Chapter 18
The next two weeks passed in a blur. Well,... they did for Daryl, but not for Bay. The day after their special little birthday celebration, she started feeling very tired and physically exhausted. Both of them thought that it might be a side effect of the pot and their sexual activities, which of course, made Daryl feel like an ass for talking her into it. Bay spent almost two hours convincing him, that she was not blaming him and that it had been totally worth it, before he stopped apologizing. On the day after that it turned out, that Daryl really wasn't to blame, because overnight Bay developed a sore throat and a heavily clogged up nose. On the third day her tonsils swelled up and her teeth hurt from the sinus infection she now had, and that made it official: she had the flu. Daryl knew it was bad, when Bay voluntarily called in sick to work and stayed home for three days, i.e. the rest of the week. Even after a whole week, she was still coughing and sneezing and her voice was unrecognizable and often failed to work, but she went back to work with her bag full of meds and a thermos full of chicken soup Daryl had made for her with a few instructions from her. He was great at playing nurse, but for the most part Bay just wanted him to keep his distance, so he wouldn't get sick himself. She was surprised that he didn't even have the sniffles and she was convinced that he must have some kind of super strong immune system. He tried to convince her that he would stay fine, but Bay was very strict about it and he was not allowed to kiss her. Not just because of the germs, but also because she felt utterly disgusting and repulsive with her red, runny nose, bloodshot eyes and rough, hoarse voice. The only time he was allowed to hold her was, when they took a bath with Epsom salt, because it was supposed to help with the flu just as much as with the back pain she used to have. He had soaked up every single second she had spent cuddled into his chest, but at the same time his heart had hurt like crazy when she had shed a couple of tears because she had been feeling so weak and sick. After the first week of her being sick, he suddenly stopped taking baths with her, though. It had Bay wondering, but she never asked, because after all, she had asked him to keep his distance so he wouldn't get sick. What she didn't know was, that Daryl had his reasons not to get in the bathtub with her, but it wasn't anything bad and she would find out soon.
It took her a whole two weeks to recover and today was the first day she had been able to sleep through the night without coughing, which left her with more energy and in a better mood. Just in time, it seemed, because not very long into her shift at Willie's convenience store, Merle showed up. She was surprised, she had almost forgotten about him again, because he hadn't shown his face ever since her birthday and Daryl had started relaxing again and it had made her forget about the weird dynamic the brothers seemed to share.
"Mornin' Chickadee." he greeted her with his usual grin upon entering the store.
"Hey Merle. How's it going?" she replied with a polite smile.
"Good. Good. How's things with you two lovebirds? Darylina treatin' ya right?"
"Don't call him that, Merle. It's mean." Bay admonished him gently. "He is very much a man."
"Is he now?" Merle's grin widened, if that was even possible. "And what exactly makes ya say that? Come on, give me details, don't be shy."
"I think the details of how your brother takes care of me, best remain private and between me and him. Just know that he couldn't be a better man if he tried."
"You got it bad! Jus' like him." Merle laughed and shook his head. "Enjoy it while ya can. From what I know this puppy love shit don't ever last long. One of y'all's gon' get fed up soon enough. Bet as soon as it turns real serious, mah little brother's gonna chicken out and run for the hills, Chickadee. You'd do better to find a real man who can handle this stuff. And that ain't Daryl, girly... as much as I hate to tell ya that. I mean, yer sweet 'nd all,... Wouldn't mind havin' ya around for the long haul, but that just ain't the Dixon way."
Her blood turned to ice, starting from the tip of her toes and slowly making it's way up. She literally felt frozen in place, because even her fingers got so cold and stiff, that she wasn't able to move them. The usually warm look in her eyes turned into a frosty glare and she wanted to slap the smug grin off of Merle Dixon's face. She swallowed hard and was at a loss for words, but that didn't matter, because Merle wasn't quite done yet.
"Awwww, ya ain't mad at me for speaking the truth, now are ya, Miss Bayanne? That ain't the church way!" he chuckled while he picked out some chewing gum from the small display on the counter. "Relax, I'm all for you crazy kids getting it on... but ya gotta know what yer getting yerself into, Missy. Then again, maybe I'm wrong, maybe y'all last forever. Only time will tell." he reached into his pocket and slapped down a dollar bill on the counter a moment later. "Keep the change. The way I see it, it stays in the family. Am I right?" When Bay continued to give him an icy stare, Merle leaned forward, supporting himself on his forearms on the counter. "Come on, Chickadee. Don't look at me like that. I'm just pullin' yer leg a little. If ya wanna be family, ya gotta get used to it."
"If you want me to be family, then you will have to get used to the fact that I don't think that you're particularly funny." Bay shot back.
"Ha!" Merle barked out a laugh. "I knew there was a reason I liked ya. Feisty little one, aren't ya? Not afraid ta talk back. You got guts, I respect that, girly, but I think ya got it wrong. I don't 'want' ya to be family,... that would be my brother who wants that. I ain't got no problem with that, though. He could have done way worse, gotta admit that. You definitely share some Dixon traits."
Their talk was briefly interrupted by another costumer wanting to pay for his items. Merle studied Bay while she was busy, his eyes traveling down and eying the visible scar on her cleavage. He felt his temper flare up when he thought about what Daryl had told him. There were a lot of bad things Merle had done over the years, but physically hurting a woman wasn't one of them and wouldn't ever be one of the things he would do. The cries and pleas of his hurting momma were burnt into his memory and haunted him in his dreams to this day. He still saw her kneeling on the floor, cradling and protecting her pregnant belly, pleading for Will not to hurt her little boys while he beat both of them in a drunken rage and threatened to stab her in the belly to keep another greedy little bastard from eating his damn English Muffins. Merle didn't know if Bayanne's parents had ever hit her, but he knew that they had been druggies and had left her to her own devices. One of the things they had in common. Like he'd said, he did respect her, she was a nice enough girl, but he was pretty sure that she would end up getting hurt by his little brother. Daryl might be the sweet one of the Dixon brothers, but Merle was sure that just like himself, Daryl wasn't relationship material. It might work out for a while, but one day it would be too much to handle for his baby brother. They had never learned how to have healthy relationships with people, especially not with women and eventually their attempt at a relationship would crash and burn. He was sure of it.
"So... I hear ya convinced my brother to get a real job?" Merle asked when the other man was on his way out the store.
"No, actually. He did that all by himself. Why? Did he tell you that I wanted him to?" Bay had a hard time believing that Daryl would lie about something like that.
"Nah... just thought ya might have had a hand in that... That's what girls do, don't they? Push their men to aim higher? Want more out of life and all that bullshit?"
"I never pushed him into anything. He's gotta do what makes him happy. Who am I to decide what that is?" Bay shrugged casually, suddenly feeling like Merle was giving her the third degree. Is he making sure his brother is in good hands? My my... that would actually be kind of touching, after trying to ridicule Daryl all the time. "Wait, I'm lying." Bay remembered the time she had blown up at Daryl after he had made her head spin with his whole 'hot-and-then-cold'-routine. "I told him to make up his mind about what he wanted once. I guess it might have been considered pushy. But other than that? He is old enough to make his own decisions and deal with the consequences."
"You got big plans for yourself from what I hear... College to be a damn shrink, huh? Lemme ask ya somethin'. In case ya come up with the cash and get your fancy degrees and everything... How's Daryl gonna fit into all that? You wanna be the breadwinner? Make him your pretty little housewife to come back to after ya dealt with the nut jobs?"
Bay narrowed her eyes and stared at Merle with her head tilted to the side, and for the first time in his life, Merle felt like he was the insect under the microscope she was studying with interest. He would never admit it, but it made him nervous. "What? Trying ta analyze me now?" he let out a little laugh and shifted in his spot.
"Maybe..." Bay muttered with a frown. "Actually, I'm trying to figure out why you seem to be so concerned that I might want to emasculate your brother, when it's you who calls him Darylina, a blonde little slut and a housewife. I'm wondering why you feel the need to ridicule him all the time, especially in front of his girlfriend. I assume that you know exactly how humiliating that is, which means that you do it on purpose. Now, why would you question me like that about my intentions, when you are actually the one who keeps humiliating, hurting and abandoning him?"
Merle was starting to feel uncomfortable under Bay's intent gaze and he didn't like the direction the conversation had taken at all. His purpose had been to find out more about her and about where she stood where Daryl was concerned, and not for her to pick him apart. "You don't know nothing about us, Chickadee. Ain't never done no such thing to family."
"You really believe that, don't you?" Bay kept her expression neutral, but on the inside she was scoffing. Merle Dixon might just be one of the most delusional and selfish people she had ever met. She was starting to see why everybody was bent out of shape about his return to Dalton. Merle liked to ruffle feathers for fun, but Bay wouldn't let him get under her skin. She had too much experience with drug addicts and their little games. After all, she had lived with two of them for about 6 years. It had destroyed her at first when her parents had gone psycho on her. It had taken Mamaw Eva two long years to teach her granddaughter to rise above it and not to let their games and drug rages get to her, and that it was the drugs messing with their heads, and that deep down, underneath their drug-induced hazes, they still loved her. She was starting to see the same pattern here. Merle cared about Daryl, but he was too selfish to put his little brother ahead of himself and protect him, but he expected Daryl to always put him, Merle, first. Yeah... now I see it. Merle is the most important person to Merle, yet he still thinks he's done right by Daryl. Guess again, buddy. Because of you leaving, he had to sleep in his car for weeks in the first place. "What are you afraid of, Merle? That he will abandon you for the first time in both of your lives? For me? If that's the case, making fun of him is not exactly the smartest course of action."
"Careful, Miss Bay... nobody likes a know-it-all. Nobody likes a nosy bitch, neither." Merle snarled in a low voice while he angrily clenched his fists.
Gotcha. 'Nice' to meet the true face of Merle Dixon. You're not as hard to figure out as you might think.
"You better stop makin' bullshit assumptions while I still like ya, girly." Merle threatened, but it was a weak threat. She had hit him where it hurts and they both knew it. Merle had to admit that this round went to Bayanne.
"Oh I better stop talking then. I wouldn't want to get on your bad side. That would make family get-togethers so awkward and uncomfortable." she smirked and looked up at him as innocently as possible with her big, pretty eyes. They stared at each other in silence for a moment, before Merle cracked up slightly and shook his head.
"You really got some balls, Chickadee. I like and hate it at the same time."
"Believe it or not, Merle, but we are on the same side. We both care about Daryl... I guess that's our common ground."
"Might be." Merle rubbed his chin as he gave her the up-down with his eyes and therefore returned to his slightly sleazy ways. Really too bad she ain't older. Gotta be a wildcat in the sack. Meeoow motherfucker. His trade mark grin returned and he grabbed his gum and shoved it in his pocket and finally turned to leave the store. "You have a great day, Miss Bayanne. Give ma best to ma brother."
"Good day to you Merle." Bay smiled overly polite. Suddenly Bay realized that she and Daryl had even more in common than she'd thought. Daryl had lived with Merle and his antics just as long as she had lived with her parents and their antics. She shouldn't have been surprised at all at Daryl's high-strung demeanor. She had been the same way with her parents around, which meant that she should have figured the whole thing out sooner. At least she knew that she would be able to handle Merle and that she would hopefully be able to teach Daryl to not let Merle get to him, the same way her grandma had taught her. She only hoped that it wouldn't take her two years, too. Somehow she felt that Merle was able to do a lot more damage than her parents ever had.
A couple of days later Bay and Daryl joined their friends for a day of fun at Farmer's Lake. Daryl had been reluctant to go, but he hadn't been able to say no to Bay's begging and her puppy dog eyes. He thought that she shouldn't be swimming and running around in a bikini yet, after just having started to feel better, but Bay was convinced that it was just what she needed. She hadn't mentioned her encounter with Merle to Daryl. She knew that it would just upset him and make him tense again and she wanted to avoid that at all costs, especially after the shitty two weeks they'd had with her being sick and all.
Daryl soon thought that it had been very smart of him to say yes to this trip to the lake, because now him, Sam, Jason and Pete were able to stretch out in the lush green grass and watch their girlfriends play volleyball in their bikinis. They were grinning like idiots at all the bouncing and jiggling that was going on, regretting that they didn't have a video camera. Good for them that young men their age had very good memories where these things were concerned. That the girls hugged and jumped around in victory after every point would sure fuel some new fantasies for the small group of men.
Daryl took pleasure in seeing Bay enjoy herself. After witnessing her laying in bed, exhausted and more or less silently suffering for two weeks, it was great to see her have fun and laugh and smile and be carefree. Bay sucked at volleyball, but she laughed about her own skill-lessness and still gave her all in order to try to score some points for her team. Apart from the guys ogling their girls, Bay was entertaining the whole group with her playing, even having Daryl laugh and thoroughly enjoying the show, but she really wasn't bitter about it at all, and Daryl admired her attitude. She didn't take herself too seriously and wasn't above making a little fun of herself. If it was him, he would lash out at everybody out of insecurity, before he would slink into a corner and shrink into himself and scowl at everybody, daring them to come closer and potentially loose a limb. Maybe that's why they worked so well. They were similar, but then again, they weren't. They were both complex and some of their wires just connected in the right way and sparked a wonderful, big, warm and bright fire. He had never been the kind of person to get infected by other people's happiness, but watching Bay laugh and giggle at her own horrible serves, that regularly landed in the net that was spanned in the middle between the four girls, he couldn't help but smile and laugh and be proud that he was able to call her his. I love that damn crazy girl. He knew he was no longer falling in love with her. Some time between them getting high and sexually experimental on her birthday, and her cuddling into his chest in the bathtub, seeking comfort from him during one of her weakest points, he had stopped falling and had reached his destination. He was hopelessly in love with Bayanne Moore. She owned his heart, and he gladly let her own him, because she let him own her in return. She trusted him blindly, she made him feel worthy and like a man, and she gave him a home and a family. And she did it effortlessly and selflessly, never expecting anything in return. She was the girl for him and he'd been lucky enough to get her and be with her. It was a miracle to him.
Bay wasn't sure if Daryl had fallen asleep or not, because his dark sunglasses were shielding his eyes from view, just like they were shielding them from the bright sunlight. He was stretched out on their blanket in the grass, all by himself, because the other guys had joined their girlfriends and Bay in the lake. She soon felt like the fifth wheel, while the other couples played around, so she trudged out of the water. She quickly straddled him and let her sopping wet form drop into his lap with a giggle. Daryl just grinned and let his hands run up her thighs, squeezing gently. "Ya can't sneak up on me, baby girl."
"I know. I wasn't even trying." she laughed and put her arms around his neck when he had sat up. They shared a kiss and without breaking their contact, Daryl blindly reached for her oversized t-shirt that she had dropped on the blanket before going in the water.
"Here... put it on... don't need ya to get sick again." he mumbled against her lips.
"No chance of you coming in the water with me?" she grinned as she took the shirt out of his hand.
"Ain't takin' ma shirt off, ya know why."
"You don't have to. I'm sure your shirt won't disintegrate if it comes in contact with water." She teased him gently, earning herself a little smack on the butt.
"Smartass!"
"Come on..." she coaxed him and kept giving him little kisses between words. "We can go over to that little landing stage over there. Hide out behind it."
"And get run over and killed by a damn boat? Nah..."
There weren't really any boats, especially not ones that would not see you and run you over, therefore it was clear that Daryl didn't want to go into the water at all. Bay was a bit disappointed. She loved the water and she would have loved to have a good time with him, just like the other couples, however, Daryl just wasn't going for it and she would have to live with it. She pulled back a little and put her shirt on. "Alright." she murmured, trying to keep the disappointment out of her voice.
Daryl distracted her by kissing her again, and Bay gladly let herself get distracted after her self-imposed ban on kissing for the last two weeks. They forgot everything around them, until the others came back to their own towels and blankets that were located about three feet away, to allow the couples a tiny bit of privacy, and Daryl started pushing Bay off of him. "What's wrong?" she asked in a near whisper with a frown when he tried to make it look like they were good buddies instead of a couple.
"Nothing." he shrugged. "Jus' don't need an audience."
"You do realize that they know that we're together, right? And that they were able to see us from the water?" Bay asked him with a slightly incredulous expression on her face. Daryl started chewing on his lip nervously. She had a point, he hadn't even thought about that. "Also, what makes you think they would spend their time watching us? They are busy doing their own things." When he didn't reply she huffed quietly. "Fine... if you're ashamed of me... " This time the disappointment was crystal clear in her voice, and Daryl felt like an ass for causing it.
"Hey, come one... don't be that way." he sighed and carefully pulled her back to straddle his lap again. "Just ain't used to this..."
"They are not gonna watch us any more than we watch them... and how often do we watch them kiss?" Bay asked, making Daryl chuckle quietly.
"Only as long as it takes for us to turn our heads before we start throwing up." he was laughing, but he was still very serious. He liked watching porn, but he'd never liked watching his friends make out with their girls. He hadn't thought about them probably feeling the same way about watching him and Bay.
"Exactly." she smiled and put her arms back around his neck. "Also... I thought Daryl Dixon wasn't afraid of anything?" she grinned teasingly. "It's a little weird for me, too, you know? People seeing us kiss? But I don't care about them taking a peek. I only care about you and about being with you. I love kissing you too much to stop doing it just because our friends are around. It shouldn't matter who might or might not be watching." she explained quietly. "Kiss me, Daryl. Don't think about them. Think about me. Think about us." she was challenging him, hoping that he would be one of those typical rednecks that never backed down from a challenge. She wanted a normal relationship with him, she didn't want to hide and sneak around. Everybody knew they were an item, so why make a big deal out of it and hide every time they wanted to kiss? Bay didn't want to hide, she wanted to celebrate what they had and she didn't mind others seeing how happy he made her feel. She never asked anything of him, but this was something she wanted him to do for her. She wanted him to overcome that feeling of shame and be openly proud of what they shared and not give her the feeling like he was ashamed to be seen with her.
Daryl's eyes were still hidden by the sunglasses, but Bay was able to tell that his gaze flicked over to their friends. She felt more disappointment quell up inside of her and was ready to get off his lap again, in order to get back into the water and try to get a clear head, but Daryl's hand on the back of her neck stopped her, as he roughly pulled her back to him and captured her lips with his own. Bay released a joyful giggle before she melted into the kiss, gently cradling his face in her hands and soothingly stroking her thumbs back and forth over his cheekbones, trying to ease his nervousness a little. It took a minute, but by the time Bay clung to his shoulders as his tongue made love to her mouth, he really forgot everything else around them and was only focused on her, just like it should be. He didn't notice, that the others did sneak a couple of looks at them, just out of curiosity, because they hadn't seen the couple act too couple-y so far, and they had been together for over a month by now.
"They look so good together." Erin smiled in a whisper. "They make a hot couple, don't you think?"
"If you say so." Sam snickered. Now that Bay and Daryl had finally gotten together, he didn't spend too much time thinking about them anymore, unlike his girlfriend. That's just how girls were, he figured. "Getting turned on watching them kiss?" Sam grinned while he slid his big hands on Erin's firm, round butt and gave it a good squeeze.
"Maybe a little." Erin laughed jokingly. "They are beautiful and it looks like Daryl's a pretty good kisser. Nice tongue action."
"Hey! Whatchu paying attention to his tongue for, dirty girl?" Sam narrowed his eyes at her in mock-jealousy and slapped her ass lightly.
"Just happened. Wanna get back in the water?" she wriggled her eyebrows, while she ground her pelvis against his as inconspicuously as possible.
"Definitely." he grinned and gave her a little kiss before they got up and hurriedly made their way into the lake water, swimming a little further out than before, so nobody would see too clearly what they would be doing out there.
Daryl and Bay were blissfully unaware of anything going on around them. Daryl had noticed that nobody paid them any mind (at least that's what he believed now, not having noticed Erin and Sam watching them for a minute), so by now they were innocently kissing like it was going out of style tomorrow, while Jason and Pete were doing the same with their girlfriends until it was time to go back home.
"Any chance of you getting in the water with me here? In our home? Where it's just the two of us? It's been a while..." Bay asked smilingly when they were back at their apartment.
"Yeah." Daryl nodded with a little smile. "Just... ummm,.." he trailed off, not knowing what to say.
Bay looked at him questioningly while she filled two glasses with water. She set the bottle down on the counter and sighed. "I knew there was something wrong. I've felt it for days..."
"Wrong? Nothing's wrong, Bay." Daryl smiled reassuringly. "Seriously. There's something you don't know yet, though... Ain't bad, I promise." he quickly added when a nervous expression passed over her features.
"What?" Bay still felt very nervous. As much as she enjoyed being with him, the happiness came with the price of always being a bit scared that he might grow tired of her. She hadn't wanted to let Merle get under her skin, but him telling her that Daryl might run for the hills definitely hadn't helped.
Daryl chewed on his bottom lip while he walked over to her. She expected him to wrap his arms around her, but he stopped before he got too close, leaving about two feet of space between them. He gathered the hem of his black sleeveless t-shirt in his hands and pulled it up. Bay watched him take it off with a frown on her face, as she was utterly puzzled by his behavior. She was just about to ask him what he was doing and what in the hell it was that she didn't know yet, when her eyes noticed something different about him. It took her a moment to realize what it was, but when she did, a gasp escaped her and tears started welling up in her eyes.
Bayanne.
Her name was now adorning the left side of Daryl's chest just above his nipple... right on top of his heart. Big letters, written with black ink and in a beautiful and elegant script. He's wearing my name on his heart... Holy shit...She was speechless and relieved, because now his reluctance to take baths with her finally made sense. He wanted it to heal first before he would let her see it. Daryl watched her nervously as she opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, but no words would come out, she was just silently crying and staring at his chest.
"You don't hate it, do ya?" he asked with a little insecure chuckle when she just wouldn't say anything.
"No." she croaked out. Her mind was racing, just as much as her heart was. Does this mean...? You don't tattoo someone's name on your chest if you don't... love... that person... right? She was scared by that, but at the same time she felt like he was wrapping a warm and protective blanket around her, making her feel safe, sheltered and,... well,... loved. It was a weird sensation, but not an unpleasant one. It was just a little overwhelming. She seriously didn't know what the appropriate response would be to him doing this, so she just said the first thing that came to mind. "You know that's permanent, don't you?"
"That's the point..." he muttered around his thumbnail, which he had started chewing on by now. He didn't know what exactly he had expected, but it had definitely been something more ecstatic on her part. Maybe she's jus' really shocked? He watched her, almost warily, as she closed the distance between them, her eyes trained on his newest tattoo. Carefully she lifted her arm and traced the letters with her index finger softly.
"It's beautiful." she smiled quietly. "You are crazy..."
Crazy 'bout you. He smiled and slowly wrapped his arms around her to pull her closer. "Nah, ain't crazy. This is actually the first one I got stone cold sober."
What does it mean? Bay wanted to ask, but she didn't dare. They were doing fine without putting any more labels on their relationship and she wasn't ready to hear him say out loud that he might love her. Something about it just scared the living daylights out of her. Right now they were living in their own little dream world. Admitting feelings out loud would make it real and she was not ready to let go of their dream world yet. Love destroys. She wasn't ready to risk any damage to what they had right now. "Is that a yes on taking a shower with me?" she smiled and tried to distract herself from her confusing feelings.
"Yeah. Guess that can be arranged now." Daryl was smiling, but deep deep down he felt the slightest pang of disappointment at her reaction. She liked it and she was touched, sure, but something felt off. Unfortunately he wasn't able to put his finger on it. Maybe it was just his imagination, too. He tried to shake it off and focused on other things, like her wet body standing under the hot spray of the shower.
I'm sorry for the cliffhanger. I wanted to put the smut in this chapter as well, but I just don't know if I will get to write it before Tuesday or Wednesday, and I didn't want to keep you guys waiting that long, so I split the chapter into two parts. We will start the next one right where this one left off, i.e. smut.
Thank you for reading!
Thank you for all the support. There's a lot going on right now, which takes up a lot of time. I hope after next week things will go back to normal and I will be back to my regular update schedule. No promises, though. Real life is tough these days.
Thank you for all the lovely reviews. Please forgive me for not responding, I feel horrible about it, but I literally don't have time. I apologize profusely for not thanking all of you personally these days. Like I said, I hope all that will be back to normal soon. Thank you so sososososososo much guys!