This one gave me some issues, because I wanted it to be absolutely perfect. I'm not so sure I succeeded in that, but I will say that I am quite pleased with this one. I hope you guys feel the same! Any and all feedback is much appreciated : )

XxxxX

When Emily finally made it back to the hospital, she found George and JJ in the waiting room just as she suspected they would be. What she didn't expect, however, was a third person waiting with them.

Hotch was sitting next to JJ, the three of them immersed in quiet conversation. When they saw her approaching, they stopped. They didn't stare at her or give her looks of pity, for which she was grateful.

She didn't really know what to say, so she didn't say anything. She sat down next to Hotch and hoped someone would start talking soon, because she didn't trust herself to speak without crying again. She had done enough of that for now.

"You didn't get too cold out there, did you?" Hotch asked softly. Under any other circumstance, Emily probably would have rolled her eyes and laugh at him. It wasn't like it was the middle of winter and snowing out, just a bit of a chill lingered in the early summer night air.

Her only response to his question was a slight shake of her head.

No one knew what to say for a few minutes, but finally Emily decided to ask the question she'd been thinking since she got back.

"What are you doing here?" She asked quietly, picking at a loose thread at the hem of her shirt.

"JJ told me. I thought maybe you could use another friend." Hotch shrugged.

Emily's brow furrowed. "What about Jack?"

Hotch had to smile softly at her, here she was in her absolute worst moment, and still she was thinking of others first. Her compassion amazed him. "Jessica came to stay with him. He was asleep, anyway, when JJ called. He probably won't even wake up until morning." Hotch assured her.

"Okay." Emily nodded. She was incredibly too spent both emotionally and physically to argue with him.

"Do you guys need a ride home?" Hotch asked, his attention on Emily and George. "Because I would be happy to take you, if you wanted." He continued.

"No," Emily said quickly and more forcefully than she meant to. "I mean...that's a really nice offer but I...I don't really, um, want to be there." Emily admitted, referring to the house. "I thought maybe we could stay at a hotel or something for tonight, if George didn't want to go home either." She explained.

"You could stay with me." Hotch offered.

Emily wanted to smile appreciatively at the gesture, but she just couldn't force herself to do it. "That's really sweet, but your apartment is kind of small for four people." She pointed out honestly. There were only two bedrooms, one for Hotch and one for Jack. Emily had slept on the couch a few times recently, but it wouldn't be big enough for both her and George. And she was pretty sure that despite her close friendship with Hotch, sharing a bed was off limits.

"You could stay with us," JJ said simply. "We have a guest room and there's a pull out couch in the den. There's plenty of room. Also, you got lucky because I just went grocery shopping two days ago. So there's plenty of food, too." JJ said gently, not wanting either of them to feel like they were being coddled too much, but understanding the feeling of not wanting to go to the house they had shared with Elizabeth.

Emily shrugged. She honestly didn't care where she stayed tonight, as long as she could curl up under a blanket and pretend like her life wasn't happening.

Unbeknownst to Emily, JJ looked at George and wordlessly communicated an agreement they had made while waiting for Emily to come back.

"Emily, if you'd like, you could stay with Aaron and I could stay with JJ. That way neither of them will have to worry about two extra people staying with them." George told her, knowing that was something she was worrying about. He had also seen Emily's friendship with Hotch grow these past few months, and he knew that tonight she would need him. Unlike Emily, he had been prepared for Elizabeth's death. He knew that each day with her was a gift, and while he was completely devastated by her passing, he had somewhat mentally prepared himself. He knew that Emily hadn't done that. She wasn't necessarily in denial; she had accepted that Elizabeth's condition was terminal. However, George knew that Emily was counting on years longer with her mother, even after the stroke.

He knew that she was going to need someone like Hotch to get through this, and he was willing to give her that.

Emily just shrugged. "Whatever you think is best." She said dully, glancing down at the white tiled floor.

She felt a hand rest on her shoulder. "Come on, let's get out of here." Hotch said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Emily just nodded and forced herself to stand. She felt like she was in a fog, or a dream. She had so much she wanted to say to George and to JJ. She wanted to tell George how sorry she was, and that she would do anything she could to help him get through this if he needed her. She wanted to thank JJ for being such an amazing friend to her, for always being there no matter what. She wanted to tell Hotch that she really appreciated how nice he was being, but that she would be fine on her own tonight.

But she didn't do any of those things; it was like she was watching herself from somewhere else. She kept telling herself to do something or to say something, not just stand there like a statue as JJ and George hugged her goodbye. Her body seemed frozen, unwilling to cooperate with what her mind wanted her to do.

"Wait, JJ." she said finally, as she felt herself being pulled away. Her voice didn't even sound like her own.

JJ took Emily's hand in hers. "I'm right here, Em."

"I need you to…you have to tell Henry that my mom loved her card. Don't tell him that…that I didn't get it here." Emily said, her breathing quickening and her eyes starting to sting.

JJ squeezed her friend's hand, fighting back tears of her own. "I'll tell him." JJ promised, and Emily felt herself being pulled away again.

Somehow, she found herself in Hotch's car. She didn't remember how she got there, but here she was; staring out the window as Hotch drove quietly to his apartment.

Neither of them spoke until Hotch parked the car, leaving the two of them sitting in the comfort of Hotch's SUV together.

"You can sleep in my room tonight; I'll sleep on the couch." Hotch offered.

"I don't want to kick you out of your bed, Aaron." Emily argued, albeit weakly.

"You're not. I'm offering. I figured you would want to be alone tonight, anyway." He told her simply.

Emily just nodded and unfastened her seatbelt before she opened the door and stepped out into the cool night. She let Hotch lead her up to his door, stepping in first when he signaled for her to go in ahead of him. She was pretty sure she saw Jessica leave, maybe even heard her say something, but Emily didn't acknowledge her. She wasn't trying to be rude, she really liked Jessica, but she couldn't handle people right now. She was honestly amazed that she'd even agreed to stay the night here.

It was nearing midnight, so the apartment was still, dark, and silent.

Emily didn't say anything when Hotch lightly grabbed her by the hand and led her to his room.

He guided her to the bed, telling her that she should sit down. So she did. Seconds later, he placed a pair of dark grey sweatpants and a light blue t-shirt next to her. She looked up at him, but still didn't say anything.

"I figured you'd want something else to sleep in," He shrugged.

"Thanks," She picked up the clothes and placed them on her lap. "Are you sure you want me to sleep here?" She asked him as she bit her lip. "I mean, I'd be fine on the couch." She continued. Also, she was pretty sure she wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight, anyway, she thought.

"I know you would be fine, but I want you to sleep in here, okay? I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't serious." He smiled at her, but she didn't return it.

"Okay," She said simply.

"Do you need anything? I can make you some tea or something." Hotch asked, just wishing there was more he could do for his friend.

Emily shook her head. "Thanks, though." She managed to add. "I'm sorry I'm…like this."

"Hey," Hotch said firmly, but gently, as he moved to sit next to her on the bed. "Don't apologize, Emily. You have nothing to be sorry for." He said, waiting for her to look up and meet his eyes. She nodded in agreement.

"If you need anything tonight, just come get me. You won't be bothering me, even if I'm asleep." He assured her, knowing she would protest.

She didn't, though. She just nodded again and Hotch took that as a cue to leave.

He softly headed into the living room. He knew Emily needed space; she hated to show emotion in front of other people. He felt the same way, and he knew when she was ready, she would come to him. He planned to be there when that happened. It was hard to say just when, but Emily was going to come to terms with her mother's death, and she would need someone there with her once she did.

He knew what it felt like to lose someone. Granted, he hadn't much cared when his own parents died, but that was a different circumstance. When Haley died, though, a part of himself died along with her. It didn't matter that they were divorced; it didn't matter that they couldn't seem to agree on anything. He had shared so much with Haley, she was the mother of his child. Her death had left him with an array of emotions that he still struggled with some days.

Losing someone is never easy. Even if the death is expected, it doesn't make it any easier. Even if bridges were burned and final goodbyes were said, death is never easy. It's so final, a permanent end to a life that a person had lived. Whether short or long, or full of magic and adventure or simple and quiet; a life is lost. Haley's life had been rich and wonderful, despite their messy divorce. He knew that Haley was learning to forgive him, and she didn't die hating him. That helped him sometimes, when the guilt seemed to overtake him. He was coping, even after almost five years, trying to stop blaming himself for Haley's death.

Elizabeth Prentiss had lived an amazing life; she had done and seen so many things in her life. She had made an impact in the world, which is all most people want to do. Her loss would affect many people, he knew she had many friends all over the world. He knew Emily was going to experience some of the same guilt and confusion that he had felt when Haley died. He hoped he could provide her with the kind of support he knew that she was going to need. After Haley, Hotch thought he was utterly alone in his feelings. But then a few months later, he'd learned of JJ's sister, and then he knew he wasn't so alone anymore.

It's strange how death sometimes helps people bond, Hotch mused. The loss of one life can bring two lost and hurting people together. Losing a loved one is a unique feeling. It can only truly be felt by those who have experienced the same thing. Hotch hoped Emily would open up to someone soon. It didn't even have to be him, the entire team had their own stories. Any of them would be willing to listen to her and help her out, so long as she would let them.

XxxxX

Emily felt like she couldn't breathe. She'd changed into Hotch's clothes after he left, and she really had tried to sleep. A few hours of unconsciousness sounded like absolute heaven to her. She'd been lying in Hotch's bed for what felt like hours, but she was no closer to sleep. She had opened the window in the room just enough to let a slight breeze in, hoping that would help her sleep.

The room still felt stuffy, like there wasn't enough air for her. She had thrown the blankets to the foot of the bed mere seconds after covering herself up. She'd tossed her hair up into the messiest bun ever, and now she was lying in the middle of the bed, sprawled out so she was practically taking up the whole bed.

She just couldn't seem to turn off her thoughts. She felt like she was having multiple thoughts all at once, and she couldn't take the time to process them before another string of thoughts came to her. She sighed and sat up, pulling her knees up to her chest. She couldn't stop thinking about her mother. She wished she could stop. She knew that sounded terrible, Elizabeth hadn't even been dead for that long, and already Emily was trying to forget about it.

Compartmentalizing had been something she'd taught herself at a young age. It was easier to pretend that everything was fine than it was to try and sort out emotions. Emotions were messy, complicated, and confusing. What were you even supposed to feel when someone you loved died? Emily could recite the five stages of grief in her sleep. She'd gone over it with many victims since she'd taken a law enforcement career. But was it really that simple? Was grief an exact science, laid out in five distinct emotions? Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance…what did acceptance even mean? How is a person supposed to just wake up one morning and be okay with death?

Emily had taken to biting her nails as she contemplated these irritating emotions. She could swear she was feeling about 500, not the stupid five she'd always learned about. She glanced down at her hands, realizing she'd bitten her thumb nail down so far that it was bleeding.

She sighed, she really needed to stop doing that. Quietly, she crept out of the room and across the hall to the bathroom, hoping Hotch kept the band aids in the medicine cabinet. She really didn't feel like waking him up to ask him, because she was afraid he would make her start talking. She wasn't ready for that. She didn't think she ever would be.

Luckily, she found a box of band aids and tended to her thumb with ease. She half considered putting a band aid around all her fingers, maybe that way she'd stop biting the nails.

On her way back to Hotch's bedroom, she noticed a lamp on in the living room that hadn't been on a few minutes ago.

Emily slowly stepped into the room, ready to apologize just in case she'd accidentally woken him up. But before she could say anything, he spoke first.

"You didn't wake me." He said quietly. "I haven't slept yet." He sent her a reassuring smile.

"Oh," Emily replied. "Me either." She admitted.

"Wanna come sit?" Hotch asked as he moved to sit up on the couch, making room for her.

She surprised herself by not even hesitating and sitting herself next to him before he'd even finished the question.

"Are you alright?" He asked, motioning toward the newly bandaged thumb.

"Yeah, just a dumb habit I'll probably never break." She told him flatly.

He smiled again, knowing she was right, she was never going to break that nail biting habit no matter how many times she tried.

They sat together for a few minutes, Hotch staying quiet because he knew not to press her, and Emily not speaking because she didn't even know where to start. She wanted to tell him everything and nothing all at once.

Finally, Emily couldn't take it any longer. "I don't remember the last thing I said to her." She blurted.

Hotch nodded, he knew not to tell her not to feel guilty about that. It didn't matter how many times he said it, she was going to feel that way for quite a while, as much as he wished she wouldn't have to. But that's how grief works, each person works through it differently and independently.

"I'm sure it was something nice, I've started telling her that I love her when I leave or before I hang up the phone," Emily said. Then she remembered and her eyes started to water. "Well, I was doing that…" she trailed off.

"I'm sure you told her that the last time you talked to her. I'm sure she knew how much you loved her." Hotch said gently.

Emily shook her head, trying to ward off the tears.

"I've never seen anyone love as fiercely and compassionately as you do. You don't let very many people over your wall, but once you do, you'd do anything for them. You're always there if any of the team needs you. You've always been here for me, no matter what. You'd walk through fire for Jack and Henry. You almost gave your life to protect Declan, and you flew across an ocean for JJ when she needed you." He relayed, recalling so many times over the years that Emily had gone above and beyond for her friends…her family. "And when your mom needed you? You left your job, you left everything in London, and you came here. Even if you'd never said you loved her, she knew. You don't uproot your entire life for someone you don't love."

Emily wasn't even sure when she'd started crying. Tears had started falling and she didn't even know it until Hotch reached up and wiped one away with his thumb.

"I thought…I thought I'd have more time…" Emily managed, before she couldn't talk anymore. She buried her face in her hands and finally let the sobs take over. She hated it, but she couldn't seem to stop them. She'd warded them off for as long as possible, and now it was all she could do to catch her breath.

Hotch wrapped her up in his arms, and when she didn't flinch away, he held her close. She hid her face in the crook of his neck, trying to stay quiet so she wouldn't wake Jack. She wrapped her own arms around his neck, grabbing onto the back of his t-shirt, as if her life depended on it. Hotch knew there was nothing he could say that would calm her, so he just held her close to him and let her cry. Without even thinking about it, he started to run his hand up and down her back like he might for Jack. She didn't protest, so he kept doing it, hoping it was providing even the smallest comfort.

He wasn't sure how long they stayed like that, but eventually Emily's tears stopped. Hotch released his hold on her, but she tightened hers, not wanting to leave the sanctuary of his arms. So he hugged her to him again, and he kept her there until he felt her breathing even out, signaling that she was asleep.

Slowly and carefully, he managed to pick her up and carry her to his bedroom. He laid her down gently, and pulled the sheet around her, but not the blanket. He moved it by her feet, where she could get to it if she decided she wanted it.

He left the room reluctantly, though a small part of him was glad that Emily had opened up to him, even just for a bit. She had a long way to go, and if she wanted him there for every step, he would make sure he was there.