Chapter 12: Talks of the Heart and Snowball Fights

Lily walked outside. The snow crunched beneath her feet and she pulled her coat tighter around her. Going for a walk in the dead of winter. Brilliant idea, Lily, she thought. She didn't mind the snow so much, it was the wind that did it. The wind that howled all night outside of her window. Last night had been a full moon. She'd stayed up worrying about James. She had finally been able to rest peacefully when she heard his footsteps. They had stopped for a moment at door then on.

She at least liked to believe that they stopped at her door. It was probably her just her imagination, though. "Lily? Lily, what are you doing?" Lily turned around and saw Karen running over to her.

"Hey, Kare," Lily said then turned around and started walking again.

"What are you doing?" she asked again.

"I'm walking," Lily replied. "What made you come out here?'

"I didn't want my best friend to freeze to death," she joked.

Lily smiled. "Thanks, Karen."

"I'm sorry about the James thing."

"It's not your fault. It's my own. If I hadn't left in the first place this wouldn't have happened."

"Hey, you were just doing what you thought was best. No one can blame you for that."

"I just wish I could back in time, you know? Fix everything."

"Yeah, well, it wouldn't be life if you could go back and make everything perfect."

"I suppose it wouldn't."

"You stayed up last night didn't you?"

"What?"

"Last night. You stayed up waiting for James."

"Yeah, I did. You know, I thought he almost stopped at my door."

"Come again?"

"I know, I'm crazy. I mean why would he stop?"

"Good question."

James was just about to fall asleep when the paper was wanked out of his hands. "Hey! That's mine!" he yelled at Karen.

"Shut up!" Karen barked.

"What Sirius sees in you, I'll never know," James mumbled.

"I happen to be a very charming person when I want to be," she replied. "Now, down to business."

"Business? What are you talking about?"

"So last night was the full moon, right?"

"Yeah, so?"

"What time did you get back exactly?"

"If you're wondering if Sirius and I went to a pud, we didn't."

"If I wanted to know that I would get it out of Sirius. Answer the question!"

"I don't know, around three or four. Why do you want to know this?"

"And you went to your room as soon as you got home?"

"Yes."

"Liar!"

"What?"

"You stopped for about ten seconds in front of Lily's room!"

"What? How do you know that?!"

"How do you think I found out?"

"I... She was still up?"

"Yeah, she was waiting for you."

"She probably couldn't sleep it had nothing to do with me."

"Don't lie to yourself."

"Look, I don't want to talk about it, especially not with you," James said, grabbing his paper back and pulling it back over her face.

"James, listen I know you're both as stubborn as an old hipogriff but if you would just give each other a chance, then you might be able to fix everything," Karen told him.

"Karen, I told you I don't want to talk about it," he said.

"So you don't feel the same way?"

"I don't know. I do, but I'm just not what's best for her right now."

"Since when have you ever cared about what's best for her?!"

"Don't you dare say that!" James yelled standing up. "You know very well I waited seven years for her! Yeah, I wish I could get her back, but it's just not in the cards right now. She's already on Voldemort's list, if her boyfriend was a blood traitor it wouldn't help."

"James-"

"Don't, Karen," James said. He got up and walked away. How could she say I didn't care?! She knows I do! I just can't do anything to harm put Lily I harm's way that's all.

Keep telling yourself that, his heart told him.

What?! It's true! His mind argued.

Well, while you lie to yourself, Lily will probably get married and have two kids.

No she won't!

And what's to stop her?

I don't know it just won't happen.

Sure.

As James was lost in thought, he grabbed his coat and walked outside. He was so lost in thought he didn't stop until he bumped into someone. "Sorry," he said.

"It's alright," Lily said smiling. "You looked lost in thought."

"Yeah, just thinking about something," James replied. "You don't have two kids right?"

"What?" Lily asked looking confused, then she laughed. "No James I don't."

"Just wondered."

"I think it's a bit early for that."

"That's what I was going to say."

"Why were you wondering?"

"You know, it was just on my mind."

"Me? Or the kids?"

"The kids."

"Hmm." Lily smiled sweetly at him and James resisted the urge to kiss her.

"Do you wanna go for a walk?" he asked.

"Sure," she said shrugging. "It's peacefully out here this time of year,"

"Yeah, it's really beautiful," James replied.

"I miss your mum sometimes."

This surprised James. "You do?"

"Don't get me wrong I love my parents and everything, but I just miss having a magical mum figure, I guess. That didn't make sense did it?"

"I know what you mean. Remember that time Sirius set the rug on fire?"

"She was so mad! She looked like she was going to kill you guys!"

"Yeah, I think the only reason she didn't is because she was just like us."

"Your mum? She was a trouble maker?"

"You didn't think I got it from my dad did you?"

"Yeah, sort of."

"I still miss her. I miss them both."

"I can't say I know how you feel, but I'm always here if you want to talk."

"Thanks."

"No problem."

"James! Help me, mate!" Sirius yelled running up to them

"What did you do, now?" James asked annoyed.

"I may or may not have made Karen mad," Sirius said hiding behind James.

"You're on your own!" James said. "I remember what happened last time we made Karen mad."

"Oh come on she's not that bad," Lily said. "Besides she's your girlfriend, doesn't that count for something?"

"No, it doesn't," Karen said from behind them, holding a snowball.

"Hi, Karen," Sirius said backing away. "You know, I think there is some great hot chocolate in the house."

"Really? Why do I not care?" she asked advancing.

"Karen, calm down," Lily said. "It can't be that bad."

"Oh it was," she replied.

"Sorry, but I'm going to still with Sirius on this one," James said.

"I-" Karen was cut off as a snowball hit her directly in the middle of the face.

"Sirius! Do you want to get killed?" Lily seethed. Karen's snowball was already out of her hand and had landed in Sirius' hair.

"My hair!" Sirius shouted.

"Opps!" Karen said. "I'm so sorry."

She reached down to pick up another snowball as did Sirius. "This is a bad idea, you know that right?" James asked Sirius as he bent down too.

"Who cares?"

"Violence is never the answer," Lily said.

"Whatever, Evans," Sirius said dismissively.

"Well, when you-" Lily was hit in the side with a wet snowball.

"I'm officially on Karen's side," she said.

"Nice, Sirius," James said.

"Opps."

Later that day they all went in soaking wet but happy.