Sorry if this chapter is a bad one.

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12. Drawers.

Connie messaged me on Facebook. She wasn't going to live in Lima, thank god, but she said she would come visit when she had free time and when it wasn't too cold outside. Maybe she would forget me and forget the whole thing after a whole winter.

I haven't hung out with Lark so much or the stoner kids. I've been busy with homework. But that doesn't mean that I didn't get what I needed. Sure I had my friends, my songs and music but sometimes I needed some more. I stole some cigarettes from a senior on the basketball team and the last time I did hang out with the stoner kids I managed to take some weed off of them. One of them, Chandler, asked me to hold some drugs for them until the scene was 'cool'. Whatever that meant.

So right now I had in my underwear draw in baggies; Weed, crack, steroids, ecstasy, LSD and meth.

I got Puck to give me Jack Daniels, and asked him to not tell Jake or anyone. He agreed as long as I got him another date with Kitty. Wasn't too hard as Kitty was a Puckbuger and agreed.

I was sitting in my room doing homework when Ryder called and asked if I could help him with some math. "Sure just come on over. When we're done my Mom said we could have the leftover dinner from last night. Your favorite."

Ryder came over here in ten minutes and came into my room. I shut the door and turned the light on some more. "Your Mom is cool with the door shut?"

"She trusts me." I said to him.

Ryder sniffed a little and made a face. A disgusted one. "I have a stuffy nose, but no offense your room smells like shit."

"Well excuse me I don't have time to do my laundry!" I yelled. But laughed and said, "Besides I'm just a little behind due to homework and writing songs."

"It smells like someone been smoking in here. Lark?" He gave a cold, dark glare. I shook my head. "Good."

We did our math homework but halfway into it we started to get bored and instead laughed about other things and spoke. He did ask about Lark and I told him I haven't seen him in a while. I didn't admit that I missed hanging out with him but I did miss him.

"Good. He's not a good guy." Ryder told me. He coughed a few times then sneezed. "I hate being sick."

"Oh I'm sorry. I have some Tylenol downstairs if you want some." I said. Just then my light flicked on and off. The one above my white dresser. "Stupid light."

"Do you mind?" He asked me, regarding the medicine.

"Sure. I'll be right back up." I said to him.

I walked downstairs and saw Mom putting her jacket on. "I'm just heading to work now. I'm covering someone until midnight. You and Ryder behave yourselves, alright?"

"Okay." I told her.

I grabbed the medicine when I remembered that I had a lighter and a cigarette in my pocket. Maybe just one. I called up to the stairs. "Hey Ryder, I'm going to heat up the food. You can have the medicine down here."

"Okay Marley."

I went back to the kitchen and started to heat up the food again. It was freezing cold so I had to place it back in the microwave for at least five minutes. I did so and took out the sauce and some bread to add to it. I stepped outside to the backyard and lit up the cigarette and placed it in my mouth. I held it, let the smoke enter me, took it out and released the smoke from my mouth. Any stress I had in me was gone and I felt like myself again, so I placed it my mouth again. I did it again.

I heard something break inside my house minutes later. I dropped the cigarette and stepped on it, ran inside and yelled, "Ryder!?"

"I was fixing your light and fell! I'm okay! Food done!?"

The microwaved beeped. "Just finished."

I put the lighter in my pocket and took big bowl of pasta out, then put the sauce in for a few minutes. Ryder must be cleaning up the room a little bit before coming down and eating. I poured the now ready sauce over the pasta, grabbed some Parmesan cheese from the cabinet and put a bit on the sauce.

Ryder's feet came down the stairs finally. He usually ran into the kitchen when Mom made spaghetti and meatballs. Except there were no meatballs tonight, but he wouldn't care. He was also sick so he probably wanted to take his time getting inside the kitchen. "Finally, I thought you broke a bone or something."

"Marley." His voice was soft.

"Thanks for fixing the light though. Or attempting to fix it."

"Marley." His voice was still soft, but louder.

"You didn't need too fix it though."

"Marley, turn around!" He raised his voice.

I turned around to see him standing there. A worried expression on his face, almost confused and frighten. I asked him what was wrong and he just held up some baggies. Specifically the weed baggies, the crack baggies and the cigarette boxes. I froze in my place and became as white as chalk with my lips tightly secured to one another, my teeth biting into the skin of my lips. I felt my lungs drop to my stomach and my heart stop beating. I dared myself to not look in his eyes, but I didn't dare myself enough.

His soft face was now full of questions and his breathing slowed down.

"Marley what is this shit?" He asked me.

"Old things, months ago. I was holding them for someone." I said.

"Don't lie to me Marley. Have you been taking drugs?" He asked me. When I didn't answer he said it again. "Are. You. Taking. Drugs?"

"No. I'm not. I was holding them for someone." I lied again. "I'm getting rid of them."

"Right now. Flush it down the toilet now." He said to me. "I'll throw the cigarettes out when I leave later."

"Fine." I said, grabbing the bags and going to the bathroom. Ryder followed behind me and watched as I flushed all of them down the toilet. I flushed the toilet three times just to be sure they were out of the toilet system. I turn back. "Are you happy now?"

"I would be if you didn't sound too pissed off. You better not be taking drugs Marley. Lark took them and he went downhill."

"Would you not compare me to Lark for a minute Ryder?" I asked with an attitude. "I'm not Lark. I will never be like Lark. Ever."

"Good." He said. He then smiled and said, "So, Shall we eat?"

He promised to not tell anyone about it. Not even Mom. So long as I never did that again. After he left I went into the backyard and picked up my cigarette and tossed that in the trash bin, covering it with other trash. I walked upstairs to my room and dug into my other drawer, where my socks were, and pulled out a cigarette.

I had three that night before bed.