Chapter 6: Oh Man, Now What?

Amanda awakened sometime later and as she did so, she stretched out her arms and was expecting to find Lee next to her, but Amanda found nothing but cool sheets. "Lee?" She called out, but there was no response. Amanda sat up and glanced at the night stand; sitting there was a note. Amanda retrieved the note that read simply: I ran to pick up a few things. I'll be back shortly. Lee

Amanda grabbed Lee's shirt from the floor and put it on and then walked towards the kitchen for a glass of water. A smile spread across her face as she looked back at the bed and she recalled the passion filled morning she'd had with Lee. She returned to the bedroom to pick up their loosely discarded clothing, picking hers up and placed them on the chair. She noticed Lee's jacket on the chair and she picked it up to hang it in the closet on a hanger. As she did, she dropped it, causing something to fall from the pocket. Amanda reached down and retrieved it; and in doing so, her mouth flew wide open at the sight of the diamond inside.

/

Amanda held the box in her hand and starred it for several minutes. "Oh, my gosh!" she breathed as she starred at the sparkling diamond in her hand; the sun cascading brightly through the window casting a bright and radiant light upon the diamond. As she continued to look at the ring, she heard a noise from the front door, fearing that it was Lee, Amanda quickly placed the ring back in the coat pocket. She braced herself for the opening door but when it didn't open, Amanda quickly pulled on her jeans and shoes. She looked around until she found her jacket and purse; snatched them up then headed for the door.

Amanda was just pulling off as Lee drove up. Lee smiled her way and honked his horn, but Amanda didn't even appear to see him, the look upon her face one of pure panic. The smile Lee had upon his face quickly dissipated as he watched Amanda drive off quickly. Lee restarted his car as he pressed his hands on the Vette's horn, in hopes of stopping Amanda from heading wherever it was she was going. All sorts of thoughts were resounding in Lee's head as he kept up with Amanda's fast pace driving. Perhaps something had happened to Amanda's mother or the boys or what if Joe came back and said he wanted the boys? Lee was expecting them to be pulled over any moment. From what Lee could tell Amanda was indeed headed home.

/

Shortly, Lee pulled his car up in front of Amanda's house just seconds after her apparently, as she was still at the back door trying to get the key in the lock.

"Amanda!" Lee called out just as she was turning the key and attempting to push the door open.

Amanda stood there trying to catch her breath as she looked at the man she was so hopelessly and desperately in love with. "Lee, I—" for once, her gift of gab wasn't there, as she fought for the words to say what it was she was feeling.

"What's the matter? Something happen at the apartment or did something happen to your mother or the boys?" He noticed that she hadn't pushed the door open yet.

"No, Lee, nothing happened at the apartment…my mother and the boys are fine; they are at a rummage sell for the church."

"Well, what is it then?" When Amanda was still quiet, Lee asked. "Can we talk?" When Amanda nodded, Lee took Amanda's hand, grabbed her purse and jacket and led her to the picnic table where they sat on separate sides with Lee's hand still in Amanda's. "If it isn't the boys or your mother's Amanda then what is the matter?" Lee began slowly. "Why did you run off so quickly? I had planned to make you breakfast and for us to spend the rest of the day together. Did I do something wrong?"

Amanda simply starred at Lee; still struggling with words to describe why she had ran off.

"I knew it, it was too fast. I rushed you, Amanda, we could've waited…."

"No, Lee, no! I won't have you thinking that, I wanted, I needed what happened. It was special." She said as she squeezed his hand.

"Then Amanda, tell me what's wrong."

"Lee, I didn't mean to snoop, I wasn't trying to snoop, but I went to hang up our jacket and as I did so,"

"Oh, no!"

"The ring just fell out."

Amanda paused as she heard incessant ringing coming from within the house.

"Go ahead Amanda, maybe it's your mother, something about the boys."

Amanda quickly got up and went in the house. Lee stood and grabbed Amanda's belongings, walked to the door, but stood just outside and waited.

"Lee," Amanda called but then stopped as she realized that he was just by the door. "Here, come on in. I can make us some coffee."

"Who was that on the phone?" Lee asked as they sat down.
"It was a neighbor looking for my mother. Lee, I want to explain, but I'm so hungry, let me at least fix some toast then I'll try to explain everything to you. Okay?"

Lee nodded, sat down and waited patiently.

When coffee and the toast were done, they sat down in an uncomfortably awkward silence. Once Amanda was done, she turned to Lee and said, "I need to explain to you about Jim Saarinen.

"Only if you want to Amanda."

"I want to. You know that Joe and I were divorced in 1982. But what you don't know is that when the children were little and Joe and I were all practical purposes separated. One day, I went to a law firm just to get some information about a divorce and that's where I met Jim Saarinen, he was an intern there. Well, anyway, we exchanged numbers for information purposes mind you, but one night, he invited me out. Mother had the boys at her place for the weekend, she hadn't moved in with us yet; Joe was still in Africa of course."

Of course, Lee thought to himself.

"Well, we had a nice dinner and then he invited me up to his place for a few drinks and well Lee, I'm sure you can guess the rest."

"Amanda, I don't think any differently of you because of what you've told me, you are human after all."

"But Lee, you don't see, how could I go up there with him knowing that I was still married to Joe and then that he and I had a you know…a thing...just one night but a thing nonetheless?"

"Well, Amanda, I know you," Lee held on tight to her hands, "you must've felt as though things were over between you and Joe even if there wasn't some paper that said it was over. Especially for you to go to another man's apartment."

"But Lee what if you and I were to get married and things didn't work out?"

"Like I told you before, we are two different people, we would work at things and make sure we made it work. We are older and wiser and I think we are more vested than you and Joe, particularly Joe, ever was."

"I love you, I just don't know if I'm ready. I'm so so very afraid of screwing up another marriage. I'm afraid of hurting the boys, of getting and being hurt."

"Amanda, I can give you time. I've waited this long for you, I can wait a little while longer."

"But Lee, I won't put you through that. I don't want you to get your hopes up too high."

"But don't I have any say in this?"

"Maybe we better end this day and talk about it later. Suddenly I'm tired," she said and stood up.

"Amanda, I've waited way too long to find you and then it took me forever to realize and admit how I felt; so you go ahead and think about things; but I'm not going anywhere," he kissed her lightly on her cheek. "I'll see you Monday!"

Lee walked out and left Amanda standing there looking on behind him.