"Baby?"
"Yeah?"
"Would you be really upset if we don't go to Jade's Halloween party on Friday?"
I look up at you, not stopping from the foot massage I'm currently giving you. You look bashful admitting it, but I can tell you're tired. We just entered the second trimester of your pregnancy and you're trying to recover from the crazy bouts of morning sickness you had pretty much all the time. Morning sickness is so not exclusive to mornings.
"Not at all, B."
"Are you sure? Because I know how excited you were about your costume and finally getting out and if you really want to go we can still go, I'll rally."
I smile at your rambling. You're so cute when you ramble. "I'm totally sure, Britt-Britt. What my baby mama wants, my baby mama gets."
"Saaaannnn…" you blush. You always blush when I call you my baby mama. It's adorable.
"Listen, I know how shitty you've been feeling and I know you're still exhausted even though you try to lie and tell me you're fine."
"I don't lie-"
"Britt, you totally try to convince me that you're not tired and then two seconds later I see you trying to stifle a yawn, and about twenty minutes after that you're usually passed out."
You look a little depressed, knowing that I'm right.
"It's ok, B. You're growing a baby, our baby. I'm glad you want to take it easy, I'm glad you're catching up on sleep." I lean over and kiss you tenderly, my hand resting softly on your belly. I haven't been able to articulate how in awe I am of you and the fact that you're carrying my baby.
"You're just happy you don't have to fight with me for the remote anymore."
I nod my head, flashing you my smile, "Also that."
I go back to your foot rub, hearing you practically purr at me. I've always loved pampering you and spoiling you just because but now, now that you're carrying our baby, it's so much different. I'm so, so, so unbelievably in love with you, I want to do everything I can to make this experience easier for you, as easy as it can be to grow a human and push it out of a very tiny hole.
Lately, the nausea has started to let up a little bit and you haven't been sick as much as you were during the first trimester, which is a blessing. Seeing you so sick like that for so long, every day, pretty much after every meal, was trying on both of us. There is absolutely nothing you can do when the person you love is puking their guts up. I know it was hard for you to go through it and to watch me feel helpless.
Baby, I hate seeing you like that. I need to rally for when the actual labor happens.
But, a couple of weeks ago you started noticing that you felt better. Not as sick to your stomach, actually hungry and not just swallowing small bites of food with a grimace on your face because I made you eat something, and you've been mostly keeping things down.
The other thing I've noticed, the funny thing, is that your cravings have started to surface. I'm not sure if you've picked up on it yet or not, still too concerned with the sometimes barfing and the trying to catch up at work, but they are definitely a presence in our marriage now. Like your exponentially increased love of Dots. I'm so glad Halloween candy is out because I feel like I haven't been able to leave the house without you asking for more for weeks now. And bright and early on November 1st, I will be hitting every store in the neighborhood stocking up on half priced bags of those little, annoying, yellow boxes I've been finding all over the house.
On the plus side, baby, your kisses are sweeter than usual.
On Friday morning you wake me up with your kisses. Soft pecks all over my face until you break me and I giggle, and then soft kisses all over my lips. I will never, ever, get tired of your kisses. I can tell you feel better, because your mouth tastes like morning, which means you didn't wake up to run to the bathroom and get sick.
My heart warms at the thought.
"I can't wait to stay in and snuggle with you tonight, S."
"Mmm," I hum into another kiss, my hand tangling in your blonde hair as it cascades down around us, "Me either, B."
You kiss me a few more times before you reluctantly slide out of bed to change before work. I get up too heading to the kitchen to make you breakfast. You've been able to stomach more than just a piece of toast for the past few days and I know you're happy about that. Your eyes always so telling when it comes to your moods and feelings aren't that blue-grey color anymore, the shade that tells me when you're sad or when you don't feel well. No now, now they are that brilliant hue that I love so, so much.
You keep breakfast down while you're still home and give me one hell of a kiss on your way out the door and I'm so glad we're not going out tonight. You seem extra happy and extra snuggly today, something that has been missing from you, my normally bubbly wife, for the past few months. I can't wait to soak it all up, not willing to share it with anyone else. I've always been a little bit selfish.
I understand why you don't want to go tonight and I kind of feel a little bit bad about bringing it up as an option last month. Besides the not feeling well, I know you weren't pleased with your costume. You haven't been feeling anything other than icky pretty much since the second week we found out about the baby. You say you feel bloated and don't feel sexy at all, even though I've found you even more attractive than usual. Every time I look at you I feel this swell in my heart, in my soul, in my being for you. You and this amazing thing you're doing. This amazing thing we're doing.
You text me throughout the day when you're not dancing and I can tell that you are still in a great mood and I'm looking forward to slumming it on the couch with you tonight more than ever. Maybe we'll even have sex again tonight, something that's slowly been coming back into our life.
When I open the door after picking up the dinner you requested on my way home, I find you sitting on the couch, your feet up on the coffee table and your hands around your belly. Baby, you're glowing. Your eyes are closed and I don't know if you're asleep or just meditating, but I can't take my eyes off you.
You open your eyes and send me a silent question and I can feel myself blush, "I'm just admiring the view, babe."
The smile that spreads on your face makes my breath hitch. Yes, you're glowing, baby.
"Is that dinner? I'm starving." You hop up to grab the takeout bag and bounce back to the couch. I laugh at your antics, loving that you're goofing around. I grab some plates and forks and a bottle of sparkling water for us to share and join you on the couch where you look like you're going to dive in fast first and eat without utensils. "Oh, thank god…" you snatch a fork out of my hand and start stuffing your face. I laugh again and settle in, enjoying how much you're enjoying food again. You grab the remote and turn on It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown and I know, in my bones, that you are feeling 5000% better now.
You don't fight me when I get up to clean up dinner. Feeling better or not, you're still exhausted. You're spread out on the couch fighting a yawn when I come back and it's so, so cute. "Hey, baby I have a surprise for you."
Your head perks up, "A surprise? What kind of surprise?"
"You have to say trick or treat first, and then maybe I'll give it to you."
"Oh really?" I don't miss the way your voice lowers.
"Yup, thems the rules on Halloween."
You sit up, a sparkle in your eyes. "Ok…Trick or treat…"
I walk over to you and kiss your lips before giving you the two bags of Dots I have hiding behind my back. And you squeal. You actually squeal with delight right in my ear. "How did you know, S?"
"B, you've been asking me to get you Dots pretty much every time I leave the house. I'm pretty sure everyone around here that sells candy thinks I'm crazy."
"I do?"
I kiss the question off your lips, "You do. Welcome to pregnancy cravings, baby."
"Well, I can think of something else I'm craving right now, too." Your eyes turn shades darker and you pull me down on top of you, Dots thrown on the floor. You maneuver us so I'm underneath you on the couch, your body covering mine, your breath husky with want.
"Trick or treat, Santana?"
A/N: Thank you again for all the love and support! Your reviews/faves/follows all brighten my day! I was trying to plan a fun Halloween chapter where they had sexy costumes and went to a party, but this is what came out instead. Enjoy the weekend everybody! Drink good drinks and make good choices. Or don't ;)