CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

To See the Stars

Hanabusa stared at Kaede very carefully as she sat opposite to him in the booth at the café shop where they ran in so she could…vomit. There was no way to think of it elegantly or gracefully. It was mad dash so that she would puke everything out.

Her hair was a mess, obvious even with her attempt of tying it up in a bun. She had removed her jacket so that it wouldn't get dirty earlier but now she had it back on to fight off her shivers. With a cup of coffee in her hands, Hanabusa thought that the colour was finally returning to her cheeks but her eyes were still bloodshot as evidence of the near half hour she spent in the public washroom. They didn't speak. Until,

"I am so sorry."

Kaede looked up at the words he blurted out and he looked genuinely guilty about it, staring at her wide, light eyes. She sighed and rubbed her face before taking a sip.

"It's not your fault," she said. She felt bad too – she didn't want him to feel bad and she didn't meant to exaggerate it and made him stay and wait and hold off the manager along with all the other paying customers from using the washroom but she could not trust herself to get up.

"Do you want me to call for a ride back?" he asked, leaning forward. That same moment, she leaned back and against the wall, resting her head against it and he winced slightly. She moved her hands so that she was holding the warm cup of coffee near her face, smelling the rich aroma, but he could see the slight trembles and with a sigh, he got up – a feat difficult enough with his height and long legs in a compact, tight space between the booth seat and table – and slid off, returning back to Kaede's side as he took off his jacket and scarf, draping the latter around her. "Thanks." She smiled as she pulled it closer.

It smelled like him, she noticed. Like cologne and wind and...boy.

He nodded, but the frown was still on his face as he slid back out and turned away, pulling out his cellphone from his back pocket and quickly on speed dial, he called for a car. Once done, he turned back to Kaede, she had her head on the table, arms out stretched and fingers reaching the other end, her hair falling out of its bun.

He stopped.

It was as if Hanabusa could not not stare.

She rolled her head so that she was looking at him now, smiling shyly. He could see her eyes move across his face and for some reason, he felt him own self tense up.

How was this girl real? How was this girl, who was not stunning, or beautiful could be just as captivating?

When did his taste change from willowy girls with an abundance of long, wavy hair and smouldering eyes and eerily symmetrical faces to this? From girls to adored him, to a girl that could not even take him seriously? From girls that smelled of fresh blood and roses to girls that smelled of lingering, again no way to say this politely, of vomit and –

"Something wrong?"

He blinked. "N-Nothing," he stammered, his face clearing up of his thoughts, "I'll go get you some ginger ale."

She smiled again albeit tiredly but still just as genuine. "Bless your soul," she said jokingly but then stopped and he could see that she wanted to ask if he had a soul but then thought otherwise. Clearing his throat, he turned away – hiding the slightest flush –

"Do you have a soul?"

He spun back around –

To see an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, was that," she straightened up, "I don't know, the equivalent of racist of me to ask?"

He rolled his eyes, astounded, wondering why was it so hard to just cut this girl off.

xx-x-xx

When the forests of Cross Academy faded in the back and the water the separated the dorms and campuses ran underneath the bridge the limo drove on, Hanabusa – for the first time since they got into the car – lifted his chin from his palm and turned his head. His hand reached forward before he really saw her, "We're here– "

And he stopped when he saw that she was fast asleep, burrowed in his jacket and scarf, her head against the window. He sighed.

The door next to him opened first and he thanked God for it – if it had been Kaede, she would have fallen out – and he quickly walked around the car to her side, slowly opening the door with his hand quick to replace its spot. His legs bent, he caught the girl and her eyes fluttered open. "Hm? Oh," she murmured, still slightly a bit incoherent as she took in her surroundings. Leaning against him, she put out one feet and then the other onto the lane still lightly dusted in snow. He gave her space to stand up, his eyes refusing to meet hers.

With a yawn and a stretch, she took off his jacket and handed it back to him. "Well," she began, rubbing her face, "I don't even know what to say about that date."

"I don't either," he agreed with a sigh.

"I give it a three."

"A negative twelve, on my part."

She laughed, and that brought up the negative score to at least a positive one. He smiled a bit as well. Shaking her hair with her fingers, she glanced back behind her at the entrance and then at him. "So is this the part you drag me off into the woods and suck my blood?"

"Are you offering?"

Her smile widened and he seriously wondered if she knew that he was not joking when he told her he was a vampire. Or maybe she just genuinely did not care, as long as she remained alive. "I don't think you apologized, you know."

He blinked and then opened his mouth before stepping closer quickly. "I'm sorry –"

She held up her hand and stepped back onto the car. "Too close," she said and then placed a hand over her mouth, "I was just puking my insides out an hour ago. Do you really want to get that close?" He moved back slightly more for her comfort than his but she took it as something along the lines of disgust so with eyes on the ground for a brief moment, she said, "I'm going to take my leave now."

He started. "Wait –"

Her eyes flickered up and she smiled a little before turning. "Thanks for…" Her hands gestured nonsense, fluttering, unsure what to call it, "well…this." She paused, and he could tell that something was becoming serious. "Look," she began, "this was," again, she didn't seem to have the right words for it so she settled with, "memorable but I think that…it's better if we just pretend that nothing happened."

"Nothing?" he echoed, sounding lost. She didn't look at him. Any lightness went away.

"Nothing – everything. I'm leaving anyway," her voice was quiet, "and it's just better if I pretend I don't know…anything."

"Is that what you want?" he asked. He so badly wished that things went back to the way when Kaede was asking if it was racist to assume he had no soul – and now, from a drizzle to a storm, she was saying the thing they both had been expecting.

"I'm leaving anyway," she repeated, and this time when she looked at him, it was with a new resolution. They were saying goodbye on good terms. It wasn't because he had drunk her blood and erased her memory, it wasn't because she just suddenly cut him off; they had a good date, and it just so happened that they both knew that nothing could ever grow from it. They were reaching a point, and this was exactly what he needed: an agreed break up of a relationship that had never existed.

"So, we're…okay?" she asked, making sure.

Strangely enough, he thought she looked pretty. Open face, open eyes – eyes that were not green or brown but a light, strangely coloured mix – waiting for a response.

"We're okay."

She smiled, held out her hand. He took it. Shook it. And she waved. Before he could protest, she was already walking away and he could not find a reason to go after her.

xx-x-xx

Three weeks later…

A fresh new term called for more sleep, or at least that was my reasoning for ditching the exam review today. It wasn't as if I didn't know how I did for my exam – I didn't need to see where I went wrong. I knew that I did, and that was that.

At least I didn't fail math, barely.

And so, curled up in my natural habitat that was two blankets and half a dozen or so pillows, I was warm and comfortable and completely gone from the world when I woke up, startled, by someone hammering down my door. I groaned, ignoring whoever it was outside – they probably had the wrong room anyway – and buried myself deeper into the folds of my blanket. But the knocking did not cease and then –

"Open the damn door, Kaede!"

My eyes snap open.

Hanabusa?

Groggily, I got out of bed, wearing the blanket around me like a cloak before I slowly open the door, my eyes barely open to protect against the light in the hallway. And true to my guess, there was Hanabusa, furious, pushing the door open so he could slide inside. I didn't do much to stop him, although I knew that I really should have. And how did he keep on getting inside the Sun Dorms anyway? Could money really buy the safety of all the humans from one, possibly bipolar vampire? "I thought we agreed that –"

He whipped out a piece of paper, his eyes wide and animated. "Are you serious, Misane?" he demanded.

I blinked.

That was my report.

"How did you get my –"

"A 56? In math? After I tutored you every day for a month?" he shouted, furious. But I couldn't understand why he looked so genuinely angry – it wasn't as if he got that mark. And how did he get my report? Tutors didn't have access to that, I was sure. I frowned, rubbing my eyes to wake myself up.

"Did you hack into the –"

"I spent hours going through everything! Every. Single. Lesson – every single goddamn formula. I told you what you had to study! I practically wrote down the notes for you –"

"Hanabusa, calm down. It isn't even –"

"You frustrate me so much." He groaned and dropped the paper. With hands in his light hair, I was sure he was going to rip it off but then he turned away from me angrily. I had no idea what was happening. A minute ago, I was sleeping peacefully and now, I had an angry vampire angry over a mark that I was not angry about.

Before I could even say anything – not that I knew what to say in this situation – he whirled back around and grabbed me, literally. Two hands on my shoulder, his eyes staring intensely at me. I froze. Then, he said in a barely contained, shaking voice, "I give up."

"On what?" I asked, eyes wide and emphasis on the latter, still beyond confused. I was pretty sure that we had broken off our weird friendship. In no more than five months, I was gone. I had no need for crazy, genius vampire boys.

But then his eyes only swept across my entire face with a desperate urgency, as if he was trying to remember every inch, and I had no idea what to do but remain silent and let his mania subside –

And then…

And then he kissed me.

Bam.

Took me a couple weeks, but finally. There. I hope that would be enough (for another couple weeks)... :) School is hectic, I apologize. But this story is not abandoned! I promise.

Reviews would be lovely and encouraging :)