I really wanted to get this up earlier, but of course school always gets in the way. I know several of you asked me for Elizabeth/George interaction and some more member of our favorite team. I promise you guys won't be disappointed! The much requested Elizabeth/George scenes are on the way. The end of this chapter features an ever curious Rossi, and I definitely plan to include everyone else. I hope no one is disappointed and you stick with me to the end!
XxxxxX
Two weeks. It had been two whole weeks since Emily had reached out to Hotch and spent the night at his apartment. Emily hadn't called him back, though he'd called her several times. She didn't even bother reading the texts he sent.
She didn't want to burden him, as juvenile as it sounded. Clearly he cared. Clearly he wanted to be there for her; but she just couldn't bring herself to talk to him. She was always more open with him. It's like he was her safe place, the one she could always go to. And she knew that she had been that for him, could still be that for him.
Maybe in another life, maybe if she didn't run away when she felt like she couldn't handle the situation. Try as she might to not put the blame on herself, how could she not? She had been the one to put the distance between them three years ago. She was the one doing that same thing right now.
"Emily?" She heard the sound of her mother's voice, pulling her out of her thoughts.
She glanced away from the window she had been intently staring out of and met Elizabeth's eyes. Today was a really good day for her mother, and instead of embracing it, she was worrying about herself.
"Em, are you okay? You seem...different lately." Elizabeth commented.
Emily was pretty sure Elizabeth knew nothing about what had happened two weeks ago. And if she did, she wasn't going to bring it up. Neither was Emily. The last thing she wanted was to make Elizabeth feel worse or at fault.
Emily just nodded. "What were you saying?" She asked, eager to put her mind elsewhere.
"You were asking me why I haven't allowed anyone else to come see me, but then you just kind of stopped listening to me." Elizabeth said.
"Because your reasoning doesn't make any sense, Mother." Emily snapped, sounding much harsher than she meant to.
Elizabeth flinched a little at Emily's tone, but her tone never faltered.
"I can't expect you to try and understand this…understand me. I have to ask what day it is, what year it is every single morning when I wake up and am having a 'good day.'" She spat the term resentfully. "Sometimes I'll have gone two days in some kind of weird state where I think I'm still an active ambassador, but I don't know it. I don't know what I do, I don't know what I say, and I don't even know whether you show up or not. It's terrifying, Emily. I can't- I can't let people see me that way." Emily's face softened, she hadn't meant to upset her mother like this. It was true, some days Emily came to visit and found Elizabeth sitting at her desk in her room, writing something in a notebook with her glasses low on her nose; just like she used to wear them.
No matter what Emily did on those days, Elizabeth would send her away. Sometimes, she recognized Emily, but thought she was a child or a teenager. Sometimes, she didn't recognize Emily at all. It had only been a few weeks since Emily had come back to DC, but already it felt like a lifetime had passed.
Emily moved from her place at the foot of the bed and sat next to Elizabeth, sitting propped up on the pillows. The two sat there embracing each other for a few minutes, neither of them saying anything.
"I can't let George see me that way." Elizabeth whispered finally.
"I'm sorry, Mom. I just…he's been so helpful, and he doesn't push me for information about what's happening, and I don't always tell him. He really cares about you. You know that, don't you?" Emily asked.
Elizabeth nodded. "I do know that. I'm just not ready. Not now."
Emily nodded in understanding.
"What about you, Em? What's on your mind?" Elizabeth asked.
"I'm fine." Emily assured her mother, sitting up a little straighter; though she wasn't being very convincing.
"You're not." Elizabeth pressed.
"Yeah, well, neither are you." She regretted the words as soon as she said them. She bit her lip and reached out to grab Elizabeth's hand.
"I didn't-I didn't mean that...I just- I meant that...that I think you should let other people visit you. Let George visit you." Emily said, although that wasn't the truth. Not the whole truth.
Elizabeth sighed, the only response Emily got. Emily felt terrible; she hadn't meant to let her own personal problems interfere with taking care of her mother.
"I'm sorry, Mom. I really didn't mean to upset you." Emily said gently.
Elizabeth found Emily's eyes; the ones that mirrored her own. "I know you didn't. I know you handle things by pretending you're not worried about them when you actually are. You've always been that way. I never called you out on it when you were younger, maybe I should have. But I'm here now. You can tell me, darling." Elizabeth said, her voice even and calm. Emily had rarely ever heard her talk like that.
"It's just…an old friend of mine. That's all." Emily managed to say.
Elizabeth just looked at Emily, wordlessly begging her to say more.
Emily blew out a breath. "You remember Aaron Hotchner, right?" Emily asked tentatively, worried that she may not remember and grow frustrated; which happened all too often.
"I think so. That was…a long time ago." Elizabeth's brow furrowed.
"It was, it's okay." Emily squeezed Elizabeth's hand. "I um- well, he's my friend; but we haven't been very friendly lately. And a couple of weeks ago I- I went to his house. And I stayed the night. We didn't- uh," Emily trailed off. "I just slept on his couch." She added quickly. In his arms. In his clothes. She left that part out. "And the next morning his girlfriend showed up."
"Oh, Emily." Elizabeth said.
"It's okay, she said she understood. But…but I just feel like I intruded." Emily admitted.
"Have you spoken to Aaron about this?" Elizabeth asked.
Emily shook her head. "I haven't…talked to him at all, actually. Not since that night."
"Well, why on Earth not? Don't you think it would be better to actually know what's going on in his head instead of sitting here worrying?" Elizabeth asked bluntly.
"I don't know." Emily said quietly.
"There's more, isn't there?" Elizabeth prodded gently.
Lately, Emily had welcomed it greatly when Elizabeth acted on those "motherly instincts," but right now she kind of wished her mother would go back to not talking to Emily about her personal life.
However, once Emily opened her mouth, it seemed like she couldn't stop talking.
"I keep telling myself that I don't want to interfere with his life. I mean, he has a really demanding job. He has a son, a son that needs every spare moment he can get with his dad. And he has a girlfriend. A pretty serious one, at that. So, I shouldn't want to stay the night with him again. I shouldn't practically depend on him to make me feel better. Especially not when he has this whole other life he's living." Emily rambled.
"A life without you in it." Elizabeth offered.
"No, no." Emily said quickly. "That's not what I mean. We're just- we've always been friends. Good friends."
"Em, I may be old, and my brain function may be deteriorating or whatever, but I know what I see in you right now. Because when I look at you, right now, like this- I just see myself." Elizabeth said.
Emily raised a brow, and Elizabeth continued.
"You want to be strong. You don't want anybody to see you when you're weak. I bet you've never taken a sick day in your whole life, even when you were a step away from your death bed. Am I right?" Elizabeth asked, Emily nodded even though it was rhetorical.
"You've found someone you trust. Somebody that you are okay with seeing you break a little. You can't let him get away, Emily." Elizabeth said. "You can't. You need to call him. Text him. Send a letter via carrier pigeon if you have to."
Emily let out a tiny laugh through her blurry tear-filled vision.
"Let's make a deal, okay?" Emily offered, blinking back the tears and hoping her voice didn't crack.
Elizabeth nodded.
"I'll talk to Aaron if you talk to George." Emily said, her voice full of determination.
"Okay," Elizabeth agreed, suddenly pulling Emily into a hug. "Okay." She said again. Emily didn't say anything, she just returned the hug and didn't let go.
XxxxxxxxX
Hotch heard the door to his office creep open. He didn't bother looking up from the paperwork he had thrown himself into. He didn't need to, to know that none other than David Rossi had entered the room. No one else would wear leather shoes that expensive.
"Aaron, what are you still doing here?" He heard the man ask as he sat himself down in the chair in front of Hotch's desk. Hotch glanced at the clock on the wall, it was after 6. Hotch had been here way later than that in the past, but lately he'd been trying to leave by 5:30, to get home to Jack and to see him off to bed.
"I'm leaving in a few minutes, Dave." Hotch replied, not bothering to look up and face his friend yet.
"What's going on with you?" The older man questioned. He wasn't accusing or patronizing, just genuinely concerned. He had noticed Hotch seemed a bit off the past couple of weeks. He wasn't himself. He was quieter; he was more serious than normal. He was always checking his phone.
"What? Nothing." Hotch said quickly, a little too quickly.
Rossi reached over and grabbed Hotch's pen out of hi hand, forcing Hotch to finally look up at him.
"Is Jack okay?" Rossi asked.
"Jack's great." Aaron said honestly.
"Are you and Beth okay?" Rossi pressed.
Hotch and Beth had spent the rest of her stay in DC together two weeks ago. They ate dinner together every night, most nights with Jack; but they had managed to slip away together for one night before she left. They took Jack to the zoo one day. It had been great, and Hotch had been mostly happy.
Mostly.
He couldn't stop thinking about Emily. She wouldn't talk to him in any capacity. He wondered if she was okay, if she was still hurting. Not knowing was driving him insane.
And truthfully, after spending time with her, he realized how much he missed her.
The brunette was on his mind practically every waking moment of every day, and he couldn't figure out why. Of course he cared for her; of course he wanted her to be okay. But this was different. He was well aware that she was perfectly capable of handling herself. He knew, quite well, that she would come to him when she needed someone to listen to her. He knew there was no way in Hell she was going to be coerced into talking, or to accepting comfort when she didn't think she needed it.
But for whatever reason, he couldn't shake this desire to hold her close and make everything in her world right again.
Of course, he wasn't about to relay all this to the man sitting across from him.
"We're doing great too, actually." Hotch replied finally.
"Are you sick or something?" Rossi continued, determined to get the answer out of this stubborn, stubborn man.
Hotch had to crack a small smile at the man's insistence.
"No, Dave. I'm not sick. Healthy as a horse." He said.
"Then what's been going on? You keep checking your phone like it's some kind of lifeline." Rossi said.
"It's just- a friend, Dave. A friend of mine is having some…some personal struggles and I'm trying to help this friend out. It's alright." He reassured Rossi.
"Is this friend someone I know?" Dave wondered.
"Couldn't tell ya," Hotch said coolly, really wanting to disclose more information and maybe get some kind of advice. But he couldn't do that to Emily, he couldn't do anything to cause a rift in the trust she'd placed in him.
As fate would have it, his phone began to vibrate on his desk.
Emily's name flashing across the screen.
