Chapter Three

My Confused Self

It has been about four days since our unfortunate meeting with Rick's group. Luckily, Negan has been busy seeing to his other wives. This is the only time that this marriage poses a gain to any of us.

When we want time alone.

Sadly, this time alone has given me time to think about what happened and no matter what I do Simon's words still echo in the back of my mind.

'Do you still think he's a good guy?'

Is he? Is he really still the man who saved my little Fee? The man who told her stories and held her as she slept if she was scared? The man who held me tight when I lost her? Was he really the same man?

Of course, this wasn't the first time Simon has possible this question to me. Anytime Negan uses Lucille on someone other than a rotter, he poses the same question. Normally it doesn't bother me as much as it did this time. It has always been the same setup. He picks someone to die and kills them, not matter who's watching. So why is it so different now?

As these thoughts run through my head I hear a knock on my door.

*knock knock knock*

I sigh softly praying it isn't Negan, or Simon. Not sure who I don't want to see more.

"Come in."

As stand and call out, Frankie enters the room. Frankie, is another one of negan's wives. She has long red hair and blue eyes, hidden behind a face of freckles, with a back set of pale skin. Behind her follows Tanya, another young woman who has married into this big family, if you can call us that. Unlike Frankie, Tanya has brown hair and eye, and just a small mole above the right side of her lip. When the two walk in I let out a sigh of relief, thankful it wasn't one of the man.

"Are you that happy to see us?"

Tanya jokes as she closes the door behind the two of them when they come in.

"Trust me, you girls have no idea."

Frankie and Tanya sit at a small table I have set up in my room, as I lean against one of the bed posts. We set in silence for a few minutes before Tanya breaks the silence.

"Are you doing okay? After what happened I mean. We heard from some of the guys it was a little more brutal than normal."

Tanya scoffs

"We shouldn't be able to talk about this like it's normal. It shouldn't be a normal thing for our husband to bash someone's brains in."

I scoff softly.

"Hell, it shouldn't be normal to say 'our husband' either, but here we are."

I shake my head as Frankie nods and shrugs, looking across at Tanya. I look at the two of them and sigh.

"But, yes I'm fine…. But i'm sure that's not all you girls came here for."

They both shake their heads. Tanya, being the more vocal of the two is the first to start explaining why they came.

"Negan is leaving the Sanctuary tomorrow to get supplies from the new town. We'd like you to stay here with us."

Frankie sits up and explains more.

"You look so scared when you come back and we are worried about you."

Tanya nods,

"Yeah, I am our friendship came about in an odd way, sure. But we still love you and we still care about you."

I smile and nod.

"Thank you, girls. Honestly, I have been thinking about staying behind."

The two smile and stand, before the three of us join in an embrace.

Not long after we begin our hug, we hear an all too familiar voice from the doorway.

"Hmm… I can't say I don't enjoy the sight of the three of you getting along. But I need to talk to (Y/N)."

The three of us look up to see the ever so charming smile of our husband. Frankie and Tanya let go of me and start out of the room.

"We'll see ya later."

"Bye."

I wave at them as they leave.

"Bye girls."

Once Frankie and Tanya are out of the room, Negan closes the door behind them. Then he turns to me and flashes me his bright, dashing smile.

"How are you today, (Y/N)."

I smile softly and rather tiredly, still not having gotten any sleep over the past few nights.

"I'm alright, still really tired. How are you?"

"Oh you know me, baby. I'm always ready to party."
As he says this, he moves in close to me and places his hands on my cheeks, kissing me deeply. Our kisses continue, I wrap my arms around his neck, his hands still on my cheeks. Eventually our hands begin to explore the other's body. As our kisses deepen he gently lays me onto the bed and kisses down my body. Thankfully, this was one of the time that I enjoyed his love making. Not being as rough as he normal is, but still rather rough. Biting my ear and kissing me at all the right times and places. I feel his hands rub my hands rather forcefully rubbing my breasts, as I sell feel his erect member slide rather quickly into me. Remaining rather slow and rhythmic he pulses into body. As he leans down to kiss and bite my neck I reach up and wrap my arms around his neck and arm, almost baring my face in his shoulder.

Once our passions have ended, he lays next to me and pulls me into him, a little out of breath.

"That was amazing, (Y/N)"

I am also out of breath and nod.

"Yeah it really was."

He takes a few breaths as we lay together, our bodies close.

"Listen Darling, I want you to come with me today. We are gonna go to prick's little town and get out shit."

I try to think of any reason not to go. Unfortunately, I can't think of a reason, other then Frankie and Tanya don't want me to and since that wasn't really a good reason i decide to just go.

"Sure, it'll be a nice day out."

He laughs and sighs, adjusting his body to under mine.

"That's exactly what I was thinking, darling."