Chapter Eight: Autograph (Part Two)
While protecting Adrien from Jackady, Ladybug notices a signed Jagged Stone CD on his desk; but the autograph isn't made out to Adrien...
Marinette made a show of yawning widely, stretching her arms above her heard. "I didn't know I was so tired," she mumbled, rubbing non-existent sleep from her eyes.
Her parents looked round from the TV as she came in. Tom tried to look stern, but Sabine giggled at the sight of her daughter's mussed-up pigtails. "We meant for you to stay in so you could catch up on your schoolwork, but catching up on some sleep is a good thing, too!"
Marinette slowly nodded, doing her best to appear drowsy. "I guess I really needed it."
"I'll say! I called you for dinner almost an hour ago, but you didn't even stir. When I peeked in, I was surprised to see you tucked up in bed so early!"
"Sorry, I must have slept really soundly." Marinette was very glad that her bed was atop a ladder, which her mother seldom bothered to climb - the sheets she had propped up must have looked convincing enough!
Sabine seemed to be blithely unaware that she had been deceived. "There's a plate of food for you in the kitchen, if you're hungry."
"Thanks, I'll take it up with me while I get on with my homework."
"Marinette," her father blurted, speaking up for the first time. "I'm proud of you for behaving in such a responsible way, but don't overdo it. If you're not feeling one-hundred percent, don't push yourself unnecessarily, make sure you get enough rest. Your school books will still be there in the morning."
Marinette smiled. She didn't resent her father for making her stay at home; she understood that he had only been so strict with her because he cared about her. After the akuma-battle she had just returned from, every family moment she had - even seemingly mundane exchanges like this - seemed so much more precious. "I know, Papa. I understand, and I'm sorry." She heaved a sigh, hoping it sounded rueful. "I guess I let my designs distract me from my schoolwork sometimes, though I know I shouldn't. I'll try to do better in class, and keep designing mostly for weekends."
She must have looked suitably contrite; Tom got up off the couch and enveloped her in a hug, affectionately ruffling her hair. "You're a good kid, really," he said, pretending that the praise was grudging. It was his half of a familiar routine. Taking her usual cue, Marinette stuck out her tongue at him; he tweaked one of her pigtails in response. "Once your homework is done, you should set some time aside to wipe the floor with me at Mecha Strike III."
She smiled brightly at his suggestion, then hastily sagged as she remembered she was supposed to be looking bleary. "Maybe not tonight. I'm still so tired, you'd probably beat me easy."
"You really think I want to miss an opportunity like that?"
Sabine chuckled, coming over to press a kiss to her daughter's forehead. "Don't let him take advantage of you, sweetie. The least he can do is let you keep your high scores until you're properly awake." Tom pulled a disappointed face behind her back, making Marinette chuckle.
"I'll be sure to properly defend my title tomorrow - after my homework is done. Good night, Maman! Good night, Papa!"
She kissed them both, took the plate from the kitchen countertop (stealthily adding to it on her way past the cookie-jar) and tramped back upstairs, her mind going much faster than her feet.
She didn't know how she'd managed to seem so convincingly tired. Despite the difficult akuma-battle earlier that afternoon, she was feeling wide-awake. She cringed at the memory of it; Ladybug certainly hadn't been at her best today. Almost straight away, she had managed to let Jackady disable her yoyo. If she hadn't already used her Lucky Charm, she would have been left defenceless against the akuma, and that would have doomed everyone else: the hypnotized citizens, the quacking tv-host, the gorilla-like chauffeur, Mr Agreste...
She scrubbed at her face with her free hand, suddenly feeling genuinely weary. The battle had been hard, in more ways than one. It had been the most difficult decision of her life, letting Mr Agreste head for the roof while they stayed back to face Jackady himself. She would never forget how Adrien-
... Adrien...
She still wasn't nearly used to thinking of him and Chat Noir as the same person. She would never forget the shell-shocked expression Chat had worn when he had seen his father flapping about the studio like a giant butterfly; nor the anguished shout he gave as Mr Agreste spread his arms and started to 'fly' towards the rooftop.
Though it must have been hard for him, he hadn't let it break him. The entire time she had been kneeling on the floor, frantically ripping up every card she could lay hands on, she had been looking on in awe at her partner, who - to her shame - she had so often disregarded as nothing more than a lackadaisical joker. There had been nothing at all humorous about him today; in fact, she had never seen him quite so finely-honed. If she hadn't known who was behind the mask and how personally invested he was in the fight, she probably would have wondered at his sudden ferocity. The way he had stepped directly into the path of those black cards and simply swatted them out of the air with a single swipe of his baton, while she stood gawking at him with a useless yoyo in her hand... that had been downright vicious. By the time they made it to the roof to check on Mr Agreste, her nerves had been almost completely frazzled; but he had calmly stepped forward, informing the disgruntled man that they had been his saviours, without betraying even a hint at the fact that he was Gabriel Agreste's own son. That was-
Marinette realized she had reached her room and was standing in the middle of it, gazing blankly at the opposite wall without realizing what she was doing. Tikki sat on the plate in her hand, munching cookies while watching her anxiously. The kwami swallowed hastily when she saw that she had her wielder's attention.
"Are you okay, Marinette?"
She was feeling far from okay, but... no, she had no right to complain, not even in complete privacy like this. This wasn't about her, it was about Chat... about Adrien...
"I'm fine," she said, crossing the room and setting the plate down on her desk. Though she was glad her kwami was replenishing her strength, she couldn't even think about eating at a time like this.
Tikki seemed slightly reassured. "Are you going to go see him?" she asked next.
"Yes," Marinette surprised herself by answering without hesitation. Not a few hours ago, the idea of going to visit Adrien would have had her in the throes of a nervous breakdown - before being grounded, she had spent weeks meticulously planning the outfit she would wear ahead of seeing him at Nino's TV appearance - but right now, she had absolutely no flutter of nerves on her own account. Only an overwhelming concern for him, for what he must be feeling, what he had been through. Afterwards, with his father standing on the roof behind them and both their Miraculous starting to beep, she had hastily told him that she would catch up with him later. Now was later, and she wanted to go see him as soon as possible.
The idea of him dealing with everything that had happened on his own made her heart ache. She silently berated herself for making them withhold their identities from each other for all this time. If they had known who the other was before today, all this could have been so much easier for him. She shuddered to think of how it would have been if she still didn't know and he was left all alone, with no one to confide in. She would personally make sure he wasn't alone in this, or in anything else, ever again.
She glanced down at Tikki. As soon as she did, she knew she didn't have to ask permission for what was ahead; the kwami had finished her cookies and was smiling reassuringly up at her.
"Ready when you are," she said, as confirmation.
Marinette smiled thankfully back at her. She didn't waste another second.
"Tikki, tranform me!"
When Ladybug got to the Agreste mansion, she took a circuitous route to the rooftop, carefully avoiding the cameras she now knew were there. She was glad she had always resisted the urge to spy on her crush; if she had been caught on surveillance peeking in through Adrien's windows, she would have been mortified! As it was, when she looked back at how she had treated him - both of him - in the past, she felt like a complete idiot!
She clung to a drainpipe on the side of the house, peering into his room as discreetly as she could. She wanted to respect his privacy; if he looked like he wouldn't want her to-
She spotted him, and her heart clenched painfully at the sight.
He was standing just inside the window, his phone in his hand. She couldn't see his face, but by the hunch of his shoulders - how well she knew those mannerisms by now, that slight tilt of his head was unmistakably Chat! - she could imagine the dejected expression he wore. She thought he was alone, until she noticed the black kwami hovering in the air beside him. She had only gotten a glimpse of it earlier, but had been too distracted at the time to give it much notice. From a distance, she could see that it was small and black, with pointed ears, feline green eyes, and a morose expression. She was thankful that it was there; even though it didn't appear to be giving its wielder an encouraging pep-talk, as Tikki often did for her, its silent presence seemed to be vaguely comforting. Its gaze was directed over Adrien's shoulder, at the screen of his phone-
Oh.
By leaning out at a precarious angle, she was able to see it: a photo of that same beautiful woman she had seen before on the monitor. Adrien scrolled his thumb across the screen, and the picture was replace by one of himself smiling at the camera; his mother stood behind him, her cheek resting against the top of his head, her arms clasped round him.
She was just making up her mind to leave, when he suddenly raised his head and turned away from the window. The black kwami shot beneath the collar of his shirt, whisking out of sight. Had someone come into the room? If so, she really should -
Before she could make a move, Gabriel Agreste came into view below. He walked briskly across the room, approached Adrien without checking his stride, paused for a moment in front of him - and then threw his arms around him.
Marinette couldn't imagine a single day gone by when her own father hadn't given her a hug; but from the way Adrien reacted, she guessed that this was a very rare occurrence, coming from Gabriel. He was utterly unprepared for it; he stood stock still, his shoulders tense, as if he were frozen in shock. It was so similar to how he reacted when she had hugged him earlier, she wondered when he had last been hugged by anyone before now.
Slowly, she watched as his posture softened. His arms went up to grip the back of his father's immaculately-tailored suit-jacket. This was unfortunate, as it placed his hand - the one that wore his Miraculous - directly in front of Gabriel's face.
The spell was broken. She saw Gabriel eye the silver ring critically, pulling out of the embrace to give his son a questioning look. She held her breath - had Chat Noir been discovered? She doubted that his father knew about his alter-ego - if she was afraid of her parents finding out, Adrien must be doubly so! She saw his attitude turn defensive as he crossed his arms, subtly drawing his hand out of view. Whatever it was he said in reply, it seemed to deflect Gabriel's attention. After saying a few more words, the man turned on his heel and left the room just as abruptly as he had entered it.
She knew he was gone when Adrien's kwami reappeared. It glanced dolefully in the direction of the door, turned slowly in midair - and looked straight at her. Moments later, a second pair of green eyes was staring up at her.
She froze where she was, not sure of what to do. Should she just leave? The scene she had just witnessed between father and son had been intensely personal; she felt bad for intruding where it wasn't her place. All kinds of boundaries had been crossed today, and she didn't want to blunder over another one. He probably didn't want her there; he would likely need some time alone to-
He rapidly crossed to the window, opened it, and stood back a few steps.
Uh, okay, that looked like an invitation. Hesitating only a moment longer, she slipped over the edge of the roof, caught the guttering with her yoyo, and swung herself inside, landing a few feet shy of him. Straightening from a crouch, she hesitantly looked up at him. He appeared to meet her gaze with just as much effort. Despite how worried she was about him, she fervently wished she hadn't come; this was far too awkward to deal with just now, or perhaps ever.
"Hello," he finally said, looking very ill-at-ease. "Thank you, f-for coming back."
"N-n-not at all," she managed to stammer out. "Thank you, for h-having me."
He acknowledged her thanks with a bashful nod. She didn't remember ever having seen him this tentative before, in either guise. "This is Plagg - my kwami," he unnecessarily explained, gesturing at the tiny black cat that hovered in the air.
"H-hello, Plagg," she said, not knowing what else to say. Plagg nodded in reply, green eyes regarding her warily. It occurred to Marinette that though the tiny black kwami wasn't as demonstrative about it, he was just as protective of his wielder as Tikki was of her; the guarded expression on his face seemed to warn her not to hurt the boy any more than he already had been. Clutching what looked like a wedge of cheese between his paws, he gave her one last pointed look before drifting away to some remote corner of the large room, leaving them to talk between themselves.
Adrien stood in silence, staring at the floor. Ladybug did the same, her assuredness once again failing her. The atmosphere was strongly reminiscent of the earlier scene in the bathroom. She supposed they were both still reeling from that; she knew she was, and could well imagine he was too.
"Thank you for today," he said, once again breaking the silence first. "And... I'm sorry. I knew you didn't want to know who I was, but I told you anyway, against your will." To her dismay, she saw an anguished look pass over his face. "I was panicking when I told you, but that's still no excuse. I shouldn't have forced you to-"
"No," she firmly interrupted, "it's fine, Adrien. Chat Noir," she corrected, hastily remembering who she was, who she was talking to. He flinched slightly - at her use of which name, she couldn't tell. "I'm actually glad you did," she went on, truthfully. "Given the situation, it was the right choice to make. I was... uh, acting pretty unreasonably, refusing to listen to you, so it's partly my fault that you had to tell me. I should be the one apologizing to you."
He smiled at her - that same polite, tolerant smile she had seen him wear so often before. It was so characteristic of Adrien, but she had never imagined that Chat could smile like that... as if he didn't really mean it. "That's okay. It was all very confusing, and I wasn't doing a very good job of explaining it." He gave a dismissive shrug. "Still, I do have to apologize. You're probably... disappointed. That I'm me, I mean."
She couldn't form a coherent reply to such an astounding statement. When she didn't say anything, he continued with eyes downcast, speaking to the floor. "I know I would be disappointed, in your place. I don't know how much you know about me, but... my father is a designer, and I work for him, as a professional fashion model. That isn't meant to be a boast, by the way - quite the opposite."
His well-shaped lips twisted up in an ironic smile. "Impressive, you think? That I'm handsome enough to be famous for my looks? But looks don't count for much against an akuma - or in any other worthwhile situation, really. All I basically do is help my father sell some clothes. Otherwise, I'm pretty useless. You'd be embarrassed associate with me, if you knew how spineless I really am. I always do whatever I'm told; I go to school, only after having begged to be allowed to go, instead of being tutored at home; I trot back and forth between all the extra classes I'm required to do; then I go to photo shoots, wear what I'm told to wear, sit through styling and make-up, smile for the camera when I'm told to. I've gotten really good at smiling on demand - I've had plenty of practice at it!"
Reading disdain into her continued silence, he gave a bitter laugh. "I bet you never expected such a pitiful Chat Noir! I'm really ashamed that you found out... that I'm just me. I'm not really a Chat Noir who... who is worthy of you. A far more fitting Chat Noir would be someone athletic, capable, street-smart, altruistic. Instead, the thing I'm best known for is how I stand and pose. Lame, isn't it? Aside from being a so-called celebrity, I'm actually a very boring person. I never do anything interesting, anything that really matters. The only time I'm truly of use to anyone... is when I'm Chat Noir. And that's Plagg's doing, not me. The rest of the time... I'm just a boring-"
She couldn't hold back any longer. She had been biting her tongue for fear of saying something to upset him, but she just couldn't stand any more of this. She was so angry - at whoever it was, Gabriel probably, who had made him like this; at Adrien, for being so unfair on himself; at herself, for not realizing that both Adrien's magazine- worthy smile and Chat's goofy grin had always hidden so much from her.
"Are you really feeling sorry for yourself, for reasons like that?!" she demanded. Her sudden outburst took him by surprise; he actually rocked back on his heels, as if her words nearly knocked him over. "Do you really believe that? Tikki - my kwami - is always on at me for under-estimating myself, but you just-! How can you possibly not realize how amazing you are?!"
He stared at the ground again, shuffling his feet. "I wasn't trying to fish for compli-"
"Shut up!" She took a few steps towards him, jabbing an accusatory finger at him. He was so surprised, he couldn't even shrink away from her, standing rooted to the spot in wide-eyed amazement. "Now you listen to me, because even if you don't realize it yet, I do know what I'm talking about! You are an incredible person, and don't you dare try to say otherwise! You're smart, talented, kind, thoughtful, polite to a fault, courageous, stupidly selfless, absolutely gorgeous to boot - and though I may have criticized it in the past, your sense of humour really isn't that bad!"
She took a moment to gauge his reaction. He looked as shocked as she must have done when she had discovered his secret; his mouth was agape in a very un-photogenic manner. She took a deep breath and went on, in a tone that was slightly calmer, but still brooked no argument.
"I don't know what you expect of yourself. I don't know what you expect of me, to have set your standards so high. If you think you're lame, I'm beyond all hope." When he made some inarticulate sound of protest, she impatiently cut him off. "No, listen! I'm not sure what kind of Chat Noir you thought I would expect, but I know the kind of Chat Noir you are, and I couldn't ask for anything better. I-" She faltered for the first time, shamefully dropping her gaze. "I'm sorry for never telling you that. I honestly mean it. Finding out who you are behind the mask has nothing to do with it." She caught the look of scepticism in his face, instantly railing against it. "It doesn't. Sure, now I know who you are - Adrien Agreste, god's gift to fashion-minded women, Greek deity in facsimile; good-looking, rich future-husband material, admirable in so many ways that aren't important - and so many that are. Can you deny that you have saved all of Paris so many times over? Or that you've saved me quite a few times as well?"
When he didn't dare try to counter her claim, she gave him a smile, the softness of which completely countered how abrupt her manner had been. "Who hands out shock-blankets after an attack, checks that the victims are alright, updates the police while I'm busy dealing with the press? You may think I don't notice that you do all that, but I do. Who tells stupid jokes and makes me laugh - or at least, distracts me by making me cringe - whenever we're in a tight spot? Who has stupidly taken several hits for me, gone along with my dumb plans even when they don't work, had the guts to confront me when I've done something out of line?" She reached out, laying a hand on his arm. He gave a start, perhaps from the feel of her glove against his bare skin.
"I've told you before, Minou: I couldn't do this without you. I wouldn't be Ladybug without you. Remember when the police accused us of being amateurs, and I agreed with them because I hadn't cleansed Stoneheart, which created such a mess? If you hadn't said what you did back then, I would have been ready to give up. I couldn't have taken on Papillion himself, couldn't have fought all those other akuma, if I hadn't had you by my side from the very start. I have been pathetic at times, but you have always been wonderful. Miraculous, even."
He smiled weakly at her quip, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Thank you. I-it means a lot, hearing you say that. But, still... Chat is just one side of me. Adrien is-"
"Adrien is Chat," she insistently countered. Tikki had said something very like this to her, on more than one occasion; she tried to remember how her kwami had put it. "You are Chat Noir, Adrien. Everything that Chat Noir is has to come from somewhere, and it comes from you. Sure, you can't be Chat all the time - it would be exhausting for you if you were, and even more so for me-" he chuckled a bit at that "-but that doesn't mean you're any less amazing when you're just being Adrien."
"You don't know me as Adrien," he tried to argue. "If you did-"
"I wouldn't be so sure," she muttered under her breath. When he blinked in surprise, having only half-heard what she said, she hastily took a different tact. "You don't know what I'm like as a civilian, either. I'm just a normal girl - well, normal for me. Just like you're normal for you. Besides being a famous model and everything, you have your own ordinary life, and that's a good thing; you need that respite from all the city-saving you do, need to be a part of what it is that we protect. There are people you see every day, whose lives you make a difference to - and not just when you pull them out of a villain's way. Like that guy at the studio today, Nino; look how concerned he was when we were looking for you. He's a good friend of yours, isn't he? He wouldn't be, if he honestly thought you were 'useless' or 'boring' - and he seemed like a pretty good judge of character."
Which was true; if she had only listened to Adrien's explanation about the gum the first time round, like Nino had done, she would have made friends with him a lot sooner. And she still hadn't learned; today, she had again failed to listen to him. She felt terrible about how it had happened, how he had been forced to sacrifice his secret identity for his father's sake - all because she still wouldn't listen.
Now, she had to make amends for that. She folded her arms in order to hide the fact that her elbows were trembling. She really wanted to tell him, though the thought of him knowing nearly had her almost scared out of her mind. Still, it was only fair; he was her partner, he deserved to know, and she couldn't bear the thought of his reveal remaining one-sided like it was now. She took another deep breath, knowing what came next - it was now or never.
"I don't think you're useless or boring, either," she went on, managing to keep her voice level. "Sure, I may have spent less time with Adrien than I have with Chat, but I enjoyed what little time we've had together. Before all hell broke loose, when we were just chatt-ing-" she earned another chuckle with that "-I was having a lot of fun. If that's what Adrien Agreste is like, I don't find him at all lame or boring. I was listening to what you had to say, and I genuinely found it interesting. We have the same taste in music, remember? You were right when you said it was difficult to fight against my favourite rock-singer."
He smiled despite himself, looking almost shyly at her. "You were right as well: that ten-foot purple dragon really did make things more difficult."
"Of course I'm right - who do you think I am?" They shared a laugh, though the rhetoric question was meant all too seriously - in a few moments, he wouldn't wonder any more. Heart thudding painfully in her ears, she went on: "It's not just me and Nino, either; you must have a lot of other people around you, who see how great you really are. Like that other friend of yours, Marinette - the one you were telling me about. The one who designed Jagged Stone's latest album cover."
"The one you had me protect from Evilstrator?" he asked, with a shadow of his usual grin.
"Yeah, that one." He had done well when they talked earlier, pretending to think she had no idea who Marinette was when Adrien spoke of her! But she was about to do one better than him... "I bet she wouldn't consider you a friend if she thought you were boring or useless. And you don't think she's boring - do you?"
She couldn't quite keep her nerves out of her voice. She held her breath until Adrien vehemently shook his head. "Of course not," he said, as if the very idea was ridiculous. He had no idea what it had to do with anything...
"Good." Ladybug braced herself... and then dropped her transformation in a flash of pink light. "I'd be insulted if you thought I was."
She was vaguely aware of Tikki floating away from her, perhaps going over to join Plagg. She didn't notice; her gaze was riveted elsewhere. If Adrien had seemed shocked before, he now looked completely thunderstruck. She tried to look at something else - the carpet, his posters, her shoes, anything - but her eyes kept getting drawn back to him, looking for some other signs of reaction. For several long moments, they just stared at each other in complete silence.
"...Marinette...?" he finally breathed, in a voice that sounded faint with disbelief.
"Yes, i-it's me." She could barely manage to utter anything more round the lump in her throat, though she valiantly tried. "Sorry, p-perhaps I shouldn't h-"
He staggered forward and swooped on her so suddenly, she gave a muffled squeal that was quite unworthy of Ladybug. He didn't seem to notice; he was busy burying his face in the shoulder of her jacket, his arms encircling her almost tight enough to squeeze another squeak out of her.
"It's you," he said, against the fabric of her shirt. "It's you, it was always you, you were... my lady, y-you were..." He fell silent, simply holding her as if she might slip through his grasp at any moment. Recovering as best she could, she wrapped her arms around him as well.
"Yes, it was me all along. I'm sorry, I'm certainly not disappointed that it's you, b-but... if you're a bit disappointed it's me, I wouldn't blame y-"
He clutched her even more tightly, as if he meant to smother out her words by grasping her too tightly to let her speak. "Of course I'm not disappointed!" he hissed, sounding scandalized by the idea. "Of course I'm not! How could I be? It was you, it was always you...y-you are..." He abruptly stopped speaking, snuffling softly against her shirt. Her collar felt damp. He was trying to hide it, but his shoulders shook with suppressed sobs.
"T-thank you," he whispered brokenly, almost too low for her to hear. "Thank you, for t-today, and just... f-for everything. I j-just... y-you are..."
With tears in her own eyes, she reach up to gently stroke his hair. "It's okay," she said, murmuring every reassuring thing she could possibly think of. "It's okay now. I'm here. It's me, I'm with you, I've always been with you. I'm your Lady, and you're my Chaton. It's okay."
In case he still had any lingering doubts, she added: "I'm so glad that it's you, Adrien - that you're my Chat Noir."
Once they had both managed to calm down a bit, they sat on the couch together.
Adrien sank shakily onto the cushions, apologizing for not having offered her a seat sooner. His insistence on manners at a time like this was more than a bit ridiculous, and they both knew it; but neither of them was in a fit state to point it out.
"I've made a fool of myself," he muttered with an embarrassed chuckle, running a swift hand over his face. His hair, tousled where his fingers ran through it (or perhaps where she had stroked it earlier) looked so much like Chat's, the resemblance was blindingly obvious.
Marinette used the edge of her sleeve to dab at eyes that he had so often seen before, framed by a red-spotted mask. "No you haven't," she firmly told him. "It's been a difficult day for you. You've been handling it all so well, Adrien."
He looked carefully at her, blinked rapidly several times, and then slowly smiled. "So, it was you all this time."
She didn't know what to say to that; there was little that could be said for how oblivious they had both been around each other. He went on, tapping his chin as he spoke, as if he was only just figuring something out. "So that's why you sent me to watch over Mari- uh, over you when Evilstrator was after you! And that's how you got into the school when Horrificator attacked, why you were already there when Kung Food appeared! Is that why you weren't in gym class on Monday? Between all the students who've been akumatized, and me - a-and you as well, us - constantly sneaking out, the teachers have been getting really strict on attendance. I tried to get to the scene of the helicopter crashed, but I couldn't manage it; by the time I made up an excuse that Mr D'Argencourt would accept, Nino was watching the news feed on his phone, and you were already shaking hands with the helicopter pilot."
Marinette flushed the same delicate pink as her jeans. Just hours ago, she had been complaining to Tikki that saving the world was a thankless task; to be getting recognition for her feats, and from Adrien no less, was more than a little too good to be true. "Y-yeah, I, uh, got in trouble for that; my parents were sent a letter because I was absent so much this week. But it wasn't like I couldn't go help, not when the alert came up on Alya's phone. Actually, it's kind of thanks to her that I was able to get there. She almost got sent to the principal's office for disrupting class; while she was arguing with the teacher, I looked out the window, saw the helicopter flying erratically with smoke trailing after it, and I knew I had to-"
Just like that, she was explaining to him how the mayor had insisted that the new police helicopter be demonstrated to the press before an engineer could properly check it out, causing a near-disaster; how she hadn't been at all sure that her 'unbreakable' yoyo string would withstand the rotors, right up until the stricken craft had landed safely in the net she had woven for it. Before she knew it, he was telling her about how Chat Noir had foiled a robbery that took place near the location of an Agreste photo shoot, apprehending the criminals without Ladybug anywhere in sight. (Marinette had been stuck in chemistry at the time - she had apparently asked Mrs Mendeleiev for one bathroom-break too many!)
Just like that, they were trading stories, asking each other questions, laughing at the things on each side that they had been completely unaware of - they were pretty sure they had transformed on opposite sides of the same wall more than once! Marinette could hardly believe that she had ever considered it a struggle to say more than a few coherent words to Adrien. All of a sudden, conversing with her 'Chaton' seemed like the most natural thing in the world.
They could have easily gone on like that all night. They only stopped when the alarm went off on Marinette's phone at a quarter to ten, making them both jump. She had set it just in case she lost track of time like this. Her parents would be going to bed soon, and they might check in on her before they turned in; she really had to get back in case they did. The cushion under her bedclothes had worked once, but she didn't want to push her luck!
Adrien chuckled as she told him how she had fooled her mother with such a simple trick. "You'd be welcome to stay here otherwise," he said, more than a little wistfully. Marinette wondered if anybody would notice if he was missing from his room late at night. If not, she couldn't quite manage to envy him, inconvenient though her parents' attentiveness sometimes was.
Speaking of 'attentive', she realized that Adrien was watching her intently, green eyes looking searchingly into her face. Realizing he had been caught staring at her, he smiled sheepishly. "I-I'm trying to convince myself that this hasn't all been a dream," he admitted.
Marinette reached up and gave him her customary bop on the nose - as if she would've had the nerve to do that to Adrien before now! - in the hope that it convinced him of how real she was. "Do I look like a dream to you, Minou?" she asked, giving his a playful wink.
Perhaps she did; he blinked at her again, as if he didn't quite trust his eyes. "You might be," he said, with another low chuckle. "It seems like a dream. I've wanted to know who you are for so long... now that I know, it's kind of hard to believe."
For the first time in almost an hour, she found herself stuttering around him. "S-sorry. I know it seems unlikely - clumsy, stumbling Marinette, actually a superhero who can leap a single-"
"No!" he cut in hastily, "I d-didn't mean it like that! I just..." He turned his gaze away slightly. It was so odd to see him - either of him - behaving so bashfully, she wondered if she should be the one questioning how real he was. "I'm just so glad to finally know who you are, I honestly couldn't be happier. I'm so glad that it's you, I can hardly believe my luck!"
She had nothing to say in the face of such lavish praise. She must almost certainly be dreaming - she had never, ever dreamed that Adrien, or even Chat, could possibly react like this if they - he - ever found out who she was!
He wasn't done; he rubbed the back of his neck, apparently sorting through his words. "I'm sorry, for being so insistent about it in the past. About wanting to know who you are, and for pressuring you about it. I know you would rather have kept it a secret, but... I really, really wanted to know. The reasons are personal, and I didn't want to force it on you when it really had nothing to do with you, but... you see, my mother..." His eyes automatically flitted towards the computer, and hers followed. The screen was blank, but they both remembered the photo they had seen there that afternoon.
"She suddenly disappeared a few years ago," he said softly, as if saying it any louder would make it too real. Just like the hugs, she wondered how long it had been since he had last talked about this; the words didn't seemed to come easily, though he determinedly spoke on. "One day she was there, and the next... she was just gone without a trace. The police searched for her, and Father hired private investigators, but... they couldn't find her. He was never quite the same after that. You saw today what he's like." He gave her the ghost of a grin. "Nino is a great judge of character. He was right to make friends with me, right to have a crush on you... and he was right about Father, he really does suck. I hate the way he is now, he's a terrible parent, but... he's the only one I have left."
He paused, giving Marinette time to swallow the lump in her throat; to blink through the tears that suddenly stung her eyes.
"I think he probably is the way he is because he blames himself for her disappearing. I know I blamed myself for a while, though that doesn't really make sense on the face of it. I just couldn't fathom that she was suddenly gone, as easily as that; there was no logical reason for it, no warning signs. I've spent countless hours wracking my brain, trying to work out why or how it could happen. I thought I should have noticed something, seen something that would explain it; but I kept coming up a complete blank."
He had been speaking with his gaze introspectively fixed on nothing in particular. Now, his eyes focused directly on her; the tender look in them made her catch her breath. "Then, when I met you, I guess I started to worry that the same thing would happen again. I know it sounds strange, but... the only way I had of finding you was to wait for you to turn up when an akuma appeared. I was terrified that one day, you just wouldn't show up, and I'd never know why; that I'd know even less about you than I did about Mother, and I'd have no hope of ever finding you without even knowing who you were, and I-"
She dove at him and knocked him backwards onto the couch, so forcefully did she launch herself at him. For the third time that day, she held him tight, clasping her arms round him as she stood over him, her face buried in his hair. He seemed just as surprised this time as he had been all those times before. She swore that from now on, she would hug him so much, it would become entirely commonplace for him.
She turned aside so that her cheek rested atop his head, freeing her lips to speak. "You will never lose me," she said, more sure of this than she had ever been of anything. "I'll always be here, Adrien. I'll never disappear on you, ever. I swear I'll never leave you. You can always find me, I'll always be here. I promise."
He hesitantly reached up; when she made no move to pull away, he gave her a strong hug back.
"Thank you," he said, in a voice that was barely audible; yet she could hear how much this meant, how much not-knowing before must have tortured him. She hated that she was partly the one who had done that to him. Her heart felt so heavy, it was about ready to plummet through the floor.
If she hadn't had parents waiting for her at home, she might never have let go.
"No absences or delays for the entire week," Tom said, beaming over the top of the school report he held in his hand. "I'm very proud of you, Marinette. You can go and join your friend if you want... though I'm tempted to make you beat me at Mecha Strike first!"
He smirked at her behind his moustache. Knowing just what he was teasing her about - a knowledge consolidated by her mother's meaningful glances - Marinette blushed brilliantly. "You know I'd win anyway," she retorted, in a woeful attempt at nonchalance, "so that's hardly necessary, is it?"
"Ditching your own father for a boy!" Tom declared, dramatically pressing the back of his hand to his forehead. "Such disloyalty!"
"It's not like that!" Marinette denied, turning a darker shade of crimson. "I'm just going along to support Nino, and since Adrien will be there too, we agreed to meet up and go over to the studios together-"
She knew from the significant look that her parents exchanged that they didn't buy it. They were quite right not to. It was a blessing that they weren't aware of just how much she and Adrien had been in contact throughout the past week; otherwise, she'd never hear the end of it! The attention she had paid to him put her schoolwork to shame, despite her improved grades. In fact, he was part of the reason behind it.
After learning why she hadn't been able to join him and Nino at the tv studios, Adrien had insisted on helping her catch up on her schoolwork, coaching her through a tricky set of physics questions over Skype. They had agreed that acting overly-familiar with each other out of the blue at school would appear suspicious, so they had been very careful to keep their sudden close friendship under wraps. Marinette knew that Alya would go into raptures over her speaking half-coherently to Adrien, let alone hugging him repeatedly; luckily, for most of the week she had been distracted by pumping both boys for first-hand information on Ladybug and Chat Noir's fight with Jackady. It had been downright hilarious listening to Adrien talk about his 'interactions' with Chat Noir, as if he was a separate person; they had caught each other's eye as he described how Chat Noir had escorted him to safety, and both very nearly cracked up! Thankfully, Alya had taken her suppressed giggles for the usual love-struck behaviour, saving her from having to pretend to still stutter around him - that would have been too much!
On the subject of speaking easily, she expected to be grounded again, once her parents saw the phone bill she had wracked up before they had wisely switched to an online messaging service. Although, they might be more lenient if they knew that she was actually now ahead in her schoolwork. Adrien was often given the teachers' notes ahead of time, to compensate for all the classes he missed while he was away on photo shoots. With his help, she had done a bit more than their teacher had already set them, freeing her up for any sudden akuma attacks. It turned out to be an uneventful week, meaning she'd had plenty of spare time for long conversations with Adrien: going over past exploits with him, holding four-way chats with their kwamis, coming up with better strategies for getting out of class, brainstorming excuses that would support each other. Just talking and laughing, getting to know each other like the very best of friends. Which was what he already was to her, really - probably more than just a 'friend', if she was being honest with herself. But there was no way she would admit as much to her parents - not that they seemed to be completely unaware of it!
As she shrugged off their prying and walked to Adrien's house, she fought down flutters in her stomach that were nearly as formidable as Papillion's butterflies. This was the first time in almost a week that they would properly see each other face to face - at least, until they met up with Nino. They had been consciously acting indifferent at school, and Adrien had insisted on doing all their patrols by himself, in case Marinette's parents caught her sneaking out and grounded her again. Sure, they had talked a lot on the phone and over the net, but being together in person, as their real selves, would be... different.
As she walked along the pavement with her heart sprinting a hundred miles ahead of her, she scolded herself for letting nerves get the better of her. It wasn't like she went to pieces around him any more - it wasn't like she could, after all he was just Chat, who put her at ease better than just about anyone could - no, this was... something other than the old nerves, though it certainly felt similar. She knew full well what these flutters meant - had known ever since he handed her his umbrella - and they weren't at all bad; quite the opposite. She had the distinct feeling she wasn't the only one who got them, either. From the way she had caught him looking at her across the room at school, before he flushed and hastily turned away; the way he sometimes stuttered for no reason while they talked over Skype - not to mention the un-subtle hints Plagg kept dropping every time he got in front of the webcam - she suspected that he often got attacks of the butterflies too - the good kind.
She had always known that Chat Noir liked Ladybug, but to know that Adrien didn't mind Marinette either... And to think that her cheeky Chaton was behind Adrien's gentle smile! If she hadn't already been in love with h-
"Psst!"
At the sound of a sudden stealthy hiss, she whirled and clutched at her purse, glancing about with senses on high alert. She could have sworn she had heard a voice she recognized, but there was nobody-
Realizing who it was and making a logical guess, she looked up. Sure enough, Chat Noir was perched atop the wall surrounding the Agreste mansion.
"Good to see you, Nette," he said, tail flicking from side to side as he smiled down at her.
Marinette frowned. Though he looked casual enough, she sensed some tension about him. He had used the code word they had decided on - 'nette', as in 'Marinette' and 'Buginette' - for when he needed to signal her to transform, without giving themselves away. (Her equivalent was to ask him about the new scarf Gabriel was designing, the true significance of which only she understood; given how fraught his relationship with his father already was, she would beat herself up with her own yoyo before she let him find out the truth behind that!)
"What's up, Chat Noir?" she asked, keeping her tone light in case they were overheard.
He gave the little eyebrow-waggle that prefaced one of his jokes. "Besides myself, you mean?" He straightened and strode along the top of the wall; she followed him away from the main road, stopping at a point where a tree hid them both from view.
"What's wrong?" she asked, in an urgent whisper. "Is it an akuma-?"
"No," he quickly assured her. "No, it's not- at least, not yet it isn't..." He rubbed the back of his neck, a gesture she had quickly come to recognize as a sign of uncertainty. "Well, there could be one soon, considering what happened last time someone failed on The Challenge."
She quickly deciphered what he meant. "Is Nino...?"
"He wasn't supposed to tell me what his challenge for this week would be, but you know Nino. He, er, has trouble keeping things to himself."
Marinette smiled. She had heard Alya complain of the same thing several times since the pair had started dating, in terms that were far less mild.
"He said that this time, the ones he's inviting to dance to his music are... Ladybug and Chat Noir."
"Oh," Mariette said, though this was hardly a surprise.
"Yeah," Chat Noir agreed. "He said that after they looked out for him during Jackady, he knows they won't let him down."
"And they won't," Marinette declared. Easing behind the trunk of the tree, she opened her purse, exchanged a quick look with her kwami, and said: "Tikki, transform me!"
Moments later, Ladybug leapt up onto the wall beside Chat Noir. "In the interest of akuma-prevention, may I have this dance, Chaton?" she asked, coyly offering him her hand.
He took it and bent over it, sweeping a gallant bow as he pressed it to his lips; the butterflies in her stomach started a premature dance of their own.
"I thought you'd never ask, my Lady," he said, grinning at her slight blush - though his face was much the same colour as her own. "With Adrien forced to attend a sudden photo-shoot, he won't be missed at the studios; and since his driver was told that he'll be staying in to finish his Chinese homework, we're free to make our own way there." He grinned proudly in response to her approving smirk; though she didn't normally condone lying, telling falsehood was fast becoming an essential super-power for them both. "Nino tells me that he has prepared a kick-ass mix for us - I have to agree, since it features my favourite Jagged Stone song!"
She smiled fondly, remembering the conversation about music that had led up to this - it seemed like such a long time ago, though it had only been exactly a week. "Well, that tv screen over by the park should give us our cue. Shall we head for the dance floor? I trust you not to step on my toes."
His mouth quirked sideways at her slight dig. "Wouldn't dream of it, my Lady. I'll have you know that my dance moves are good enough to charm pigeons - in fact, Jagged Stone himself once called me the most rockin' cat in Paris!"
She regarded him with a raised eyebrow; she vividly recalled his fancy-footed attempts to lure out Mr Pigeon. "From what I've already seen of them, your moves are hardly rockin'." She allowed herself a vengeful leer. "Have you cleaned up your act since then, or are you still not-showering?"
He blushed a shade of crimson that matched her suit. Ever since she found out that he had only been pretending to shower when she walked in on him, she had teased him relentlessly about it - she had to get her revenge on him for nearly giving her a heart attack somehow!
"In case you haven't noticed, my ears are perfectly clean," he retorted, fiddling uncomfortably with one of his cat-ears.
Taking pity on him, she reached up and tapped him affectionately on the nose. "In that case, Minou, let's go clean up the dance floor - let's see if you really do have moves like Jagged!"
He rubbed the tip of his nose where she had touched it, beaming at her. "Let's get this paw-ty started, my Lady!"
She groaned as they leapt off the wall in unison. She really wished she hadn't told him that his sense of humour wasn't that bad - he had been absolutely insufferable ever since! Still, as she watched him perform an unnecessary handspring from atop a nearby chimney, she couldn't find it in her heart to mind all that much.
He was happy, he wasn't alone, and she loved him - that was all that really mattered.
It was only later, after Ladybug and Chat Noir had delighted viewers across Paris, and left their DJ chuffed, with their spirited waltz to his remix of a popular rock song; after Chat Noir had pulled off some dance moves that were several decades out of date, while a laughing Ladybug countered with an elegant pirouette; once Marinette and Adrien were both safe and accounted for in their respective bedrooms - after that, when the two heroes met for patrol and reprised some of their dance steps atop the Arc d'Triomphe; then, she finally had the chance to tell him that it was her favourite Jagged Stone song, too.
They really did have so much in common!
Author's note: wow, I really laid the angst on in this one, didn't I? I didn't mean to, it just kind of went there on its own.
Readers who've read my other Miraculous fic will know by now that I like delving into the psyches of the characters, and Adrien is my favourite subject. Poor guy is a bundle of unresolved issues, and I used this story to touch on one that hasn't been blatantly obvious, but seems to be simmering below the surface.
While it's common knowledge that Marinette has considered herself unworthy of being Ladybug, I have the feeling that Adrien is the opposite: he thinks that Adrien would be worthless if he wasn't Chat Noir. In one of the webisodes, he said that he doesn't really like modelling very much, and it goes without saying that he outright hates how little control he has over his own life. I have the feeling that he is rather self-conscious about how sheltered he has been growing up; the way he floundered during roll-call on his first-ever day at school shows just how different he is from the average teenager. Besides using Chat Noir to gain a bit of freedom from his restrictive lifestyle, he probably sees it as a means of serving some greater purpose than just doing what he's told and looking pretty, which is what his ordinary life amounts to.
Sure, Marinette fills the same heroic role as Ladybug; but she has her ambition to be a designer, her duties as class president, and her pursuit of Adrien to come back to when she detransforms. What does Adrien have? His lessons, his modelling, and his infatuation with Ladybug. The fact that he hates getting attention and giving autographs as Adrien, yet waves madly at the cameras and seeks out Marinette 's praise as Chat, is very revealing. In his mind, I imagine he regards Chat Noir as his best self, and Adrien as the sad inadequate person he has to be when Plagg's energy runs out. It's similar to how Marinette takes on more confidence as Ladybug, but in a different way: whereas Marinette seems aware of how differently people must perceive her civilian mode as opposed to Ladybug, Adrien's dilemma is about how he sees himself.
Sorry, that got very Freudian. In unrelated news, I'd like to follow this chapter up with something a bit more light-hearted. I've been trying to write a good variety of different stories, switching points of view between the protagonists and avoiding writing anything too similar multiple times over. I'd like to try switching tones as well, in order to keep it interesting. Several readers have commented that they liked Chapter Five (Cheese) the best so far, and I must admit it's probably my favourite too; it is one of the zaniest things I've ever written! I don't think I could handle outright crack, but I'd like to try writing something else that's a bit like slapstick!
Speaking of funny things, if you haven't already, please go and check out theinkwell33's amazing series of stories, 'Behind the Masks'. As I've already mentioned, that fic was a huge influence on this one. The most recent installment of 'Behind the Masks' is based on a prompt suggested, so go read it, it is hilarious, and might tide you over until I've written my next update - maybe! ~ W.J.