"Hi baby."

"How was the sound check?"

"It was good." She took a seat then looked in the mirror. "Sam! Samuel Evans! You made it!" She got up from her chair and gave him a hug a hug to extra for my liking."

"Don't hug her too tight. That's all mine." I was watching him hug her making sure he kept his hands where I could see them.

"Tank, he's just a friend."

"So, you say."

"Dude why are you looking at my girl like that? Like you want to want her back or something."

"I can't look at her."

"Yeah you can look at her but not like that look boo I'm going to get me something to eat. You want something?"

"No, I'm fine."

"Okay. When I get back I hope your ass is gone, she got a man a real man, and not some punk ass want to be model."

I left them alone but I really did I stood by the door and listened in on her conversation with this Sam guy.

"You know I still love you."

"Sam you know I'm with Tank and don't you have a girlfriend."

"Had….we broke up."

"Why?"

"I'm looking at the reason right now."

"You talked about me all the time or it was because you texted me."

"None of those reasons you said. The reason and the only reason will be she's not Mercedes Jones. 'Cedes, I'm going to be in many of relationships until I get you back I know this for a fact and every relationship I'm in with someone will end and you will be the cause and that's a good reason because I only want you I know you're with Tank and truth be told I don't know what you see in him but it pains me to see you with him. Whenever you come back to me, I'll break up with whoever I'm with just to be with you because they don't have the key to my heart. You do. Their keys and love are temporary your key and love is forever permanent."

PRESENT DAY

"Damn he said all of that! Shit! He'd break up with whoever he was with for her. That's love."

"Shut up and then he kissed her."

"Bro, but look would she do the same for you is the question?"

"Look, Dr. Phil, I know she would we got a son together."

"True. True. Speaking of you son. What does TJ stand for?"

"Tank Junior. Why?" I was still playing with this iPhone of hers I found whoever owns this phone is still paying the bill. I might as well start using it.

"I don't think so…your mother found his birth certificate online and his name his full name is Thaddeus Joshua Evans-Jones."

"WHAT?! SHE DIDN'T NAME MY SEED MY SON AFTER ME! THIS IS BULLS HIT! HOW COULD SHE?! WHERE THE HELL SHE GET EVANS FROM?! MY SON DON'T EVEN HAVE MY LAST NAME!"

"You just finding out your own sons name?"

"Hell yeah I thought it was just TJ."

"Were you there when he was born?"

"Fuck no. She pissed me off that week I was somewhere else doing me."

"So, you left your girlfriend 9 months pregnant with your baby to have alone?"

"Yeah."

"What kind of deadbeat motherfucker are you?! I'm out here I shot a dude and I think I killed him for what?! You are a sorry ass excuse for a father. Do you even know his birth weight and his birthday?"

"9lbs 4oz June 1?"

"7lbs 5oz and he was born June 27th, tell your mother I'm out. Y'all are on y'all on."

I pushed him up against the door and pulled out my gun and pointed placed it on his forehead. "Look, snitch on my ass I'll snitch on you. I'll tell the cops it was you who shot dude I don't have a problem with that I don't. Your ass can leave now. I don't need you."

"Fine! Good luck on getting your son back."

Sam's POV

We arrived at the hospital and were greeted by the doctor who was all smiles.

"He's been asking for you guys for the longest time especially someone name TJ."

"That's me!"

"You're a lucky little kid to have him as your uncle."

"He's lucky to have me too."

"So, we're going back their first and then y'all can go back. I'm going to call you so you can see him. 'Kay."

"'Kay."

Mom, Dad, 'Cedes, Stacey and myself went back to his room thankfully mom left the stick at home. I guess she thought with all of this equipment they could fix his injuries but Mercedes had found plant outside and he was going to get it.

"Hi Stevie."

"Mom, Dad. What are you guys doing here? When did you get here?"

"We got here yesterday….we came by and saw you. You got shot. Do you remember that?" Mom kissed him.

"Yeah, I remember being shot."

"Okay. Do you remember who did it?" Mercedes asked.

"No, I don't …not now."

"Well, you're coming back so hopefully something will jog your memory."

"Yeah, I hope so. Hi 'Cedes."

"Hi I'm glad you're still here with us."

"I am too, sis."

"Don't ever do this again."

"I'll try not to. Bro?"

"I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?"

"I didn't protect 'Cedes and TJ." He started crying.

"Yes, you did. You protected them fine. You went above and beyond a little bit too above but I know why. No one messes with your family."

"Y-Yeah. Where's TJ?"

"He can't come back here but we thought of another way. Dad?" Dad set up the iPad and I called out to the lobby.

"Uncle Stevie! I love you!"

"I love you too my mini gamer VP and can I get a kiss."

"Sure.." Dad move the iPad towards him and he kissed the screen. "That made me feel better so much better your dad told you beat my time in Mario Kart Wii."

"You heard that?"

"Yeah, I heard you, Artie, Mom, Stacey, Dad, 'Cedes, Blaine, and Kurt talked to me and that…prayer TJ said."

"You heard my prayer? Which one? I pray a lot because mommy is Team Jesus."

"That's right baby so is daddy."

This prayer, "God in heaven hear my prayer keep me in thy loving care. Be my guide in all I do, bless all those who love me too. God Bless Aunt Brittany, Aunt Quinn, Aunt Rachel, Aunt Santana, Aunt Stacey, Uncle Kurt, Uncle Blaine, Uncle Artie, Uncle Puck, Uncle Stevie, Mommy and Daddy. Amen. TJ I just want to say God has truly blessed me 'because I got you and when I get better I'm taking you back to that playground."

"Uh….no. Sam, honey hand me that organism." Mercedes said. Uh-oh all of the adults came and spent time talking to Stevie it was nice having him back we only stayed for an hour and mom and dad stayed back because this time they're actually staying with him. Remember when they said they were going to beat up Stevie for the playground they sort of did and Santana bought her freaking stick and she really hit him with it. All of our family went back home which is great I love them but I can't wait to spend quality time with my family. TJ is grounded for a whole week, 'Cedes wasn't too thrilled knowing that TJ watched us so 4 days for watching mommy and I do it and 3 days for the door.

"Man, it was great hearing Stevie's voice and he heard us too. I didn't want to talk to him at first but I'm glad I did."

"Me too TJ's prayer that's the prayer when he first called you, daddy right?"

"Yeah. The cookout some weeks back."

"Baby, I have something I have to tell you."

"Is it good news or bad news because today has been a good news day."

"Well, it's about to get even better that pregnancy test I took…well I'm not pregnant."

TJ'S POV

I was listening at the door when I heard the best news ever!

"MOMMY IS NOT PREGNANT WITH TANKS BABY! THANK YOU JESUS! GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!

"Thaddeus Joshua Evans! Come here right now!" Mommy yelled! Darn it I know that tone. I ain't going in there. I'm going back to my room.

"Oops!"

JJ's POV

I'm going, going, back , back to Cali, Cali with my mom, dad, uncle, and the damn dog! She bought the dog. It's all good we're back in glorious California and we know where my sister is at. Off to the Evans Casa!

A/N: Guess you guys didn't see that coming! HAHAHAHA Updates coming out in a few hours. Let me catch these zzz's first.