Whoops, it gets worse.
34. Telling Minnie.
I stayed with Lark for the rest of the evening until I had to go back home. Minnie was going to another party tonight but I felt like I had to tell her before she left. Lark offered to come, but I wouldn't let him come with me.
I arrived home just as Minnie was finishing curling her hair. "Hey, did you change your mind? You wanna hit a party at Lola's house?" She asked me.
"Minnie, I'm in trouble." I said.
"Trouble?" She turned around and looked at me. "Trouble as in what?"
I just said it straight out. "I'm pregnant."
She dropped her curler. Her eyes were like deer in a headlight. "What!?"
"I'm...pregnant?"
"You can't be pregnant!" She yelled. "Do you realize how much trouble I will be in?"
"It's my fault Minnie," I said to her. "Not yours. It is my fault, and Lark's. Just don't tell Ryder please?" I begged as tears flowed down.
"Crap, honey, no...you can't be pregnant. I will be the one in trouble. And Lark, since you say it's him as the father, and Rhonda will be in trouble—"
"Rhonda!? How will Rhonda be in trouble?"
"Were you drunk when you had sex?"
"That was the only way it happened! Plus I was high!" I yelled.
"Marley...look," She sighed. "Rhonda was the host of the party. She'll be in trouble for giving alcohol and drugs to someone under age. I'll get in trouble because I'm your guardian and I let you drink outside of the house and Lark will be because he is older than you. That's statutory rape."
"It wasn't rape! I thought he was someone else and I had sex with him!" I yelled.
"But you're under eighteen! He's older than eighteen!" Minnie screamed. "Did you go to a doctor!?"
"No, I took some tests."
"Pee sticks?"
"Yes."
"Oh crap, never trust those. Especially if they're from that cheap cheap general store." She said.
"On Riverbloom rode? That's where I got them."
Minnie looked relieved when I said that. "Good, maybe you're not pregnant." I asked how. "That cheap cheap general store buys cheap cheap tools like pregnancy tests. Like, you got how many?"
"Twenty."
"For five cents each, right?"
"Yeah."
"See! Cheap!" Minnie yelled. "Okay...listen...I'm going to find a doctor for you and we'll see if you are pregnant. If you are than we'll figure things out but let's just pretend for now that you're not, alright?"
"Fine." I told her.
"You want me to stay in for the night and talk?" She asked.
"No, I'll be fine." I said. "I'll just order out and practice my dancing for National's." I said.
"Alright then. I'm heading out to Lola's party. You can still invite friends over if ya want."
I said I would think about it and then proceeded to my room.
I saw Minnie leave twenty minutes later and then I laid back in my bed. I was praying I wasn't pregnant. What if I was pregnant? What would happen? What would I do? Would Minnie lose her licences of fostering children? Would Lark go to jail? Would I end up in some teen-parent-orphanage home?
I could only see it all happening...
The doctor telling me I'm pregnant and knowing it was Lark's baby. Me having to tell Ryder it was Lark's baby and Ryder never speaking to me again and I'm still alone because Lark is in jail for statutory rape and Minnie having to give up fostering me because she, in the eyes of the law, let me drink and get pregnant because I went to Rhonda's party...and Rhonda getting in trouble for having underage students and children drinking and getting high... and then I somehow end up in a single parent teenage home with other knocked up girls and I have a baby...oh my god! What if I have a baby born addict to drugs? Oh my God what if Connie found out? She'd call me and my baby Crack Baby for the rest of our lives...and poor Mom, her soul up in heaven, sad that her baby is having a baby... Oh my god!
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
Don't smoke.
Smoke.
I jumped from my bag and dug through all my drawers like a mad woman. After what felt like a million clothes that I went through I found four in a cigarette box. I took one, lit it up with a lighter next to my bed, and held it into my mouth.
It felt so good. So relaxing to smoke again.