Chapter 39 - The Difficult Decision
It had been a week since Amy had gotten the invitation in the letter from Penny, and she still hadn't responded, it was making her feel really bad, like she was a terrible friend. What made things worse was the reason she hadn't responded was because she was a coward, she had been unable to talk to Sheldon about it the whole time, causing her delay in responding to her friend. She had been afraid he would say he wouldn't go and she so badly wanted to go, but not without him, so her need to go and her need to be with him were tearing her up. She especially didn't want to hurt him by leaving him, he was her fiancé and she loved him, so that is why she would never go without him. With that all going on, Amy had welcomed Bernadette's call that morning to go to lunch, she had to talk to someone about her situation and since her petite friend was involved almost as much as her she thought maybe she could help.
Bernadette was actually already doing a favor for someone when she called Amy, Penny, who had asked her see if she could get Amy to respond without letting her know it was Penny who was asking. Bernadette was more than happy to help Penny and she actually felt sorry for Amy, she had been a bystander to all the drama that happened between Leonard and Penny, and Sheldon, so her heart went out to Amy who had been caught up in the middle of all that. She also knew that Amy being engaged now would have a big impact on any decisions she made and she explained that to Penny who understood, just wanting Amy to tell her one way or the other, so she could make plans. So Bernadette called Amy for lunch, hoping to address both of her friends concerns and try to help both of them in this difficult decision.
The one mistake Bernadette had made was discuss her plan to Howard, the night before while they were in bed, her only motivation being to discuss her plan for the next day out loud to someone to see if it made sense. She never meant it to be a suggestion for Howard to do something or even for him to help, but once the seed was planted in her husband's mind there was no turning back. Bernadette would have never been able to sleep that well that night if she had known the comforting talk she had with her husband had actually set in motion a plan by Howard to address the subject head on with Sheldon. So the next day, while she picked up Amy for lunch, she had no idea that Howard and Raj would go looking for Sheldon as they went to the cafeteria that day.
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"Hey can we join you." Howard asked, obviously surprising Sheldon who looked up at them for a few moments speechless.
"I thought you two weren't my friends anymore?" Sheldon finally asked after getting over his initial shock.
"Nah, we're just mad at you." Howard nonchalantly responded, as he and Raj both took seats at the table Sheldon was sitting.
Sheldon actually didn't know what to say, he missed them and he really didn't want them to leave, so "Oh, I see." was the only thing that came to his mind.
They began eating and had been eating in relative silence for a minute when Howard decided he had to address the subject with Sheldon, "So Sheldon have you heard that Leonard and Penny are getting married in a few weeks?"
Sheldon looked up at Howard trying to keep his face impassive, "No I haven't and why do you think I would care?" Sheldon responded but he was not able to keep a little twitch off his face. Sheldon was actually surprised and a little upset that no one had told him until now and wondered if this was part of the isolation he heard about when friends stopped being friends.
Here we go Howard thought, "Well I thought you would care because Penny asked Amy to be one of her bridesmaids."
Sheldon was stunned and just looked at Howard, he was actually at a loss for words again, about why Amy had not told him this before. He actually didn't realize he had been quiet for enough time for it to become uncomfortable at the table until Howard spoke again, "Sheldon did you hear me?"
Sheldon quickly regained his composure, "Of course I heard you." he responded defensively, then, "It is just news to me, no one told me." again wondering, 'Why didn't Amy tell me?' not realizing he was talking out loud.
"Because she is scared that you will tell she can't do it and she wants to be there for her friend." Howard answered for him.
Sheldon quickly looked back at Howard, he was still recovering from the shock of the news while desperately trying to regain his composure, so he just blurted out what was first came to mind. "Amy is a big girl, she can do what she wants, I won't stop her."
"Yes you will, you will refuse to go, so she won't go because she loves you." Howard responded quickly, using some of the exact words Bernadette told him last night.
"And you will break her heart." Raj added, causing Sheldon to look at him in surprise.
Sheldon just sat there looking at Howard and Raj, again not knowing how to respond to them. He also couldn't explain how Raj's statement about breaking Amy's heart bothered him so much, but he knew he didn't want to do that. "Why will it break her heart?" he asked quietly.
"Sheldon, girls love weddings and they are special, when it is theirs or a best friends. You know Amy and Penny are best friends and now Penny asked her to be a bridesmaid, Amy is probably dying to go." Raj explained
Quietly and without his previous arrogance, Sheldon repeated, "Amy can go, I won't stop her."
"No she won't, not without you." Howard responded, again repeating what Bernadette told him.
"She loves you and she is going to marry you, so she won't go without you." Raj added.
Sheldon sat and thought for a second, "Well maybe that is what she should do, support me and stay with me."
"Really! Amy is too good for you." Raj blurted out.
"What?…..What do you mean?" Sheldon asked in shock.
"Sheldon she is always doing things for you and something big comes up in her life and you can't compromise at all. One thing I learned being married, is marriage is doing things for each other that you normally wouldn't do, just to make your spouse happy." Howard explained to him, he was always having to explain to Sheldon and sometimes he wondered if it was all worth it.
"What about my happiness?" Sheldon countered
"Sheldon." Howard sighed and took a moment to calm himself. "If you love someone, making them happy makes you happy. You should try it sometime."
"Dude, he is right you know." Raj added
Sheldon looked from Howard to Raj and back, again not knowing what to say in response to them. He also was thinking about Amy, he did like happy Amy better than sad Amy and he really was at a loss to even understand sad Amy. He looked down at his plate and noticed almost all his food was gone, making his mind realize that this was a good excuse for him to go. "Well I have to get back to work gentlemen, good day." He then stood up, took his tray and left.
Howard watched Sheldon all the way out of the cafeteria door, slowly shaking his head as he disappeared into the hall. "Bernadette is going to kill me."
"Why, what do you mean." Raj looked at him confused.
"She didn't really tell me to talk to Sheldon about this, she just said she was going to talk to Amy." Howard explained.
"Dude, you are right she is going to kill you." Raj agreed.
"I better call my mom and see if I can stay with her a few days." Howard said with a sigh.
Raj just shook his head, Raj always had a crush on Bernadette, but right now he was glad he wasn't Howard. "You are so screwed." Howard just looked at him and nodded.
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Sheldon sat at the desk in his office, it had been two hours since lunch and he still hadn't gotten anything done, Howard and Raj's exact words still going through his mind, his eidetic memory a curse sometimes. Amy wanted to go to Penny's wedding, but she would not go without him because she love him, so if he didn't go it would break her heart. Of course he didn't want to go, he was mad at both Penny and Leonard, what happened with the baby was inexcusable and he had every right to be mad. But as he sat there he knew that was partially a lie, he was also mad at Penny because of something deeper, she had taken Leonard away from him, first with agreeing to marry him, and then that drunken night causing him to move out forever. At least the marriage would have allowed Leonard to remain his friend, but now after that night, Leonard didn't even want to be around him anymore. Sheldon had never had a best friend before Leonard and although he always told everyone he didn't need him, he actually missed him.
Amy had become his secondary best friend, sort of like Penny but different, in many ways closer, sometimes even closer than Leonard. He didn't want to loose that with her, he needed her, he did not want to be alone anymore, not after having friends before, he needed people now more than he would ever let on, he had changed. Then there was Raj's words 'he would break her heart if he didn't go', Sheldon did not want to break Amy's heart, he had feelings for her that he could only describe as 'Love' and those feelings made him understand that if he 'broke Amy's heart' he would not be happy either. This was a more confusing problem that the one on his white board because he knew from past experience with Amy there was no right equation that would solve it, so he just sat there and kept going over it in his mind the rest of the afternoon.
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The ride back to the apartment was quiet for both Amy and Sheldon, both lost in their own thoughts about the same subject, each not brave enough to start a conversation up about it. Amy was afraid to hear Sheldon's answer when she brought it up and Sheldon didn't really want to address the whole thing, even if he did know they had to discuss it. So they were in the apartment, Amy making tea for both of them, when his phone dinged with an email from Howard, answering a question he had asked the engineer just before he left the University with Amy that day, after his afternoon of thinking and soul searching. That email was the final thing that pushed Sheldon to open his mouth, Howard's response confirming what Sheldon expected, so he looked at Amy nervously working around the kitchen and spoke, "Amy, I don't want to go to the wedding."
Amy turned around in shock to look at him, her heart now beating so loudly she thought even he could hear it. "How did you find out about it?"
"Howard and Raj told me." then Sheldon gave her a scolding look, "Why didn't I hear it from you, Amy?"
"Umm….." Amy didn't know what to say.
"You were scared to bring it up." Sheldon answered for her, repeating what Howard told him.
Amy just let out a sigh and nodded, "I'm sorry Sheldon."
Sheldon just nodded, "I don't want to go to the wedding, Amy."
Amy just nodded, trying to control the disappointment she felt, it wasn't really a surprise he didn't want to go but it still hurt because she really wanted to be there for Penny. "I'll let Penny know I won't be coming."
"Why would you do that? Just because I don't want to go, doesn't mean you shouldn't go. I understand Amy that you and Penny are still BFF's." Sheldon responded.
Amy shook her head, "We are BFF's but you are my fiancé Sheldon, you will always come first for me. I will not go without you."
"Oh, now I understand. Amy I didn't say I won't go to Nebraska with you, after all you will probably get bored with all Penny's relatives around talking about who married who's cousin, I just won't be attending the wedding." Sheldon explained.
Amy just stared at him, "You are going to Nebraska with me?"
"Of course, you are my fiancée, I could never let you go alone to the land of tipping cows without protection from all those rednecks. I will just be in the hotel on the internet working while the wedding is going on." Sheldon explained some more.
Amy was shocked, "Thank you Sheldon, but I can't just be at the wedding while you are alone at the hotel." She really appreciated he was trying but she was not going to leave him alone.
Sheldon was afraid of this part, he had worried about what options he had when he agreed to accompany her to Nebraska, it had been the one flaw in his plan. However, he did come up with a possible solution if she would just agree. "Amy, I could come for part of the reception, sort of after all the formal part is done and everyone is just having a good time and talking. Would that satisfy you?"
"Really you would do that?" Amy said again in shock.
Sheldon almost smiled, that was the limit of what he wanted to do and her accepting it was a relief. "Yes, you are my fiancée Amy and I want you to be happy." Sheldon's face didn't even come close to twitching and Amy noticed that.
"Oh Sheldon." Amy ran into his arms engulfing him in a hug, which made him feel like he was being squeezed by a boa, but if he was honest to himself he really didn't mind.
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"You did what!" Bernadette stared down at her husband.
Howard, noted that this was one of those times that Bernadette was really angry so chose his words carefully. "I talked with Sheldon, Honey, about the wedding."
"Do you know what a dedicate situation Amy was dealing with, what possessed you to do that, you probably ruined everything." Bernadette shot back.
Howard's phone dinged at that moment and he quickly looked at it to delay his answer to his wife. He was glad he did, "Sheldon confirmed the reservations, him and Amy are flying out on the same flight as us."
Bernadette's jaw dropped, "He did?" she squeaked out.
Howard now smiled, "Yes he did." he then gave his wife his phone for her to see.
"Oh" Bernadette said softly.
"Sooo I did good." Howard said with a smile.
"Yeah." Bernadette responded, wondering where she had put that Catholic School Girl's outfit, she was going to have to make it up to him for going off on him when he actually fixed things.
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Leonard had just finished shaving that morning when Penny came into the bathroom squealing, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him deeply. He loved seeing her happy and he loved her kissing him like she was doing now, so it was a few minutes before they actually came up for air. "Wow, you seem happy."
Penny nodded, "When I just looked at my phone this morning and I had emails from both Amy and Bernadette saying that Amy is coming to the wedding and will be my bridesmaid." She explained to him.
Leonard was really happy she had her friends coming to her wedding, he knew it meant a lot to Penny and he loved seeing her being excited about it. Penny had gotten visibly better the last one to two weeks, she was becoming more herself again, and just not herself from after the News Years, but more like herself before everything that happened. "That's great. Good thing you had that bridesmaid dress saved in her size."
"Yeah, I thought if did that it would be a good omen and would create positive karma for her to be there." Penny explained
Leonard gave her a look, "Really."
"Nah." Penny giggled, "I was just not taking any chances, since I bought them at a regular dress store, I could always return it if we didn't use it."
Leonard chuckled, "Okay, that I believe."
Penny then got serious, "Sheldon is coming, not to the wedding, but he will be there for the reception, Amy emailed me."
Leonard shrugged, he was not going to let Sheldon ruin his and Penny's wedding by allowing Sheldon to become a big deal, things were different between them, so he was just another guest, that's all. "Amy will be happy and we don't really have to force ourselves to socialize with a man who doesn't like to socialize."
Penny nodded, "I didn't think of that, but you are right, no big deal."
Leonard chuckled, she was thinking just like him, "Exactly no big deal." Then they both sort of sealed the deal, kissing again.
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Meryl also saw her daughter get better, and she knew it was mostly because of Leonard, the way he took care of her daughter, the genuine love he gave her made Meryl's heart soar, she couldn't have wanted a better man for Penny. Her husband had been right, Leonard was perfect for her and she now had the same feeling for Leonard that her husband had for him years before when he came back from visiting Penny excited about the man. It was like now, Leonard had taken Penny out to a movie, so she wouldn't have to deal with her parents watching her show, he had distracted her every time it was on since they had been there so they could watch it when Penny didn't want to even know it was on.
Meryl and Wyatt still didn't understand why Penny was so down on her show, they were proud of her and everybody in town knew that their daughter was now a TV star, the calls they received after the first show were unreal. However, the show seemed to be a sore point with their daughter and they knew not to talk about it around her, Leonard purposely having to make sure it didn't even come up around her. They didn't know why until 10 minutes into the latest episode they were watching that night. "Did I just hear that right, did they just say Penny is moving away?" Wyatt asked his wife.
Meryl was a little shocked at what she had seen on TV too, "Sweetie, her character is called 'Susan', but yes it seems that Susan is moving away." Meryl thought a couple seconds, "I bet that means Penny was off the show and I wonder if that is why Penny doesn't care about the show anymore."
Wyatt shook his head, "Why would she be off the show, I may be partial since she is my daughter, but she is the funniest person on the show and all the people we know say that too."
Meryl shrugged, "I don't know what to say, but it would make sense due to the way she is acting about it."
"It just doesn't seem right." Wyatt huffed.
"I know Sweetie, it seems everything was going wrong in her life then, I'm just glad Leonard was there for her, at least she got to keep the best part of her life." Meryl shuttered thinking what would have happened if after all that happened Leonard didn't love her daughter anymore.
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The next day Steve Cassidy, head of the network ratings department, was just learning that Susan was moving too and that the actress that played Susan, someone named Penny, was off the show. He had been looking at the comments the network had been getting on social media and had read the critics reports from the night before, none of it was very good. The critics had said the show's management must be 'nuts' for removing the character and that the show seemed to transition immediately to dull now. The fans weren't as nice on social media, using explicit remarks to let the network know they made what the fans thought was a huge mistake. Steve was a little pissed his department was not advised this was going to happen and was determined to complain about this decision as he gathered up his notes for the morning staff meeting, the overnight ratings always a big item the next day and today he had a lot to say.