Thanks to everyone that's still reading, finally finished. Also thank you to everyone that's reviewed this story. Not sure if everyone's still reading but for those who are enjoy.. The end!
Chapter 11
2016- The arguement
"Listen Ames.. No it's not like that." I hear Stevens frustrated voice. "He's changed, the kids love him.. No of course he didn't escape.. Listen bring the kids over you can even be there. Okay love ya, give the kids a kiss from us. Yeah, see ya."
He appears moments later, a guilty look on his face, "Everything okay?" I ask him,
"Yeah, it weren't gonna be easy was it?" He says.
I nod along to him, "Ye needing me to go?" I know before I say it he's not going to like the idea but I can't not offer.
"Go where?" He frowns,
"Anywhere, if Amy won't let ye see the kids.."
He stops me by raising his hand to silence me, "Don't be daft! She'll come round, where do you get these ideas from."
I don't think he understands its because I love him, I would do anything for him. Even if it meant I couldn't be with him. "It was just a thought." I shrug.
"Well don't think if that's the things you come up with." I think he's being serious but when I look back at him he's smiling, letting me know that its a joke. I know everything will be okay, can feel it in my bones. So I hug him and kiss his forehead he has a frown on his face but the only word that can describe the look in his eyes is wonderment. I still can't believe that anyone would look at me like that, especially someone that knows me as well as him, the good and the bad.
2017- Brendan proposes
"Steven ye know I love ye right?" I say after a steamy session, we're lying on the bed, Stevens back against my chest.
"Yeah course." He frowns, turning towards me, he sits up further when he sees how the nerves are taking over me "Bren what's up? You've went so pale, has something happened?"
I swallow my pride and force myself to get out the bed to reach for my jacket that's on the floor before getting the small silky box, "I'm asking ye to marry me." I say simply and open the box. It's taken months for me to get the courage to do it, I've had the ring for weeks, putting it in my pocket until it felt right.
If I don't do it now I don't know when I will. He lets out a deep sigh of relief before he pulls me back towards him onto the bed, he smiles up at me and I can feel the love radiating of him as he takes the ring box off me, a slight blush across his cheeks while kneeling up on the bed shuffling closer to me.
"I don't know if its your thing, we can take it back if you want to change it." My voice cracks with the emotions coursing through me, I quickly wipe away the dampness from my cheeks hoping he hasn't noticed it.
He shakes his head before clearing his throat, "No Bren- It's perfect." He gives me a wobbly smile. It's a white gold band, plain, expensive. Worth it.
"We'll need to get you one won't we? Like do you want to get matching ones- course you might not want this one but.." He must see the fond grin on my face because he stops mid flow, "What?"
"I'm just glad ye like it." I admit, "Matching one sounds like a good idea." It sounds personal.
"I love you." He tells me, a stray tear running down his face but it isn't a sad tear thankfully.
I wrap him in my arms, he's still got the box in his hand so I pull away slightly and take it from him, taking the ring and Stevens hand in mine, before looking back at him, he's glowing with pure happiness and I slide it on his ring finger before pressing my lips to it.
Another tear rolls down his face but he's still smiling, "I love ye Steven. More than anything." The rest of the night consists of us kissing, touching
and eventually I make love to him, it seems only right that's how it is tonight, gentle and a slow build up to our climax, complete body worship and he's the only man that I would ever share this with. He knows this, has to know this by now.
One of Lucas's football games
"Come on Lucas!" I shout before cheering when he scores, I hear Brendan clapping from beside me,
"I forgot how proud ye got at these games." He grins, I can see the pride in his eyes aswell,
I shove into him "Shut up, I'm being supportive ain't I?"
"That's all yeah?" He says back with a grin, I see Leah barreling into his side, "Hi!" She squeals with a laugh, knowing she's gave him a mini heart attack.
He picks her up, she's eleven but he still manages to lift her like she weighs a feather, she's all giggles as she's swung about in the air like a rag doll, she looks so young and carefree, Brendan seems to have that effect on people.
Soon we're joined by Amy, her husband nowhere to be seen. She gives me a warm hug and I give her a kiss on the cheek. She turns to Brendan and gives him a small smile, They've not seen each other since our engagement party, they finally managed to clear the air between them after we all had one too many of Amy's fiancée's home made strawberry martinis- which were deadly to say the least.
I can tell they've somehow managed to get onto the same level, after we argued on the phone she brought the kids over the following weekend, she stayed with them the full day I could tell Brendan wanted to leave, run away from it but he faced the music and it was worth it otherwise he wouldn't be here at this game today.
"Did you see Lucas score Bren?" Leah brings me back to the present, my pet name seems to have rubbed off, after she had grew out of the daddy Brendan stage that's what she's called him, 'Bren'. It warms my heart the bond they have, even when Brendan was away in jail she remembered him.
"Yeah it was a topper wasn't it?" Brendan says, Amy frowns at the use of words and I try and fail to hold back a laugh.
"It was, but I get bored after a while, they just run up and down and up and down.."
"Leah it's important to your brother." Amy scolds, "he goes to your dancing displays."
Leah folds her arms, both mother and daughter in the same stance, and I look at Brendan who rolls his eyes before I look back at the pitch. "I don't ask him to go though mum!" She sounds affronted like the last thing she wants is her brother there.
"How about we go get some food Leah? That way Lucas will have something for when he finishes?" Brendan suggests and I know he'll use any excuse to get away from Amy.
Amy scowls at him for intervening but Leah is already by his side grinning, he's already looking at me for my input but he doesn't need to ask me.
"As long as you do as your told Leah." I say before my eyes are yet again back at the pitch, I roll my eyes, they should know better than to speak to me when were at one of Lucas's matches seen as every time we come I barely speak to any of them and hardly take my eyes off the pitch. I get too into the games.
"Don't bother jumping into a pub on the way Brendan!" Amy shouts after they start retreating, I roll my eyes she should know better than to think he would even dream of it.
They walk away hand in hand and I turn to Amy, she's fighting a scowl,
"Nobody can seem to resist the Brady charm eh?"
I laugh, "If that were the case ya wouldn't have that look on your face."
She quickly recovers and I know she's about to apologise but there's no point, we're used to it now. I'm not sure how I would feel if Brendan and her did get on, the thought sending shivers down my spine. I turn back towards the pitch hoping this time I won't get disturbed again.
2019- The wedding
I wait at the aisle for him, the room is filled with smiling faces but I don't take a lot of them in, I see Declan and Paddy beside Leah and Lucas. Leah sending me a quick wink and grin. Even as a teenager she loves spending time with her 'daddy Brendan'.
Eileen, Amy and Mitzeee are gossiping between themselves. Somehow they have formed some sort of friendship and that alone scares the life out of me. I see Nate come through the doors and get disappointed when I see it isn't Steven. He gives me the thumbs up before taking a seat beside Lucas who gives him a high five.
That's when James, my nephew appears, even though he's tiny, only four, right enough he's still dressed in a sharp black suit and he grins at me before Chez and Steven appear.
They both look close to tears and Cheryl whispers something to Steven making him nod and give her a lop sided smile. Before I know it I've got a stupid big grin across my face and I need to stop my legs from moving to met him, it would've been a good idea to glue my feet to the floor but even that wouldn't stop me.
He looks gorgeous, we both went for matching suits, black with white ties. I at one point joked to Steven about wearing kilts, he was mortified until his eyes lit up when he realised it would mean going commando.
We don't have any best men or bridesmaids, didn't want any of that. Steven insisted that Chez should walk down the aisle with him and I knew if I rejected that I would have both of them to deal with and that's something nobody could handle.
I've been that lost in my thoughts that I hadn't even realised Steven was right infront of me, grinning widely his eyes sparkling. I would kiss him now if I could,
"Dearly beloved we are gathered here today in holy matrimony.." The priest carries on, I zone out.
There's no need to pay attention to anyone else apart from Steven, were both grinning like idiots and I can see the unshed tears in his eyes, knowing mine are the same.
We both go through our vows never once taking our eyes off the other. It isn't until we've both said our I dos and kissing that I remember anyone else is in the room, when our guests start cheering. It's embarrassing and heart warming all in the one.
2020- Leah's 16th birthday
I can't believe it, my little girl sixteen. She's growing up, and it all seems to have caught up with me at the one moment, she's starting to become a woman. Sticking her head in at school and she's fitted into the right social circle.
There's a few of her friends here today, Louisa, Emily and Kate. The rest is just family, Brendan and myself are here, I cooked the food and Brendan attempted to help but ended up just leaning against the unit watching me cook away, it didn't intimidate me. I still feel relaxed even with his hot gaze on me.
Declan and paddy were meant to be here but they've been busy with work and uni so couldn't make it, Declan and Leah had a connection pretty much straight away, whereas Paddy was a little withdrawn, and Lucas was his usual shy way. They quickly grew onto each other, fighting and laughing like normal siblings do.
I look around the crowded backgarden taking in all the faces, Brendan, Sinead, Amy, Brian, Lucas, Leah and her friends in the corner. Laughing and drinking some of Amy's smoothies. There's other people there, from the village and Amy's friends and family.
Us all being together today makes me smile, everyone getting on even Amy and Brendan have been chatting away. My thoughts go to the birthday girl, her laughing away but she catches my eye and grins before nodding her head.
There isn't a feeling like it in the world than seeing your kids grow up well, that thankfully all the hard work and tears have paid off.
2022- Declan's wedding.
I've never been so proud in my life, seeing Deccy standing on the altar with his new bride, grinning proudly. Elieen's crying with happiness and I wrap my arms around my ex wife. It's strange, she's not changed much over the years apart from a few more wrinkles here and there and the odd grey hair. I see Steven smiling over at me with a now fully grown Leah and Lucas beside them.
And I can't help but wonder where the time has went, my oldest kid now married and a successful accountant while Leah is starting the same uni that Paddy is in and Lucas is working on his football for the next few years, hoping to get some sort of scholarship.
They've all grew up and I'm glad that I at least got to see a part of it. Kimberly, Declan's bride is the happiest I've ever seen her, glowing with happiness and slightly tipsy from the champagne she had to calm her nerves.
I know that I will eventually need to toast to the bride and groom and I'll need to say my speech, Steven helped me write it but now that its nearing I don't feel like I even need to bit of paper.
I'm lucky with how everything has worked out between me and the kids, all of them, how they've all accepted me and each other into one another's life's, Steven aswell. I'm lucky that we can go to Eileen or Amy's for lunch without an argument kicking off. How my friends are now Stevens and vice versa. How Steven and Cheryl still have a bond that I don't understand, even after everything.
I'm lucky that I can live the rest of my life with everyone that I love close to me, that I don't need to look over my shoulder.
2025- Stendan in Dublin
We came back, Steven said it would be a good idea for our anniversary, I corrected him that it was only December our anniversary wasn't until April but he shook his head,
"Not that one."
And straight away I knew what he was talking about, I had booked them for the day that he had came to that hotel room.
We do everything we had done the last time we were here, I show him my sights, we even try Guinness at the same place we did before.
It feels like déjà vu walking along that peir before we go back to my dahs pub, we don't go in it like before but we walk by it, Steven shooting me a nervous look. It was the one place I was dreading going but my feet just carried me there, it was the first time I properly spoke to Steven about my dah.
We go out for dinner before I take him back to the bridge, we share glances at one another, smirks and flirty looks.
Here we are, standing on the same bridge that we had previously stood on years and years before. In completely different circumstances. I look at Steven standing beside me leaning onto the bridge railing. Before I repeat what I had done before and take his face into my hands,
He's set me free.
Thanks so so much to everyone that read this, hope yous enjoyed!