Chapter 13
POV of Susan Benson-Cassidy
It's been 2 years since I found Mom. We've grown very close since that day in the cemetery. I've even made peace with Kathy. Haden got convicted because of my testimony. Everyone was at the trial to give me support even Kathy. I've fallen in love with my little brother Noah. He's lucky he has Mom to care for him. I am too. Dad comes over every night. He and Mom are getting married soon. Dad forgives Mom for never telling him about me. One day a few weeks ago, Nick Amaro showed up at the precinct. Mom and I asked him to surprise Aunt Amanda. Everyone laughed at the look on her face when Nick came in. Since Kath told me about my grandmother, I now understand why Mom reacted the way she did when I told her about being in New York for 2 years before going to see her. Sometimes Mom and I sleep together in her bed. Haden may in jail and out of our lives, but he's still haunting my dreams. Mom says that I'll eventually stop dreaming about Haden. I can't wait for the wedding. Mom is letting the Stabler family come. I love them all but especially Maureen and Kath. I call Maureen "Maur." Even though Dad's still angry at Mom because she never told him about me, I promised him and Mom I'd help him understand why Mom kept me a secret for so long. We're all seeing a great therapist. She's breaking everything down for me and Mom. I love her so much. Aunt Lex and Aunt Case are helping me catch up with school. With Dr. Parker's help, I understand why Fin threw his chair across the squad room. A week after the trial, Dad surprised me with my favorite stuffed bear from when I was 5. I haven't seen Detective Benson-Cassidy since I was 7. I gave her to Mom to keep watch over her. At first, Mom thought I'd need the bear but I told her I have family now. She cried when I said that. I still wear Mom's fearlessness necklace. It helps a lot. I just hope she and Dad can work things out between themselves. They have me to help. After I watched Barba get Haden put away, I decided I might want to be a lawyer too. Mom said she'd support me in whatever I want to do. Dad and Noah have bonded. When Mom and Dad get married, Noah will become Noah Porter Benson-Cassidy. I'm happier than I have been in a long time even before Haden raped me when I was 13. The way Dr. Parker says to look at it is if he hadn't raped me, I would still be wishing for Mom's arms around me every day. Mom hugs me a lot and says she loves me. She also swears to me she never stopped looking for me. I believe her.