Whhhaaaa

32. Monday, Monday.

I didn't talk to Ryder or Lark all weekend. How could I? How could I talk to someone who had cheated on and how could I talk to the one I cheated with? I couldn't even leave my room because I was too depressed. I took a couple of cigarettes from Minnie's room and smoked them in my room, not giving a fuck that I was suppose to be quitting as of now with the smoking. I just enjoyed it all that week.

Monday came. I put on a blue skirt, yellow sleeveless top and my brown boots and went off to school. I decided to not tell Ryder, just not yet. I'd wait until Friday to tell him so he would have the weekend to take it in. I'd rather do that than go through a week of torture with him not sitting with me at Glee practice and whatnot.

I was at my locker when I felt someone walk around me and kiss my cheek.

"Good morning," Ryder greeted. "How are you?"

"I'm...good." I spoke softly.

Ryder nodded. He took in a deep breathe and made a face. "Marls," He leaned forward and sniffed again. "Did you smoke this morning?"

I lowered my head and nodded. "Hmmm, yes."

He sighed. "Why?"

"Crappy weekend."

"What happened? The party?" Ryder asked. "How was that? Did something happen? Lark? Minnie?"

Quickly I said, "Minnie and I got into an argument and she's a little mad at me." I said. "She was drunk and was totally telling herself she could drive but I said she couldn't drive while drunk and I grabbed the keys from her and we just left. I got her into the back of the car and she was pissed at me all week. Like that episode of Full House with DJ and Kimmy at that frat party."

"Oh okay." Ryder smiled. "I'm sure she won't be mad anymore after today. You did a good thing."

I nodded. God I hated to lie.

I had to talk to Ms. Pillsbury at lunch about my smoking habits, again, so I missed Ryder. I missed him the rest of the day and at Glee too. Of course because it was Ryder and not me; Tina was fine with him missing practice. We danced a few times in the first number so Finn was the stand-in for the song. After Glee ended I went to the tutoring center and found Ryder in there packing up his books. I walked in and greeted him, but he looked angry.

"Stupid homework!" He yelled.

"What's wrong, Ry?"

"I have a lot of homework assignments this week and that means that right after Glee practice I have to go straight home and do the work. Which means less time with you."

"Oh it's fine," I said. "I want you to get the homework done first. Just think, we're almost done with school and then we have all summer to hang out."

"I know. But hanging out with you after school would be better." He muttered.

I kissed his cheek. "Don't worry."

That actually how it was the rest of the week. With each day that passed us Ryder was more and more angry by the day and it got harder to tell him anything else including the thing that happened with Lark.

Lark.

Stupid ass kept calling me every day this whole week. He kept trying to tell me what I thought happened, didn't happen. But of course it did happen. I was high and drunk and thought he was Ryder. I knew we did it, I know it for a fact.

I ignored him and didn't wait my energy on him at all. He could try all he want, but I didn't want him to be near me at all.

I tired to tell Ryder at the end of the week. We were making out in my room on the bed after Minnie left for work. Ryder seemed to be craving for every possible kiss we made and I couldn't blame him either. We had the rest of the night and it's been a whole week since we had a date night to ourselves. Ryder sat up and hovered of me a bit as he placed one leg over to my other side. He then quickly took his shirt off and tossed is to the side of the room.

Usually I'd be excited and start taking my own shirt off, with his help, but I didn't feel like having sex with him. I mean just exactly a week ago I cheated on him with Lark. His cousin. This reminder turned me off.

He noticed. "You okay?"

"Not really," I said. "I'm not in the mood for this. Just making out." I admitted.

He grinned. Of course he would; he wouldn't push me into anything. Ryder leaned back down and kissed my mouth. "Okay then, we can just make out." He then proceeded to move his mouth over to the side of my neck and leave his bite mark there.

I giggled. Of course I wanted to do it, especially since we have until 11 when he has to leave, but I just felt horrible. And all the stress he's been going through for school and for National's?

Maybe I just keep that a secret. I just need to make Lark keep it too.