My mom used to tell me when I was younger that I would find myself in a tough decision. That is what I call my life now an endless array of bad decisions and tough ones to make. However she always also said, "Make those decisions for yourself in the end, because matters more than yourself."
As selfish as that seemed at the time, now it seemed to calm me. I smoked a cigarette, on the wrong of town. I had taken work off and told everyone else I was at work. Nothing could go wrong. I was dressed in fishnets, high wasted shorts, and a high-necked sleeveless black crop top. High heeled boots covered my feet and a leather jacket from ages ago warmed my top half. Delilah was walking towards me, her red hair was done up in a rockabilly style, and she was dressed in tight black leather pants, a white slouchy top and a studded denim jacket.
"Hey hot stuff," I called, smirking as she flipped me off. She stood next to and gestured towards to my cigarette. I handed it to her; we passed back and forth until it was done. Then we walked into the club. It was a bar really, it had a stage pushed towards the back, and there were tables laid around it. We saw the others and I waved them over. It was a tag team band, random friends and people Delilah knew. Michael was our bassist, James was our lead guitar, and Tim was the drums. In honesty they were pretty cool and the bar liked us playing.
"Have you looked over the set?" I asked, they all nodded and I sighed with relief. I had been asking Austin to listen to my music for the past month but he was too busy with the record. I took a large step back after the letter, I had made up my mind and it was final.
We were ready to start, Delilah sat in the front table, and she was our official number one fan.
I took a shaky inhale and started to sing. It came like second nature, and before I knew it I was done with the set. The audience applauded, and we took a bow. We walked off the stage and sat down with the excited red head.
"That was amazing!" she exclaimed bringing the attention f a few people. She flushed red then continued a little quieter, "Have you guys come up with name?"
We looked nervously between us, none of us had really figured out if we wanted to make the band official, "Um . . ."
"Should we?" I asked, playing with the bottle of beer the waitress had placed in front of me.
"Maybe we should," Michael said, he was tall and had brown hair and hazel eyes, and a soft smile.
"Sure," Tim mumbled, he had sliver blonde hair and green eyes.
"I'm down," answered James, nodding and taking a swig of his beer. He had straight black hair that was shaved on the side, and wild blue eyes.
"You'd be down to go skinny dipping in the ocean right now, if we asked you to," Tim joked, sticking his tongue out at him.
"And that is why I am the fun one," James smiled dangerously, a glint in his eyes. He took a long swig of his beer.
"I'd challenge you, but I'm far too sober for that," I declared. He put down his beer and leaned forward.
"Then you are far too chicken shit to do it," he challenged. I felt a little of my timid, shy side come out, but then I remember that I was not timid nor was I shy. No I was badass and I just sang my heart out on stage, and I rocked. I stood and smirked at his wild blue eyes.
"Fine lets go," I grabbed my jacket and slung it around my shoulders, Delilah smiled proudly and stood with me.
"Race you there boys!" she called behind us, after we strutted calmly out of the bar, we burst to squeals and giggles before running to her car. I had taken a bus, she started the car and we took off past the bar. We got to the first light and next to us the guys pulled up.
Delilah screamed and hit the gas the second the light changed. We turned up the radio as loudly as we could then raced the boys to the beach. We didn't go to main but a little further up, it required us to park on the street and then walk down an alley. We parked and I started to peel off my jacket and boots. The guys pulled up and they were all in their boxers. Delilah and I screamed and started sprinting to the water. I managed to shimmy out of my shorts and I kicked off my fishnets off at the shore. The guys ran into the water which Delilah had already dived into. James and I stood across from each other.
"I'm in my underwear and I'm shirtless my dear," he jested, "You still have your bra, your shirt and you undies on. It seems like I won."
I bit my lip and looked done, trying to look sad, "Oh don't be sad baby girl. I knew you didn't have the guts."
I looked back up to him and smirked, "No it really is a shame."
I turned and pulled off my shirt, I didn't wear a bra. I didn't look back before running into the cold water and diving under the waves.
When I popped back up and looked to the shore, he shook his head and laughed. It was full of happiness and joy, he pulled of his boxers and ran in.
[BREAK]
"Why did you only have dirty white shirts," Delilah asked, she wrinkled her nose at her out fit. We had changed into out pants and the guys had lent us some shirts.
We were sitting in Denny's, drinking coffee and two am.
"Why did Denny's ban smoking inside?" I asked, "That's a better question."
James smiled, "Come on, let's have a smoke."
We both stood and walked out to the front, he pulls out a pack of Marlboro Reds and offers me one.
"You know that's a really nasty habit," I joke and take one and place it between my lips. H shakes his head and pulls out a lighter and lights mine and then his.
He takes a drag, "What do you usually smoke? Most chicks smoke Lights."
I laughed, "I do smoke Lights but that's because I just started smoking again, but its also I view smoking like coffee drinking."
"How so?" he cocks his head to the side. I laugh at the humor of the child like act of cocking your head but with a cigarette.
"Some people like stronger coffee to stay awake and because they need it. And others do because it's nice and they enjoy it. And sometimes those people want their coffee a little stronger," I explain taking a long, and deep drag.
He shakes his head again.
"What?" I ask.
"Nothing, it's just that," he laughs, "You always leaving me guessing. You really are something else."
[BREAK]
I was packing up boxes of my belongings in the apartment when I found the CD. I didn't really pay much attention, I just tossed onto the kitchen counter before I rushed out to meet up with group.
Trish, Dez, Austin and I had to go a meeting with Miami Records. I laughed to myself while I walked down the flights to the front of the building, what bullshit he was telling us all. When I walked outside, James was sitting in his car. I called and asked him for a ride. We also had to talk about music.
"Hey Als," he smiled and I slipped into his car.
"Why didn't you tell me you had a nice fucking car?" I asked a tad shell shocked at his '69 blue Mustang.
"She's a beauty and she's all mine," he smiled happily and ran his hand over the dash.
He started driving and we soon started talking about music, "So what was this idea?"
I took a breath, "Well I have some lyrics written and it's a slow song at first. Then it picks up."
"How does it start?" he asked, glancing at me.
"It starts with just me and then like a syllable in you start," I explain. He nods and then tells me to sing.
"Its sitting by the overcoat, the second shelf, the note he wrote, that I can't help myself to throw away,"Ising, I sing the next line which was slow.
"Then this is where it picks up and everyone plays, "I'm sorry about the attitude, I need to give when I'm with you. But no else cant this shit from me."
When we pulled up I had gone through most of the song, and he really really liked it. He made me teach him the first part and by the end of the car ride we had sang it twice through.
"The band needs to get together tomorrow and wok on it, and I think Tim has something he wants to share and same on my end," he says excitedly. I give him a quick hug and thank him for the ride before getting out and meeting the group in front of the building. Trish gapes at the car, and Dez whistles.
"Who's that?" Trish asked, eyeing me suspiciously.
"A friend," I shrug and hug both of them.
"You have friends?" Austin chuckled walking up and kissing me.
"Yes, what would you call you guys?" I ask, playfully nudging him.
"Family," Trish says.
"Charity," Austin jokes.
"Lovers," Dez says in a deep voice.
We all burst out laughing, Trish and I lean on each other for support. The guys quickly recover but Trish and I give into giggle fits every five minutes over the simplest things.
We make it up to the conference room, we all sit and they go into the dreary introduction of how they are a 'fun' record company. I pull out my phone and send a test to Trish and Dez;
I rather chew off my own arm off then listen to this –A
Trish immediately checks her phone and she snorts, the presenter stops and stares at her.
She recovers quickly, "I'm sorry but you are saying Austin Moon, Worldwide rock star will be making what annually."
They launch into discussion about pay and I get a text.
Hey my uncle has that shirt…the same uncle that still thinks in 1987 – D
I wish that someone would just randomly set of fire so we can get out of this – A
"Mr. Moon, are you still interested in signing with us?" the head of the company asks.
Austin inhales slowly, "I need some time to think."
Dez, Trish and I all gape at him.
I knew why he needed time, Dez and Trish didn't but still.
Austin stood up and walked out of the conference room, I quickly got up and followed him.
"Austin!" he didn't stop walking.
"Austin!" he stopped and turned, "What Ally?"
I stopped walking, shocked at the way he was acting, "I just wanted to know if everything is ok."
He sighed, and met my gaze, "I'm stressed."
"Everyone is stressed, but it doesn't mean you ignore your girlfriend and your friends," I counter, turning away from him.
"I'm sorry Ally, can we get together tonight. I need to tell you something," he says, he took my hand. I frowned, I already know asshole!
I took my hand back, "Ya we need to talk."
I turned away from him and went back to the conference room.
James picked me up, and I was relived to not have to play twenty questions with Trish and Dez.
"What's chewing at you?" he asked, I shook my head.
"What time is it?" I asked calmly, he quickly informed me it was four.
"Take me to a bar," I said, frowning at him, "Please."
He didn't ask questions just drove me to the nearest bar, I got out of the car quickly and walked in and sat down at the counter.
"Shot of Crown," I ordered and shrugged off my jacket. James sat next to me and ordered a beer.
"I assuming the meeting went well," he said carefully.
"I am about to punch someone," I seethed, the bartender placed the shot in front of me. I threw it back and welcomed the burn.
"What a fucking asshole," I ranted, "Another!"
Three shots, four beers, two vodkas later and three hours later, I was out on the dance floor. I was dancing like a stripper that had to pay rent the next day, and I really didn't give a fuck.
James was sitting at the counter drinking water and watching me like a child. I realized it was late, and I realized I was being stupid and my mother's voice was in the back of my head. But it all boiled down to one thing, I really didn't fucking care.
I closed my eyes and danced, soon I felt a pair of sweaty hands on my waist. I stepped forward and away and continued dancing. But the hands returned, "Fucking whore."
My eyes shot open and I tried to push myself away again, but I could get out of his grip. "Dance with me whore," he mumbled under his breath.
"Stop."
"Shut up."
"Stop!"
"Shut the fuck up, bitch."
I tried pulling away but he dug his fingers into my hips, and I winced.
"She said stop buddy," James appeared at side.
"Fuck off."
"I warned you," James grabbed my wrist and yanked me out of the assholes grip then he punched him.
The guy reeled back with his hand over his nose. James in slow motion looked down at me and whispered, "Run."
The man yelled and stood back up, James and I took off. He managed to grabbed my stuff before taking off and sprinting out of the bar to the near alley way.
I was laughing and standing in the middle of the alley way, "God damnit Als."
He pulled me over to wall and pressed his body against mine, "keep it down."
I my head I told myself that I liked having his body pressed against mine. So my hands reached up and started tracing patterns into his chest, his breath hitched and he slowly looked at me.
"Als," he whispered, he took my hands off his chest, "You're drunk."
I giggled and moved my hands to the back of his neck and played with the hair there, "I'm an honest drunk."
I stood on my tippy toes and leaned to his ear, "I do the things I really want to do when I'm drunk. And I really want to kiss you."
"You are danger," he whispered, his eyes hooded and his voice gruff, "And I was blind to it before I met you."
I smiled, "Kiss me James."
He kissed me, slowly, in an alley next to a bar, after getting in a bar fight. But he kissed me slowly and he held be tightly.
Bad decision, maybe.
He drove me home and kissed me before I got out.
"Tomorrow?" he asked, a smile playing in his eyes.
I nodded and kissed him again before going into my building. I climbed the stairs to my apartment, still very drunk. When I got to my home, I tried miserably at trying to get the key in. So I tried the handle and the door swung open and I fell in. Funny I don't remember leaving the door unlocked.
When I got myself up I saw Austin sitting on my sofa looking pissed.
"Where were you?" he asked quietly, his hazel eyes burning.
"With my friends," I answered, part of me knew I was in trouble, but the other part of me was drunk.
"You said we needed to talk, so here I am Ally and where were you? Out with friends!" he yelled, standing up in the process, "Without trust where do we fall! Without honesty."
"Honesty!?" I laughed loudly kicking off my heels, "What do you have to tell me about honest. Oh im Mr. Moon and I have a record deal with Capital Records, with a one mil payout in the first year. God forbid I tell the team."
I had mocked him and blown his secret, "Fine Austin. I lied I was out with a friend. What are you going to fucking do? Ground me? Oh no!"
He opened his mouth but I interrupted him, "You know what I should do, tell fucking Dez and Trish that you are leaving again. Oh wait I lied again-"
"I'm not leaving and I am being honest, I don't know how you know though," he was clam and upset.
"Because I saw the fucking letter! A month ago!"
"What the fuck have you being doing the last month Ally?! The last two! You are a hiding something, you are being distant, you are lying! I went to go visit you at work and you weren't fucking there!"
Wellllll fuck. My lies had caught up with me, screwed my mouth shut and walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of vodka and took a swig.
"Really? You are fucking drinking?" he mocked, I turned on him.
"Yes! YES! I am fucking drinking! What are you going to do? I have been busy. I have saved fucking Jay from ODing and I got a fucking tattoo and I had fun! I've been writing songs for myself and doing shit I want to do," I walked towards him and poked him in the chest but I burst out laughing. "I have been lying! I've been me for the last two months."
"What have you done Ally?" his face was scrunched up in anger.
"I kissed two people that weren't you," I whisper, I said the words and my heart broke. I saw his eyes break and I heard it break. I covered my mouth and shook my head.
"I'm sorry Austin," I pleaded, "I was being stupid, Austin."
The words didn't reach his ears, he shook his head and walked out of my house. I burst out crying the second the door closed and I rocked slowly back and forth against the far wall.
Bad decision, defiantly.
HEY Guys! Sorry it's been so long, school has really been kicking my ass. But here's a new installment and I do own the plot and the yadda yadda yadaa but I do not own the characters or the show.
But yay this was a sad chapter to finish. Sorry, I'm half tempted to write this chapter a happy ending butttt no.
Remember to REVIEW PLEASE!
The song she sang was by Match Box Twenty-Long Day