Hello dear readers! So I'm back! Yay! NanoWri is over and I finished. It's one of the reason it took so long to get into writing. I finished a novel! I still can't believe it. And I'd like to say that it is not utter crap, but well...revisions, revisions, revisions. I was able to play Mass Effect for a little while the other day. It was great to play a video game again. Anywho, this chapter was fun to write and loooong. Once I started writing I couldn't stop. I have a few other chapters that need some work and more added to them that I will hopefully be posting this week. But for now here it is...Chapter 30!

PE

"The Gang's All Here"

Shepard stood just outside the lounge doors. Music drifted from the other side of the doors. Faint guitar with a soft rhythm and drum beat, nothing with too much bass. She was uncertain about joining the others in a poker game, it was more that she was tired. She hadn't sleep well the pass few nights. Her dreams the main source of her duress. Her guilt over leaving Earth behind manifested in her nightmares. She knew there was nothing she could do. Seeing the boy, she had watched playing outside her window only minutes before killed by the Reapers as she escaped safely, tortured her. She was alive and he was not. She had been given a second chance at life and he would not. Earth was counting on her. Millions of lives at stake, a poker game seemed pointless compared to that, but she had promised to meet James and Kaidan for a game before trying to get some sleep.

She had seen the looks they had been shooting her way since Thessia. Kaidan had comforted her, but he was also giving her some space, which she appreciated. James had taken a page from Kaidan's book it seemed. Besides Kaidan he was one of the few who didn't ask if she was alright. The truth was, no, no she wasn't. She was pissed. A deep anger boiled in the back of her mind. She could feel its tendrils twisting and forming around her thoughts. She wanted Kai Leng and she wanted him dead. She had never truly wanted someone dead before. Even Saren she hadn't wanted dead. Hell, in the end she and tried to talk him down. But Kai Leng, he was a dead man. If she didn't get him, one of her crew would.

"Hey, Lola, you plannin' on staying outside the door all night or you comin' in?" James said cutting through her thoughts. She flinched despite her best effort not to.

The music was louder, but not by much and she could now hear voices. Kaidan's soft baritone laugh mixed with Tali's twill and Garrus' gruff tones. Shepard blinked at James.

"You said it was only a few of us." She stated entering the lounge. Glancing around, she saw that just about everyone was here. Tali, James, Garrus, Kaidan, Liara, Dr. Chakawas, EDI, Traynor and Cortez were all present. Most of them were standing in small groups clustered together talking in excited voices. All of them had drinks in their hands.

"Well, a few are here, Lola." James grinned and gestured. "But, we decided to make it a Poker Party instead of a Poker Game." He winked and motioned for her to follow him over to the bar. Everyone she passed nodded, smiled or waved at her. She tried to the smile back, but her heart wasn't exactly in it. She had a nagging feeling in the back of her head that something strange was going on.

James walked around the bar and grabbed out two glasses and a red bottle of liquor. Shepard stepped up to the bar just as he finished pouring. He slid one in her direction. She raised an eyebrow at him as he recapped the bottle and took his glass.

"What?" He asked raising the glass to his lips he took a sip.

"What exactly is all of this, Vega?" She asked twisting the glass in her hands.

"What's it look like, Lola?" James raised an eyebrow as he took another drink.

Shepard stared at him and then sighed tracing her thumb along the rim of her drink. The song that was playing ended and another one started in the same style but not quite the same beat.

"Come on, Lola, it didn't start out this way just kinda of happened, you know. I invited Scars to join us and he in turn invited Sparks. Major talked to Doc and Blue into joining us. And well, EDI I think was just curiousity about the game in general. Oh, I invited Esteban by accident and he invited Tweaks."

"Who?"

"Uhhh..hmm…" he pointed to Traynor, "she works with the comm systems and stuff like that. Lab tech, pretty, smart and likes girls. Tweaks."

"Uh-huh, you mean, Traynor?"

He nodded and took another sip. "Yeah, Tweaks. Anyway, the gang's just about all here. Just waiting on Joker."

"Joker?"

"Yeah, he said he would show up once we were through the next relay." Shepard twitched. Two relay jumps and they were to Scantuary following Kai Leng's breadcrumb trail. Joker would be making the jump through the first mass relay here very soon. She fingered the top of her glass again. The contents were tempting and maybe they would help sleep, but her stomach churned at the thought of drinking anything. She looked down at the red fiery liquid. Red…like blood. Suddenly she didn't want to drink it at all. Maybe she was losing it. All the stress must be starting to mess with her mind.

"Commander, you feeling okay?" Shepard's head shot up and she glared at James. He sat his glass down and shook his head pointing to her drink. "You haven't touched your drink."

Shepard looked down again. Sighing she twisted the glass in her hands again. "No, just not thirsty." She forced a smile. She hoped it seemed genuine. She didn't want to disappoint him. Not at a time like this. She needed morale high and if it meant acting like she was beating through this then she would grin until her cheeks hurt. But she was tired. She couldn't ignore that. Eventually her exhaustion would catch up to her.

"Good, for a moment there you looked a little green around the gills." He picked up his drink and walked back around the bar. "I'm going to make certain everything is set up. Man, this is going to be killer, though you know, Scars wanted me to ask if we could set up a sparring ring in the armory. You know, a place to blow off steam and anxiety before a fight or something."

"You two want to start up a turian sparring ring?" Shepard asked shifting on her stool.

Vega smiled and nodded. "Yeah, you know about those?" Shepard nodded.

"Garrus told me about them on our mission to take down the Collectors. He said it was 'stress relief'." James chuckled and shook his head.

"Hell, of a way to relief stress." He continued walking not waiting to hear her response. Shepard watched him for a moment before turning back to her drink. She looked down at it again as if willing it to disappear. More laughter and pieces of conversation drifted over to her ears.

"See I'm telling you the Logic Arrest is still the best model out there."

"And I think you're just nostalgic. The Nexus has the best operating systems for multiple appilcations. As I clearly told you before, if you want a tool that can function properly under stress and multitask without the lag, then you want a Nexus."

"My tool has no problem running…"

"Okay, just for the record here we are still talking about omni-tools, correct?"

"So I heard that Javik is not what you expected him to be?"

"Yes, I did not expect Protheans to be so cold hearted and warlike."

"Well, what did you expect a peaceful and dutiful society of wise old scholars.?"

"Uhhh…yes? I did not know. Everything from my research points to the fact they could have been or should have been benevolent."

"Dear, I hate to tell you this, but most likely the cultures that looked upon the Protheans as gods wanted them to appear benevolent especially if they thought it would anger their gods. Think about it, human culture is the classic example. People use to make willing sacrifices to have their hearts cut out thinking that it could appease their 'gods' of the day."

"I guess you could be right."

"Couldn't you run a few hundred programs or something to figure out how to play poker, EDI? I mean it does seem to be the best way for you to understand the game."

"Correct, Specialist Traynor, but I would not have the experience of seeing a game played in real life. It is more the interaction with others that I'm looking forward to studying. I do not intend to play, but merely watch the reactions of the players."

"What are you watching for?"

"To see if I can spot any 'tells'."

"Tells? You mean like a twitchy left eye when someone's lying?"

"Yes,"

"Why in the world would you want to study that?"

"Jeff was curious about my capabilities."

"No, Mr. Vega, I'm not going to spar with you. Even if Shepard gives you permission to erect your little fight club."

"Ah, Esteban, why not? It'd be a great chance to keep in shape and I get to see you in action."

"Please, Mr. Vega, you just want what you think will be an easy opponent."

"Why I think? Esteban, you would be an easy opponent."

"Think what you will, Mr. Vega, but you aren't going to sucker me into a match with you. I know how many pull-ups and sit-ups you do in a day."

"Oh, so you do notice?"

"Mr. Vega, it would take a dead person not to notice. You make a show of it."

"Hey," A warm hand slipped across her lower back, a slight shock of static sparked through her at the contact. She smiled, a little grin that drifted into his bright eyes as Kaidan stepped up to stand next to her. Her smile was at least real when it came to him. He grinned back and canted his head toward her drink. "Not feeling it, huh?"

She shook her head. "Not really, no." She pushed the drink away. His hand slipped away from her then though he still stood close enough she could feel his breath tugging gently on her hair. He eyed her warily.

"You know, there's enough people wanting to play that we could…skip out." He winked at her and she chuckled at his flirtation. It was endearing and she found it refreshing.

"Maybe, but I think Vega wanted to try and butter me up a little to let him and Garrus start up a sparring arena in the armory." Shepard shifted to look over her shoulder at the people gathered in the lounge. Garrus and Tali were standing near the windows huddled close talking much like Shepard and Kaidan were hunched together. She smiled and felt a warmth blossom in her chest. They were cute together. Chakawas and Liara sat on the sofa sipping out of brandy glasses both nodding as they responded to each other's prompts. Traynor and EDI watched James and Cortez set up the poker table. Her eyes flickered back to Kaidan who was watching her.

"Vega and Garrus want a sparring ring? Well, that could certainly prove interesting."

"Garrus says it's the way turians relieve stress before battle." Shepard laughed at the remembrance of the rest of Garrus' tale. Of his conquest of his sparring partner. Kaidan's brow rose at her outburst of laughter. She waved a hand in front of her face dislodging the flashes of memory. "I'll tell you later."

The door to the room opened and Joker hobbled in. EDI moved toward him to offer assist if he wanted it, but Joker refused smiling at her though as she showed him over to the poker table.

"Well, I guess it's too late for you to back out now, Joker would never let you live it down." He stared at her seriously for a moment. "But Shepard if you really don't want to be here, they'll understand." He reached up a hand and placed it on top of hers squeezing it reassuringly.

Shepard stared at their joined hands for a breath before reluctantly pulling hers away. "I'm fine, Kaidan. Besides it's like you said, Joker would never let me live it down."

They walked over to the table were the rest of the group was gathering. Garrus sat down and Tali next to him, Joker was across from them with EDI standing behind him observing. James sat next to Joker leaving room for Cortez, then Traynor and Chakawas to his left. Two spots were left open on Joker's right. Kaidan pulled out Shepard's chair and she shot him a flirtatious smile as she sat. He winked at her and then sat next to Joker.

Joker rolled his eyes. "Okay, okay we get you two are close. Now, Kaidan, you do realize that if I don't win at least twice I'm going to think your giving me bad advice."

"Hey, you can't blame me if you suck at playing."

"Oh well, then someone should have told me that before I started taking help from you."

Shepard raised an eyebrow at Joker and then Kaidan who just shook his head. "I've been helping him with his game strategy."

"Jeff, you are aware that this game is not entirely on luck, there is amount of skill…there is even a mathematical equation that can be used to know what cards you are going to get." EDI chimed in.

Everyone abruptly stopped speaking and stared at the AI. Even Joker looked shocked. Shepard cleared her throat. "Huh, EDI? That's cheating."

"Yeah, sorry, but you can't do that. It's called counting cards. It's illegal in game play. Big guys like Vega get really upset and start smashing stuff, mostly, the cheater's face with his fist when you do that." Joker followed up.

EDI canted her head and regarded everyone present. "I do not understand. The system is all about equations and theories. Everyone plays as if it is based on chance, yet it is not. It is probability."

Traynor snorted a laugh covering her lips with a hand. Garrus and Tali shared a pointed look. Kaidan coughed stifling his own laughter, just as James sighed and crossed his massive arms over his chest. Looking as if he really was ready to smash someone in the face. "Hey, we aren't breaking this down to math. I hate math. We're just playing the game." James started shuffling the cards. While everyone else tossed their opening bids into the middle of the table.

"Then I will just observe the playing of the game." EDI stated placing her hands behind her back. James nodded and Joker looked relieved. Kaidan caught Shepard's eye and leaned toward her.

"Though Joker could use the advantage." He whispered, Shepard chuckled.

"I heard that," Joker replied his eyes narrowing.

"Hey, hey, let's not pick on the new guys…or girls." James smirked as he offered Joker to cut the deck. Joker did and James reshuffled. "Game is Texas Hold'em first round explanation to those who have no idea what I'm talkin about. Second round, we play for creds."

Shepard watched her eyes focusing on everyone round her. They smiled and laughed as they played. Joker feinted anger at his loses though truly it was more humorous than seriousness. He blamed Kaidan and Kaidan shook his head laughing. Shepard smiled throughout the game. After a while she found she didn't have to pretend, to be happy. Because at some point surrounded by her friends she found herself laughing and smiling in genuine. She wasn't certain when the transformation had happened but it had.

For a couple of hours everyone was at peace. There was no talk of Reapers, war, Earth, Pavalan, Rannoch, Thessia or Cereberus. She, Garrus, Tali, Joker and Chakawas did tell stories about some of the Normandy's form crew members from Ash to Thane. All the stories though were happy or silly times, nothing sad or forlorn crossed the room. But in the back of her mind, Shepard still had that nagging little voice that said this was only a brief respite. This could be the last time we are all together. She looked around the table. If Thessia had taught her anything it was that in nothing last forever.

Kaidan's hand found her knee under the table. A little spark of electrical current zapped both of them causing Shepard to shiver in more than surprise. He squeezed knee reassuringly and she turned her head to look at him. He leaned toward her a little. "You need a break?" He whispered.

Shepard glanced at James who was shuffling the cards again getting ready to deal. She shook her head and smiled. "Not yet, but soon. Right now I want to enjoy this moment, this time we have all together."

Kaidan smiled back, but kept is hand on her knee for the rest of the night.