Two days later, there was a knock at the door. Eleanora went to go answer it and found a strange woman with a suitcase standing there.
The woman raised her eyebrow and began examining Eleanora, her eyes drifting up and down, up and down…Eleanora forced a small, self-conscious laugh.
"Yes? Can I help you?"
"I," the lady announced grandly, "am Nina Hopkins!"
Eleanora blinked.
"That's…great…?"
The lady blinked back.
"…Surely you know who I am?"
"…No?"
"I am the great Nina Hopkins, the tailor!"
"Ohh…" Eleanora had always thought that merchants had to come in through the back door, but she was here now, so…"Did the Earl invite you?"
"Yes, he said that one of his maids was in desperate need of a new uniform." Nina gave Eleanora's dress a critical look. "I'm assuming that that's you?"
Eleanora frowned.
"I'm sure I don't know who the Earl meant," she said coldly, "but come in."
Nina didn't need to be invited twice; she breezed in and marched up the Earl's study, as if she had been there before.
"Hellooo, Lord Phantomhive!" she said, entering the room with Eleanora quietly trailing behind. "How are you? And—Oh." She scowled. "You still have the Stiff with you, I see."
"Nina," Ciel sighed, standing up. "Welcome. Have you already met Eleanora? She's the one who needs the uniform."
"Oh," Nina gave Eleanora another quick, cutting look. "I understand."
"What? Is there a problem?"
"Oh, nothing, my Lord," the tailor sighed. "It's just that…she doesn't have the most flattering features…"
"You're one to talk," Eleanora mumbled under her breath.
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
Sebastian smirked a bit.
"I don't care if her features are up to your standards or not," Ciel said, getting back to work. "Go and get her measurements and makes sure that she gets a proper uniform."
Nina scowled again, but agreed. Sebastian led the two women to a private room and then stood outside the door, making sure that no one would be going in by accident. His mind drifted to other topics, such as the lunch preparations and cats and whether or not the laundry had been washed and then he heard Nina yelp inside the room.
"That—What is that?"
Then Eleanora's calm voice:
"That? That's a gun."
"Well, what's it doing in your stocking?"
Sebastian closed his eyes, which was worse than keeping him open, as his mind could now conjure up the image even better.
"What—does it make you uncomfortable?"
"Yes it makes me uncomfortable!"
A sigh.
"Fine."
The sound of something clattering onto a table.
"Now then," Nina continued. "If there's nothing else—What is that?"
"That? That's another gun."
"Just how many guns do you have? How many do you even need? Why do you need them?!"
"For protection."
"Protection from what? Dust bunnies?!"
Silence. Sebastian could picture Eleanora's face. She was probably, as she would say, "pissed off."
"Well, as long as there aren't any more weapons around…" Nina sighed. "Well, what are you waiting for? Take the rest of your clothes off."
Sebastian groaned. He did not have to hear that.
"What—all of them?"
"Of course, all of them! I need to take your measurements!"
Sebastian heard a faint whimper, and then swishing sounds as layers of clothing were removed. He realized that he was mentally counting down from full dress to absolute nudity.
And Nina was still discovering weapons. She almost cut herself on a switchblade which had fallen out of Eleanora's corset.
Another silence, and then a low whistle.
"I take it all back," Nina said, impressed. "You do have a very nice figure…That horrible dress that you were wearing covered it all up. Just look at the size of those things!...Do you mind if I…?"
"What? Touch them? No, go ahead."
"Thank you!"
Sebastian groaned again. He desperately wanted to leave. But then Finny came by and asked if he could get something out of the room and Sebastian shooed him away. As soon as the gardener had left, Sebastian wondered if Nina was still touching Eleanora's…things. Then he wondered if he would ever get the chance to touch them.
"Don't think about it," he told himself. "Think about cats. Think about cats. Think about cats."
"And those legs! My goodness! They're so long and slender! And so smooth!"
"Think about cats, think about cats, think about cats…"
"Mmm, and your hips aren't so bad either..."
"IamthinkingaboutcatsIamthinkingaboutcatsIamthinkingaboutcats…"
Then Eleanora made a surprised noise that sounded like a kitten's mewl and Sebastian stopped thinking about cats.
For a while, all was silence. Sebastian listened to it gratefully. And then there was a crashing sound and the sound of someone shrieking and he instinctively threw open the door.
"What is it? What happened?"
Eleanora—still quite naked—was lying on the floor.
"I was standing on the stool," she said simply, "and Nina stumbled and pushed me and I lost my balance."
"Uh...huh…"
"What are you doing!" Nina screamed. "Shame on you! Infiltrating a lady's dressing-room! You pervert!" Nina grabbed an item of clothing and threw it at Sebastian, who dodged it and closed the door, breathing hard.
The item had landed on the opposite side of the hallway, in full view of Sebastian. He stared at it for a time, wondering what it was. And then he realized and his stomach dropped. He called out,
"Eleanora…Your k…Your…k…"
"My what?"
He cleared his throat and tried again.
"Your k…Your ko…Your cor…"
"You mean my corset?"
Sebastian nodded, even though Eleanora couldn't possibly have seen it.
Another sigh, and then Nina shouted,
"Don't go out there! Then he'll see!"
"So what?"
The door opened and Sebastian immediately looked away, his face unnaturally hot.
"Oh, there it is."
He watched Eleanora pick up the corset and turn to go back into the room. He looked away again.
"What is it? Your face is bright red." Eleanora stood in front of him and felt his forehead. "Are you sick? Or…Oh no. Don't tell me that you're embarrassed?"
Sebastian cleared his throat again.
"What kind of a butler are you if you can't stand seeing a woman naked?" Eleanora grinned and lightly hit his face with her corset as she strode into the room.
The door shut and Sebastian collapsed onto the floor. He felt something running from his nose—blood.
"What did I do?" he asked no one in particular in his mind. "What did I do to deserve such punishment?"
But, of course, nobody answered him.