TommyH – Thank you for your consistent reviews – it keeps me going – this chapter is not as fluffy so hold on.
OTHangels –Brittany and Santana will be in it more I promise but as I said before Santana has to deal with some really deep emotions right now so be patient but it will come. Thanks for the review.
sillystarshine – thank you I am feeling better. Yes whirlwind chapters are coming so hang on – this story is about to get more dramatic so hold on. Thank you for reviewing.
NayaFan - Leroy and Santana had something special and there is so much that Santana keeps holding in – she is just a teen trying to process some really heavy adult stuff but now that she is opening up more Shelby and others can help her process things better. Thank you for your awesome review.
NinjaGleek21 – The grandparents trip will be an adventure for all. Kurt wasn't enough to keep Rachel in that school – Shelby will find something much better for her little bug! Thanks for the review.
Random Dice – Thank you for saying you would wait for eternity for me to update but I promise I will never make you wait that long. Leroy and Santana had something very special and poor Santana has held so much in – she will always be daddy's little girl. I am starting to feel better as I type this so thank you. Reviews I think make me get better faster.
Mia125 – I am glad that I could make your day. Your words are so kind about my stories. Your reviews make my day. Thank you.
Stepheyy – I hope you get to see your Godchildren again as well. Thank you for reviewing.
broadwaybound2016 – All caps you must have been excited. I had hoped to get this out sooner and for it to be longer but my body said no – I am glad you liked it. Thank you for reviewing.
HIsland429 – Thank you for your review. I had hoped to cover so much more in the chapter but I saved it for this one. Joey was only holding out hope for a long lost friend but I think now she realizes that her old friend is beyond saving. This chapter will let you know about how Judy is pulling herself together for her daughter.
hersheysforever – Oh no – you must be in my head ! Haha – Hang on!
sophielovesglee – Puck will always take care of his little bug – but he knows that he has to give her space and he will. Thanks for the review.
Ryoko05 – Thank you so much for my hug! I am starting to feel much better – there will be more and more family moments trust me. Thanks for the review it is really appreciated.
AcexofxSpades – Thank you for calling me awesome. I loved that line myself and it is so necessary for Santana to believe it. Thanks for the review.
banjojd - Never apologize for not reviewing every chapter – trust me I love when people do it but I know that it is hard. I appreciate more than you know your kind words. Rachel is trying to gain more independence and she will struggle as she remembers more. Quinn has so many walls to break down that it is not that easy for her to accept people who are showing her love. Imagine rarely ever getting that. Santana and Leroy were very close and that is part of the reason that her walls are still very much intact. But even though it is a daily struggle for all – they will slowly process – albeit in different ways. Thank you for sticking with my story and I hope I continue to please you.
Hail the Wolves – Thank you for your review. I am feeling better so I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint.
marinka4 – Noah and Rachel will be fine. I hope you like the meeting with Judy in this chapter. Florida is coming soon but they still have loving grandparents so I am sure there might be a little bit of fun and relaxation for Shelby and the kids. Thank you for reviewing.
piecesofyourheart – Thank you for your review. I am glad you liked the idea of no number. Will Quinn meet the grandparents, not so sure, Quinn is not really up to meeting more people, she is having enough trouble processing the amount of new people right now.
md09 – Thanks for the review – there is lots more of Santana coming – although since it is a family's struggle – I am trying to make sure all the characters are done right.
Cookie – I am so glad that my story inspired you to write. Please don't put yourself down, you took the time to write a review and I am so thankful for that. If someday you chose to share your writing I look forward to reading it.
Renata – Thank you for the reviews and hugs, they are much appreciated. Rachel's storyline will continue to develop trust me – although I am not too sure how much Kurt will be in it – he sort of disappointed us all last time by not standing by Rachel.
w1cked – Thank you I am feeling better. It is a pleasure building each of these characters and I am hoping to show where and how Shelby gets her strength. They have been through a lot but even though some horrific things have happened Shelby and the rest of the family are hopefully showing them that it is not their fault and that they are loved. As always – thank you for your review!
Gleek1990 – Thank you ! Sorry for being mysterious but I can't give away everything. This chapter addresses Quinn and Judy's visit. I hope I don't disappoint you.
val-cb – more bonding for S and Q to come I promise but they are becoming more like siblings so it won't all be wine and roses. Thanks for reviewing.
SuzQQ – Wow your review was so thorough! So many points to address but I am hesitant because I don't want to give the story away. To address some points though – Joey and Judy grew up together and it is important for Quinn to see that there may have been a different side of Judy but Joey is smart enough and wise enough to see that Quinn is not Judy so ….. I promise there is so much more to come for all of these characters and I am glad you are invested in my story so much. Thank you for taking the time to review every chapter.
tcathing – Thanks for reviewing.
dreamchaser888 – Hold on because there is more to come. Thanks for reviewing.
FacingFuture – Thank you for your review. Quinn is still undecided about Florida but we shall see. She has a lot to deal with right now. But yet she thinks she can handle it all by herself – their essays will be interesting.
Anna – I am sorry I caused you to lose sleep – thank you for reviewing. I can't make any promises though about the characters – sorry.
Anon – I am glad you saw what I was trying to say about the number – thank you for the review.
lifegoeson95 – Sarah – thank you so much for your kind words. I am glad you are enjoying it. I love writing and I am so happy that people are enjoying it. So thanks again.
amandaes417 – I think all of us wish that we had a brother like Noah. Thank you so much for the review – they keep me going and let me know that people are enjoying my story even with all the angst.
gleefanatic14 – Top 2 ? I am honored – thank you ! With reviews like yours I am feeling much better.
hypegurl - Thank you !
Abby – I am sorry it is bringing back painful memories for you but the next chapters are really filled with lots of angst so if it is too painful I understand. Thank you for the review.
Fangirl44 – Thanks for reviewing – Florida will be coming soon I promise just a couple more days and they will be headed that way.
Chapter 23
Santana turned in her seat and looked at her mother. "Wait, we're still going."
"Of course we are," Joey interrupted.
"Are you even in this family?" Quinn asked with a degree of annoyance.
"Hey," Shelby scolded.
"No, I agree, Mom. Q has a point," Santana interjected. "I love you Aunt Joey. I do, but what we do as a family-"
"She's just as much apart of our family as anyone," Rachel argued. the eleven year old frowned. "And who's Q? Do you mean Quinn?" She looked between the two older girls and then at her brother. "I thought they didn't like each other."
"Quinn is too long to say. I call her Q at school," Santana said with an eye roll trying to get back on topic.
Rachel frowned and continued to look at three teens. "But you said you're a different person at school than you are at home."
Santana waved her hands in frustration. "Rachel," she said with an exasperated sigh. "Can we get back on topic please?"
Shelby looked at her eldest daughter, wondering what fight she was trying to pick now. Shelby watched her with her indignant frown and her mouth ajar. She knew her daughter wanted Joey out. She knew that Shelby was going to ask her sister advice about Santana's situation, and, Shelby knew, Quinn's. However, Santana's defense derived from her need not to have her business discussed. While Shelby understood in the girl's heart that Santana adored her aunt, it was just the fact that she was a topic of discussion that killed her, even if she knew that was what families did best.
She also took in the drastic progress between the two older girls. It had been as if a secret promise had been made, a pact or a compromise. They weren't best friends but there was a mutual respect.
"I'm not going to Florida," Quinn said casually as she washed her plate with subtlty in the sink.
"If she's not going, do we all have to go?" Noah asked. He saw his mother's face of annoyance. "She can't stay alone."
"Actually, I can," Quinn replied.
"You can't," Shelby said. Quinn turned and stared at her with scorn.
"What do you mean?" Rachel frowned. "I would like to see Nana and Pappy but I would be okay driving." She looked at the people in the room. "That's possible, right? To drive."
"We're not driving, bugs," Bear said.
"Dex and Griff are driving," Rachel said with a slight plea.
Bear picked up his niece and set her on the stool next to Noah. He smiled at the thought of his sons. "Dexter is in Atlanta and Griff is at the University of South Carolina. And we are in Ohio, do we need a geography lesson?"
Rachel folded her arms and said with a pout, "No." She glanced over at Noah who arched is brow. She lowered her arms and forced the frown from her face. "I just really hate flying," she mumbled.
"I can stay at respite," Quinn said with her hands on her hips. Shelby looked at her with a shake of her head and a questioning look. How did she know about that? "A girl at the group home talked about it. I know that you can send me there."
"What's that?" Rachel asked.
Noah looked at Santana who looked at Rachel.
"Nothing," Santana muttered.
"No, San," Noah said quietly. "It's where foster parents send their foster kids when they want to do stuff without them."
"Noah," Santana hissed.
"Noah, that's not exactly what it is," Shelby corrected.
"Pretty sure it's exactly what it is," Quinn said quietly.
"It's not," Joey assured.
"Yeah, it is," Santana said challengingly.
"No one is going to respite," Shelby said calmly. "Quinn, your ticket has already been purchased. Everyone's tickets have been purchased. We're going."
"I'm not!" Quinn argued.
"This isn't up for discussion. You're welcome to be angry about this. However, this is a family trip and you're a part of this family,"
"Actually, I'm not," Quinn fired back, trying her best not to see the hurt in Rachel's eyes.
"You are," Bear said.
"I'm not going and that's it," Quinn said as she started out of the room.
"Do not leave, Quinn," Shelby called. "We're not done here."
"Fine," she replied. "Well, you wasted your money."
"I didn't," Shelby assured. She turned back to Rachel who was now leaning against Noah. "For this week, Rachel, you will not fall behind on your studies. I'll come up with some work for you. You and I will see what other schools you can attend it will give us some time to look at them."
"We can really go back to discussing Quinn's chagrin about her attendance in Florida," Rachel said.
Noah scoffed. "What does that even mean?"
"Your sister has a big vocabulary list she works on andshe enjoys challenging herself on daily," Joey shrugged and gave an eye roll that mimicked her eldest niece's.
"Can I still go to my lessons?" Rachel asked hopefully as she sat up.
Shelby thought briefly and nodded but not without noticing her brother-in-law's look that was thrown at her. One that made her want to ask him about.
"With Mr. Schuester? Yes. However, you will be going back to see Elyse. We might even find someone new for you," Shelby muttered the last part mostly to herself as she considered the fact that both Quinn and Rachel would be seeing the same therapist.
"I don't want to see someone new," Rachel argued. "I can't. I dont... want to..."
"I can stop going," Quinn offered as she watched Rachel struggle. "I don't need to go."
"No," Shelby said. "We will figure it out. We have this week until Fall Break. I want all of you on your best behavior." She looked at the three eldest. "You're already grounded and that won't be ignored in Florida."
Santana groaned. "You're kidding."
"Santana, when I say grounded indefinitely, I mean it. You breaking things and fighting is something that I do not forget." She turned to the still sullen blonde, who suddenly looked like a hit deer. "You know why you're in trouble." Finally her gaze settled on her son. "Do I need to even say it?"
"Nope," he said popping the 'p.'
"What about me?" Rachel asked quietly.
"Do you want to be grounded too?" Bear asked with a chuckle.
"Well, I dont know. No... but...I did things too..."
Shelby looked at her daughter. Her daughter was asking for punishment, even though she was already punishing herself. "You can write an essay. You'll have plenty of time being out of school." The girl visibly deflated.
"I changed my mind," she muttered. "I don't want to be punished." She had wanted to be grounded like everyone else. She didn't want to write while no one else was around.
"We will discuss essay topics later," Shelby said. "Quinn, you and I have an appointment." The girl paled slightly. Santana tried her best not to make it obvious that she noticed. "The rest of you. Joey and Bear will be with you today. Best behavior, but that goes unsaid."
"They always are," Joey said.
"Are we seriously being babysat? We babysit," Santana argued.
Shelby ushered Quinn out of the room. "Really, San? Do we need to review the terms of grounding?"
Santana sighed and muttered an apology.
Shelby continued. "Chores need to be done. Joey, don't forget Rachel has dance at 2pm." She headed behind the blonde hoping to try to get her to relax for what she could only beg to be an unstressful visit.
"Shelby!" Joey called. The woman turned. "What about the thing during the thing that you were going to do with the thing?"
Shelby frowned. "The thing will not be done. Consider it forgotten. I have plenty of other things to deal with and that's not your thing to concern yourself with."
"You're so strange," Santana frowned.
Noah watched them as he took another bite of pancake. "I see that they're talking but I don't understand it."
"San, that'll be us when we're old," Rachel said as loaded the dishwasher.
"Honey, I'm not old," Shelby called as she went up the stairs behind Quinn.
"She's old," Joey and Santana whispered at Rachel.
"I heard that!" Shelby called.
…...
Quinn stared out the window a they rode in silence to the appointment. She didn't want to go. Shelby told her she didn't have to go. However, those two things didn't mean that she had any choice of going. This was her mother. Logic and reason went out the window when her mother was involved; despite the incredible severity of the absurdity, what Judy said went. And Quinn knew that not going to this appointment was unacceptable.
"Visits are two hours." Shelby's voice said suddenly from out of no where.
She looked over at the woman but she didn't respond. She wasn't going to have this conversation. She just wasn't.
"I really hope that you have a nice time," Shelby said as she gazed at the road ahead. "Are you nervous?" No answer. "You can call me. If anything comes up you just tell Jackie that you're ready to leave and-"
"I don't want to go to Florida," Quinn said evenly barely even acknowledging that she interrupted.
"Quinn," Shelby began.
"I'm not going," she said with a determined stare.
"We will discuss this more later," Shelby said with a slight shake of her head. "However, I want you to focus on your visit. This will be regular visits, Quinn." She glanced over at the girl, who seemed to sink in her seat.
"It's not about not wanting to go or enjoying myself. It's not that simple," the girl said dryly. "It just is."
"You have a say in what's best for you," Shelby replied gently.
Quinn turned to her sharply. "Then let me not go to Florida. Let me have a say."
Shelby pulled into a parking space out front of the familiar CPS office. "Do you really want to talk about this now? I would really rather we waited until later. You need to focus on this"
Quinn shook her head and was about to retort something but then she spotted her mother's car in the corner of the parking lot. She stared at it. It was a silver Cadillac. It had been a gift from her father to her mother. She hated that car. It was 'RF3.' No one questioned it's meaning; the other cars that Russell Fabray owned carried the same stamp, practically like the women in his life.
"Whatever," Quinn muttered as she reached for the handle.
"I need to walk in with you. Sign you in."
She didn't care, not about any of it. The office was like how she remembered. She wasn't watching Shelby and Jackie watch her or talk about her nor did she hear her talk to her. She was looking for her mother.
"She's not here yet," Quinn heard Jackie say.
She turned. "What?" She shook her head. "She's here. Her car is here." She kicked herself internally. Her father's car.
Jackie and Shelby exchanged another look. Shelby knew the drill. She hated it, but she knew her say was minimal. This needed to naturally run its course. She walked over to Quinn and pulled the girl into a hug. The girl was stiff but sunk into it. They weren't friends but Quinn respected her and trusted her, even though she wasn't ready to admit it. It was now as her mother's arrival impended over her, she had a new familiarity of what motherhood looked like. While Shelby seemed like a supermom, Judy Fabray still looked insignificant and lacking.
"I'll see you in a few hours," she said. "Try to have fun."
Shelby looked at Quinn and gave a small wave.
"Bye,"
"Take a seat," Jackie said. Quinn complied. "How are things going?"
"Fine," Quinn shrugged looking at the floor. "She's here I know she's here."
"Well she has to come in," Jackie said. "Do you have any questions?"
She frowned. "We can't talk about my dad, right?"
Jackie nodded. "Nope, this is just time for you to get and know each other."
"I already know her," Quinn glared. "I just... I don't know what you expect us to do. She's furious with me."
"That may be," Jackie said. "But she's your mother and she's supposed to be the adult."
Quinn shook her head. She knew that the normal standards didn't apply to her mother. She was a bitch and played dirty.
"I'll be here the whole time, Quinn," Jackie assured. "You have nothing to worry about."
The blonde girl gave a sigh. "Nothing to worry about."
Eleven year old Quinn sat quietly on the bench outside of the junior high. All of the after school programs had finished. Her own cheerleading practice finished about twenty minutes ago. No one was here. Her mother had told her to wait at school. However, it was fall and there had never been a moment when her mother was on time picking her up. Not once.
"Quinn?" she turned and saw Brittany standing there. She too was alone.
"Hi," she replied.
"What are you still doing here?" Brittany asked sitting next to her.
"What are you still doing here?" Quinn asked back.
Brittany gave a small smile. "Santana Corcoran and I are hanging out tonight, but her brother got in trouble for something. So they're inside talking to him. I thought I would step out."
Quinn laughed. The Corcorans were known for being slight trouble makers. Her father had said so repeatedly. He called them an... she thought for a few moments. What had he said? Oh, that's right. He had said that they were an abomination. She wasn't sure how one became one of those but she knew that they were. She sighed and looked up at the school's doors and the family came out. Puck, the boy, was walking next to Shelby who was still talking to him lowly and with a disappointed glare. There was a tiny girl on the woman's other sister who was walking as briskly as she could and it was bordering on a run. Her mother was holding her hand and she was having trouble keeping up. Quinn watched as the woman seemed to notice the girl's stressed face as she ran to keep up with her and mid-step in the highest heels Quinn had ever seen the woman lifted the petite girl to her hip. The girl must have been four.
"How old is she?" Quinn asked with a frown.
"Six," Brittany shrugged. Quinn noticed Santana emerge from the school and run to catch up with the family. They all had the same class together. "I know she doesn't look it. Santana and I put her on the teeter totter at the park. For her to balance and not be up in the air all the time, Santana and I had use our arms. We weighed her last week. Thirty-seven pounds. San and I tried to feed her steak and chicken and she just cried."
"Hey," Santana said, interrupting. She ran up and looked at Brittany then at Quinn. "Fabray."
"Corcoran."
"You ready to go, Brit?" Santana asked.
Brittany nodded. "See you later?"
"Hello," Shelby said stopping at the girls. She shifted Rachel on her hip. The tiny girl leaned her forehead against her mother's shoulder. "I'm Santana's mother, Mrs. Corcoran. You're Quinn, right?"
The blonde smiled and stood up. She learned that manners were important even if you were being polite to abominations.
"Yes, ma'am," she said with a nod. She saw Brittany gave a small smile and Santana rolled her eyes.
"Would you like a ride home?" She looked around. "Is anyone waiting with you?"
THe blonde shook her head and gave a smile. "She had an errand to run. She will be here any minute." She met Mrs. Corcoran's doubtful gaze.
"Mom, we should get home," Santana insisted looking at the little girl in her mother's arms.
Quinn frowned. The girl's eyes were getting heavy and she was shaking slightly. Even in those few minutes of them standing there, Quinn was sure that most of her color had drained.
"Is she okay?" Quinn asked with frown.
"Don't worry about it," Santana barked.
"Santana," the mother scolded. "She's okay. She just needs to get home and on her medicine." Quinn watched as the woman looked around. "I really don't want to leave you here alone."
"Don't worry," Quinn assured. "The principal knows I'm out here. My mother should be here any minute."
The woman nodded. She pulled out a business card from her pocket. "You call me if anything comes up or when you get home okay?"
Quinn frowned slightly at the card but nodded. "Okay. Thank you. I assure you, I'll be fine."
She watched as the woman ushered the children to the car. They were talking about something. The boy and Santana were arguing about something. The tiny girl started to cry. Brittany was trying to calm her. It simply looked chaotic. Maybe that was what her father meant.
The woman gave a wave as they left and once they were out of sight, Quinn sat back down. Her mother had told her under any circumstances not to take a ride home with anyone. She was to wait. Her mother explained that if she remembered to pick her up and found that Quinn wasn't waiting for her then she would have to assume that Quinn had been kidnapped. Mrs. Pierce offered to bring her home once and she took the ride. Her mother had not been happy when Quinn woke her up to inform her that she was home. Quinn frowned at the punishment that she received for that. She knew her mother would forget her until around six o'clock when she called for Quinn to fetch her ice for her evening bourbon, but she broke her rule so she was to be punished. Quinn's mother always knew what she wanted and when she didn't receive it, everyone felt her wrath.
Quinn sat back and watched the traffic of Lima disappear as everyone went home. Even the principal asked her if her mother was coming. He apologized for having to leave Quinn alone, Quinn assured him that her mother was on her way and that she would call him if the woman didn't show up.
She bit her bottom lip as she watched the sun go down. That meant that it was almost seven o'clock. She had been waiting for almost three hours. Just as the street lights flickered on she watched as a Cadillac pulled up in front of the school. She grabbed her bag and walked toward the car. She frowned when she saw who was inside.
She bit her lip as she opened the back door and climbed in.
"Hi," she murmured. "Thank you for picking me up."
"Yeah, you better be!" her father scolded. "Do you think this is what I want to be doing? Do you?" He shook his head in the front. Her mother was sitting silently next to him and Frannie was sitting sullenly next to her "I get home and finally sit down to dinner and you're no where in the house! Are you kidding me?"
"Mom told me not to accept any rides home," she said quietly. "I will next time if it's easier."
The car roughly skidded to a halt on the side of the road. He turned roughly to face her. "Come here!" he screamed. She bit her lip and leaned forward toward him. He grabbed her roughly by the back of her neck. She squealed as he pulled her close to him. "Don't blame this on your mother! She will be dealing with you when we get home. Won't you Judy?"
The mother gave a tight smile. "Yes, I will," she said icily.
Quinn didn't really understand what she did wrong, but she knew that logic didn't apply to her family. When they arrived home, her father and sister went to the dining room and sat to eat dinner. Quinn's mother took her by the arm and dragged her to the study.
"I did what you asked and waited," Quinn said quietly once the door was closed. "I didn't mean for you to get in trouble with him."
She knew her mother was under her father's thumb as much as she was. However, the woman just glared at her. "You are so ungrateful! Do you think we enjoy having you as a daughter? Do you think we wanted another mouth to feed? We didn't. You were not in the plan."
Her mother had said some terrible things to her,but she had never told Quinn that. She tried her best not to look hurt.
"Don't look so surprised, Quinn. You have been nothing but a constant disappointment," Judy hissed. She staggered slightly. "Constant. You're not as pretty as your sister. You're not as talented as she is. You are constantly asking for help. It stops now, Quinn." She leaned close to her face. "You're on your own as of this moment. I want you to make yourself as nonexistent in my life as possible. You bring yourself to school. You come home from school. I don't want to deal with you."
Quinn nodded quickly. She continued. "I don't want to have to worry about you. If I don't see you, if you're not in my way, you have nothing to worry about. And I will do you the pleasure of allowing you to continue to stay here. When I call you, you better be here. When I need you for ANYTHING you better come when I call, or there will be a price. But other than that. I don't want to see you. I don't want hear you. DO you understand?" Quinn nodded. She watched her mother raise her eyebrow.
"Yes, Ma'am," she said quickly.
"Because I'm a good person, I'm going to let you off with a warning," she hissed. She brought Quinn's arm close to her. "But the moment you break these new rules, I won't be as kind."
"Yes, ma'am," Quinn nodded.
"Good I'm glad we have an understanding. Nothing to worry about, right? Now go to bed," she said. "I don't want to see you for the rest of the night."
Quinn remembered how she had been confused about when and how she would be home in case her mother needed her. However, she learned that quickly.
…...
Santana had insisted on coming with Joey to drop Rachel off at dance class. She kept glancing at her oldest niece the whole ride there. The girl had never been interested in Rachel's dance classes before. She always preferred time with Bear and Puck, and when Joey's sons were around, the boys too. This was a new development.
"Are you going to stay for the whole class?" Rachel asked from the back seat.
Joey shook her head as she looked at Bug. However, Santana interrupted her.
"Probably," the girl shrugged, causing Joey to throw her a glance.
"Santana, I-"
"We're here, Aunt Joey! Don't drive past it," Rachel practically screamed from the back seat.
"Rachel," Joey scolded as she pulled in sharply into the dance parking lot. "What did we say about screaming in the car?"
Rachel shrank into her seat. "Don't do it?" she grimaced.
Joanne nodded.
"I'll walk you in!" Santana said quickly before Joey could protest.
"Santana," Joey groaned. She climbed slowly out of the car. While Shelby said she had endless energy, she didn't really. She had just finished a gigantic breakfast-lunch, brunch, and chasing after an uncharacteristically eager Santana wasn't a high point.
She walked into the building and was practically trampled by girls in dance garb. Damn it why did Rachel have to be so small? She thought to herself. Look for Santana, she coached herself. The girl was the same height as her. She scanned the crowd. Every child in Lima must be here for their class. All of the studio doors were open. There were girl's in pointe shoes. Tap shoes clacking in her ears. Then there were girls dressed like Rachel in tights, a leotard and jazz shoes. Joey groaned internally. Bringing the kids to practice was always easier than bringing Rachel to her things. They were always so complicated. Joey much preferred sports tournaments and practices than this. Finally, she spotted Rachel taking off her coat and draping it over a chair in the corner.
She frowned. There was no one with the girl. Jesus, Santana, she grumbled.
"Bugs, where's Santana?" She asked as she looked around.
"Probably with my dance teacher," Rachel asked as she grabbed her water bottle. "Are you really staying?" she asked with big eyes that Joey was sure could cure some incurable disease.
She gave the girl a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry, bug. San and I are going to run some errands."
Joey watched as Rachel bit her lip and they formed into a frown. "You mean you're going to yell at her for being rude."
She was her mother's daughter. Joey sighed. "We are going to have a discussion, yes, but that's none of your concern." She straightened. "Now show me where your teacher is."
"Come on," Rachel sighed. "It's Brittany. You've met her right?"
"Brittany Pierce is your dance teacher?" Rachel nodded as if the question was absurd and redundant.
"Yeah," she said slowly. "She and San are best friends."
Joey gave a little chuckle. "I think they're more than that, bugs," she muttered.
"What?" Rachel asked as she looked over her shoulder.
"Nevermind," Joey said as they walked into the room. Rachel nodded and walked over to a small group of girls in the corner.
Joey spotted her eldest niece immediately. She was laughing in the corner with Brittany as the blonde stretched against the wall.
Santana looked at Brittany. Just seeing her made her feel better. Yeah they were in a weird place right now. However, she just felt better about seeing her. She had forgotten about dance on Sundays. She was happy because now she had the opportunity to just watch her and pretend that things were how they used to be. Yes, they had kissed. Santana paused as she watched Brittany continue to talk to her. The kiss had offered so much and that's what terrified her. That's what made her freeze: the possibility. If it could just be the two of them forever, Santana knew that she would be happy with her. It was being with her alongside everything else that was scary. It wasn't just that she was a girl, even though that was scary in itself. It was admitting her love for anyone hurt. Because if you loved someone they eventually left you, Santana didn't know if she was ready for the loss of a lover, a loss of a loved one had been hard enough. She paused in her thinking as she continued to still hear Brittany speak to her with a smile about dance or volcanos or dolphins or something. She loved her? She had just said that in her head. She had just said she loved Brittany. She frowned even deeper because she didn't feel shock or awe or even surprise. It was simply an unspoken truth.
She smiled at her. She loved her. She noticed that Brittany was looking at her and talking. She was speaking and pausing and then speaking again. It was like she was waiting for a response. Idiot, Santana kicked herself. She was speaking to her.
"What?" Santana asked.
"You were doing that thing," Brittany laughed. "That thing were I talk and you stand there not saying anything because you're not listening at all." She shook her head. "We'll work on that. We'll have this conversation later."
Santana laughed nervously. "What were you saying?"
"Wouldn't you like to know," Brittany said with a smile as she finished pulling her tights around her feet and pulled on her jazz shoes. She talked to Santana and grabbed her hand causing a chill to run through them both. Santana stared at the hand for a moment and then met the girl's gaze. "We need to talk. Seriously."
Santana nodded. "I know," she said as she looked at the floor. "I'm kinda grounded though. Can we do it at school tomorrow?"
The blonde smiled. "Of course." She squeezed her hand tighter and looked closely into Santana's dark eyes. "I'm not mad or worried about our friendship. I know that's..." She looked at the ceiling as if it had her words. "Safe." She smiled at Santana as if they weren't in a classroom of chatty eleven year olds, one of them being Santana's sister. "We're a duo."
"A pair of lonely ones who were meant to be a two," Santana said with a smile as she quoted one of their childhood movies. Her smile faded as she realized the significance of the lyrics.
Her hand was squeezed tighter. "We'll talk later?" She quietly. "Hey," Brittany said as she started to walk away. Santana looked up at her. "You've got me and I've got you," she said with a wink. Those stupid lyrics Santana thought.
"Santana?"
She watched Brittany gather the girls up. She smiled slightly at her sister. She gave her a nod. Rachel started toward her. Santana was sure that she saw a look on her face and Rachel wanted to check on her. She shook her head at the girl and motioned for her to join the group.
"Santana?" She turned and her aunt was standing there looking at her.
"I'm just going to-"
"Nope," Joey said taking her hand. "We're doing errands."
"Aunt Joey," she said with a huff, not seeing her sister's look of sympathy and her aunt pulled her from the room.
"I was going to stay and watch Rachel," Santana argued once she took her arm back and they were in the parking lot.
"Bull," Joey said. She shook her head and laughed. "Are you kidding me, San? You didn't come here for Rachel you came here so you could see Brittany."
Santana put her finger up and pointed it at her aunt. "Don't put that on me! That's not what I did. I love Rachel more than anything."
Joey ran her hand through her hair. "I know that. That's not what I..." She sighed. "Can we please not do this in the parking lot?"
The girl huffed and climbed into her aunt's BMW. She sat there for a moment in silence.
"San," Joey began with a sigh. Their relationship was tumultuous but she knew that they were so much alike. It was just a fact. "I'm sorry. It's just. Did you want to come with us with the expectation that you would get to hang out with Brittany?"
Santana didn't answer. "You don't understand."
"Try me," Joey offered.
"I don't want to talk about it," she muttered quietly.
"Can I try?" Joey offered. Santana looked at her briefly and then looked away again. "You're right I don't know everything about what goes on between the two of you." She watched her niece look at her hands. "But I know that if things changed and if they got more serious I wouldn't love you any less. You wouldn't change in my eyes. You would be the same Santana to me."
Santana didn't look. She felt tears in her eyes. She shook her head and looked out the window. It wasn't just that. It wasn't that easy. "Nothing's simple like that," she said finally.
"I know that. It never is."
Santana shot her a look and then looked away again. "You don't know anything."
Joey laughed. "I know some."
"What makes you think it's about Brittany? That any of this is about Brittany?" she snapped.
Her aunt smiled. " I see the way you look at her, especially over these past few months" She shook her head. "I don't want to push. You're right. I didn't come to talk about that. I came to talk about something else."
Santana frowned. Apparently her aunt knew she felt something for Brittany. She looked at her hands. Was she that transparent? Who else knew?
"Hey," Joey said turning to her and running her hand over the girl's head. "I'm sorry. We don't have to talk about it. Not until you're ready, but when you are I'm here."
Santana sighed. Joey had been there for everything. She had supported her without judgement. It just was almost a let down knowing someone else knew something about you that you still didn't understand yourself. She felt exposed.
"What did you want to talk about?" Santana asked quietly.
"Your crappy attitude," Joey said still playing with her niece's hair. "What the hell is going on between you and your mom? You love going to Florida." Joey scrunched up her nose. "Even though you never will admit it. You and I both know you love it."
"Mom... um..." Santana continued to play with her hands and glance up at the dance studio's quiet parking lot. "... She uh... She knows that I sleep with guys..."
Joey nodded silently. Santana chewed her lip.
"She's taking me to the doctor tomorrow..."
The older woman nodded. "Did you tell her?" she asked.
Santana met her eyes. "No... not about you..." The young brunette put her head in her hands. "She's going to feel like such shit."
"Hey now, language," Joey said with a smirk. "She'll be mad yes."
Santana shot her aunt a look. "Not at me … well she's mad kinda at me," she said. "But you."
"I can take her," Joey laughed. "I knew this would come out anyway." Santana looked at her with confusion. Her aunt gave her a reassuring smile. "San, I didn't make you get tested and bring you to the clinic as regularly as we went thinking that I'll be doing it forever."
Santana looked at her in awe. "What?"
"Someday when you're a little older you'll understand, but I knew she would find out eventually. And she's going to be pissed as hell that I knew before she knew, but she'll also understand in her own way. I've known her her whole life." She watched her niece's face. "I know this isn't how you wanted her to find out about you..."
"Wait..." Santana looked at her hands. It was in that moment that she realized that because her aunt found her birth control and then later had her go get regular STI testing that she realized that her aunt's lack of questioning or prying didn't mean that she didn't know. It was something that Santana had always known but she was only just admitting to herself. She had convinced herself that this was her own secret, her own issue. However, the truth was she knew. She must have; Santana just wasn't ready to admit that. "You knew..." Santana whispered.
Joey smiled. "All I know is you, San." She continued to stroke her hair. "And I know that no one can push you when you're not ready. My sister will always be my sister and she will always be your mother. I know that you think you're tough shit." Santana gave her a frown. "Yeah, yeah. And you are. But, you're more than that, so much more. All I did was talk to you about birth control and made sure you got on it and took you for regular tests."
Santana gave a small smile because she knew that wasn't "just" something. She didn't want her mother to know. It was bad enough that her aunt knew things.
"Could you talk to her?" Santana asked.
Joey shook her head. "Santana, you know that you should."
"Please. You know she's going to talk to the both of us but if she talks to you first she'll be calmer."
She sighed. "I'll think about it." She turned and buckled her seat belt. "We need to go get Charlie some food and then come back to pick up Rachel and at this rate we're going to be late."
…...
Quinn had realized that they had been sitting there for a while until she saw the time on the clock. They had been here for over almost twenty minutes.
"Quinn?" Jackie asked. "Are you alright?"
The girl nodded. She was just fine. "Yes," she said quietly. "You have nothing to worry about."
Jackie sighed. "Well, unfortunately, Quinn. Your mother was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago. Our policy requires that we cancel an appointment after fifteen minutes, but I was hoping she would come."
Quinn shook her head. She had a feeling her mother was sitting in her car finding reason to even come in. She wasn't surprised at her mother's absence, but more she was surprised by her own disappointment. Shouldn't she have learned by now?
"I'll call Shelby and ask her to come back and get you, alright?"
The phone rang suddenly at the same time as some commotion happened outside. "Excuse me," Jackie said quietly. "Hello?...Yes... Yes... Okay... Well... you know what to... Oh... okay, I will be right out." She looked at Quinn. "I want you to stay here." She looked her intensely in the eye. "Do not leave this room. Okay?"
"Is everything alright?" Quinn asked.
"Nothing for you to worry about," Jackie said gently. "Just do as I said please."
She opened the door and closed it quickly behind her leaving Quinn alone in the office.
Quinn stared at her hands wondering what else she could do for the day and if she would enjoy Florida. She thought about the essay she had to write and groaned.
"WHERE THE HELL IS MY KID!" A voice screamed from outside the office.
Quinn squeezed her eyes shut. Her mother was falling apart. She had never seen or heard her mother lose it before unless it was directed towards her or her sister. She always kept her icy appearance together. Always together. Quinn felt an odd pang of guilt knowing that she was the cause of this mental break, even though she rarely felt anything else for her mother other than despair of who she never would be.
"Ma'am, you need to leave," someone said.
She went to the door and opened it slowly. The sounds intensified.
"I said," she screamed. "WHERE IS QUINN? I'm bringing her home this is nonsense."
"Judy, if you would like to see her you need to come back next week." Jackie's voice was even. "You're late. We talked about this. You can't be more than fifteen minutes later or I have to cancel."
"I'm here. Aren't I? I've been here. I..."
There was a crash.
"Look what you made me do!"
"Ma'am," another calm voice said. "You need to leave or we will call the police."
"This is my kid! My kid!"
"Judy, have you been drinking?" An additional calm voice asked.
How many calm people were there? Quinn wondered.
"No! I haven't and the fact that you accuse me of that is offensive!"
"Judy, you need to leave. Your daughter cannot see you like this," Jackie said again.
"She's here?" Judy said suddenly. "Where is she? Quinn? Quinn! Get out here this instant!"
Quinn remained hidden in the office. She knew she should go out there, but something was telling her not to. For some reason she wanted to listen to Jackie.
"She is my daughter damn it! So what if I'm fifteen minutes late! What good does that do?"
She saw a few people rush by the door mumbling something about the emergency process or the button. She shook her head. This was all about her. All of this was because of her. She walked out slowly around the divide that had been blocking her from her mother's view.
"Quinnie," her mother said with a satisfied smile.
Jackie looked at Quinn with a deflated look as if she had been hoping that Quinn wouldn't come out of the office.
"I can just go with her," Quinn said quietly. Suddenly she realized that the entire office was looking at her.
"You won't," another woman said. She had a sterner look than Jackie's. And seemed to enforce some kind of authority. "Quinn, please go into Jackie's office."
"I'm not a child," she said with a frown. She looked at her mother. "She's not a terrible person."
"I didn't say she was," the woman replied. "However, you are no longer in your mother's custody. Not only will you not be leaving with her today but you legally can't. Go back into the office. Now."
Quinn looked at the woman, unsure of what to do.
"Quinn, this is absurd. Don't be selfish! Come on," Judy said holding out her hand. "Let's go."
She didn't move. There were too many adults telling her what to do. "Quinn!" her mother scolded through her teeth. "Get over here! Don't you think you've screwed up enough?"
"Excuse me!" the woman supervisor said. "You will not speak to her like that." She turned to another person and said something quietly to her. Quinn watched as the woman walked toward her.
"Let's go back inside Quinn," she said.
Quinn shook her head looked at her mother. "No."
Judy smiled. "See my daughter wants me!" She took a step toward Quinn and the woman supervisor and another male supervisor stepped in front of her. "Get out of my way."
"The police have been called. I recommend, if you want to see your daughter again, that you leave. You being removed by the police is not a good thing. Please leave."
"My daughter is a lying slut!" Judy laughed. "The fact that all of you are protecting her from me!" She laughed and put her hand on her chest. "ME! Are you kidding! My husband and I have provided for her her entire life!" She turned and looked at Quinn. "You are ruining everything! Again! You miserable piece of shit!"
The woman supervisor put her hands up. "I've had it. Please remove Quinn."
Quinn just stared at her mother. These things weren't new things. Then why were her eyes stinging? Why did she feel hurt? She felt someone's arms on her shoulders leading her into another room.
"Quinn! If you do not leave with me right now, you will regret it! I PROMISE YOU!"
"I told you that you cannot threaten her," Jackie scolded.
The door was closed behind and Quinn felt her body sit in the seat. She felt numb. How could it be that things you heard regularly were so much worse when they were said in front of others? She didn't know what to think. She didn't know how to feel, because all she felt was empty.
…..
Rachel pulled on her coat.
"Hey, kiddo," Brittany said as she sat next to Rachel.
"Hi," Rachel said quietly.
"You alright? You seemed kinda of out of it today. You didn't do the turn sequence that you normally land and," Brittany chuckled. "You yelled at Stacy McPherson twice when she messed up the timing that leads into the jump section."
"Well we both know that she is terrible at syncopation and we need her to be able to count the music she is dancing to for the competition. She needs to do the kick on count five, the swivel on six and be done with it on time to hit the three poses on seven-and-eight. If she doesn't then we will lose. It will look like a train wreck," Rachel said with a huff.
Brittany sighed. "That might be true, but it'll come together. We still have a while." She nudged the girl. "So what's up?"
Rachel looked at her carefully. "If I tell you, you can't tell Santana... or Quinn."
"You know I can't make that promise until you tell me what it is," Brittany replies seriously.
"I was asked to leave the school," Rachel said quietly. She sighed. "Well my mother pulled me out... I don't know. I don't have anyone and …"
"Rachel that's not true," Brittany said quietly. "You have me."
"All my friends are in high school then or they're grown ups. Mr. Schuester is even my friend." She scoffed not seeing Brittany's look of confusion. "Probably my best friend now that Kurt doesn't talk to me." Rachel looked around. "The girls here never really want to talk to me." Brittany looked around. Rachel put her hand on hers. "And don't you dare say anything to them. I don't need their sympathy. or your pity" She sighed.
"Are you sure that's it Rachel?" Brittany asked.
Rachel shrugged. "I don't know what you know about us...What Santana has told you...Things are coming back" She chewed her lip and looked up at her sister's friend and realized that Santana hadn't said much. "It's just been a hard week," she said quietly back to her hands.
Brittany nodded. "Rachel, I might be Quinn and Santana's friend but you can tell me things."
The tiny girl shook her head. "People worry too much about me already. I don't need you to worry about me too."
"People worry because they care."
"Well then they care too much," Rachel said quietly. "I'm just... why can't I just feel sad? Why can't anyone just leave me alone without …. asking me what's wrong. …. Or punching someone who was mean to me... or," she whispered. "Pulling me out of school."
Brittany shook her head. "Rachel..."
"You ready, Rachel?"
The girls look up and Santana's standing at the door.
Brittany turned back to Rachel quickly. "I'm here for you if you want to talk, Rach."
Rachel nodded and stood up. "Thanks," she said quietly.
Santana walked over. "Talk more at school?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah, definitely," Beittany muttered.
…..
Shelby sat quietly in the booth in the corner. She had some her her work spread out in front of her. Thankfully her own caseload was a little lighter recently since she went to part-time. She ordered a piece of her favorite pie and tried to concentrate. She had to. She needed to escape from it all a bit.
"Is this booth taken?"
She looked up. Those damn soft eyes and boyish dimples.
"What are you doing here?" The question came out more accusatory than she meant.
"I got this text from your sister." Shelby frowned and looking at the phone. Damn it, Jo. The text read "if she cancels because she will, she'll be getting a slice of pie alone at this diner. She'll say she wants to be alone. She lies."
"You need to ignore her," Shelby said.
Gus laughed. "Have you met her?" He was still standing.
"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I have a lot on my mind and I don't know if I can really plunge into this thing that we have." Shelby replied trying to avoid eye contact.
"I know," he said quietly.
"You really don't," she replied quickly. "I'm sorry that was rude." She rolled her eyes. "Fine, sit down."
"Pie huh?"
"Yes," Shelby said as she began to exam her work. "Pie."
"While the apple crumble here is fantastic," he began. "I know a place..." He trailed off and reached for his belt. "I'm sorry." He took out his cellphone. "Baker... Yes... I'll be right there." He hung up and his stare lingered on his phone for a little while. "I'm sorry. I have to go."
Shelby shrugged. "It's fine."
He stood up and looked at her for a moment. "I'll see ya," he said.
She gave a weak wave and then felt silly with her hand in the air. She was also sure she had pie on her face. Ridiculous, she thought. She was acting like a school girl. She sat there quietly lost in thought. A date. She thought. When the hell was the last time she had been on one of those? Her stomach gurgled and what the hell would her kids think? She gave a shake of her head. The last man she dated left after about two months. Santana also superglued his socks to his shoes, thinking he would never stay over again. All he had done was fall asleep on the couch to a movie with Shelby, but leave it to Santana to make sure he never took his shoes off again. Shelby sighed. She couldn't date Gus. Nope. She would date maybe when Rachel left for college. Shelby groaned and put her head on the table. Fuck, that was an awfully long time.
Her phone interrupted her thoughts. With her head still on the table, she dug it out of her purse.
"Hello?" she asked.
"Shelby, it's Jackie."
Shelby's head shot up. Shit.
She was at the office as fast as she could. It was only across the street and Shelby had thrown her things as fast as she could into her bag. She had gotten over there as fast as she could, but when she saw Gus breathlyzing Judy, she cursed her legs for not being faster. She didn't make eye contact with Gus but went in search of Jackie. She spotted her talking with her supervisor, Gloria Hayes.
"Hi, is she alright?"
The women looked at her. "She's fine," Jackie assured her. "A little shaken up because of all that her mother said, but physically fine."
"I know that you're scheduled for a team meeting tomorrow. I will inform Judy that when and if she ever shows up at this office she needs to be Breathlyzed. Also, I will be present at the next few meetings," Gloria explained. "We're going to monitor her closely. Furthermore, if she arrives tomorrow, I'll explain to her that her visits are put on hold until further notice. I don't want Quinn seeing her like this again."
Shelby nodded as she looked around. "Can I see Quinn?"
"Of course."
When Shelby saw Quinn sitting there in Jackie's office, she wanted to kill Judy. She was sitting there staring at her hands.
"Quinn?" Shelby asked kneeling in front of her.
The girl looked up at her with a look that Shelby had only seen in those rare moments they had together when Shelby talked to her late in the evenings. Her hazel eyes were brimmed with tears. Shelby pulled her into a hug and for one of the first times, Quinn actually fell into it.
…...
Rachel watched Quinn carefully from across the dining room table as they cleaned up. All that her mother had told them was that the visit didn't go well. Clearly, Rachel wasn't the only one having a bad week. Dinner had been practically silent. It had been strange. Even with her aunt and uncle there again, it had been silent. Everyone had something on their mind. Quinn had picked at her food the whole time. She barely ate anything. Rachel heard her mother tell Quinn quietly that she would need to drink a shake afterward.
Rachel watched as everyone filed into the kitchen to clean up. She lingered for a moment with Quinn as they collected placemats.
"I'm sorry about your mom," Rachel finally said.
Quinn froze with the placemats in hand. She didn't want to discuss it.
"You dont have to talk about it," Rachel said quickly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to … Listen, I just...It sucks."
Surprising even herself, Quinn cracked a smile. "Yeah it does." She stood up and looked at Rachel. "Sit down for sec. I want to tell you something."
Rachel's brow furrowed. "Okay..."
Quinn took a seat next to her. She took a deep breath. "I need to tell you something." The brow remained furrowed. She continued, "I was there when you were hit with all of the dodgeballs."
Rachel stared at her in shock. "What?"
"And when you went into the locker room... I ….. kinda made the kids play a more intense game of dodgeball."
The eleven year old gaped and put her head in her hands. "That was you?" she groaned. "Everyone was talking about some blonde girl that was in gym." She shook her head. "I ignored it because...well... i was thinking about myself... and..." Rachel shook her head. "Seriously?"
Quinn nodded.
Rachel looked at her in realization. "That's why you're grounded. Mom found out?" Quinn nodded.
She shrugged. "Well one of the many reasons."
Rachel looked at her hands. "Why did you do that? I didn't ask you to..." She looked up at her. "I didn't want you to."
Quinn stared at the table. "Honestly, I don't know …. It just... It felt like the right thing to do..." She looked over at Rachel. "I don't really get close to anyone, Rachel, but you're persistent. And... it killed me knowing someone was giving you a hard time."
"I can handle myself," Rachel said.
To her suprise, Quinn laughed. "No you can't." She saw the girl's solemn face. "You handle yourself in you handle your own emotions about everyone being mean to you, but you don't handle the people being mean to you part directly. You know?" Rachel looked at her hands. "I know you don't want people sticking up for you, but it's not going to go away anytime soon."
"Aren't you being a bit hypocritical?" Rachel asked with a glare.
"Aren't we proud of our big vocab words," Quinn retorted.
Rachel cracked a smile, but faded slightly. "You shouldn't have done what you did."
"I know," Quinn said.
"But I'm flattered," Rachel said quietly. Quinn looked at her in surprise. Rachel frowned. "But still appalled. What I mean is... no one has ever stuck up for me besides my family..."
Quinn laughed. "I thought I was your family." It came out as joke but then faded into an honest question.
Rachel looked at her with a genuine smile. "You are." She looked up at her. "And … well... thanks for finally accepting it."
"I haven't," Quinn said quickly.
"I have," she replied. Rachel stood up. "I don't know what your mom said, but she's a big liar."
"That was eloquent," Quinn said with a smirk.
"Who's using big words now?" Rachel asked as she headed toward the kitchen.
"Hey Rach?" Quinn called; she turned. "I am sorry."
Rachel nodded. "I know. It's okay." She frowned. "Just please for the love of God don't do it again."
Quinn gave a small smirk. She was all over the place. Her emotions felt like they threw up on the wall after today. However, she felt grounded. She had fixed one thing.
…..
Shelby dried the last of the dishes and turned to see her sister staring at her.
"What?"
Joey looked over at Santana who was pretending not to notice she was being watched.
"Can we talk?"
Hi everyone, I know this chapter was a little blah and more disconnected than usual. I as usual got slightly distracted by a story arch way way way way down the road and wrote about 5500 words of it. I've been laying down a lot of pieces for awhile. This next story arch will reveal itself in the next few chapters. No one has really put anything together about what's coming, so I have a slight feeling you'll be shocked, but there will be a little explosion of crazy before they leave for florida. Thank you so much for your wonderful reviews. They keep me afloat in more ways that you know. Please let me know what you think. It would mean so much. If we're lucky we'll get another chapter up this week, but no promises. I dont want to get your hopes up too much.
thank you again for all of your support and love.