Chapter 5

Meanwhile, back in New York, Addison had just gotten out of surgery. She was happy; both mom and baby were going to be fine. She looked at the clock; it was already 10 p.m. Babies decide to come at all hours. She had known that her nights could be long when she decided to specialize in ob/gyn. She just loved the feeling of helping to bring a baby into the world. She went into her office, and scanned through her emails before leaving. She smiled when she saw one from Derek, with a picture of him and his daughter. "Hi Addie," he wrote,"You were right again. Here's a photo of my daughter Chrissy and me. She is wonderful! I'm so glad you figured out that baby Grace was my daughter." Addie smiled; she felt vindicated. She had known Dr. Bailey's call was for one reason alone – to get Derek to be tested for his daughter. They were so lucky that he was a match.

Then the door burst open. Addie starred as two of her favorite Shepherds, Nancy and Kathleen, walked into her room. She smiled. She had spent so many hours shopping with them; the two of them loved shoes even more than she did. They had so many great times together when she was married to their brother and even before. But she hadn't seen them for a while now, not since they had filed for divorce. She missed the Shepherd family holidays; they were so much more fun than those with Bizzy and the Captain. "We know it's late, Addie, but we checked the schedule and saw you were going to be in surgery at least til 9:30 p.m."

"What brings you here this hour of the night?" Addie smiled.

"Derek sent this photo to mom," asked Nancy, holding up a 8x11 photo of Derek and Chrissy.

"Derek sent me a copy," she said, continuing to smile.

"Oh," said Nancy, surprised that Derek was still in touch with Addie. "That slutty intern is passing off a sick kid as Derek's," said Nancy.

"She's his daughter," said Addie.

"Has Derek done a DNA test?" asked Nancy.

"He doesn't need to. He is an exact HLA match to the daughter of a woman he slept with at the time she was conceived. Besides, look at her eyes in the picture. They're just like his, piercing blue."

"Addie, maybe the slutty intern sleeps with lots of men with piercing blue eyes. Derek's not the only one with piercing blue eyes. But maybe Derek's the only one with boatloads of money. Maybe she wants his money to pay for her child's medical care."

Addison laughed. "You think Meredith is after Derek for his money? She's the daughter of Ellis Grey. She has plenty of money. And she has never asked Derek for a dime in child support. And she didn't even call him to ask him to be tested. Another doctor from Seattle Grace, Dr. Bailey, asked Derek to spearhead a bone marrow drive to find a match for an anonymous child. He agreed to be tested before he even thought she could be his child."

"Why do you think this is funny? Aren't you hurt? This baby was born when you were married to Derek," said Kathy.

"It's my fault, you know. If I hadn't slept with Mark in my home – the one I shared with Derek, he wouldn't have discovered us and left for Seattle. I cheated first. And Derek made a sincere effort to mend our marriage. That's why we came back to NY. But we couldn't. And now I'm happy. I'm married to Jake, and we're expecting a baby. I haven't told Derek yet, so please don't tell him. I want to be the one to let him know."

"But still. she had this baby, assuming it's Derek's, and she never let him know until she was sick."

"Derek could never have given our marriage a real shot if he had known Meredith was pregnant or that he had a baby. By keeping silent, she was doing me a favor. You can't blame her for that."

"I still think Derek should insist on a DNA test," said Nancy.

"That's up to Derek, but, if I were you, I wouldn't go there. Derek is dealing with a lot now. He believes, for good reason, that Chrissy is his daughter, and her life is in danger. I'm sure he is scared and worried. He needs your support."

"But it would be easier for him is he knew she is not his daughter," said Kathy.

"But Derek and I both believe that she is his daughter. So does Dr. Bailey and Meredith. You have no good reason to believe that she is not his daughter. The fact he is such a close HLA match is pretty good evidence she's his daughter." Addie paused. "I'm sure it's scary to think you have a niece you never met who is so sick. But Derek needs your support, and he may even need more help. You should let Derek know that you support him and you'll help anyway you can."

"I'll think about it," said Nancy, "But I am going to suggest he get a DNA test anyway. If it is positive, then I can accept her as my niece." Nancy and Kathy then left the room

Derek woke up when he heard his cell phone ringing. He looked at the caller id and thought for a moment before answering it. "Hi Nancy, how are you?"

"Just fine. How are you doing?"

"Thrilled to be a dad, but scared because my daughter has cancer. I imagine Mom told you the story."

"Yes, she did. How sick is the girl?"

"My daughter Chrissy, you mean. She has leukemia, and so far it has been resistant to chemo. The doctor is hoping to get it in remission, and then he'll do a bone marrow transplant. I'm a match."

"It's good you're a match."

"Quite a miracle, actually. It's only 1 out of 200 that a parent will be the match."

"Derek, it sounds like you have gotten really attached to the girl."

"Yes. Once I realized she was likely my daughter, I got attached even before I saw her. Now that I met her, I'm very attached."

"I think that before you get more attached, you should get a DNA test."

"She's my daughter, and I don't need a DNA test to prove it. If you want a DNA test to accept her as your niece, then you're going to miss out on a lot with Chrissy and with me. Chrissy's mom has made her room a negativity-free zone. I'm making my life a negativity-free zone while we're fighting Chrissy's cancer, so if you don't want to support me and Chrissy, that's fine. Just stay away."

"I'm just worried about you."

"You don't need to worry about me. I'm a big boy. I fell in love with Meredith, but I felt I needed to make my marriage work. I've missed out on three years with Chrissy, and I need to make sure that she lives. That's my goal. So if you're not with me on this, then I don't need you in my life right now."

"Derek, I'm your sister."

"I wouldn't ask you to abandon one of your children. You're welcome to support me and Chrissy. It's your choice."

"Derek . . . "

"Call me back when you're ready to support me and welcome Chrissy to the Shepherd family. Good-bye." Derek hung up the phone. He smiled, remembering Izzie's nickname for his sister Nancy, McBitchy. Izzie was certainly right.

He glanced at his phone and noted he had two new texts. The first read "Congrats on my new niece. Tell her Aunt Amy loves her and can't wait to meet her." The second read, "Hi Derek, I'm eager to meet my new niece. When can I come? Is there anything I can do to help? I'm praying for her, Love Lizzie." Derek smiled. At least he had two of his sisters on his side. Then his phone rang again, and he answered, "Hi Kathy. How are you?"

"I'm fine. How are you feeling?"

"Thrilled to be a dad, but scared for my daughter. I take it Mom has told all of you about Chrissy. I got sweet texts from Amy and Lizzie."

"That's great. Have you heard from Nancy?"

"Yes, she called this morning. She won't accept Chrissy without a DNA test."

"That's not completely unreasonable. It is pretty common to use DNA to establish paternity when the parents aren't married."

"Well, it is unreasonable in this case. Modern science has already determined I'm a perfect HLA match; the doctor at the National Bone Marrow Center thought it was very unusual to have such a close match without being related."

"Well, maybe they would find it useful to have proof that you are related."

"I'm not interested in scientific research on related donors right now. I know I'm a match, and I know I'm her dad. Meredith told Chrissy I'm her dad. She would only do that because I'm her dad."

"But a DNA test would make Nancy more comfortable in accepting her . . ."

"I don't care what Nancy thinks. Right now, I'm much more interested in what Chrissy's mom thinks. And I'm not going to tell her that I want a DNA test. My goal right now is to spend as much time as possible with Chrissy. Telling her Mom I don't l believe her is not going to help."

"You could just tell her that your sister recommended a DNA test."

"Meredith has already met Nancy. Her friend Izzy nicknamed her McBitchy. I'm not going to tell Meredith and her friends that I care what Nancy thinks because I don't. I know Chrissy's my daughter. So you're either with me on this, or not. Anyway, as a therapist would you recommend asking the mom of a girl who has leukemia which is not yet in remission for a DNA test?"

Derek heard nothing but silence. "That's what I thought. I'm not going to have any time for anyone who's not with me on this. Anyway, I have to go. I have medical appointments this morning for more tests to make sure I'm really a good match. Think about what I said."

"Okay. Good luck with the tests."

"Thanks."

Derek went to the hospital and gave some more blood and marrow samples for testing. Then he returned to the hall outside Chrissy's room. He saw Cristina, who greeted him with a big smile.

"Hi Dr. Shepherd," said Cristina.

"Dr. Yang, you look happy to see me," said Derek, surprised at her big smile. He couldn't recall a single time when she had smiled at him before. She rarely smiled at all, as he recalled.

"Of course. You're here to save my goddaughter's life."

"Goddaughter?"

"Yes. Of course my person's daughter is my goddaughter. And thank you so much for coming."

"She's my daughter, Dr. Yang. I would have been here for her birth, if I knew about her."

"I know." Cristina said.

"And I just met her yesterday."

"You walked away, Derek."

"Not from my daughter. I had no idea I had a daughter."

"I know. It wasn't my place to tell. Now you know. Don't walk away now. Chrissy's been talking about how much she loved meeting her daddy since she woke up this morning. She was thrilled to meet you. Please don't yell at Meredith. She's had a very rough time."

"I could have helped."

"You're helping now. That's all we need. Now why are you lurking outside Chrissy's room?"

"I need to talk to Meredith."

"But this is not a good time. Bailey didn't say you could meet Meredith today, did she?"

Derek looked at her with puzzlement. "Bailey told us the ground rules. We knew you could meet Chrissy if you asked, but you need to stay away from Mer. Mer is a total wreck. I don't think she can handle seeing you now."

"I need to ask her something."

"What? You can ask me. I'm Mer's person."

"My mom wants to skype with Chrissy at 5 p.m. today. She wants to see her granddaughter. She went to mass today and prayed for her, and she's asked the whole parish and our whole family to pray for her. It thought I should ask Mer's permission."

"I'm sure it's fine, Derek. Let me ask her, and I'll let you know." Christina smiled.

"And one more thing. I need a copy of her birth certificate."

"Her birth certificate?"

"Yes." Derek smiled. He wanted to see Christine Grey Shepherd in print, but there was another reason, one he was happy to share with Cristina. "I called my health insurance carrier, and, if I fax her birth certificate, they can add her to my policy. I already made it a family policy before I flew out here. I knew baby Grace was my daughter. All this medical care costs lots of money, and I want to contribute my fair share."

"That's great, Derek. I'll ask Mer about it. I don't think it's a problem, but you should know that the hospital has been great about the medical costs; they've waived most of the co-payments."

Cristina smiled again at Derek, and walked into Chrissy's room. She saw that Chrissy was sleeping, and Meredith was staring at her daughter, savoring each second with her. "Hi, Mer."

"Hi, Chris. I'm so worried. They're doing more tests today. She has to go into remission or else they won't be able to do the transplant."

"Mer, only positive thoughts are allowed here. If you want, I'll buy you a drink at Joe's."

"I can't leave her."

"You can when Derek is with her. By the way, I just spoke to Derek."

Meredith lifted her eyes and looked at Christina's.

"What's up?"

"The whole baby Grace anonymity has been blown, you know."

Meredith smiled and looked at her daughter. "I know. He met her yesterday. She was thrilled to meet her dad. I just wish I'd swallowed my pride and called him when she was a baby. They have both missed so much."

"He's going to save her life, and they'll have many years to spend together, Mer."

"I hope so. What did he want? To yell at me?"

"I don't think he can yell at you now." Christina said, looking at her friend, who was very pale and thin herself; the past five weeks of worrying and sleepless nights had left her weak physically although she tried her best to be strong for Chrissy. "Actually, he's told his mom about Chrissy, and she want to skype with Chrissy at 5. I told him I didn't think it would be a problem, but I'd check with you."

Meredith looked up at Christina. "No problem. What have I done? I kept my daughter from her dad but also from her grandma and her aunts and uncles and cousins. What was I thinking?"

"Meredith, you did what you thought was best. And she has had a big, loving family here. There's a reason we called her baby Grace; none of us, besides you, may be related by blood, but she has dozens of aunts and uncles here. She has a lot of love in her life, and she knows it. Don't worry about what's in the past. Focus on today for Chrissy."

"She should meet her family. I'm sure she'd love to."

"Ok. I'll tell Derek. He also wants her birth certificate. He says it's to add her to his health insurance policy. I think he just wants to see Derek Shepherd, father, on the birth certificate."

"Well, that's what it says."

"I know. I saw you write it. I couldn't believe it then. But now I know you knew what you were doing. It's great that he's here."

"It's amazing that he dropped everything and came and donated the marrow." Meredith looked at Cristina.

"Not amazing at all," said Cristina. "It is really the minimum one could expect of a dad."

Meredith smiled. "You may think so, but I don't think Thacher would have flown across the country to give me his marrow. And he had spent the first five years of my life with me."

"Meredith, I know your dad sucked. But Derek is a good man and he always wanted to be a dad. And he would have come even if Chrissy wasn't his daughter."

"He just didn't know he had a daughter. And that's on me."

"You can fix that now. She's going to be fine. You're going to have a chance to work things out."

"Okay. Tell Derek he can have three hours with her today, 4 to 7. That way I'll have a chance to go home and get some fresh clothes. I haven't been home for weeks. I guess it's useful having a second parent in the picture."

"Meredith, you know we're always happy to sit with Chrissy and give you a break."

"I know. I just don't like hovering here while he's with her." Meredith paused. "You can also tell him that he's welcome to come to the treatment team meeting tomorrow morning. It's going to be at 10, here in the conference room."

"Okay. And I'll take you to Joe's at 6."

Chris walked out of the hospital room and immediately saw Derek. "She said you can have 4 to 7 with her. And skyping with your Mom is no problem. I'm going to take her to Joe's for a drink and a burger. And I'll get you the birth certificate. And she also says you can come to the treatment team meeting tomorrow, at 10, in the conference room, if you're going to still be around."

Derek smiled. He was going to have a chance to see Meredith tomorrow, even if it was under difficult circumstances. He just hoped the doctor would have some good news. "I'm staying til Sunday. I want to spend as much time as possible getting to know my little girl. I'll be at the treatment team meeting, and I'd like to see Chrissy every day while I'm here. I know this is tough on Meredith; it's tough on me, and I've only known Chrissy for a day.""

"Okay."