A/N: Shamelessly self-promoting my new blog once more. If you have a tumblr, I really want you to check it out. I'll post all of my story updates with links (oooh) and accepting prompts and headcanons for short unedited fills. haleyscircus. tumblr. com. Anyway, enjoy!

When Daddy had first explained special pacifiers, Kurt didn't know what to think. He had found his apprehension growing when Daddy unbuckled his pants and pulled out his willy. Kurt liked to think that he was the only person in the whole world that had a willy, and seeing somebody else with one made him squirm in his spot. Daddy had explained that all babies sucked on their daddies' special pacifier and it was nothing to be frightened of.

"It's okay, sweetheart. We can take this as slow as you need." Daddy had promised him. "You know Sebastian and Trent have special pacifiers too?"

"They do?" Kurt asked, a tiny bit of jealousy edging its way into his emotions.

"Yep." Daddy smiled. "It's nothing to be afraid of. Do you want to give it a try?"

Kurt nodded shyly, but hesitated when his gaze locked with Daddy's willy again. Willies were just for making peepees. Were they supposed to go in people's mouths? It sounded icky.

Daddy must have noticed his hesitation so he smiled and cradled Kurt's face in his hands. "Hey, I've got an idea. How about we make it look really yummy?"

"How?" Kurt asked.

Daddy glanced over at the kitchen and seemed to consider something before breaking into a large grin. "Hang on, sweetheart. Daddy has an idea."

And that's how Kurt came to be sitting in front of Daddy with a tub of cake frosting and a bowl of rainbow sprinkles, a rubber spatula gripped tightly in his right hand. He giggled and scooped more of the sweet substance from the jar before carefully slathering it over Daddy's willy.

"Make it even all around, baby." Daddy chuckled. "We want it to be pretty."

Kurt nodded and tilted his head to get a better view of the underside. He lifted the spatula to the bare skin, tickling and leaving traces on Daddy's thighs as he did.

"Oh my goodness, Daddy's going to need a bath after this." He commented, a giddy grin on his face. Kurt could barely believe that they were doing such a thing, right in the middle of their kitchen with Daddy leaning against the island in the middle. He wondered if Sebastian and Trent did this with their daddies.

When he was finished with the icing, Kurt grabbed the small cereal bowl of sprinkles that Daddy had poured out for him and grabbed a handful of the little candies. He did his best to be careful as he slowly released a rain of sprinkles onto Daddy's willy, turning the white surface bright and happy like a rainbow. Kurt no longer felt like looking away at the sight. In fact, he found his mouth watering at the sight of swirling, sugary cream and cheerful colors. Daddy saved delicacies like frosting for super special occasions. He supposed this qualified as one. Daddy sure seemed to think so.

"You ready, sweetheart?" Daddy asked, spreading his legs apart just a little bit.

Kurt nodded and eagerly licked at the frosting, wasting no time to fill his mouth with the sugary treat. He hummed contently at the good taste and put his entire mouth around Daddy's willy, his tongue rapidly slithering over every inch, eager for the taste. Above him, he could have heard Daddy gasp, but he was probably just surprised by how fast he was eating up the frosting. He swirled his tongue around, not wanting to skip even an inch of space. As he did, he felt the meat swelling against his tongue.

"You're such a good boy, Kurt." Daddy told him and his voice sounded unusually raspy. Was Daddy getting sick? Kurt sure hoped not. "Such a good boy."

Kurt kept going, pushing the willy further into his mouth so he could reach the frosting at the base. Some of it had gotten stuck in Daddy's hair, which tickled his nose and made him whine playfully around the appendage. Daddy's knees shook a little bit and before Kurt could comprehend what was happening, the frosting in his mouth was turning salty and slick. Nevertheless he swallowed it all down together and stretched his tongue out to catch the dabs of frosting that were just a bit too out of reach. He kept trying until Daddy had to pull away. The man kneeled down and gave Kurt a big kiss on the top of his head.

"You did such a good job!" He praised. "Did you like it?"

Kurt grinned and nodded. "It was yummy."

Daddy showed all of his teeth, even his molars. Kurt could tell that he had made him very happy and excitement welled up inside him.

"Let me get cleaned up and then we'll play a game. Would you like some juice?" He asked as he walked over to the counter and ripped open a new pack of baby wipes.

"Yes, Daddy." Kurt nodded as got to his feet and toddled over. He didn't worry about the frosting or the bowl of sprinkles. Daddy would take care of it.

Daddy prepared him a sippy cup of grape juice. "Go wash your hands, sweetie. We don't want to get anything sticky."

Kurt obediently stepped in front of the sink and ran his hands under the water, taking extra time to pump a large enough pool of soap into his hand to blow bubbles. Daddy took Kurt's distraction as an opportunity to clean himself up and readjust his pants. Once he was sanitized, he grabbed the sippy cup and headed towards the couch. "You coming?"

Sebastian stepped out of the kitchen with a spreader knife in his hand. He was wearing a blue Cookie Monster apron, something Jeff and Nick insisted he wear if he was going to use the kitchen supplies. He stalked forward into the living room and stood right in front of the TV screen, making Trent whine.

"Stooop! Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is on!" The pudgy boy protested.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Chill, it's a rerun." He turned to Jeff. "Where did you put the frosting?"

"What?" Jeff asked, not even looking up from his laptop.

"The frosting? You know, that little blue jar of white stuff we got from the dessert aisle last week?" Sebastian huffed.

"I could go without the sarcasm, mister, and it should be in the pantry where I put it." Jeff replied.

"Well it's not there." Jeff replied.

Sebastian threw his hands up. "How the hell-

"Sebastian." Jeff warned.

"How am I supposed to make a cake for Daddy's birthday without frosting?" Sebastian repeated, irritation creeping into his voice.

"Just make some."

"Oh yeah, why don't I just walk six miles to the store and buy frosting ingredients with money I don't have." Sebastian responded.

"Sarcasm." Jeff repeated tensely.

Sebastian sighed. "Well can you run to the store and get more frosting?"

"Do you really need it right now? Can't it wait?" Jeff asked.

"I'm not giving Daddy a cake without frosting on it." Sebastian said in a tone that hinted at a possible tantrum if he didn't get what he wanted.

"Well I can't leave you and Trent here alone." Jeff replied. "And Nick's working late."

"Just ask Blaine to watch us." He shrugged.

"Blaine and Kurt are working on their relationship." Jeff told him pointedly.

Sebastian bit back a smile at that. Stupid babies.

"Hey, just because you didn't start out like them, doesn't give you the right to laugh." The blond scolded lightly.

"Whatever, just get me some frosting, please?"

"Who's going to watch you?" Jeff insisted on knowing.

"I don't know, just call Santana or something." Sebastian shrugged.

"Santana? After she pulled that stunt with the hard lemonade? I don't think so."

Sebastian slumped his shoulders. "That was one time and I had bumped my head. She was just trying to make me feel better."

"Then she gives you baby aspirin, not alcohol."

The younger man rolled his eyes. "Well I promise I won't accept any alcohol from her. Can we please just call her? You'll only be gone a minute."

"No."

Sebastian crossed his arms over his chest and gave Jeff a look.

"No means no, Sebastian." Jeff said sternly. Not a second after he'd finished talking, Sebastian stepped forward and plopped onto the floor on his padded bottom. His eyes quickly filled with tears and his face flushed deep red as the first bawl ripped from his throat.

Jeff sighed and set down his laptop. "Come on, Sebastian, don't do this." Trent had officially stopped watching Mickey Mouse, as the show in front of him proved to be much more interesting. He watched Jeff rise from his chair and walk over, scooping Sebastian into his arms.

"Come on, Bassy." Jeff bounced him on his hip and rubbed his back, urging him to calm down. "You can just give Nick the cake tomorrow."

"Daddy's birthday is today!" Sebastian wailed. "I want it today!"

"But Nick won't mind…" Jeff tried.

"Daddy cake t'day!" Sebastian sobbed.

Jeff shut his eyes and sighed. While he hadn't taken much effort to get to know Sebastian over the years, he did know that Sebastian had always insisted on never succumbing to baby talk. He might have been faking a moment ago, but now he was truly upset.

"Fine, I'll give Auntie Tana a call." Jeff sighed. "Just calm down, alright?"

Sebastian hiccupped, his chest hitching with each released breath. Jeff set him on the couch next to Trent and headed for the kitchen phone.

Trent smiled. "It's okay Bassy." He leaned over and tried to hug him, but Sebastian held up his hand. "Don't touch me." He murmured, making his "brother" frown. He had been too slow. Whenever Sebastian was upset, there was a miniscule moment of time when Sebastian would allow cuddling, but Trent had missed his chance with this one.

Aunty Tana arrived in mere minutes with Brittany hanging onto her skirt. As usual she wore her clothing in Dom fashion with leather boots and tight, black skirts. Brittany, on the other hand, looked like a cream puff, with her flouncy pink dress and bright red hair bow. Her pretty blonde hair was tied into a high pony. Aunty Tana always kept her at the front of fashion.

"You can all relax, I'm here." Aunty Tana smirked.

Sebastian visibly calmed, as he always did when Santana was around. When Nick and Sebastian first started their lives together, Nick had encouraged his partner to spend time with her regularly. He had said he felt it was important for Sebastian to have someone who understood his experiences the way Santana did, though Jeff didn't quite agree with that. Jeff just thought Santana was a bad influence that reignited Sebastian's old Dom attitude.

"Okay, I'll be gone for fifteen minutes, tops." Jeff said as he gathered his keys and wallet. He seized Trent's head and gave him a big smooch. "I'll be back soon, baby. Be good." As he walked past Sebastian, he ruffled his hair. "No giggle juice, Santana." Jeff warned before giving one last wave and heading out.

Aunty Tana locked the door and turned to face them with a smirk on her face. Trent, who was not very partial to a mommy who wore leather, seemed to shrink into the couch a little and stare intently at Mickey Mouse. Sebastian on the other hand immediately rose from his seat to greet them.

"Hey, Britt." He greeted the blonde.

"Hey Bassy." She smiled, hugging Lord Tubbington to her chest. That cat seemed to look more worn each time he saw it.

"Kurt left his Barbie cruise ship over here. It's by the toy chest if you want to play with it." Sebastian told her. He didn't have to repeat himself. Brittany had already run off.

With the other two entertained, Sebastian and Santana headed into the kitchen.

"Nice cake." She smiled, glancing over at the two yellow disks that were propped up on a porcelain plate.

"It'd be nicer if we had some frosting to put on it." He commented.

"Don't be a brat, Jeff's getting you some as we speak." Santana replied as she sat down at the kitchen table. "How are things with him? What's it been, like three, four weeks since Nick's 'therapy' session?"

"It's better." Sebastian shrugged, removing the apron and slumping down into a chair. "We haven't yelled at each other in like, five days. That's progress."

"Well I definitely see an improvement." Santana stated. "In both of you."

"Yeah, yeah, happy ending." Sebastian rolled his eyes.

"I thought your happy ending was going home with Nick."

"A person can have more than one happy ending."

"Clearly." Santana smirked.

Sebastian opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by a sharp knocking at the door.

"I'll get it. It's probably Nick with his hands too full to unlock the door again-

Sebastian opened the door and froze, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the door knob.

Thad looked him up and down. "Sup."

"Get out of here." Sebastian snapped, as if on reflex. He felt Santana's hand on his shoulder, but didn't relax.

"What do you want?" Santana asked.

"I checked your place and the note on your door said you were here." Thad said. "You done with my order?"

Santana sighed. "Come back later, I'm babysitting." She told him, ignoring the embarrassed glare that Sebastian sent her way.

"Just run down the hall real quick. I've got plans tonight and I need the order." Thad said impatiently.

"She said no, so fuck off." Sebastian told him.

"Shut up, diaper boy. Let the adults talk." Thad brushed him off.

Santana shrugged. "I told you, I'm closed right now. Come back in thirty minutes." She turned and started back towards the kitchen and Sebastian started to close the door, but Thad barged right in and trailed after her.

"Look, bitch, I'm paying you! I just want my stuff!" He barked, making Britt and Trent snap to attention.

Sebastian turned to them. "Trent, Britt, go into the nursery and lock the door." He said calmly. "We're going to have a quiet time, okay?"

For once in his life, Trent didn't argue and took Brittany's hand. Together they disappeared down the hall while Sebastian joined the two in the kitchen.

"This is my apartment and you can't be here. Get the fuck out before I call the cops." Sebastian threatened.

"Wow, I'm shaking." Thad replied, brushing him off. "If you're not going to pay me, I want my money back."

"Look, you'll get your stupid stuff, just come back in a little bit." Santana repeated. "Get the fuck out."

Thad's face contorted and he roughly grabbed Santana's bicep, yanking her forward, but that's about as far as he got before Sebastian seized the back of his head and slammed his head down, straight onto the stacked cake.

When Jeff returned home, Sebastian, Trent, Santana, and Brittany were all huddled together on the couch watching Little Einsteins. He closed the door behind him and held up the bag. "I got your precious frosting."

"Don't need it anymore." Sebastian replied without looking away from the screen.

Jeff's eye twitched. "What?"

"I don't need the frosting anymore."

"So you made me go through all of that for nothing?" Jeff asked.

"It was a trip to the store, not a decathlon." Sebastian scoffed.

"Well what, did you find the frosting?"

"No."

"Then what?"

"We had to toss the cake. It got ruined." Santana answered.

"How?"

"Dropped it." Sebastian piped.

Jeff sighed and shook his head, wandering into the kitchen and dropping the grocery bag on the kitchen counter. He peered over at the cake, which was now crumbled in the trash and stained red. He turned back to the living room but stopped. Slowly he peered back into the garbage and studied the cake. "Sebastian?"