Chapter 23
Anakin awoke first the next morning, and smiled when he saw Padmé asleep in his arms. He kissed her forehead and slipped out of the bed to let her sleep.
"Good morning," Anakin said as he lifted Leia out of her crib. He kissed her cheek. "Are you hungry?"
"Yes, Daddy," she said.
"Me too," he said. "Let's go make breakfast."
Threepio was in quite a tizzy when he saw Anakin in front of the stove making scrambled eggs with Luke and Leia standing on chairs beside him.
"Oh dear, may I help you here, sir?" Threepio asked.
"Nope," Anakin said, "we've got this under control."
"My turn to stir," Luke said.
"Now be careful," Anakin said as he handed Luke the spoon.
"I want a turn!" Leia said.
"Leia, how about you help Threepio make some toast," Anakin said.
"Okay Daddy," Leia said as Threepio helped her off the chair.
Padmé woke up to Anakin kissing the tip of her nose. She smiled as she opened her eyes.
"Good morning," he said giving her a smile.
"Good morning," she said. "What time is it?"
"Almost 8," he told her, handing her a nightie. "The kids are bringing you breakfast in bed, so you might want to put this on," he said.
Padmé laughed. "Good idea," she said, sitting up and pulling the nightgown over her head. Anakin left her to go and help the twins bring in a tray of breakfast in to Padmé.
Padmé smiled as the twins helped their father carry a tray of breakfast over to her. "Thank you so much!" she said. "This is wonderful!"
Luke and Leia climbed up onto the bed to watch their mother eat.
"It is good, Mommy?" Luke asked.
"It's delicious!" Padmé said. "I had no idea you guys could cook."
"Daddy helped us a little," Leia said. Padmé looked at Anakin who simply smiled.
"Well Daddy is a very good cook too," she said.
"Excuse me Master Anakin, but General Kenobi is here," Threepio announced at the door.
"Okay," Anakin said, getting off the bed. He headed out to the living room to meet Obi-Wan.
"Morning Anakin," Obi-Wan said. "I hope I'm not disturbing you."
"Not at all," Anakin said. "Me and the kids were just giving Padmé breakfast in bed."
Obi-Wan smiled. "Delightful," he said. "I just wanted to let you know that we're going to be leaving orbit soon. Did you have any other business in the capital before we leave?"
Anakin thought for a moment. "Yes," he said. "I do. Padmé and I are going to Tatooine with the twins, and we'll need some provisions."
"Of course," Obi-Wan said. "Let me know when you've completed your business. We can take you to Tatooine if you wish."
"No, that's okay," Anakin said. "I'm sure you'll be needed by the new government. You don't want to be stuck in the Outer Rim."
"Who does?" Obi-Wan said with a smile. "Very well, let me know if you change your mind. I do hope you'll keep me posted on your progress."
"I will," Anakin said. "I have a favour to ask of you while you're here," he said.
"Oh? And what is that?" Obi-Wan asked.
"Can you stay here and watch the twins while Padmé and I are on the planet?" Anakin asked.
Obi-Wan smiled. "It will be my pleasure," he said.
Anakin and Padmé spent a large part of the day shopping for necessities to take to Tatooine. They had arranged to have all of the items they bought sent to the new cruiser that Anakin had purchased. Once they had completed their shopping, they picked up dinner and headed to their apartment on Republica Boulevard.
"I don't know about you, but I'm beat," Anakin said as they sat down to eat their take out.
"Me too," Padmé said.
"This is great," Anakin said as he dug into his food. "I tell you, I'll never take eating real food for granted again."
Padmé smiled. "I'm sure there are a lot of things you'll never take for granted again," she said.
Anakin nodded. "Absolutely," he said.
"I don't know how you lived in that suit for so long," she said. "It must have been so claustrophobic."
"It was," he said. "It was hell. I felt so isolated, so ...inhuman."
Padmé nodded. "And now look at you," she said with a smile.
"Yeah, big improvement," he said. "I just wish I could do something about my limbs," he said.
"Try to be patient," she said, putting her hand on his. "You've worked a miracle, Ani," she said. "And I don't just mean physically."
Anakin smiled at her. "I still have a way to go," he said.
"We'll get through this, Ani," she said, squeezing his hand.
Anakin nodded, and picked her hand up to kiss it. Padmé looked into his eyes, seeing in them the same longing that she felt herself.
"I'm not really that hungry, are you?" Padmé said.
"Not at all," he said. They stood up and Anakin walked over to her. She took his face in her hands as Anakin wrapped his arms around her waist. "I love you," he said, pulling her close.
Padmé smiled. "I love you too," she said. He picked her up into his arms, as he had done so many times before, and kissed her all the way to the bedroom...
Later
"I hope Obi-Wan isn't worn out when we get there," Anakin said as he and Padmé returned to the ship.
Padmé smiled. "He's used to looking after them," she said. "He'd make a great father, actually. Pity he'll never have the chance."
Anakin nodded. "The Jedi Code needs to change," he said. "It's outdated and unfair."
"I couldn't agree more," Padmé said. "Perhaps you can recommend that."
Anakin shook his head. "I don't plan to have anything to do with the Jedi," he said. "I have no place among them. I'm not sure I ever did, to tell you the truth."
Padmé frowned. "How can you say that?" she asked. "You're the Chosen One, Anakin. The greatest Jedi of all time."
Anakin looked at her. "I know you believe that, Angel, but I don't," he said. "I never would have done such monstrous things if I was the Chosen One."
Padmé didn't know what to say to such a statement. She knew that Anakin was struggling with the past, and probably always would. All she could do was support him and do her best to ride through the rough times with him.
Obi-Wan was dozing off when Anakin and Padmé arrived at their quarters. He woke up at once and looked up at them with a smile.
"Sorry we're so late," Padmé said.
"Not to worry," Obi-Wan said, standing up. "The younglings are fast asleep."
"And you're not far off," Anakin said with a smile.
Obi-Wan chuckled. "Well it's past my bedtime," he said. "Was your day successful?"
Anakin and Padmé looked at each other. "Yes, very successful," Anakin said with a smile.
Obi-Wan was sure he was missing something, but decided it was none of his business. "Well I'll be off to bed," he said. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight Obi-Wan, and thank you," Padmé said with a smile.
"It was entirely my pleasure," Obi-Wan said, an d then left them.
"It was entirely my pleasure," Anakin said, giving Padmé a kiss.
Padmé laughed, and took his hand. "Come on, it's past our bedtime too."
Anakin didn't argue the point.
The sound of a thousand footsteps echo through the great hall, filled with a dread sense of purpose. The first place we go is the council chamber, for I have sensed the presence of several Jedi within its walls. It is dark when we enter the chamber, but that doesn't stop me from finding the younglings that are hiding there. One of them, thinking I'm there to help, shows himself to ask me what is happening. I answer his question with a slash of my lightsaber. The boy was no more than seven years old...
Anakin awoke with a gasp. He sat up in bed, his heart racing, cold sweat on his skin. He covered his face with trembling hands as he fought to push the monstrous images from his mind. You did that...that was your hands that killed them...their blood is on your soul and will never be washed away...
"Ani? Are you okay?"
Anakin turned to look at his wife. "Go back to sleep," he told her, not wanting to tell her about his nightmare. He got out of their bed and left the room. Padmé watched him leave, anxiety filling her. She knew her husband well enough to know that he'd had a nightmare, and she was almost certain the content of it. He's dreaming of the past, she reflected anxiously. How many more nights would the crimes he'd committed haunt him? Would he ever truly know peace? Perhaps that's the price you must pay, Ani, she thought sadly. Was it worth it?
Anakin sat alone in the living room, shaken from his nightmare. He used the Force to calm himself, but the images were too vivid, too painful to be purged easily from his mind. Take deep breaths, Anakin, he heard Qui-Gon tell him. Slow, deep breaths...clear your mind. But Anakin could not clear his mind. The screams of the younglings he'd slain echoed through it, the sight of their murdered bodies filled it. Calm, Anakin, be at peace...concentrate... Anakin frowned, and did his best. He focused on the beautiful things in his life: the faces of his children, their laughter, the love of his wife...That's it, Anakin, they must be your touchstone...focus on them when you feel the darkness threatening you...
Anakin opened his eyes as he sensed the presence of someone in the room with him. Padmé stood before him, watching him with a concerned expression on her face. Wordlessly he opened his arms and she came to him, holding him close as he wrestled with the demons of the past.
Padmé woke up several hours later. Anakin was sound asleep, with his head resting on her lap. Padmé smiled, and gently stroked the spiky blond hair that was sprouting on top of his head. My poor Ani, she thought sadly. You've suffered so much, and are suffering still...She wondered, not for the first time, if there would ever be a time when Anakin was truly free of the past. Perhaps it's the price you must pay for your crimes, she wondered. To live forever haunted by what you did.
The next morning
Luke and Leia were excited as the family prepared to leave for their sojourn to Tatooine. Threepio had packed up all the belongings that had been brought on board the ship, and had brought them to the hangar deck for loading on board the shuttle. Anakin and Padmé spent a few minutes surveying the quarters for anything important before leaving for the shuttle.
"Well, looks like we've got everything," Padmé said. "Time to go."
Anakin nodded. "Yes it is," he said. "Come on kids," he said, holding out a hand to each twin. "Time to go on our big trip."
Anakin and Padmé left their quarters and headed to the turbo lift, each of them holding the hand of one of their twins. Anakin could feel the adrenalin flowing as they made their way to the hangar deck. He was about to embark on a new chapter of his life, one that he hoped would bring about his absolute redemption. Padmé looked at him, seeing in his eyes that he was both excited and full of trepidation. "This is going to be wonderful, Anakin," she said, reaching out and squeezing his hand. "I'm so proud of you."
Anakin smiled. "Thanks, Angel," he said. The turbolift stopped and the doors opened, and Anakin stood in a state of shock. The corridor was lined on both sides with officers and crew, all standing at attention. As Anakin stepped off the lift with his family, each and every crew member saluted. Padmé felt a lump in her throat as she witnessed the moving tribute to Anakin by his former crew. Clearly they had the utmost respect and admiration for him, as evidenced by their display. No one said a word as the Skywalker family moved down the corridor towards the hangar bay. As they reached the hangar deck, they were met by the bridge crew. Anakin stopped to shake hands with each officer, wishing them the best and thanking them for their service.
Finally they entered the hangar bay. Obi-Wan stood there, waiting for them.
"Was that your idea?" Anakin asked.
"Not at all," Obi-wan said. "But a fitting tribute, don't you think?"
"Absolutely," Padmé said, giving Anakin a smile.
Anakin wasn't so sure.
"All the best," Obi-Wan said, shaking Anakin's hand. "Let me know if there's anything I can do for you. I wish you well in your latest adventure."
"Thank you," Anakin said. "I'll be in touch."
"Of course," Obi-Wan said. "May the force be with you, Anakin," he said.
Anakin smiled. "And with you."
Obi-Wan said goodbye to Padmé, and gave hugs to the twins, and then stood back and watched the Skywalker family climb onboard the shuttle and disappear from sight.
"He'll be just fine," Qui-Gon said as he appeared beside Obi-Wan. "He is fulfilling his destiny."
Obi-Wan nodded with a sigh. "Yes, I know Master," he said. "But I will miss him. I will miss them all."