Moving in with Christina really was the best idea, and I should try and find a way to thank her again. I really enjoy my new job, even though it has its ups and downs. Uriah and Christina are great friends, and Christina has been begging me to meet Will, which I'm sure will happen sometime tomorrow. I'm making great money at Dauntless and I've even started talking to Caleb a little more. It's just a text message here and there, but I really missed talking to him. Four has turned out to be a really good friend. I really like being around him, hell, I'm pretty sure I'm even falling for him…..Damn it.
I wake up the next morning feeling fully refreshed. My stomach is already growling and I take a moment to thank 'past-Tris' for deciding to order some food to go from the diner last night. I can smell pancakes from the kitchen. Is Christina cooking right now? It actually wouldn't surprise me. She's so eager to have our girls day that she might have cooked breakfast to expedite the process. I get out of bed and rub the sleep out of my eyes.
"Good morning sweetheart." The voice I hear is not Christina's. I look up and see none other than Andrew Prior, my father, standing in my kitchen. I'm stuck where I stand. My heart is pounding out of my chest. My mother, Natalie, walks in behind me and kisses my forehead. I look across the room and see Caleb sprawled on a couch, watching TV in the living room. What is going on here?
Caleb looks up at me. "Well don't stand there like an idiot. If you're not going to eat something, let me have the rest." He jumps over the back of the couch and goes to grab the plate my father has made for me off the table. A few more seconds of processing hit before I turn and dig my shoulder into his torso. Caleb isn't about to get away with it that easily!
"Enough you two. Sit down already! Beatrice, do you want any coffee?" She asks with a perfect 'mom' voice.
"Yes, please. No cream or sugar." I love family breakfasts like this. We're always so busy with school and work that it's nice to have Sunday mornings to be lazy and drink coffee and watch the news. I hear a sniffling sound from across the table. It must be Caleb's allergies. I look up and see tears streaming down his face.
"Caleb…what's wrong? Got something in your eye?" I tease. He looks up at me in disgust. Beside me, I hear a cup hit the table. I go to take a sip, without looking, and instantly realize something is wrong.
Blood. I throw the cup on the ground by accident and stand up to get some water, anything to wash away the horrible taste. This is not right. Something is wrong. Mom and Dad are….
"SHIT." I sit up in my bed. MY bed. In MY apartment. With MY roommate, Christina. It was just a dream. Just a…I reach over and grab my phone. It's only 9:30, which is probably why Christina hasn't come in here and dragged me out of bed yet. I can feel the sweat dripping down my face. I see something on the ground by my bed, Four's jacket. I remember putting it back on before I feel asleep last night. I must have gotten hot or something and thrown it off last night. I get out of bed and wipe the sleep from my eyes for the second time. As I stand up, I pick the jacket up off the floor and put it on a hanger in my closet. Maybe I should stop by Dauntless sometime today and give it back.
I still feel nervous from my dream. It sits in the pit of my stomach. I wonder if Caleb has dreams like this? Before I can think about what I'm doing, I've already dialed his number and have the phone up to my ear, praying he answers. The phone picks up.
"Beatrice…what's wrong?" I woke him up. Of course I did, it's only 630 or 730 there.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I just…had this really terrible dream and I can't get it out of my head. Go back to sleep—"
"It's fine. I'm up now." I hear rustling on the other side of the line. He's probably sitting up in bed.
"Do you ever dream about Mom and Dad?" I need to get over this nasty habit of letting words spill out of my mouth. Caleb stays silent for a few moments. This probably isn't what he wanted to talk about first thing in the morning.
"Sometimes." He finally says. "Not as much anymore. Are you doing okay? You know, I took this Psyh 101 class and they talked about stress and sleep patterns…" He starts going on and on about how our body reacts to stress and for a minute, I just listen. In his own way, he's comforting me but putting the dream in a logical manner. It almost makes me giggle. Caleb has never been the best at cheering people up, but for now, just having my big brother try to make things better is perfect. It's his way of showing that he cares.
"Tris? Beatrice? Did you hear me? Are you still there?" Oops.
"Yeah! Caleb, I'm here. Sorry." I try and remember what he was talking about last.
"I said that I have fall break coming up. I could come visit you for a couple of days. You can even take time off of work if you want?" I hear my door open slowly and see Christina's face peer in, a big smile plastered on her face. I don't know if I'm ready to handle all the excitement that is girls day. She mouths something to me. It takes a couple of tries before I figure it out. Coffeeeeee. Perfect, that is exactly what I need!
"Tris, I think I'm losing you! Do you need to call me back?" Poor Caleb, I woke him up to basically ignore him.
"No, I heard you! Sounds like a perfect idea. Text me the dates and I'll try to ask it off work. I'm so sorry Caleb, I have to go. My annoying roommate has decided it's time for me to get out of bed!" I throw my pillow at the door, but she shuts it just in time.
"Alright, I've got to get up and get ready for class anyway. I'll text you those dates. Love you, Tris." He says the last part a little off-handedly. I think he feels obligated to say that he loves me, because Mom and Dad aren't around to do it anymore. It comes across as awkward as any big brother telling his little sister he loves them.
"Love you too Caleb. Have a good day." I hang up the phone and reach for another pillow to launch at Christina. She dodges it with perfect skill and comes and sits next to me on my bed.
"Sorry!" She says, even though I don't really think she means it. "I heard you talking and figured you'd be up. We have a long day today, you know! Will is going to meet us at noon for lunch, at Specific Gravity."
"Perfect, sounds good. Give me a few moments to get ready?" I ask, silently begging she let me do this alone. I love Christina, but I need every quiet moment I can get. She nods her head and shuts the door. I rummage through my closet to pick an outfit, but I can't get my dream out of my head. In the corner of the room, I hear my phone buzz. I pick it up to see a text from Caleb.
Caleb: Wednesday through Sunday of Thanksgiving? I didn't realize that Thanksgiving was this close. I check the calendar on my phone and see that it's only two weeks away.
Tris: Okay. Let me check with my roommate. I'm sure she won't mind you staying with us.
Christina will absolutely be okay with it. She loves any excuse to meet and entertain new people. I finish getting dressed and walk out into the kitchen.
"Hey, do you have any plans for thanksgiving?" I ask her.
"No, my parents are going on a Europe vacation, so it's just me. I was thinking of asking Will about his plans." She says.
"Would it be okay if my brother stayed with us for a few days?" The look of excitement on her face is all the answer that I need.
"That would be great! We can have a big Thanksgiving dinner too! This is great! We can watch football, eat a ton of food, play cards!" I'm glad she's taken to the idea so well.
She continues discussing our holiday plans all the way to the nail salon that she picked out as our first destination. She finally drops it when she sees me looking at the wall of paint colors.
"I think you should go for tips, but not white, maybe like a deep brown or black." She says.
"Do you know how quickly I would break those? With my luck, they'd end up in someone's food and then I'd get fired!" I finally give in. Christina keeps telling me that she thinks I'm pretty, but I'm not convinced. But when they're done, I'm pleased with my nails. They make my fingers feel longer, more graceful. By this time, we go to meet Will for lunch. Specific Gravity has great pizza, so I'm pretty excited. When we get there, Christina stands on her tip toes to give him a kiss. I feel a slight pain in my chest.
"Will, this is my best friend and new roommate, Tris. Tris, this is Will." He extends his hand in an awkward hand shake. I return the gesture and say hello before we go in. Will isn't exactly how I imagined him. He is pretty tall, maybe 6' 3", with dark brown messy hair. He wears glasses and has a lanky feel to him. If you had told me this was Christina's boyfriend, I probably would have laughed. But seeing the way they act around each other, how they move together, I guess it only makes sense.
"So! We have some exciting news!" Christina starts. "We are having a big Thanksgiving. I'd love for you to be there Will. Tris' brother is coming into town and we're going to have a huge dinner." She doesn't even try to contain her excitement.
"That sounds wonderful." He says with a shy smile. "Will it just be the four of us?" When he says the number, Christina instantly perks up even more. I didn't think it was possible.
"Four! You should invite him!" Great, not this again.
"Wait" Will interjects. "Four is a person?"
"It's just his nickname." I explain. "And I'm sure he has bigger plans with his family or something." Even I know that's a lie. "Besides, I don't really think he'd want to come anyway."
Christina laughs when I say this. "He walks you home from work every night and you talk about him all the time. I'm sure he wants to come."
"He walks me home because he says it's not safe, and it's not like I have much else to talk about. Except for the people I work with I know you and now, Will." I counter.
"For someone who doesn't seem interested, you sure are defending yourself pretty hard. That generally means you're trying to deny a truth to yourself as well." Will says. I shoot him a hard look that I hold for a while. I barely even know the guy and he can already tell I have feelings for Four. I give up and rest my head on the table.
"And there it is." Christina finally says. "Hey, it's nothing to be embarrassed about. I think it's great. Oh my gosh, you should totally ask him out. It would be all Sadie Hawkins." At this point, I really want the conversation to end. I reach into my pocket like it has the key to my escape. My hands curl on a piece of paper. It takes me a minute to figure out what it is.
"I already have a date, with someone else." I blurt. I must have accidently grabbed my work jeans. The piece of paper is from Al, with his phone number on it.
Christina's face drops a little in disappointment. "Oh, who with?"
"A guy I met at work. He's in town visiting family and we got to talking the other day. He's really nice." It's not a lie. I enjoyed talking to him and I'm sure we'll have a good time. Will it be exactly what I want? Maybe, but probably not.
"Well, that's sounds nice." She says. Christina is a terrible liar, she always has been.
Our food arrives and we talk a little more about life. Will asks me about why I moved to the city and decided to live in Chicago. I gave him the same answers I give everyone. Christina keeps quiet, knowing I don't really like to talk about myself. It seems selfish to hog a conversation. I ask Will about what he does for a living. He tells me that he's an economist for a big company. He starts explaining things to me about numbers and sales projections. I can't help but laugh. He sounds exactly like Caleb and I know without a doubt that they will get along over the holiday.
"Will, I love you, but I think it's time Tris and I head out. We still have a long day ahead of us!" She exclaims, much to my dismay.
"Right, I'm sure Tris is very excited." He says sarcastically.
"Oh believe me. I am." I say, mirroring his tone. We pay the bill and get up to leave. Christina is already ahead of us and about to walk out the door.
"Tris." Will says to me. "I know we just met and maybe it's none of my business, but there's no point in denying yourself happiness. I feel like…you're almost there. The only person you have left to convince is yourself." I'm a little stunned. Will is a lot like Christina, perceptive in ways I wouldn't have imagined. "But like I said," he continues. "Maybe it's none of my business."
"Thank you." I don't really know what else to say. We leave Specific Gravity and the rest of the day is fairly uneventful. Christina asks about Al a couple of times. Her questions remind me to text him.
Tris: Hey, are you busy tomorrow night? I was thinking we could get dinner or something. He responds almost immediately.
Al: Sure! What time? We hammer out the rest of the details. It's incredibly selfish of me to use him to get Christina off of my back, but I'm just not in the mood to deal with all her questions about Four right now.
When I get home, I'm totally exhausted. I eat dinner before letting Christina know that I'm turning in for the night. In my room, I see Four's jacket hanging up in my closet. I meant to run past Dauntless to give it to him, but totally forgot in the commotion of the day. I reach over and grab my phone. Staff phone numbers are all online, so I find Four's and send him a quick text.
Tris: Hey, it's Tris. I just wanted to let you know that I didn't mean to hold your jacket hostage and I can drop it off at work tomorrow if you want! I don't particularly like going into work on my days off, but I did steal his jacket.
Four: It's okay. I'm only freezing to death over here, and don't worry about it. I have tomorrow night off. Just bring it on Saturday?
Tris: Will do! See you then.
I'm starting to doze off with my phone in my hand. I set it down on the night stand and look my eyes are drawn to the picture of Mom and Dad. They would be happy to know that Caleb and I are making an effort to see each other over Thanksgiving. The only thing that would make it perfect would be if they were there too. I think about my dream from last night again. I almost wish I could have it again, just to see their faces so vividly. It almost makes the horrible ending worth it. Almost.
A.N. Thank you every one for reading! As always, please leave reviews and feedback so I can know how you feel/if you have questions/you want to tell me what music you're listening to right now/you want to tell me what show you're binging on Netflix (Mad Men for me!) -dauntlessbybirth