The next day, Bruce returned to work at Wayne Enterprises with a bouquet of flowers for his secretary. After negotiating a five percent pay rise with her, she finally decided to drop the lawsuit against him. Bruce spent most of the rest of the day on the phone, first to Lex Luthor who had called him in a rage. Bruce calmly explained that he had been very sick yesterday, and the medication the doctor had given him had had unpredictable side effects, but that he was still disinclined to work with LexCorp in order to build nuclear weapons. Luthor would have argued the point, but after yesterday's meeting, he had decided to drop his professional dealings with Wayne Enterprises for a little while. Bruce knew too much about his extracurricular activities, after all, and he'd rather build nuclear weapons with someone who didn't know he was the head of a secret society of supervillains – it would be easier to gain their trust.
Bruce then called Selina, who ignored his calls at first, but finally picked up after Bruce left a message on her answering machine explaining about the medication. He then arranged a date with her for Saturday night, promising that he would never again take said medication, and promising to buy her a store full of jewelry as an apology.
He had just hung up the phone and begun to relax, feeling grateful that things were back to normal, when a knock came on his office door. "Come in," said Bruce.
"Mr. Wayne, we thought you'd like to know that we've ordered the gold, and the architect is on his way to discuss designs," said Lucius Fox, entering the room with a folder. "He's sent over some preliminary sketches…"
"Sketches?" repeated Bruce, puzzled. "For what?"
"For the statue, sir," replied Lucius. "That you ordered yesterday."
"What statue?" demanded Bruce, grabbing the folder from Lucius. His face fell in horror as he opened it to reveal pictures of the Joker.
"There are so many executive decisions to be made for it, sir – do you want him with his cane, wearing his hat, standing up or sitting down, or maybe even in his car…"
"Why would you ever build a statue to the Joker?!" roared Bruce, glaring up at him in fury.
"Because…you ordered us to, sir," said Lucius, slowly. "You were most insistent, despite our objections…"
"If I ever give an order like that again, I want you to call the police on me and have me shipped off to Arkham!" snapped Bruce. "I obviously wasn't in my right mind at the time, and I'm honestly concerned that my board would agree to something that's so clearly insane! Don't you have a mind of your own?!"
"Yes, sir, but the board was more concerned with placating you and keeping their jobs, however temporarily we'd have them after Wayne Enterprises endorses the Joker," retorted Lucius.
Bruce growled. "I took some…bad medication yesterday which my doctor gave me by mistake. I was not in control of anything I said and did, and everything I said and did should be ignored. Forget it ever happened, if possible. It's not ever going to happen again."
"I'm very relieved to hear it, Mr. Wayne," said Lucius. "And the board will be too."
"I'll meet with them now, so we can set out the new investment strategies," said Bruce, standing up. "And it's not going to be for ridiculous statues. The first order of business will be to send back the gold, and dismiss the architect."
"Excellent, Mr. Wayne," said Lucius. "It's good to have you back to your old self, sir."
"Yes," muttered Bruce under his breath. "I honestly wish I'd never left."
The End