"You wanted to see me, Konan?" Kisame asked, stepping into the woman's office. He received a message earlier in the day saying that Konan needed to see him as soon as he was free, and not much else. Clearly something was up, and it was something that Konan didn't want the public to hear about just yet.
The blue-haired woman looked up from her work, saw that it was Kisame standing in the door and nodded to him, motioning for him to take a seat at her desk. "I 'ave an assignment in two days, and wanted to take a few of your men wiz me."
"What is it?"
Konan answered by spreading a large map over her desk and pointing to a small forest north of them. "Zere is a group of VUM fighters staying in zis location. But zey 'ave been out of communication for a good week now! I was going to give zem a bit more time to get in touch; zings 'appen in ze field zat no one can predict in ze office…"
"But something made you change your mind," Kisame finished.
His suspicions were confirmed by a stern nod. "Yesterday was ze day all supply orders are to be sent to 'eadquarters," Konan explained. "To hide our numbers, we typically 'ave three or so outposts send in all ze orders. Zis particular station's order is supposed to go zrough me, but it never came. And considering ze last order was taken over six monzs ago, zey should be running out of everyzing but ze…'ow you say…kitchen sinks!"
"That doesn't sound good," Kisame acknowledged with a frown. "So what are we going to do?"
"A small group including myself and you, monsieur fishy, will go and investigate to see why in ze name of all your gods and mine zis outpost 'as been out of touch wiz ze rest of us!" Konan declared with a flourish of her hands. "Naturally, I want zis kept under ze table-"
"You mean under wraps?"
"Tables, wraps, ze meaning is understood," The VUM commander dismissively replied. "Ze point is, you get one rumor going in zis place zat anozer of our branches is under attack, and suddenly everyone is running around in a panic, saying we'll be next or zat zey need to go home and stay wiz zeir mommies and cry like little babies-"
"Right, right, no one that doesn't go on this assignment hears about it," Kisame agreed. Yeesh, once you got the woman going, it was hard to get her to stop.
"Good. If I may be so bold, I'd like monsieur Sasori to come along, seeing as it was 'is good eyes zat found us our only clue on ze last outing."
"Deidara will want to come along too, if Sasori goes," Kisame warned.
"I figured as much. Also, zat mosieur loudmouth is a tad more bearable if 'e comes along on zese assignments, so I'll also request 'im. Kakuzu will 'ave to come as well, and ze rest of ze spots shall be filled by my men, you, and moi."
"Konan, I need to know something before we go on this mission."
"Oui?"
"Is this…let's just suppose something went wrong at their camp. Not, 'oh, our wires got cut and we haven't fixed them yet' wrong, but an actual disaster with injuries. Are you going to change our expedition to a rescue mission?"
Konan sighed and stared glumly down at the map before her. "I don't know. Our camp is already over-burdened wiz your men, along with ze new recruits we took in before your arrival. If we were to try and bring any of zose members back, our supplies wouldn't 'old until ze next shipment, even if we rationed the tiniest portions possible."
"Let's hope there's no need to rescue anyone then," Kisame muttered.
-mm-
"Hey, Sasori?" a voice whispered in his ear.
"Yeah Hidan?" the Akasuna whispered back.
"We're just supposed to be checking on this camp's communication line, right?"
"That's what Konan said."
"Then why the hell are they taking so many of us? And why are we all armed, flying in a big-ass airship like this, with Konan and Kisame? Something's not right here-"
Hidan's inquiry was stopped by Kakuzu jabbing him in the ribs, and then ever so slightly jerking his head towards the other side of the cargo bay. Sasori immediately caught what the Falk was trying to point out; Kisame had seen them talking, and he didn't look too terribly happy. Immediately Sasori averted his gaze, briefly wondering if his commander was capable of reading lips and had seen what he and Hidan were discussing. "Ass," Hidan grumbled, glaring at Kakuzu. "I think you bruised my ribs."
"Sasori danna, he's right," Deidara whispered, noticing that Kisame had looked away and gone back to talking with Konan. "The details of this assignment seem off, un."
"It's probably just a precaution," Sasori insisted, though in truth he was just as unnerved as his counterparts. He could understand the need to send more than one person into the field at a time, but why not just take one of the base's helicopters? Why was it necessary to use this reinforced stealth plane and arm its passengers so thoroughly? Not to mention that the details given to them were lacking, at best.
The redhead wasn't given much longer to worry about his predicament, though; roughly five minutes later, the airship had touched down and the soldiers were preparing to disembark. Konan's men went first (if there were enemies nearby, Falks were much better at absorbing shots and punches than humans), and after clearing the area helped the others exit the ship and examine their surroundings.
It was amazing how a few hours of flight could completely warp the scenery. The trees around here were nowhere near as thick and lush as they'd been in the VUM's jungle base, and bore an eerie resemblance to the trees Sasori knew back on Earth. Furthermore, the air seemed much drier here; only later did Sasori realize that the humidity was normal in this area, and he'd simply grown used to stewing in the steamy weather of the jungle. Heck, the air smelled better here too; almost sweet, really. As he looked around, Sasori couldn't help but wonder what kinds of animals lived here; space squirrels, maybe? He'd yet to see anything on this planet besides Falks that had less than six legs…and it was then that a chilling realization hit Sasori.
He couldn't hear anything. No birds chirping, no lizards croaking or clicking, not even the sound of branches ruffling in the trees. It was dead silent. Sasori immediately regretted that particular choice of words. "Deidara-"
"You noticed it too, didn't you, un?" the blond whispered, not for fear of being overheard but rather because it seemed wrong for their voices to break such an oppressive silence.
The others soon picked up on what had set the blond and redhead on edge, the tension mounting in the group as a result. Konan, to her credit, did not let these unusual circumstances get to her, but rather moved to the front of the group and began marching in the direction of the VUM camp. "Let's make zis quick," she ordered, wincing at how her voice echoed through the air. "Please," she added in a quieter voice, "zere is somezing very not right 'ere."
The small band of fighters proceeded through the forest, listening desperately for any kind of sound, Falk or beast, but all was in vain. To add an extra layer of creepy to this chilling scenario, all the plants around them seemed to be in perfect health. Sasori felt like he'd walked onto the set of one of those slashes films he'd used to watch as a kid back on Earth, and now they were just waiting for the axe-murderer to pop out and slice them to bits. Unconsciously he moved closer to Deidara and Hidan, who likewise huddled near the Akasuna, adrenaline keeping two of them on high alert. Finally, they made it to the camp.
The first sign that something was amiss had come several minutes earlier, when they'd failed to encounter anyone on patrol. According to Konan, all VUM bases were to be guarded by strict patrols circling the base by a minimum range of half a mile, in order to ensure that the camps could be evacuated in the event of a sneak attack. However, Konan's group had been able to make it all the way to the gates of this settlement, and nary a peep had been heard from anywhere. "Kisame, you take your soldiers, I'll take mine," Konan ordered once they entered the base. "Spread out and see if you can find anyone."
"Maybe this is some kind of sick surprise party," Hidan muttered.
"Well I am not laughing. Quickly, go!"
Sasori, having previously stumbled upon important information merely by walking around and looking hard enough, agreed with Kisame's suggestion that they stick together and comb the buildings one by one. First place to check? The base's hangar.
"So what the hell are we looking for?" Hidan asked as Kisame forced the lock on the hangar's door.
"Anything that could explain why it feels like we've stepped into a horror movie," the shark growled as the metal lock finally gave way under him. "Seriously, I haven't gotten the creeps like this in a long time." Opening the door, he ushered the others inside, and soon the group was spread out seeking answers in every possible nook and cranny.
The search, unfortunately, yielded no immediate results for anyone. All the tools were stacked in toolboxes or hanging on the walls; none of the vehicles appeared to have been damaged; and both the power and phone lines in the office were fully functional. If anything had happened to the rebels here, it hadn't occurred while they were working on any ships or vehicles. "Damn, nothing," Hidan cursed, kicking an innocent hubcap in his frustration.
"Calm down," Sasori ordered, flipping through a discarded notebook lying on a workbench to see if it might hold any clues for them. "We just have to keep looking."
"We should've found something by now, un," Deidara murmured. "This isn't right, un."
"Speaking of not right, why does it smell so sweet in here?" Sasori pondered. "I would expect a hangar to smell like oil and grease, but it doesn't."
"No way, I thought that was just me smelling that," Hidan exclaimed. "I figured maybe it was some of that crappy new detergent we got in the last supply shipment, but it hasn't gone away since we landed."
Deidara was shooting both men a confused look. "What are you talking about, un?"
"What do you mean, what are we talking about?" Hidan demanded. "C'mon, don't tell me your super-advanced Falk senses or whatever can't smell this? It's like a beauty shop!"
"Sorry, un."
"Kakuzu, back me up on this!" But the scarred man just gave Hidan an equally confused look, indicating that whatever this mysterious scent was, he couldn't pick it up either. "Oh stop being such a…such a…ow…"
"Hidan?" Sasori asked, surprised at his friend's sudden shift.
Hidan seemed not to hear his name being called; instead, he clutched his head in his hands, moaning softly. He stumbled backwards, swaying in place as he doubled over. "What the…?"
"Hidan-" Sasori began to move towards his friend, when all of a sudden his vision went double. He stopped, blinking a few times to see if that helped any, but to no avail. He balance suddenly went out, sending him stumbling a few steps forward. Just like Hidan, he began to crumple in on himself. "What's going on?"
"Danna?"
"Dei…" Sasori swayed once and fell to the ground, with Hidan collapsing immediately afterwards. And then there was screaming, and someone picking him up and carrying him over a shoulder, and he was gone.
-mm-
Lights and colors swam before Sasori's vision. They warped and twisted into all manners of fantastic shapes and sizes, lurching forward and darting back, performing impossible feats with zero efforts, and no repeat performances. Sounds, maybe even words occasionally accompanied the performances, but the noise seemed far off, underwater, and in a different language, so Sasori paid it no mind. If he'd been conscious, he might've found the whole thing to be incredibly artistic. How long he stayed like this, the Akasuna couldn't say; but at last, he was ripped away from his dreams of magical colors and mystery sounds, and dumped back into the real world. His place of arrival? A pair of eyes slowly cracked open revealed it to be a bed in the medical tent, with Deidara sitting by his side. "Nnngh…"
That tiny, pathetic sound sent Deidara into a frenzy. First he looked to Sasori, to see if the Akasuna had indeed awoken; and after his suspicions had been confirmed, he ran out of the room yelling for a nurse in a rush of clicks and hisses that made Sasori's head threaten to split open. Kami, who had drilled a hole through his brain?
Deidara was back in a heartbeat, though, this time bearing a glass of water in his hands. "Danna, you need to sit up and drink this, un."
"Ah, my head…"
"Yeah, the doctor said you'd have a bad headache-oh! I'm being too loud, aren't I?"
"I think my heartbeat's too loud," Sasori groaned, gradually forcing himself into an upright position so he could accept the offered water.
"Sorry, un. It's just, after you collapsed-"
And suddenly the memory of the hangar burst forth in Sasori's mind, temporarily pushing aside his pity party long enough to worry about his fellow soldiers. "The mission! What happened to the others?"
"You and Hidan both collapsed around the same time, un," Deidara explained as quietly as he could, motioning for Sasori to drink the water. "Kakuzu grabbed you both and ran out of there; I got Kisame and told him what was going on, un. Good thing too; he was starting to look sick like you guys, un."
"But what happened to us?" Sasori pressed.
"We loaded everyone back on the ship as soon as Konan knew what happened, un. On the way back…you two almost stopped breathing, un." Sasori felt something knot in his stomach; to think he'd been that close to death. "Once we got back, Konan sent another team back to the camp, but with protective gear, un. The whole place was covered in…I think you call it neurotoxin. I killed anything that breathes it in for too long, and the scent's undetectable by Falks, un. In a sick way, we were lucky to have you and Hidan with us."
"Canaries in the coal mine," Sasori whispered as he finished his water.
"Un?"
"For a long time, humans would mine deep into the Earth for coal," Sasori explained, "and sometimes, they'd hit a pocket of deadly gas and not know it until it was too late. So they'd put little birds called canaries in cages and take them into the mine. If the canaries got sick or died, then that meant the area would be toxic to humans until they could clear the gas. So in a way, we were your canaries this time."
"You shouldn't smile when you say stuff like that, Sasori danna," Deidara chastised. "You almost died before I could repay you for saving me, un."
"Don't be so upset. If anything, I owe you for getting Hidan and I out of there."
"But you're the ones who detected the poison, so that breaks even, un," Deidara pouted.
Sasori shook his head and decided to change the subject. "That's why we couldn't find any Falks or animals, isn't it? They were all dead, weren't they?"
Deidara nodded, face expressionless. "Whoever attacked them did it at night. The second team found them in their bunks, sleeping. They'd been there for a week, and even without animals around, they'd still decayed, so…" Deidara didn't need to say anything more.
"How's Hidan?" Sasori inquired, eager to change the subject. Thinking about all those innocent people, killed in bed and left to rot made his stomach churn.
"He's fine, un. Woke up a while ago with a killer headache too, but Kakuzu's taking care of him." At this point, Deidara finally noticed that Sasori had finished his beverage. "I'll get you another glass of water, un."
"Thanks," the Akasuna muttered, watching the blonde exit the room. Looking down to his lap, the redhead began turning over this most recent tragedy in his head. There could only be one explanation behind the destruction of an entire Falk base; human biological warfare. But why had they attacked a rebel base? The rebels were working to stop both the humans and the Falks from fighting. It would've made more sense to test this on the battlefield. And that was another thing; most of the war's combat had occurred in space battles, where neurotoxin would be almost completely useless. So why manufacture the stuff in the first place, and then not even use it on the right enemies?
The redhead sighed and sank down into his bed. He'd need to talk with Konan and Kisame about this. But not until his head stopped pounding.