Lots happened today, so this might be a longer entry for tonight. You know, I'm already kinda starting to like writing these journals. It's not exactly what I'd call fun, but it's...how should I put it, I don't mind doing these now. I mean, I guess the whole not wanting to write these kinda died off real quick and now all of a sudden it's like second nature now. Weird.

You know what it is? I think it's 'cause this journal's the only thing that I have where I can just pour in all the thoughts that I can't speak out loud. It's like this journal's the only thing that I can talk to, the real shit that's goin' on in my head that no one else around me right now'll get or understand.

Holy shit, guys, I think I just figured out the purpose of a journal. Epiphany, mind goes boom, all that good stuff. I didn't even need to blow a joint for this one.

Not that I've done any weed in my life, so it's not like I would know how that feels.

All sarcasm aside, like I said, today was a busy day. The secretarial staff and the girls' munition rounds and other weapons supplies get helied in today. Three new staff to help me out with secretary and management stuff, to be exact.

And they're all girls. Am I seriously gonna be the only guy in this entire fucking base? I can't be the only one packing the testosterone here, right? They're gonna give me some guys to come help me out with this shit, right?

Right?

'Cause if I didn't think this was kinda getting to be a joke before, I fucking do now. I'm the only guy in a huge navy base with eight other girls, and absolutely zero guys. Other than me.

Gender issues aside, I met our new staff first thing in the morning when they ferried in the supplies.

Ooyodo's my secretary for the time being. She reminds me of Fubuki, only taller and maybe a bit more grown up, no offense intended towards Fubuki. She wears glasses, so it's easy for me to differentiate her from the rest. They say glasses are serious business, after all. When I showed her around in my office, apparently she was impressed by how well I kept my documents and other papers and stuff. I mean, it wasn't anything fancy that I did. I just organized them by relevancy and by importance in manila files that I put into folder racks on the side of my desk, that's all. I have this sneaking suspicion that either Ooyodo just wants to be on my good side by complementing me, or she's just not used to having superiors who have any organizational ability. I hope it's the latter. She said she'll also take care of general communications between the base and the government, so I guess I can rely on her to take care of that. She seems the reliable kind, so I'm gonna take a risk and bank my hopes on her that she can do her job.

It's not that I'm expecting her not to do her job, but it's 'cause every other time I've entrusted someone to do their goddamn job, they never do. It's nothing against Ooyodo, but I really do wish that she'll be as reliable as she looks.

Akashi's our repair specialist, so she brought with her lots'a tools and repair materials that she'll need to patch up the girls when they get damaged or hurt which we spent a good hour or so stacking up. Unlike the others when I helped them move their belongings into their dorms, Akashi was completely chill with me helping her move the stuff into the warehouses and the repair rooms. I wasn't too sure how she'd react, seeing the reactions of the others the other day. Akashi's a lot like Samidare - unassuming, cheerful, and most importantly, works efficiently and with every intent to get the task at hand done. As an American, I can appreciate this. If there's one thing an American like me knows how do to, it's working efficiently as possible and getting shit done.

Well, that doesn't apply to all Americans, obviously, like any racial generalization or stereotype, but I certainly fall into that category.

I asked Akashi (with my subpar Japanese, mind you, and just like Samidare, she didn't shy away from my less than perfect Japanese and helped me along, thank God) how exactly she would go about repairing the girls if they were to be injured. She explained that she's like a human surgeon and doctor, able to treat any kind of wound that they would receive out in battle. As long as they can reach home base again where she can properly treat them, Akashi would be able to repair them back to full health, though, obviously, that being said, it would depend on just how bad their wounds are. Since these girls apparently don't get sick from conventional human diseases, battle wounds would be the only things that she'd have to worry about. I guess I don't have to worry about catching any sicknesses from the girls. Akashi also showed me these things called instant-repair buckets that're stored inside the crates that the heli brought in with them, and apparently they're filled with a special kind of water containing auto-repairing nanoparticles that'll fix up any wound that they come into contact with if they're poured onto a damaged ship girl. She warned me that they should only be reserved for emergency situations in which a ship girl desperately needs a way to repair a life-threatening wound and there is literally no other way to receive treatment. And even then, Akashi said it wouldn't completely heal them, only keep them alive long enough until Akashi herself could treat them directly if their wound is that bad. But the buckets can basically instantly heal any wound that was moderate to light, whatever that means.

And then, the third girl. Not even Ooyodo or Akashi knew what her goddamn name was. None of us know. What the fuck? Why is there this girl in this base without a freakin' name? She hardly ever talks, too. The only thing I ever heard her say was "yes" when I asked her if she wanted some dinner when it was time to make dinner. Apparently, accordin' to Ooyodo, she's supposed to be the "secondary secretary", which I have no fucking clue what that's supposed to mean. Ooyodo said that if I had any questions regarding my post, I ought'a go 'n ask her, but it's kinda tough to go talk to someone whose name you don't know, nobody else knows, probably the girl herself doesn't even know, for all I know. I literally asked that girl what her name was no less 'n twenty times, and every single fucking time she'd just stare back at me like I was supposed to know. By the end of it, I got so pissed off that I just started calling her "Error" 'cause, you know, it might've been an error or a mistake that she was sent here. I thought it would get her agitated enough to speak, 'cause here I am assuming that Japanese people are sensitive to insults, at least a lot more so than Americans are, but she just rolled with it, so now she won't respond to me unless I actually call out "Error".

Oh lawd, what have I done.

That girl's like a goddamn pet, now that I think about it. I decide calling her this retarded name, and now she won't respond to anything else from me. Talk about the world's greatest fuck-up.

Like, she looks like a damn elementary-school kid, what the hell is she even doing here! ? ! ! ?

Oh well. It ain't like I even have a say in the matter. I expected crazy shit to happen, and now they're happening. I mean, look, I've been through some really stressful times. But somehow, this's the most stressful, I can fucking feel it, and it's all snowballing from the fact that this girl I called "Error" 'cause I decided to be mean to her now thinks her own name is "Error". FailFish, FailFish, FailFish.

In other news, drilling started today. Since I'm not too familiar with how the drills are supposed to go with the girls, Ooyodo directed the ship girls for me while I got myself acquainted with the drills so I can start training the new ship girls when they arrive, whenever they do arrive. I watched them for a bit, drilling in the waters just off the docks, from my office. My office's got a helluva view of the harbor, so I can't complain.

After their drills were done, I began my drilling for them. As part of the contract stated in the Moebius Four Armament, the officer sent to command the ship girls (me) would drill the girls as an officer would for ground soldiers or sailors. Like I've mentioned before, this's something that normally I'm quite good at. I know how to drill men and women into becoming good soldiers. I'm not so confident if I can do the same thing to girls who aren't anywhere near looking like adults.

But I didn't let these sentiments prevent me from drilling them the same way as I would any other ordinary army or navy recruit. More like, I can't afford to. It's my fucking job. I do my fucking work, and if it's to drill middle-school girls, then so be it, even if I'm going to hell afterwards. When I started drillin' 'em, it's kinda like the feeling you get when you're on a springboard forty feet above a swimming pool, and you're about to do your first high-jump dive, and you've got that horrible gut-wrenching feeling of wondering whether you're just a massive fucking idiot for doing what you're just about to do. Take a deep breath, and just jump right in.

Focus on the job now, deal with the repercussions later. As an American, I would know all about this, wouldn't I.

As I expected, much to my dismay, the girls reacted horribly to my drilling. Clearly it wasn't something they could handle. Inazuma and Sazanami were on their knees crying their eyes out barely twenty minutes into it, and Samidare and Fubuki were clearly ready to join them too, but they managed to hang on. Only Murakumo lasted through it, but I could tell she was fighting herself to make sure she wasn't going to flip out and punch me right in the fucking dome.

Ooyodo and Akashi and Error were watching me drill them. I saw Ooyodo inching forward towards me, but Akashi held her back, shaking her head. Error simply watched. That girl's fucking creepy. Afterwards, once the drilling was done, Ooyodo came to speak with me about my drilling style. She pleaded with me to go easier on the girls. She used the same exact reason that I just mentioned a few paragraphs before, that they aren't exactly adults or know how to cope with the rigors of standard drilling in the army or the navy. I told her that as much as I would like to go easy on them, I was here to do my job as a drill instructor, and that I wouldn't treat them any differently because I expected them to be fine adults already.

You can imagine what the rest of the evening felt like in the base.

My own drill orders are still bouncing around in my fucking head.

"LEFT, RIGHT! LEFT, RIGHT! STEAAAAAAAAAA-DY! TURN! LEFT, RIGHT! LEFT, RIGHT!"

Now, I'm positively certain that Inazuma, Fubuki, and Sazanami hate the living shit out of me. And if Ooyodo and Samidare liked me somewhat, they sure as hell don't now. Murakumo's the same as ever. I guess being sarcastic and caustic helps with dealing with shitty situations, so she hasn't changed. Akashi understands my position. She knows that it's my job to drill them, even if I have to break hearts to do it, so I think she's gonna be the only one with whom I can have a decent conversation with anytime soon.

It's gonna be a really, really long while before they get their drills down perfectly. Until then, I ain't letting up. Even if I feel like the shittiest human being on Earth for reducing the girls into nothing more than miserable piles of tears, it's my fucking job.

Hey, it's still better than sending hundreds of men to their deaths.