Dreaming of reality chapter 9

"Babe?" Lealia rose from her bed rubbing her eyes. She turned over and saw Damien there staring at her smiling widely.

"Ugh. What time is it?" she said flipping the covers up and turning her feet out. She placed her feet in her slippers and moved across the room to fetch her bath robe.

"A little after ten." He said as he continued to tie his tie in front of the mirror. "I know you have to teach your lessons at twelve. Do you want me to pick up some dinner on my way home?"

She moved into the bathroom and began to run the water. "No, it's fine. I already pulled out some steak for tonight." She exited the bathroom and went to help him with the tie. His hands fell as she took control and smiled up at him. "Forever hopeless with these things, aren't you, hun?"

He laughed. "What would I do without you?"

She smiled brightly and leaned up to plant a soft kiss on his lips. "You will never know."

"Anders!" I stormed into the clinic hoping to find the mage unoccupied, unfortunately that wasn't the case.

"Ah, Hawke." He smiled brightly at me before turning back to his patient. "Now don't come running to me the next time you pick up one of these diseases."

The woman hopped off of the cot and looked Anders right in the face. "Why have magic then?" she said turning, she began to strut out of the clinic, but not before giving me a flirty smile as she did so. I watched her as she walked away, her clothes barely covering her up, her daggers gleaming on her back.

"Who was that?" I asked Sebastian as he came in and closed the clinic door behind him.

He laughed and shook his head in slight disappointment. I guess that was someone I was supposed to know.

"So Hawke, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I want answers." I stated boldly, not wanting to bead around the bush. I was tired of being in the dark about everything around me while everything I remembered seemed like a lie.

Anders stared at me with a sad look. "I don't know if I can help you, Hawke."

"What do you mean? You're a mage! Can't you just… I don't know say a spell to get whatever memories back?"

"Would you really want me to try?" Anders face turned stone cold as he took in my words. "With all your hatred toward magic, would you really trust me to do this?"

I thought back to what he said. I had no memories of magic so whatever hatred he spoke of was a mystery to me. But it did seem unnatural of sorts.

I shook the thoughts out of my head. "Just do it, god damn it!" I took a seat on the cot as Anders turned his worried face to Sebastian. "Don't! Don't look to him for confirmation. I am tired of not remembering who or what I am!" I let my anger get the best of me and screamed the words. Both men looked back on me with fear and worry in their eyes. I turned to Sebastian. "Please. Please just let me see if this works."

Sebastian eyed me curiously, wondering if he should really agree with my choice. To be honest I had no idea what I was doing but being in this foreign world with almost no memories scared me and I just wanted to go back home.

Sebastian nodded.

"Alright." Anders held his hands to both sides of my head. "Now close your eyes and focus on your memories."

I did as he asked letting each memory flow into place. Damien and I eating dinner at Holo's grill, dancing at the club downtown, sleeping side by side. Every memory seemed more and more clear as I let them come through one at a time and I could feel myself smiling more as the magic helped to make each one clearer.

Then suddenly it changed.

I was running down a road, charred bodies lied on the side. My mother ran next to me as did my sister. My brother ran ahead. Behind us creatures followed, Bethany stopping them with her fire before them could catch up. ahead of us to more came, and carver and I cut them down easily. I remembered the smile that we shared as they fell. A bond through blades.

The scene changed again as I watch Carver being thrown. The creature breaking his bones as it pounded his lifeless body to the ground. I felt the anger inside me as I rushed it with my blades.

Scene after scene kept playing through my mind and emotions filled me. Damien and me, my mother and me, my siblings.

I could hear myself scream and I felt the magic break off as I fell over the cot and onto the floor grabbing at my head.

"STOP! MAKE IT STOP!" I felt arms around me holding me as I struggled with the memories.

She stood at the front of the wake beside her mother and sister. Tears flowed from their eyes as each person came up to give their condolences. Her eyes flashed to my little brother's face. Barely nineteen. His face looked some much more peaceful then it had in his final hours. She was just glad that her father had company now. She turned as another person moved down the row to shake her hand.

"I am deeply sorry for your loss." She took the man's hand before looking up into his face. His beautiful blues eyes held a sorrow she couldn't understand. "How did you know my brother?" she asked, surprised that she could even from the words.

"I worked a long side the doctor while he was in the hospital." He glanced at the body in the casket. "I have never seen anyone as strong and willing as him. He rests at the Maker's side now. God has certainly come across an angel in this one." He said smiling to her.

"Well, thank you." she said smiling lightly as his comment.

He certainly has.

The screaming stopped and Lealia's body became limp in Sebastian's arms.

"She's passed out." Anders said looking under at her face. "I don't know what happened." The mage began as Sebastian lifted her into his arms. "One minute everything was going fine and the next…"

Anders paused, looking lost and fearful. "I do not think this is a problem that magic can solve."

Sebastian looked from the mage and then back to the woman in his arms. "We shall solve it without it, then." And he moved out the clinic, Hawke in hand.

A/N tiny bit of lealia's real world background and how carver died in her world. The next chapter will have to do with the story line sometimes after Hawke's mother's death so I hope you guys stick around for that! Reviews and comments or greatly welcomed!

FAN QUESTION: what do you think is the reason for Hawke's amnesia if that's what it real is? ;)