171 AG
That night, Kuvira dreamt.
She opened her eyes to darkness. Complete darkness. Full, and deep, and hollow. At first she thought she had lost her sight, but when she tried blinking she could feel her eyelashes touching a soft fabric.
She realized she had been blindfolded.
She instinctively tried to raise her hands up to her face. Her wrists scraped against cold metal, and she realized her hands had been bound behind her back. Her mind snapped into defensive mode and she tried to bend the metal off, but it wouldn't budge. Her breathing quickened, and she strained the muscles in her arms and shoulders as she tried to pull her wrists apart. The metal cut into her skin and she hissed in pain.
"You're finally awake." Su's voice came from somewhere behind her. The sound of her lover's voice didn't put Kuvira completely at ease, but at least she knew who was responsible.
"What the hell is this, Su?" She growled.
"Are you angry with me? That's funny, considering you asked me to do this." Kuvira turned her head back at the sound of Su climbing onto the bed behind her. She suddenly became aware of her current position—face down, on her knees with her ass in the air. She shivered, realizing she was completely naked. Her hands had been bound behind her back, so all she could do was rest her upper body against the bed by her shoulders and chest. She smiled a horrible smile, baring her teeth. At any other time it would have seemed threatening.
"Oh, you are angry," Su said thickly, her voice lowering as she neared her. Kuvira jumped at the touch of Su's hand. The older woman ran her fingers along Kuvira's flesh, starting from the back of her calf and trailing her nails up along her ass, "Beautiful."
"I'm sure I didn't ask for this," Kuvira choked out. Su's hand was resting heavily on her ass. "Let me go."
"That's not going to happen."
Su slowly raised her hand into the air, and Kuvira flinched instinctively. She knew what was coming.
Kuvira woke up from the dream, covered in a cold sweat.
She stared up at the ceiling blankly, trying to think. The dream had been so vivid. Too vivid. The dawn light was just starting to creep into her room. She turned her head, watching as the light grew. Just before the sun had completely risen, she rolled out of bed. She snatched a newly purchased copy of the Daily from the table and walked out onto her balcony to sit at the solitary chair against the sliding glass door.
She pulled the paper open, still not entirely able to believe Yishu had talked her into reading it. The headline story caught her eye.
Earth Queen Rocks Mining Town
She started reading the story, and before she had time to be surprised, she was completely engrossed.
And just like that, she pushed the dream back down into the deep recesses of her mind.
Dancing always seemed to make things better. Even when Yishu was giving her the "what the hell is up with you lately" face at the same time that Suyin shot a meaningful look her way, dancing allowed her to let go of everything and just be.
Even after she switched from the role of bender to acrobat, nothing had really changed. If anything, the increased physical demands on her body only drove her further into her own mind. Feeling the sweat rolling down her neck, along the straining muscles in her shoulders and back. Hearing the pounding blood rushing through her veins. Her controlled breathing. The way her surroundings blurred as she flew past them.
Sometimes, she found herself smiling.
The showers and dressing rooms were in a connected building behind the rehearsal hall. She didn't bother showering. She'd just be heading straight to night duty, and pulling the huge protective petals up around the city always made her work up a sweat. She toweled down her forehead and started to change into her uniform. Yishu was dressing into casual clothing behind her.
"When do you get off tonight?" Yishu asked idly.
Kuvira pressed the towel up against her neck. "Late. Why?"
"We're going to Orihana's tonight, thought you might be interested."
"That place is still open?" How long had it been? She hadn't been there since Su and she had…
"Yep. Normally I wouldn't bother, but you've been looking so down lately so I had to ask."
"And you think that Orihana's is going to solve all my problems?"
"No, but it might help you forget them for a little while. Anyway, I've gotta run. You locking up?"
"Yeah," Kuvira said distantly.
Forget. That would be nice, but how long could it possibly last? She shook her head and pulled her uniform over her head. Once she could see again, she noticed Su had joined her, a few benches down.
It was just the two of them. Alone, together. Kuvira turned her head.
The Matriarch of Zaofu was facing the wall. She pulled her dancing top off over her head.
"Jin hasn't been up to par, lately. Have you spoken with him?" It was so easy for Suyin to control the conversation. Kuvira could feel herself already stepping in line.
"His grandmother passed, not too long ago." Kuvira said tonelessly.
"Ah, I hadn't realized," Suyin said, more quietly.
"I'll talk with him. He'll be on duty with me tonight."
"Oh, that's right. I forgot you were on."
"…Did you have other plans for me?" Kuvira asked, feeling stupid even as she said it.
Suyin looked down. She reached into her bag and held the jeweled necklace that usually hung around her forehead in her hand.
"I… had to give Varrick the guest house."
Kuvira's heart stumbled. She could feel the bottom drop out from her stomach. She smiled and made her way over to the older woman. Her boots echoed in the nearly empty room as she walked towards her.
"I didn't care for the guest house that much anyway," she said in a low voice, stopping to stand closely behind Su. She raised her hand up and trailed her fingers along Su's side. Her skin was soft and warm.
"What are you…" Su began, but her voice trailed off as Kuvira's hand rose upwards. Her strong fingers wrapped themselves around Su's neck. She could feel Su's throat working as she swallowed, and the faint beating of her heart pressed up into her fingers from beneath her veins. She tightened her grip and leaned forward, and her lips found Su's bare shoulder.
"This isn't right. We shouldn't…" Su gasped, barely able to say the words as Kuvira's lips pressed against her skin.
"You say that," Kuvira murmured playfully, "but do you mean it?" Su sucked in a sharp breath as Kuvira bit down, hard enough to leave a mark. Su's grip at the younger woman's thigh tightened, and she pressed against her. Kuvira growled with need and pushed Su up against the dressing room wall.
Su put her hands against the wall and pushed back, grinding her ass against Kuvira's thighs. Kuvira could feel the beating pulse at her neck growing faster. She reached her free hand up to Su's chest, deftly slipping her fingers up inside her bra and cupping one soft breast. She could feel Su shudder with delight. It reminded her of all the other times that she and Su had been together. They had slept in the same bed, woken up to the same view. It had been just enough. Those quiet nights in the guest house, with the cricket white-noise and running water off in the distance; the sound the Su's breathing as she drifted off to sleep. The guest house Suyin had given away.
Kuvira shut her eyes tightly. Su made a desperate-sounding noise as Kuvira's hand left her breast. The younger woman reached back and unsnapped the bra. It fell to the ground in silence. Then, her hand travelled back to Su's chest.
"Don't tease me too much," Su begged. She was moving her hips in that way that Kuvira knew so well; that way that told her just how much Su wanted it. She must have worked herself up into a frenzy during rehearsal. Kuvira hadn't even noticed. Her hand roamed downward, across Su's stomach, and lower.
They both drew in a breath when Kuvira's fingers found the hot, sensitive place between Su's legs. As Kuvira's fingers slowly explored, they inevitably became slick and wet. Su was practically shaking, and she pressed her hands hard into the wall to keep her balance. Kuvira wasn't worried. If she couldn't stand, she'd hold her up. If she lost her balance, she'd keep her steady.
As her fingers flicked against Su's more sensitive areas, she couldn't help but go back to the guest house. She tried to remember the words that had passed between them. She couldn't remember anything, and she hated herself for it. She wanted to believe that promises had been made. Whispered words beneath the moonlight. Words with meaning. Kuvira slowly opened her eyes.
Su choked out a moan and pushed herself up against Kuvira's fingers in time with her movements. She was strong, and Su liked it hard. It didn't take long for Kuvira to bring the older woman over the edge. Her body tensed up and she cried out as she came. The sound of it sent a jolt of desire deep into Kuvira's gut. She loosened her grip at Su's neck, and her hand fell down to hold Su steady.
Su turned to face her. Her face was flushed, and her lips were parted. She was breathing heavily, and her eyes were slits of dark, deep green. Kuvira brought her hand, the one she'd just gotten Su off with, up to her own lips. She licked her fingers. Su watched her in silence, and when Kuvira had finished, the older woman lowered herself down to her knees before her.
Kuvira stood quite still as Su pulled the Captain's pants and underwear down by the waistband. Now it was Kuvira's turn for her breathing and heartbeat to quicken, and her face to flush. Su could tell how bad she wanted it too, judging from the smile on her face as she leaned forward to give Kuvira a few well-placed kisses. Kuvira shuddered and pressed a fist up against the wall to hold herself up.
Her other hand was hanging limply at her side. Su reached up to clasp it, and their fingers became entwined. Su's other hand was gently pressing against Kuvira's thigh. The muscles twitched as Kuvira shifted her weight. Su squeezed Kuvira's hand, and then she started to use her tongue. Kuvira raised her head slightly and sighed with pleasure.
Still, she had forgotten so much. Four years. How many times had they been together? Not enough, but still, too much to keep inside. She had let her mind run free, and now that she was trying to reel it in she found she couldn't. The guest house was Su's to give. She had given it to her, and now she was giving it to someone else.
Kuvira came hard against Su's skillful tongue. The suddenness of it took her by surprise. The sound she made was animalistic, and it startled her when she heard it escape her lips. Su's eyes had been closed, but she opened them to look up at Kuvira, and Kuvira looked down at her in turn.
Kuvira smiled. She smiled to keep the words in. To keep the words from spilling out. The soft, gentle words. The harsh, hard words. The warm blanket words. The sharp knife words. The desperate need and the painful hurt, swirling beneath the dark waters at the edge of the cliff.