A/N: I acted a plumb ass fool with the last chapter shouts out to monni2215 lol she did not see it coming I was waiting for her review for a minute and reading it she did NOT disappoint me with her reaction. She knows why and now I shall ask for a refund for my bus ticket to Titty-Ho or Climax. Yes, I will put you in my story you never know which one of y'all might pop up in a chapter. This is how I roll my imagination and creativity is all OVER the place as you can tell. Anyway TJ's birthday chapter here! Let's go folks!
Happy Reading! (:
TJ's POV
My birthday party is awesome! Benny is here! I got the bouncy house, popcorn machine, snow cones, skeeball, face-painting, inflatable basketball, bowlercade, inflatable bumper cars, a Ferris wheel, cotton candy, Velcro fly, frog hopper, fun slide, Big Trucks, Giant Swings, funnel cake. It's so much stuff I can't name it all! "Where is the birthday boy?"
"Here I am. Can I ride with Benny?"
"Yep got to take off your birthday crown."
"Here mommy hold this." I handed her my birthday boy crown and Benny mask. "I'm ready. Is it a boy or a girl?"
"It's a boy his name is Jellybean."
"Hi Jellybean I'm TJ the birthday boy this is Benny."
Benny rubbed his face. "Soft! That's right Benny."
"Benny this is pony is for you her name is Polly Esther. Let's get you up here. Take you both for a spin."
"Awesome."
"TJ look over here." Daddy said snapping the picture. "Got it go ahead. Artie are you filming this?"
"I am."
"Aww this is cool! You are a cutie Jellybean. Daddy can I have my own pony?!"
"No TJ you're already getting a dog! No Benny!" Benny tossed his hand at daddy. Benny and I rode around a couple times and then he went dashing off harassing the party goers.
"Hahaha! Benny is messing with Uncle Puck. He's rubbing his Mohawk!" Uncle Puck ran off Benny was right behind him. "Oooh face paint! Ian what you getting your face painted as?"
"I don't know I'm torn between Spiderman or a pirate. What about you?"
"I'm getting my face painted as Simba, daddy can be Mufasa and mommy can be Sarabi we can be the family of Pride Rock but we're going to call it Evans Pride Rock."
"Uncle Stevie got his face painted as Mario!"
Uncle Steve hid behind grandma's chair popping up frightening her. "Steven! You are going to get it!"
"RUN UNCLE STEVIE! RUN! He's gone!"
"Uncle Artie is Luigi!'
"This is an awesome party TJ."
"Thanks Ian. I can't wait to see my presents and cake!" It was a massive pile of presents wrapped in colorful wrapping paper. "Prince TJ in full effect!"
"Yup, look TJ Benny is messing with Aunt Cedes! He's trying to steal her away from Uncle Sam."
"Daddy doesn't like that mommy is his girl! Benny the Bull gonna get put on granny. Watch."
Sam's POV
Benny the Bull the fuzzy one, the red one, this guy is trying to take my wife! He's blowing her kisses, kissing her, pushing me back. This bull must be stopped.
"Benny I know what you do, Mr. Still Your Girl but she's mine, you can steal my mother in law my father in law won't mind. She's over there." I pointed him in her direction. "Yup right there."
"That Bull was getting fresh he's a cutie though he kept twirling his tail and brushing his face."
I looked Cedes up and down pointed to the 8k rock on her hand. "Hey! Don't you get any ideas thinking about running off with the fuzzy one? I didn't drop all of this for you to go with the fuzzball." She playfully hit me in the stomach. "Look he got your mom he just placed a good one on her."
"Benny I know you a mascot and all but you sir are doing me a favor she's all yours."
"Joshua! Joshua!" Benny picked her up running away.
"Sam, you are a good guy getting that Bull guy here Whew! She's out my hair either by the end of the party Benny is going to be tired of her or she's going to be tired of him. I'm going over here to try my hands at winning TJ a goldfish." He wheeled himself over to Ping Pong Ball.
"Daddy you see my face! Rawr! Who am I?"
"Hmm… let me take a wild guess! Are you Scar?"
"Daddy?! Who wants to be ugly Scar! I'm the cute one! Mommy you know who I am."
"Are you Simba?!"
"Bingo Bango Buttafuoco! Daddy you have to pay more attention to the movie! Mommy is you going to get your face painted?"
"Yeah, what should mommy get her face painted as?"
"Simba's mommy Sarabi and Daddy can be Mufasa he already has the mustache!"
"What do you think baby? Shall we."
"Yeah let's do it."
"Oh my Gosh! It licked my hand!" We turned around looking at the petting zoo Kurt adjust his outfit.
"Kurt it's a petting zoo that's what they do."
"No, no, not my neckerchief Blaine these animals are messing up outfit. You can stay in there and get all smelling. Uh, I'll watch from a distance."
"That's really Benny! He-He's here!" JJ was standing there shocked. "He's here! Benjamin the Bull!"
"Wow JJ you are mascot-shocked more than TJ. Go over there and say hi to Benny, JJ he won't bite probably just touch you in the face. Makes you wonder where that tail of his has been. Uh he's twirling in front of Quinn. Get it Quinn!"
"Okay. I'm going over."
"I got to see this before I got my face painted."
"Um…B-Benny I'm…" Benny rubbed JJ's mustached putting a Benny mask on him. "I get a mask too! This is awesome! Yo, Benny I'm wondering. Those half-court backwards shots what's your secret." Benny stared doing some hand motions. "Right, that's it the curve okay. Awesome. Think you can show the kiddies one before you leave." Benny gave the thumbs up. "Awesome! Cedes! I got a mask! Also Benny those LuvaBulls, hook a brother up."
"Mercedes let's go get our faces painted while JJ chops it up with the fuzzy one."
"So the LuvaBull I want is….."
Mercedes and I got our faces painted. "What do you think?" I checked out myself in the mirror. "I look good. You look fine Sarabi. How I look baby?"
"Sexy give the queen some sugar."
"Always." I pulled Mercedes in for a heated lip lock.
"Hey! Hey! We have kids around can y'all save that for behind locked doors." Stevie said. "Hey it's Mufasa and Sarabi. Cool. When are we going to get into the grub? I'm starvin' like Marvin."
"Soon, where is TJ?"
"He and his entourage of kids are at the bumper cars. This is awesome! I'm off to ride the Ferris Wheel! Hey JT and Simon follow me."
"Where is TJ?" JT asked.
"Somewhere booed up with his future girlfriend we'll link up with him after we hit up this ride."
"Bye mommy!"
"See-ya mommy!"
Mercedes POV
"And they're off! Mary you made it!" I pulled them both for a hug." Denise! Hey! Are you guys having fun?"
"A blast! You guys did it up! I feel like I'm at a junior Six Flags over Evans minus roller coasters. I don't like heights."
"I'm the same too girl. We're off to find the birthday boy well Prince care to join us?"
"Okay." We all chatted it up making our way over to the inflatable bumper cars. "Look at TJ and Gabby, we both dubbed them Tabby." Denise said.
"You too! So have me and Stacey. Sam, you got your camera?"
He checked his pocket then pulled up his strap. "No, I set it on the table."
"It's okay, your father got he's taking pictures."
"Hi mommy! Hi Daddy! I'm driving like Uncle Stevie! I GOT THE NEED FOR SPEED! HOLD ON BABY!"
"Baby? TJ you better not be calling Gabby no baby! You one too!"
"I'm sorry mommy! It's the tattoos!" He raised his arms. "Speed Demon! Watch-out where you're going Logan before I run you off the road."
"Baby?! What? TJ is too much with his cute self! Hi TJ."
"Hi Ms. Mary and Ms. Denise." TJ jumped out the car running over giving both of them a hug. "Where is Simon and JT?!"
"Somewhere with your Uncle Stevie."
"Okay. I'm going to go find them. Bye! Come on guys! JT and Simon are here!"
"And he's off again! Mercedes when are you due and what do you want a boy or a girl?"
"We're due sometime next year in May, I want a girl, Sam is on the see-saw one minute is a girl next is a boy. What is it today baby?"
"A boy but a girl would be good. Oooh what if we have twins but…" He snapped his fingers. "We already had the ultrasound it was only one in there. Darn it! Could have had a twofer."
"I say a girl, boys are just them and that little wee-wee always aiming to pee on someone, JT got me many of times. Did Simon ever get you Mary?"
"A few, what about you Mercedes?"
"Never, now that donor of his always got peed on like TJ knew he didn't care for him. Did y'all by chance watch his interview?"
"Girl." They both rolled their eyes. "Did we…I was over it as soon as Juju said don't believe the hype. What about you guys?"
"We watched some of it then we went for a ride to clear our heads. Um Mary there is a fuzzy bull behind you."
"What?" She turned around and so did Benny raising his hands. "At least it's not a bug, Benny is fine with his cute self."
Benny brushed his face laying a good one her. "Get it Mary!" Benny fainted. "He is a fool!"
TJ's POV
"That was fun! Benny just fainted from kissing your mommy Simon, he has lip locked himself with a bunch of the ladies here today. He's getting it in. So, what y'all think of my party so far?" I took a bite of my mini funnel cake.
"It is awesome! You got everything, games popcorn." He tossed up a handful opening all of us opened our mouths. "Missed it. Benny. Bumper cars! What else?"
"I don't even know. I do know that I'm about to go around and see what my family is up to. I heard grandpa and granddaddy are trying to win me a goldfish and they got granny on the swings! I got swings! The twirly one and I saw a roller coaster!
"Roller coaster?!"
I nodded my head. "Yup! I'll link back up with you in a minute but go tell that guy that you're in TJ's coloring book and you can cut the line."
"Let's go man!"
I walked to the Ping Pong Ball Grandpa and Granddaddy were had a bunch of balls between them. "Granddaddy and Grandpa did one of you win me goldfish yet?!"
"No, not yet we're still trying. Where's granny and grandma?"
"Last time I saw her she and grandma Uncle Stevie and Uncle JJ had them in Velcro suits. Keep trying win me a fish I'm going off to find PawPaw." I darted through the crowd. "Benny have you seen PawPaw old guy with the stick?" He pointed to the putting green. "GOLF! You went for a few swings Benny?" He swung his club tossing it behind him pointing for Todd to get it. Then he pulled out his silly string spraying people. "PawPaw are you enjoying my party?!"
"I am this one of the best kids party I've ever been too you got that red fuzzy looking creature thing running around here falling over, tossing popcorn at people, kissing the ladies, he's funny."
"Yup, you got your face painted! As an Angry Bird that's cool PawPaw you want to go for a ride on the Ferris wheel with me?"
"You want to ride go for a ride with me? Not your Uncle Stevie or Uncle JJ?"
"I can do that later I want to go with PawPaw and after that we can go to the petting zoo spend some time with the animals."
"Okay. What animals they got over there?"
"A little bit of everything minus snakes mommy didn't want them and I guess she figured Ms. Mary wasn't going to go over there. You know she's afraid of bugs Simon told me even a teeny tiny worm. I'm going to see if I can get her to hold one to see if it's true."
"There is the birthday boy! Prince TJ, who is this strapping young man?" This lady trying to put the moves on PawPaw she better watch out he'll jump her in a minute after Aunt Tana of course.
"Look at you getting all sweet you young thing trying to get with this Nubian King." PawPaw tipped his party hat.
"This is my PawPaw we're riding together."
"That's sweet, Prince TJ and Nubian King here you go."
"Thank you." PawPaw pulled down his glasses. "She got a rump on her. Yeah imma have to choke that monkey later."
"PawPaw what's choke the monkey?" I asked he put his hand in his pocket rubbing something.
"Nothing...there go your mommy. Wave."
I waved. "MOMMY! YOU LOOK PRETTY AS SARABI!"
"THANK YOU BABY! TJ AFTER YOU GET OFF THIS RIDE WE'RE EATING!"
"PAWPAW AND I WAS GOING TO GO THE PETTING ZOO AFTER THIS!"
"AFTER THE PETTING ZOO THEN WE'RE EATING!"
"COOL! You can see everything up here! Benny done ran away with granny purse. "RUN BENNY! RUN!" We went around a few times then I made a mad dash to the petting zoo which was good because. Ms. Mary was there with Simon. "PawPaw there she going over there."
"This is a ferret! They are sneaky they like taking people keys and hiding them. Mommy can I get a ferret too? Please." Simon asked.
"I don't know. I can't keep a plant alive. I don't think I hate them... I mean they eat snakes so they have some points on their side!"
"Yeah, because you keep watering your plant. Daddy told you not to. Come on. Get me a ferret. I can take care of it!"
"Simon, your mother only grew up with fish so... Sure why not! It's a hunter so I wouldn't have to worry about taking care of it! Get daddy to do it, but before that you're going to have to read up on it."
"Awesome! TJ you heard the good news I'm getting a ferret!"
"Yup, mommy can I…."
She put up her hand. "TJ, you asked for the pony and you are not about to ask me for a ferret, I'm surprised you haven't' asked to keep Benny the Bull."
"That was going to be my next question but he's booked. Ooh a bunny! Hi cutie you're soft! What is his name?"
"His name is Mr. Biggs."
I picked him up making kissy faces. "Mr. Biggs, from Isley Brothers?"
"What you know about the Isley Brothers, young scout?" Lucky asked me.
"Tank is contagious touch him Sarah give her what you got…."
"Yeah, you know a little something about him." He laughed. "Tank is contagious touch him Sarah...this kid is hilarious!"
"Mommy, I'm hungry. Can I get a rabbit?"
She put her hand on her hip. "No come on, let's wipe your hands off so we can eat." I kissed the Bunny setting him down.
"He was a heavy one still cute. Mommy wait hold up, Ms. Mary for 1 million dollars would you hold this." I pulled a slimy dirty worm out my pocket Simon held out his hand I dropped it in his. "Would you Aunt Mary?"
"Probably not I would live a life of poverty and be happy as fuck." I gasped. "None of y'all better not repeat that come on Simon."
"I'm right behind you." Simon whispered in my ear. "See I told you it was true TJ, she don't like bugs you think my dad phone is number one no, it's the Orkin-Man on speed dial they know her very well they are on a first name basis, they stop by every so often for a bug check it's insane. This one time I caught a Tankette on my wall and she flipped when I sprung on her. I got smacked then I had to wash my hands a bunch of times."
"What about ants?"
"Ants are tiny she can take care of them."
"Simon, come on baby boy!"
"Right behind you!" He yelled.
"Ms. Mary dropped the F-bomb! I can't WAIT to move to San Diego Children's Church will be all the way live! It's all the way live!"
"TJ, stop dancing, okay let's go get some grub, all the kids sit at the table, Sam are you fixing TJ's plate?"
"No, I think my mother got that. Yeah she got him, you sit down baby I'll fix your plate."
"Okay."
Mercedes POV
This party is all the way live! That's how I can explain it the rides, the carnival food, the fresh ass mascot, the petting zoo! Makes we want to be a kid again.
"Cedes this is a wonderful party you and Sam went all out for TJ!" Quinn said.
"Daddy wanted his son to have a party and here it is I'm happy he's happy, making friends with the other kids, this is so nice. Thank you baby."
"You're welcome." He set my plate down.
"PawPaw what you want on your plate?"
"You got some ribs."
"That I do, did them just for you."
"Good, good, I'll take whole plate of ribs." PawPaw unbuttoned his pants. "Getting ready to smash. I need room." He patted his stomach.
"Dad, come on you need a vegetable."
"Fine, Fries or an Idaho potato."
"No worries Pops, I'll put some veggies on his plate. Mom, you want something?"
"I'll get it myself, Sam you are doing enough."
"I just want to make sure my son is having a good time." I heard TJ laughing. "And he is I'll be right back."
"Mercedes, what's all them bags over there?"
"Oh, for every kid who is here for TJ's Birthday Bash will all be leaving with gaming consoles of PS4 and some games, extra controller and gift cards. My husband spent a pretty penny on all of this."
"PS4, this is all new to me. I'm sure Simon knows how to hook that up. I'm a novice."
"So am I." Rachel chimed in. "I..."
"What kind of dick is that?" Everyone at the table started coughing.
"Who talking about dicks?!"
"Well there are two kinds of dicks since someone did mention it there is egg rolls and mushrooms. After that it's just meh. There's a long one. There's a thick one, yawn." Mary said. "My husband he has..."
"Ok..."
"What other kind of dicks are there?" Brittany asked.
"Why are we talking about dicks? No wonder our kids know too much shit! Teabagging, organism what else..."
TJ's POV
"Hey y'all do this." I stood on my chair blowing bubbles in my drink and they copied. "Yup! Uncle Stevie come eat with the kids! We're having fun over here! Blowing bubbles in our juice!"
"I got to go over there. Hello I'm TJ's favorite uncle Uncle Stevie, how many of you play video games?" Most of the hand went up. "A lot of you play games, what is your favorite game?"
"I like Mario Kart Wii." Simon said.
"I do too. You?"
"GTA IV."
"Have you beaten it?" JT asked.
"No, not yet, I'm trying to do it without cheats."
"Well, I beat GTA V in a week without cheats."
"WHAT?! No, way! A week?"
"Yup, 1 week I had nothing else better to do."
"TJ you're Uncle Stevie is the best! Maybe we can play games later on."
"Can't play games today but we're all moving down to San Diego maybe we can have game night but the best gamer here is TJ, my mini-gamer VP, 'cause I'm the president. So, what systems y'all got?"
"I got…."
"I got…"
"I got an Atari." All the kids at the table talking at the same time about their consoles! Man! All these kids play games Uncle Stevie and I will never be at our house or him at his house. I wonder where he is going to live at once we move to San Diego.
Sam's POV
Stevie is in his zone talking about video games. "Yeah, Stevie would end up at the kiddie table."
"He blends right in. TJ is going to be tired tonight."
"I don't think he will be tired, he has had 2 mini cotton candies, a funnel cake and he has birthday cake coming up later, this child will be jumping off the walls and speaking of birthday cake it's time for that." Mercedes patted my knee. "Come on baby."
Artie's POV
Gonna get TJ's aunts, uncles, cousins and friends to all wish happy birthday and give him a few words of wisdom. "Okay Quinn you're on, what do you have to say to the birthday boy?"
"First and foremost Happy Birthday Cookies! I love you and I hope you're having fun, if you need anything come over to my house I'll be right across the street in San Diego I have a lot more funny pictures to show you of your aunts, uncles and your parents." Benny came squeezing Quinn's butt. "Benny!"
"Gabby what do you have to say to the birthday boy."
"Feliz Cumpleaños Thaddeus, hope you like what I got you, this will help you the next time we play house. I love you!"
"Puck, what do you have to say to TJ."
"TJ, Uncle Puck here I love you and if anyone tries to get in your way stomp them and if that doesn't work, give me call I'll be right there with my piece. Peace out!"
"Mercedes what do you have to say to your son?"
"TJ, you are mommy's pride and joy I'm so happy that God gave me you he knew just what I needed and that is you, you bring a smile to my face every day. I love you and I wish you many more fun memories and happy birthday. I got to run Benny the Bull is trying to light the candles on the cake. Benny!" I turned the camcorder Benny dropped the matches running away, out popped Santana picking them up.
"Artie don't film that!" I rolled away laughing.
"Sam, what do you have to say your son?"
"TJ, daddy here just I'm so happy I'm your daddy! God pick the right man for the job I'm happy you're enjoying your party and can't wait to open the presents with you to see what items you scored in on. If I could do this every day to see the smile on your face I would, you are the reason I go out and work hard. Daddy loves you son. Benny stop flirting with my wife."
"PawPaw, what you go to say to your great grandson."
"Happy Birthday TJ PawPaw's little esquire! You are just like me and I love it, remember to keep God first and have fun, stay a child play until you drop! Love you! Santana! Come here girl."
"Where are the rest of his aunts? Rachel! Stacey! Brittany! Santana! Come say your birthday greeting!"
Pucks POV
"Yo! This kids party is hype I've never seen so many kids and games in once setting this is like junior kiddie six flags. "Is that a roller coaster?" Lucky asked.
"Yeah, that's the The Dragon Wagon it's a long line for that. I'm gonna hit up the swings next. You should see the kids screaming going over those mini dips and mini turns it's hilarious. So, what are we going to do about Tank?"
"Look, it's TJ's birthday party I'm not going to talk about him right now I'm too busy having fun. Hey Benny! Why didn't you bring none of those LuvaBulls. What you mean they're all for you? Alright Janet?" Benny busted out the moonwalk. "Excuse me Michael, okay. That's okay I'll hit up his assistant. Todd, let me talk to you right quick."
Mercedes POV
Now came time for the main event! The CAKE AND ICE CREAM. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR TJ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HOW OLD ARE YOU NOW? HOW OLD ARE YOU NOW? HOW OLD ARE YOU NOW? HOW OLD ARE YOU NOW?" Sam, lit the 5 little candles.
TJ cleared his throat. "I'm 5 years old now, I'm 5 years old now, I'm 5 years old now, I'm 5 years old now."
"May the Good Lord Bless you, may the Good Lord Bless you, May the Good Lord Bless you, May the Good Lord bless you, I hope you many more years, I hope you many more years, I hope you many more years, I hope you many more years!"
"….I wish me many more years!" He did a Mercedes Jones run. "YEAH!" Everyone shouted clapping their hands.
"First make a wish then blow out your candles."
He shut his eyes thinking of the perfect wish. "Got it!" He blew out my candles. "Hey! Trick candles!"
"Who put trick candles on TJ's cake?" I heard uncle Stevie laughing. "Stevie why would you do that?"
"How you know it was me?"
"You always playing jokes and you're the only one laughing! When your birthday comes around payback! Right TJ?"
"Yup." Grandma pulled out her new stick waving it at him.
"Birthday boy what did you wish for?" I asked TJ giving him a bunch of kisses.
"Mommy, Mommy, I'm a big boy now." I kissed him again. "I can't say or it won't come true! I just want to thank you and daddy for this awesome party and I can't wait to slice this cake. Where is the knife?!" He clapped his hands rubbing them together.
"Sam, cut the cake but before you do, get a picture of this." TJ's birthday cake is a full sheet with his picture on top.
"LET US HAVE CAKE!" TJ shouted all the kids and Uncle Stevie erupted in thunderous applause. "I get the big slice! I want to eat my picture!"
Monday...
Jenny's POV
"Cuzzo that lady who was doing the wobble in the parking lot at Target hit me up via email and I'll share with all of you what she had to say after Jenny here catch these Z's next on The KiJay Smith Show."
A/N: Do y'all want more of TJ's birthday with the opening of gifts? Let me know! Tank and his ass will return tomorrow we have to discuss how we want to go about this. On the East Coast until a few hours iamJLS Central on down until tomorrow iamJLS